Ignoring the LIES, DAMNED LIES, and STATISTICS: Fiesty & Fabulous 40+ers TTC

[xserialshopper]

Open to all 40+ers TTC.

We're friendly - not cliquey (sp?) and would love to know you{smile]

morning everyone

nanbred, if you don't mind me asking, have you had any investigations/learnt anything re your miscarriages - i have been trying to decide if i should try and get the doctor to do some of the tests

Nan - I see where you're coming from. I don't think 2 miscarriages is unusual at 'our age' unfortunately. I think the fiqure is 1 in 5 for all women but quoted as being 1 in 2 in some books I have read for the over 40s!

The fact you can get pregnant is good and of course half the battle. It may just be an age thing which means if you keep trying one will surely stick! I would see the doc anyway as you suggested you are doing.

On Donor - my SIL did this and like you as a last resort but has never regretted it for a minute. I can understand your reservations though.

Hi Rowing boat I thnk you might be mistaking me for another poster when you advise me to look at assisted conception, going to Hungary, etc. I think your post must be directed at someone else as i haven't mentioned any of that stuff so far.

Sorry Peasoup I had meant to type grownup, but I was half asleep.
Grownup, sorry for the mix-up, I thought you would benefit from the assisted conception thread, particularly with the questions about Norway - they are lovely over there.
NB are you on any IVF forums - 'fertility friends' is good and 'fertile thoughts'. There are lots of positive stories and lots of advice.
I don't blame your DP for not wanting treatment - I don't either, but can't see a lot of other routes for us. Not looking forward to the prodding and poking though.

Hi Latestarter

No I haven't pursued tests. As Fifi suggests, I think most likely just 'old eggs' factor. This isn't to suggest you shouldn't go for investigations. I only started ttc late, but if I'd had earlier m/cs I would probably have wanted to discuss with gynae.

Thanks for the tip nanbread, will remember to do that. I'm a little nervous about the whole thing I must admit !

peasoup - hows the charting going ? Re your question about tests earlier, my GP says a day 21 progesterone and sperm count are usually done before a gynae referral, everything else is done by the hospital. Not sure if that is the same everywhere though ?

I'm feeling at a bit of a loose end at the moment. This is my first month of charting (ttc 3 months but got it a bit wrong before), so can't really do very much except wait and see if I get a temp rise etc. Thought it would be sensible to at least get a month of data before seeing the gynae. Its gonna be a long month !!!

Beamel / Peasoup - when I got my referral the GP arranged the 21 day and sperm count, but the results weren't discussed until I got to the Gynae appt.

Hi Juicy
beamel Peasoup I was referred to the reproductive unit at my local hospital. They wrote with an appointment date and also requested that in the interim we had a day three and day 21 test through my GP and DP handed in sperm samples to the reproductive unit.
I phoned my GP and asked for the results because they did have a copy sent, but the GP was a bit vague and just said everything was 'normal'.
The consultant at the appointment told me my FSH results because I asked him, but I don't think they want to spend time going into detail. I think this time I will ask for a copy of the results.

Quiet on here today..............Nothing happening with me. Still on AF and countdown to BDing days. We only bother now for baby making. Sad isn't it?!

Also nowt to report here fifi, just waiting for AF to pole up. Sat is her ETA.

We're lucky if we can manage it for baby making!

and you thought you were sad

Hi All,

Not much happening with me either. Fertility Friend already telling me my temps are erratic (after 1 week), even though I do them at exactly 6am every morning before I get up. Sigh !

Fifi/Juicylucy - I can see how this can take the fun out of things ! I am already becoming a bit obsessed. Today I am completely fixated on midday when I need to pee on another OPK stick !

Anyone convinced by the grapefruit juice thing ? Thought I might try it in place of a glass of wine in the evenings.

Bxx

there is nothing that can replace a glass of wine beamel...trust me i've tried .

can i ask what what everyone else does re drinking....i'm drinking (reasonably moderately) the first half of the month; then abstaining from ovulation till the end of the cycle, but I did have one glass on the weekend - we were out with people with whom i need something!

nothing much happening with me...waiting for AF due on Friday.......though i have to own up to TWO tests, no symptons really just my moods going up and down like a yo-yo; feel like a bit of a twit now

Hee hee, latestarter I think you are right about the wine !

I stopped drinking altogether this month (my first month of ttc properly). Thats a bit extreme for the long term though. Can't see why a moderate amount when AF arrives would be a problem (entirely appropriate I think). I'm not sure wether abstaining in the days leading up to ovulation is neccessary ? Thought I read something about that but I may be confused, I have read so much this week. Maybe someone else here knows ?

Am refusing to buy tests until I need one. That way I won't be tempted !

I think I read that you are supposed to abstain around ovulation. I drink up to about day 10 and then stop until AF inevitably arrives.

I am getting obsessed though - with babies, not wine (!). Took DD out to a cafe for lunch yesterday and it was full of really yummy mummys and babies of around 3-5 months. I was sooooooooooooooo jealous. Both of them being on mat leave and being able to meet for coffee with their babes (I used to love doing that) and just of them having their little bundles! Of course I am lucky to have my lovely DD who is cute and gorgeus so I can't be too jealous. Babies do stop being babies I keep telling myself.

The women were annoying though. They all had Bugaboos except one who had a Quinny and they all looked great! God I'm mean spirited.

You're not mean Fifi, Those feelings are completely normal for someone in our position, and something I'm sure many of the ladies here can identify with.

I had to google bugaboo to find out what it was - lol ! I guess they are the Mercedes Benz of the pram world ?

Hi all, that's a bit of a pain about the temps Beamel. I find them very tricky. Even if you take two temps one after the other they seem to vary. How are the OPKs working out?
We are on day 6 or 7 here and I have to go for a scan/gynae appointment at 8am tomorrow. The hospital is quite far so it will be an early start. Hopefully this will clear up the cyst problem once and for all.

hello,

I haven't been saying anything as I haven't got anything to say. wait, temp, wait, temp and so it goes on. AF due, although I don't know when as last cycle was so wierd.

good luck to all of you with the hospital appointments - rowingboat I hope they have some answers for you. in fact I hope that everyone has some answers.

I drink at the weekends . Not good really, but I have decided that life has to go on anyway...

Just to pour petrol on my bonfire now have thrush. JOY.

Hi all. I am back in the lovely 2ww, just time to sit around twidling my thumbs and come chat here!

Juicylucytoo - well thrush is another pregnancy sign isn't it!! perhaps not.

rowingboat - hope the hosp appt goes well tomorrow

beamel - with temp taking, are you putting thermometer in place and immediately taking temp? If so this does give irratic results I have found. I find that I need to put thermometer in my mouth for a minute or so before pressing button. I also take three temps one after another, and check that they are fairly consitent. It works for me.

Hi All,

Rowing good luck tomorrow. Hope you get some clarification about the cyst.
The OPK's are still negative but today is CD11 so thats OK.

Rainbow thanks for the temping tips - I will try those tomorrow.

After a week of temping my highest measurement has been 36.2, now starting to worry about my thyroid function. I'm always cold (always have been) but no other symptoms.

Good luck for tomorrow rowing xx

Thanks for the good luck wishes everyone!
Beamel are you using the OPKs once or twice a day?
Juicy - is it painful: the thrush? Poor you! Off you go for some canesten tomorrow.
VSF I have been meaning to post and ask you which supplements you have beent taking.
Are you having any side-effects from them?
I think bumpless recommended a few, I got some of the GABA and the 5-htp. I find the 5-htp makes me feel a bit leaden in the morning, but I am sleeping quite well.
The GABA is quite a high dosage 600mg and I think it makes me feel a bit odd: kind of jumpy.
Bumpless are you around?
Good luck for all on the 2WW!!!!

Don't want to be left out, just catching up, haven't been on for a while. Best Wishes for tomorrow Rowing.

Hi everyone,
I have just got back from the hossy and it was quite interesting.
The gynae was the same one I had ages ago, when we were first referred to fertility by my GP. He was a lot more interested this time and much more helpful.
I wonder if it because I requested a second opinion after seeing him.
He said the cyst had gone completely, which is great. He thought the left ovary looked on the big side, just over normal size, but not worryingly enlarged and said he thought that I may ovulate on that side - which is the blocked side, so not much help.
What was very interesting was that he said he thought I may be prone to cysts, which could indicate that I am not releasing the egg and instead am forming cysts. He thought if this were the case I might need hormone injections to stimulate the ovary to release the egg.
He has suggested that he monitors me for up to six weeks to see if this is the case.
So the next step is for me to go back next Tuesday morning to have another scan to see what the ovary is doing.
I can't be sure if this is the problem, but it feels strange to hear that there may be a problem underlying our infertility, because one blocked tube should still give me a chance of conceiving and it hasn't.
Not sure what to think, but will see what happens over the next few weeks.
Hope you are all well.

congrats on the cyst rowing....at least you have some more things to consider and plan for next steps....good luck.

sorry about the thrush juicy..funnily enough I used to get it a lot when i was young and not sexually active, i only seem to get it now when i get a UTI (always bd related!) and have to take antibiotics

i'm thinking maybe i need to try harder on the drinking, it's a real catch 22....everything you read says dont' drink at all when ttc and that makes sense as alcohol is a poison really, but denying yourself things you enjoy also seems counter-productive with such a emotionally draining

i can understand you being jealous in the cafe fifitot, it's never bothered me before, but now it sometimes hurts when i see babies....mind you i would probably be jealous of you with your cutie out having lunch together.

mind you i'm feeling jealous at the moment just because a number of you are into a new cycle of ov, bd and 2ww, so are thus in with a chance and i am still on the 2ww but am fairly sure i am not pg...kind off just want af to come so i can start again....eta friday.