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Original poster

10 days late - false BFN or menopause???

30 replies

grownupbabes · 30/10/2008 20:21

Please can anyone help me here... I am TTC with new DH again, after miscarriage last year; 2 grown up babes already. My cycle is really regular 26 days ALWAYS. This month I am now 10 days late, but 2 tests = BFN. I FEEL pg but is this just wishful thinking?? Is it possible after BFNs? Am I just realistically too old... 43... maybe it is menopause instead? What is going on...can anyone help?

OP posts:
Original poster
grownupbabes · 30/10/2008 21:00

Also, CM ongoing all this month - strange, usually dry after o... some pinkish/brownish spotting in CM about 3-5 days ago. Not sure other symptoms, feel queasy - but afternoon/eve not morning. BBs normal I think. Please what do you think I am going nuts.

OP posts:
Wishing · 30/10/2008 21:19

you could me - im 36 days into a normally 29 day cyce feel very pregnant but got a bfn on monday! thinking of testing again!

goodluck xxx

hobnob57 · 30/10/2008 21:26

I have herad of somewone who was pg but kept getting BFNs. Fingers crossed for you..

hobnob57 · 30/10/2008 21:26

someone

kookykid · 30/10/2008 21:30

grownupbabes, I had this a few months after starting ttc. I have a regular 30/31 day cyle and had a complete blip ending up having a random 43 day cycle. Felt very pg but had BFN after BFN. However, once AF actually arrived my cycle then settled right back down again. I think all it was was that I was stressing out so much about ttc. Hope it is the same for you. Hope you get some answers soon, it's horrible not knowing.

FertilityFiend · 30/10/2008 21:47

Gosh, how unsettling for you! Am not an expert but if this is the first 'irregularity' you've had I would have thought it's unlikely to be menopause, and at 43 you're definitely not too old to be pregnant. Could of course just be delayed period for whatever reason. Keep testing! Fingers crossed for you that it's good news

MrsHappy · 30/10/2008 21:51

I had this last cycle, although was only a few days late. I know for sure that I was late because I am sure when I ovulate, and my luteal phase that cycle was 17 days or so.

One thing that can cause this is a corpus luteum cyst. They go on pumping out progesterone after your period is due and thus maintain the uterine lining. They usually self-resolve apparently.

I hope it's just a late BFP though!

Original poster
grownupbabes · 31/10/2008 09:02

Thanks for this - especially encouragement from FertilityFiend. Still no AF today but tested again and BFN. But it is my first ever irregular cycle, so it does seem unlikely to be 11 days late as if suddenly struck down with menopause. Aaargh what is happening???

OP posts:
AttilaTheMeerkat · 31/10/2008 09:28

I would refrain from testing further; seeing repeated negatives can be heartbreaking.

This may be an anovulatory cycle (i.e one in which ovulation has not occured).

I would suggest you have a blood test done to see what your hormone levels are like now.

FertilityFiend · 31/10/2008 10:00

Yes I'd agree it's definitely worth a trip to the GP asap, especially as you are normally so regular.

To keep testing or not is of course up to you - it's a very personal decision as to what would be more stressful, to have a little information in the form of BFNs, or no information at all by not testing. (whatever you decide, at least with your tests so far you can let the GP know on which days you had BFNs which may possibly be helpful with a diagnosis.)

Personally I'm a bit control-freaky about wanting to know as much as possible about what's going on with my body, even if that brings disappointment, but not everyone's the same.

Good luck - do let us know how you get on

Wishing · 31/10/2008 11:08

another bfn with clearblue digital and first response!! im sleeping so much? i feel sick all day. i just dont get this!!!!

aaaaarrrrggggghhhh!!!!!!!!!!

Original poster
grownupbabes · 31/10/2008 14:20

Wishing... it sounds like we are totally in the same boat! I did clearblue and 1st response too, and they should be the most reliable, aren't they? Thanks everyone for your messages. I am going to grit my teeth and not test again until Monday, and if still weird then you are right, I will get blood test. In the meantime, I am trying to remain "neutral" - not depressed yet. But aaaaarrggghhh I can't think about ANYTHING ELSE...

OP posts:
Wishing · 31/10/2008 16:52

got a blood test just got back from hosp and should hear monday the result, dr thinks i have Tyroid problem and that i arent pg at all, this is just my imagination cos i want to be so much!! dh and i have also just fallen out so im now sat here on my own crying and still none the wiser!! no news there then!! i also feel that the pg is slipping further away - dr says it is impossible for it not to show on a hpt test and wasnt willing to te4st hormones at all, just wanted to test for my throid - until mi started to cry!!

i tried mentioning that i no where people have not had a bfp for 8/12 weeks with ahpt but he said those are just not true, if if wont show on hpt it isnt there basically oh he then went on to say tht hcg levels probably arent detectable in blood levels yet either!?!?!?! well at least i got the blood test - just to wait till monday now!!

Original poster
grownupbabes · 02/11/2008 15:55

Oh poor you, how horrible dr was not sympathetic and then things went wrong at home. I am still the same, noAF now day 41. DH took me to Barcelona for the weekend to stop me stressing ... it hasnt worked lol but still, nice try! Will test again Tues when I get home and if still neg see dr. Will be waiting anxiously to hear yr result monday. Keep hoping!

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rainbowdays · 02/11/2008 16:47

grownupbabes- just wanted to give you some hope, in that when I was thinging I was having early menopause at 40 years old, I researched it and found out that your hcg levels go up in early menopause and you are more likely to get a false positive with a sensitive test than to be getting negatives.

wishing and grownupbabes - Both my mum and my sister were 3 months and 4 months pregnant without getting positive hcg urine tests. My mum only got it confirmed by an internal exam - apparently how they did it back in the old days!, my sister had a scan. So want to say that the doctor was talking rubbish, I am sure you already know this though.

So the situation is either you are both having late AF's or not. Hopefully it will be that your are both pg instead, do let us know when you get more information.... thinking of you.

rainbowdays · 02/11/2008 16:55

wishing - sorry I just read on another thread that af arrived for you. I hope that your dh will be looking after you now.

Wishing · 02/11/2008 22:59

thanks rainbow days, im still waiting to hear form the blood tests to see if i can get an explanation as to what has been going on and sort of draw a line under this month, im coping quite well, susp from the way af has turned out and pain that it may be another early mc!! doctor did warn me about this happening again though last time!!

well at least i sort of know where i am now and that i can start again!

goodluck for you still grown upbabes, keep in touch!! glad dh took you away to try take your mind of it! so sweet, my dh took me out for tea tonight and a nice bottle of wine! they try dont they!!

xxxxxxxxx

Original poster
grownupbabes · 03/11/2008 19:19

rainbowdays, thanks so much, that is really encouraging. Another day gone and still no AF so I have all fingers x now.
Wishing, I am so sorry, but at least you know where you stand... and another month starts from now! Stay hopeful.
Will keep you posted on my news, good or bad.

OP posts:
Original poster
grownupbabes · 05/11/2008 09:40

Hi everyone, well here I am now day 43 which means 18 days late and still no sign of AF. So I tested again (ClearBlue) and BFN. Now I am getting really worried/desperate. Going to the dr this morning, will try and get some answers. Am really scared he will just laugh me off as delusional because of my age... and I desperately still want to be OK to conceive, so if he laughs at me I am scared to lose my hope.

So I am spending my time trying to analyse the pros and cons:

PRO:

  1. AF 18 days late (never ever late)
  2. v. slight pinkish spotting about 10 days ago now completely stopped (implantation?)
  3. no usual premenstrual symptoms - not grumpy!!,no heavy feeling in lower back
  4. put on some weight around the hips and tummy (sigh... am size 10 type person)
  5. feeling sick on and off (imagination??)
  6. occasional tingling BBs and nipples (but not sore or over-inflated)
  7. NO menopause type symptoms: no vaginal dryness - on the contrary, still very mucusy, which is strange if AF due; no hot flushes.

CON:

  1. BFN BFN BFN
  2. Age: 43, correction 44 - birthday 2 days ago
  3. BBs not sore/huge; not feeling really sick; tired a bit, but could just be because busy etc.
  4. BFN BFN

WHAT DO YOU ALL THINK??? Advice please. I know I am going to dr today, but I really need to get a feel for where I am at. DH so desperate for this to be IT, I am feeling under pressure.

OP posts:
blinks · 05/11/2008 09:43

a skipped period? good luck at docs

Original poster
grownupbabes · 05/11/2008 09:47

A skipped period? Does that happen? Why would that happen? It's never happened to me in my entire life...

OP posts:
PixelHerder · 05/11/2008 10:00

Oh poor you what an awful state of limbo to be in. Hope the docs can offer you some help in sorting out what's going on.

An anovulatory cycle could be one possible explanation (apart from being pg of course) - if you have a look on Fertility Friend a lot of the anovulatory charts have very long cycles. If that does happen to be what it is, it may not be linked to your age or menopause though, again if you look at the anovulatory charts they are from women of all ages.

If it is that, I'm not sure why it happens, I'd guess it's just because for one reason or another your body just skips an ovulation now and then.

But I do hope there's a better explanation for your symptoms - good luck!

Original poster
grownupbabes · 05/11/2008 11:14

Just come back from dr - not encouraging... his view is HPTs are extremely accurate. But still took bloods for various hormones inc hcg plus thyroid. Most but not all results due Fri. Wait and see. But at least he agreed I did not have menopausal symptoms,so that is some hopeful news.

OP posts:
blinks · 05/11/2008 13:52

are you using ovulation prediction kits etc?

it not being menopausal is hopeful... could just be a random weird cycle. i had a bizarre cycle once when trying to conceive.

rainbowdays · 05/11/2008 20:14

grownupbabes - could be annovulatory cycle or illness delaying af or pregnancy!!!! Unfortunately it is a long wait til friday, and if thyroid comes back normal and no hcg in blood test - then you still have no answers. I can understand your frustration. If the blood test shows nothing it does not exclude the possibility of pregnancy, you would have to wait for another missed period but then you could push for a scan to be booked if no af has arrived.

I really hope that this is it for you, it is a long-shot, but still possible. Hey look at what is being said in USA today - anything is possible !!!!!

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