TTC#1 - Looking for Others in the Same Boat PART TWO THE SEQUEL WHERE WE ALL GET OUR BABIES???!

[MocktailMe]

www.mumsnet.com/talk/conception/5093665-ttc-1-no-previous-pregnancies-cycle-6-looking-for-others-in-the-same-boat?page=40&reply=144772936

Hi everyone!

I can't quite believe it but after a while year we only went and filled the last thread.

I'll tag you all below so that you can find me!

If anyone silently reading along wants to keep following - here's the place. If anyone wants to read the fertility journey for the last year have a look through the last thread.

@CharLdn fingers crossed that you’ll get some answers asap! And thanks for sharing your findings, always great to get more info on this crazy process.
As for me I’m doing fine. I’ve had a weird cycle as it’s my first real cycle post egg retrieval. I didn’t ovulate until CD 22 / 23 which is super late for me. I was tracking mainly so I can get a sense of when I will have my transfer (next cycle hopefully!). We did give it a go this cycle just as a last hail mary but I’m not expecting anything to happen. I’m only about 2 DPO so it will be a long wait now until my next cycle starts but that will hopefully be my transfer cycle 🤞

@CharLdn I'm terribly sorry love and echo everyone else's sentiments here. I can only imagine the different emotions you're feeling. I'm glad that you're counting all the positives and lessons learned about you and your body from this cycle but still saddened to hear that it ended in a chemical. I know both you and lavafield mentioned this but there is something seriously encouraging about knowing you're definitely capable of getting pregnant naturally.

Do you mind if I join you guys? I’m TTC my first, but have had 3 MCs. Second one was a partial molar, and most recent was genetically normal. I was diagnosed with pcos end of last year, and suspected APS syndrome.
This is my first cycle TTC since my last loss at the end of March.

I’m on metformin for the pcos which has helped with ovulation, as the cycle I got pregnant on I ovulated cd18. But the last cycle I just had I ovulated cd27. I’m now on cd17 with no signs of it coming. It’s getting me down a bit as I was hoping the metformin would give me more of a consistent ovulation date each month.

I’m sorry to read that there are others struggling too. I’m 2 years into the TTC journey now and struggle to comprehend sometimes that this has all happened

@Waitingformiracle Hey you never know! Its a bit cliche but it does seem like folks get those BFPs when they least expect it - and often right before IVF. Either way super excited that your transfer time is almost here!!

@Figtree11 Welcome!! Sorry to hear about your losses - we've had experiences that run the gambit in this group but mostly just try to check in and be encouraging. I'm not as familiar with the PCOS medications but hopefully they are able to work consistently for you to trigger an earlier ovulation. Do you use any at home testing to get an idea of when your ovulating or do you primarily rely on CM? No matter what though don't get too down on yourself PCOS cycles can be quite long so not ovulating early certainly doesn't mean you're out!

@PearOpal thank you, I’ve been on different threads in the past & found them so useful. Had a bit of time out but feel like I could do with support of others again, so thanks for having me.

I use the easy at home ovulation sticks, they’ve been pretty good for me with finding ovulation before. We had a bit of a break after the last MC, so guess im just impatient now that we have started TTC again! I’m hoping in the next week or so it will happen

@Figtree11 fingers crossed for you that the next week passes quickly.

Not much on my end - Based on my trackers/BBT I think I ovulated yesterday so heading into the roller coaster that is the TWW shortly. I use an inito monitor and I can say my levels are farrr stronger this cycle but unclear if that really means anyything - I guess I'll find out in time.

@MocktailMe how are you coming?

@lavafield sorry to hear about your anxieties throughout the pregnancy. Next week is 24 weeks which I'm sure you know is the point of viability. Hopefully reaching that massive milestone will ease your worries a little - although I know it must be so hard!

@CharLdn that's a good list of positive reflections for you - the one I relate to is 'knowing what it feels like to be pregnant'. Helpful, I think.

@Figtree11 welcome! I also have PCOS althought touch wood it's not toooo inconsistent. You can definitely ovulate late so don't worry but I get the frustration of waiting endlessly!

@Waitingformiracle next cycle is TRANSFER cycle 🙏🥰 not long to go at all for the next big step! Let us know once you get a date so we can all wait with you!

@PearOpal We started this cycle at the same time but I've lost track entirely of where I am now so I don't know if we are still aligned! I'm CD 16 but I don't know if I've ovulated. I haven't noticed any definitive EWCM it's been more watery. But honestly I haven't checked as much as usual. We started DTD on CD 6 and so far we have only missed CD 7 and CD 9. The aim is to keep this up until CD20 and maybe even beyond if I don't get definitive post ovulation signs.

I think this might be the most we have ever tried I hope it pays off and covers the right time!

I’m sorry to hear that @CharLdn but you seem to be taking on a good approach to it. There is definitely some positives to takeaway! But if you feel sad and upset that is also fine and allow yourself to feel that too.

Hope everyone else is doing okay! And good luck for the upcoming cycles 🥰 fingers crossed we get some positive tests and normal progression to healthy little babies!!

@lavafield hard relate to the anxiety, I’m 16w6d now and it doesn’t feel like there’s an end in sight for the worry. Scans help for a day or two but then back in the worry pit. We go on our baby moon next week and I really hope I can just switch off and enjoy it. I’m looking forward to some early morning beach yoga. I am getting a bump now which makes things feel a little more real but also then I struggle with the body image side of things so it’s a never ending battle 🤣 my gripe at the moment is I just look like I’m carrying a little more weight than usual it’s not obvious I’m pregnant just yet 🤣

@MocktailMe I get that completely but based on that schedule I'm guessing no matter when you ovulate you'll have your basis covered ;). Rooting for you no matter what schedule you're on! I'll be honest I can't really tell the difference between EWCM and watery, it all seems watery to me but BBT and OPKs tell me I'm ovulating so I haven't dug into it too much. Fingers crossed that this more handsoff approach will make this month your month!

Thank you ladies, you really helped me quieten my pregnancy anxiety a bit. Yes, next week is 24 weeks which is a threshold of viability, so I hope I start worrying a bit less.
@KT199 Hope you enjoy your babymoon and it will help switch off your worries.
Good luck to everyone in their ovulation or TWW windows. I did often have watery discharge rather than EWCM during or just before the ovulation, which is still a very much fertile mucus, yay!
I hope we will soon see more good news here! ✨
@Waitingformiracle Your transfer is not too far out now but good that you gave it your best shot this month too!
A lot of this is so random, as I mentioned in the previous thread I got pregnant DTD just once that month, and a day before positive OPK at that, so did not have high hopes for that month. But of course for maximised chances and peace of mind knowing you did your best, every day or every other day is perfect!

Thank you ladies.

Enjoy the baby moon @KT199 you deserve some relaxing time! Also, I know sooo many women who think they only look heavier not pregnant and they don't at all look heavier - usually they either look pregnant or the same! We are our biggest critics remember.

I've actually this evening checked and spotted the mythical EWCM 😂😂 actually stretchy!!! So I'm REALLY hoping today is ovulation day as if so I've got 7 solid days in a row of trying behind me. We will try again tomorrow morning before my partner goes away for the night and then hopefully Sunday evening too. Throwing the absolute kitchen sink at it. I wish it could be easier - why can't a little timer countdown appear on the sole of our feet or something??? Would that really be any crazier than what actually happens 😂

So sorry to hear this @CharLdn, it's cruel that it can end like that after taking so long in the first place. It sounds like you have a very pragmatic mindset which is good, make sure to look after yourself too. From another self employed person, it does get tricky when you need to take some time out for yourself! Sometimes when I'm feeling burned out and can't afford a whole day off I work extra hard in the morning and take the whole afternoon to do whatever I want, that can help.

@KT199 I hope you have a lovely time on your baby moon! A different setting and slower pace might be just what you need.

@MocktailMe you must be exhausted! At least this month you definitely don't have to worry about timing it wrong! I tend to get the EWCM a few days before ovulating, then the day it dries up is usually when I get my LH peak.

Nothing much to update on my end, I think I'm at the start of my fertile window and I'm hoping I ovulate on the normal day this month as I have my day 21 bloods booked for exactly a week after I'm due to ovulate. Had to book it again after my cycle messed it up last time and I think my doctors are starting to get fed up with me 😂

@lavafield / @KT199 can see how anxiety can take over as it’s a long nine months! I’ve fully convinced myself that I did weights in the morning and ate a Parma ham croissant the day I started spotting which could be related!

@MocktailMe honestly I can’t believe you do it everyday - it’s a lot of effort!

@Tater05 I think now I’m not preggo I need to bank up some marketing stuff I can push out if I’m having off weeks.

Half days are definitely good for afternoon naps!

Good you’re getting more tests - my GP also think I’m a massive Karen but they always give me what I want…

From my end I had my scan yesterday - nothing really showed and I’ve kind of got a light period going on now… So I definitely think it’s a miscarriage. I’ve got hcgs and an nhs scan booked on Tuesday.

I’ve dished out all my preconception supplements again into my pill box which I found weirdly soothing and once I’ve stopped bleeding I think I’ll go back on Mira to track ovulation.

Thank you for all your kind words ❤️

@Tater05 let those doctors get annoyed...you have to push for what you need and never forget it's a service we all pay for and are entitled to use! Sadly you have to be quite vocal to get the stuff you need I wish it wasn't the case.

What DPO are you now?

@CharLdn I really want you to know and believe that lifting weight and Parma ham did not cause this. At this stage in pregnancy it is almost certainly due to unfortunately an embryo that wasn't healthy or normal and couldn't continue growing. You are a fit active person who usually lifts weights - continuing a normal routine into pregnancy is absolutely fine unless told otherwise by a doctor, and that would generally be down the line if you were having complications. This is not your fault. At all. You did nothing wrong and actually you've done a lot of things right over the TTC journey. You could not have prevented this.

I'm glad you're having bloods done as obviously from the experiences myself and @KT199 had it is certainly important to check that everything is finished and I do hope that's the case for you.

I think looking to get something in place for work will help as you never know what time you might need off with TTC. I will say though that depending on the employer being employed isn't perfect - I don't get sick pay. Admittedly SSP is better than nothing at all, but for one week off only it's £67 then £118 per week after which isn't enough at all. I was prepared for a financial dip for maternity, but the lost earnings from prenancy loss is something I'd never considered and it's racked up a fair amount 😫

@MocktailMe its weirdly been a bit of a reality check on work as I’ve been so tired all week so definitely worth thinking about what I can do.

At the moment I’m coaching two days a week where I have to be ‘on’ and one workshop a month so it feels OK. But I definitely think it’s worth thinking about a back up plan in place.

I don’t really blame myself I’m just seeing it as a crappy part of the journey and I do think the baby I’m meant to have will be able to cope with a bit of lighter weightlifting and one parma ham croissant!

I definitely have lost earnings in this journey as a self employed person I just can’t put 100% energy into work - but I think it’s SO important to be kind to ourselves.

I’m going to go to the library today so I can try and lose myself in some good trashy books for summer, and I’m booking two weeks in Greece in September to look forward to ❤️

Yes I agree be gentle with yourself.

A holiday is always a great thing to have to look forward to! I've just had a couple days on the east coast seaside and we have a week in the Highlands booked for later in the year. I think having something non-baby related to look forward to is so important!

I'm now on CD18 and I've still got EWCM - honestly I'm so over it 😫 I had really hoped I'd ovulated yesterday, and it is still possible that I did, but we've done today too in case I didn't, and will probably go again tomorrow unless this CM dries up.

@CharLdn Absolutely there is nothing you have done or not done to have a chemical. Such early miscarriages are always due to some fault with the embryo. It is still a loss to you, and all the feelings are totally understandable, so be gentle with yourself! I am glad you have a holiday in Greece booked!! After the first day or two of worries I finally relaxed and enjoyed mine. It is totally a good thing to distract yourself from all-consuming baby-related worries!!
@MocktailMe Glad to hear you have some nice time off planned too, something to look forward to!
I think it often happens that EWCM lasts 5-7 days even, so at least all those days are fertile and a good sign for you! Fingers crossed! 🤞

Yes don't get me wrong @lavafield id rather have the EWCM knowing it's there to do it's job than have none and be stressing im having an anovulatory cycle! I'm just impatient to start my 2WW. It's still in full flow so if this is peak EWCM then ovulation is likely tomorrow. Which is fine - we've obviously covered every day anyway and will do tomorrow morning but I'm honestly ready to rest and wait it out now and have the pressure off.

I might feel very differently about that when I'm crazily symptom spotting in 7 days time of course 😂😂😂

Hello team how are we all?

I've been tracking CM and it seems like I'm around 2DPO now. Entering the calmest week of my cycle - too early to test, too late to try! I'm very confident I've caught ovulation this time as saw my EWCM arrive, linger, peak and disappear. All in all we DTD 10 days straight so I certainly deserve a BFP...but that's not how it works!

Where are you guys at now?

I am genuinely impressed at your 10 day streak! You've put a lot of work into this cycle, let's hope it brings the results! That's definitely the calmest week of my cycle too, any twinge you feel at this point has nothing to do with it and it's generally easier not to overthink too much.

I'm on CD18 and still haven't had my peak... I'd usually ovulate today or tomorrow so maybe it's coming a day later this cycle. I've had a bit of CM but not as much as I usually get. We should have covered at least 3 days of the window either way. I'm just glad the weather cooled down for my fertile window and it's getting hot again when we don't have to touch each other 😂

We are only one day apart as I'm on CD19 - we will be testing around the same time and I'll have my fingers crossed for both of us!

3 days is plenty I know I've been totally OTT - it just stems from the fear of mistiming - not because I believe that many times is necessary.

My first ectopic pregnancy was conceived by only one try in the fertile period - I'd totally mistimed it so we actually only did it once when it mattered.

So true - I've got lots of luteal phase symptoms at the moment - breakout on my chin, lethargic, heavy boobs feeling, but I know all of that simply means rising progesterone and sinking estrogen! I'm tracking the symptoms in my app but cross referencing easily shows me all of this is typical every time no matter what. In only a day or two you can join me in the week of peace!

@MocktailMe hey! I’m doing good. On CD28 but I ovulated super late this cycle so I’m only 6DPO. Sounds like you have put in a lot of work this cycle, fingers crossed for you and you too @Tater05!! I totally agree about the weather cooling down, it’s hard trying to have sex in that heat 🤣🤣

@MocktailMe I had my miscarriage confirmed by bloods today so I’m back on the TTC train!

They’ve told me to not try this month because if I do get pregnant it’s hard to track dates. But I think we’re just going to give it a go anyway as I have seen anecdotally that post miscarriage and hycosy you can have increased fertility.

Also because it took so long last time I do want to give it a red hot go and not waste anytime - I’m 36 and just feel like I’m not getting any younger.

I’m going to use Mira again to track LH but tbh last time my CM was the thing which told me the most info so I’ll track that plus BBT to get an idea.

We’re on holiday next week so I think just try and relax and find some joy in it again?!!

@MocktailMe We never manage more than 3 days in the window anyway, we struggle to get 2 days in a row which is why I'm so impressed at your 10! It does only take one well timed go, but you've definitely covered that so fingers crossed for us both!

@CharLdn Welcome back aboard, hopefully you're not on it much longer. I feel like it's strange for them to have advised you that? If it were me I'd also be ignoring them, loads of people get pregnant without knowing their cycle at all (wouldn't that be nice 😅) and I'm sure they manage fine. Especially as you're still post recent hycosy, I wouldn't want to waste that opportunity just because of working out dates.
I trust my CM over LH strips at this point as well, definitely worth tracking what you can though. Sounds like the perfect timing to be going on holiday, really hope you get to switch off and just enjoy yourselves!

@CharLdn welcome back. I totally agree with just trying. It almost sounds like they’re advising you to wait for their own convenience vice any medical reason. Glad your timing is working out to give it a go so quickly!