TTC#1 - Looking for Others in the Same Boat PART TWO THE SEQUEL WHERE WE ALL GET OUR BABIES???!

[MocktailMe]

www.mumsnet.com/talk/conception/5093665-ttc-1-no-previous-pregnancies-cycle-6-looking-for-others-in-the-same-boat?page=40&reply=144772936

Hi everyone!

I can't quite believe it but after a while year we only went and filled the last thread.

I'll tag you all below so that you can find me!

If anyone silently reading along wants to keep following - here's the place. If anyone wants to read the fertility journey for the last year have a look through the last thread.

@MocktailMe glad things are moving forward ❤️ If you want any ivf podcast tips I have found BFN very helpful.

I’m popping up - still on holiday two weeks away has been divine and the gym retreat I’m on has been all about reconnecting with ourselves and trusting our bodies which is great.

Also lots of girlie time and belly laughs which have been good for the soul. I’m cycle day 14 when I get back - not sure if I’ve ovulated yet and I’m not sure I care (!)

How are we doing ladies? Anyone in TWW or sex week?

I’m CD 19 - my temp is still not risen so trying to have sex every other day still in case I’ve not ovulated yet. My poor husband is entirely over it.

We’ve managed to do day 8/14/15/17 and we’re going to try either today or tomorrow.

Mentally post holiday I’m feeling much better and very much less attached to the outcome than I have been previously.

I’m kind of viewing the next few cycles as getting us through to Xmas - try and have as much fun as possible and plan some things to enjoy between now and then.

I’ve also stopped obsessing over food/alcohol and am trying to just take my vitamins and shag enough to hopefully give us a chance.

I think TTC needs to become much less of a mental focus for me - so trying to focus on work/life more!

Hey char :)

We actually haven't tried this cycle - although I haven't ovulated yet anyway. I'm waiting to find out if I'm starting long protocol this cycle or next. If im starting this cycle then we shouldn't try. If it's next we can, but I might not know in time! Either way, if I'm not trying this cycle that is okay - I know I'll be starting the drugs for egg collection next cycle so I'm a bit on the fence anyway - I wouldn't mind the mental break before beginning. Easy to say pre-ovulation though!!!!!! See how I feel in a few days 😅😅

I'm glad you enjoyed your holiday! A good state of mind is the first step I think, your wellbeing has to come first. It's good to have some things booked in. It's a bit hard at the moment as we have had to cancel a break we had planned as we can't be sure if it will interfere with the egg collection, and we can't really plan anything right now! So absolutely take all the breaks and make all the plans now!!

Hi ladies nice to her from you.

I am ok over here, had a couple of complications post birth so physical recovery has been hard! Little man is 5 weeks old now and is very much ruling the manor lol

I'm sorry to hear you've been in pain :(

Have you been able to get out and about much five weeks on or are you home and resting when you can? Would love to hear about what your newborn normal weeks have been like ☺️

@MocktailMe yes I’ve been out and about, I’ve had to have 2 rounds of antibiotics. I had an infection x2 from my episiotomy. So I’m now under a midwife who specialises in perineal trauma (who knew that was a thing)

In a nutshell my weeks have been breastfeeding, sleep deprivation and a lot of washing 😂 it’s definitely been life changing…I don’t think you can ever prepare for it x

Bless you, I had a friend with a big tear down there, she said a warm but not hot bath was the only real comfort she found but had to wait several weeks before she could!

Your washing machine must be working overtime! It does sound an absolute whirlwind I hope the infections are gone for good soon!

@KTB34 thanks for your detailed and honest review of the first weeks with a newborn! 😆
I am waiting for the hospital to give me the date of my elective C-section at 39 weeks (in two weeks' time, yay!) as my consultants advised that I should deliver at 39 weeks. I rejected induction due to a high risk of escalation to instrumental delivery and then an emergency section, in my age group in particular. If the little man is born before that naturally, great, if not, I have a smooth pathway to a planned section. The baby is on the 90th percentile too, so think that would be safer for all.

@MocktailMe sounds like you have a plan and your IVF treatment is around the corner!!

@CharLdn That's the best approach, trying to live your life to the fullest and see what happens in coming months. As I often said, we conceived when least expected in a cycle with the least attempts and lots of travel! 😂

@MocktailMe the physical side of recovery has not been fun, I’m hoping it will all heal soon ! How are you getting on?

@lavafield if anyone tells you labour is not painful they are lying to you! I will be honest 😂 my biggest advice for surviving the first couple of weeks have no expectations about sleep and always make sure to eat and drink (especially if you’re planning on breastfeeding).

@MocktailMe do you know if you’re starting this cycle yet?

@PearOpal how are you getting on

I’m cycle day 23 trying not to symptom spot but I’ve been exhausted for the past few days…

Hey @CharLdn been thinking about you! I hope that tiredness means something....

We won't be able to start the down reg drugs this cycle unfortunately, I can't get an appointment in time. It has to be before CD21 I'm currently on CD19 and my appointment is next week! Which means I should be starting NEXT CD21 - so literally just a month away I can't believe it.

We will be doing long protocol so I'll be taking drugs next cycle from CD21 which put you in chemical menopause to let the ovaries go calm. I'll do injections daily for that for around 2-3 weeks. Once they feel my ovaries are ready I'll switch to the stim injections for a further 2 weeks and then it's the egg retrieval.

So, assuming I start the 'down regulation' phase around mid November, I should be having my first fresh transfer just around Christmas.

We have still tried this cycle as it's the last one we can for a good while - I ovulated a couple of days ago. I genuinely don't believe for 5 seconds that this cycle will work of course, but why not give it a go.

@MocktailMe glad you’ve got a firm timeline in place after so much waiting!

🤞 for this cycle but onwards with the plan if not.

I’m keeping my fingers crossed and trying not to read too much into things…

Hi ladies

Oh my gosh this app drives me crazy sometimes, I just typed out such a long reply and I lost it. So here is take #2.

@MocktailMe So glad to hear you have a plan and timeline in place and that you’ll still get your transfer in pre-Christmas like you hoped for! If you have any questions about the IVF or if I can help at all I am always here ❤️ I know we’d obviously rather not have to go down this route but I did find it quite exciting when we had a plan in motion so I hope you are feeling some of that too.

@CharLdn fingers crossed for you this cycle! Your symptoms sound promising. Will you test or wait for your period to (hopefully not) arrive? Your holiday sounds so dreamy and just what the doctor ordered, and so glad to read that you are in such a good headspace about it all. I think not obsessing about every little thing we do and eat is the best way to be, I know I got to that place mentally eventually too and it was so liberating.

@KTB34 I’m so sorry to hear you’ve been in so much pain! And thanks for the honest review of the newborn trenches 😅 good for us all to know the realities! I hope things ease up for you soon and hope baby is doing really well!

@lavafield So exciting that your delivery date is just around the corner, whether the little guy comes himself or you have a section. Inductions don’t sound fun so I totally get why you wouldn’t want one. Will be so excited to hear when he’s arrived! Best of luck 💙

@Waitingformiracle thank you! I’m generally feeling way less obsessive :) I’ll only test if my temps still up on the weekend.

How are you doing?

Keep us posted!! 🤞

I’m doing good! Definitely starting to feel a bit better. I’m 12 weeks so hoping things will improve even more over the next few weeks. We’ve had a small scare with our harmony test but it’s looking like all is probably fine, but it’s been quite stressful. Just trying to stay positive and hope for the best!

Yay the 12 week mark! That's absolutely amazing and I'm so thrilled for you.

Can I ask did you do long or short protocol? You may have said but I can't remember now. I'm feeling really apprehensive about 5 weeks of injections but sure once I'm in the swing of things it will be okay.

We are doing a package with 4 cycles included and unlimited frozen transfers so we really are throwing the kitchen sink at this. Daunting to think if it takes a while I could be doing FOUR cycles of 5 weeks of injections!!!! But overall I'm starting to think I was mad not to have jumped to this a year ago and potentially saved myself the hell of the losses.

Obviously I'm so hopeful that I will take on the first fresh transfer this Christmas but trying to really manage my expectations - we are prepared for it to take longer hence why we paid for this package. Will be a waste of money if it works first time but it will be the best money I ever wasted 😅

Generally quite nervous about managing work etc but it will be what it will be - if I need to take a bit of time off because I feel rough, so be it. It's hard to know what to expect.

@MocktailMe I did a short protocol so I’m not too familiar with the longer one but I know a friend in work is doing the long protocol. I have however been doing injections for the last 12 weeks and only stopping this week so I understand how gruelling it can be. I certainly found some days so hard to build up the will to take the shot but in general I will say you do just get used to it and get on with it! It becomes a part of your morning / evening routine. I got my husband to do mine if he was there which made it a bit easier. I found warming up the area first helped a lot and if I did that I usually didn’t feel a thing! That package sounds really great, hopefully you won’t need it all but good to have the option! I felt the same way about IVF once I started I was like why didn’t I do this sooner. I think you’re right to keep your expectations about timing managed because there can always be obstacles and unexpected delays but fingers crossed you’ll get your transfer around Christmas ❤️

Work wise I found I was generally fine during the stims, although everyone reacts differently of course. I took a few days off for my egg retrieval and I actually took a week off for my transfer so I could just chill and not be stressed!

Honestly 12 weeks you are literally amazing. Seriously amazing!!!

Thanks for the warming the area tip! I'm thinking I will do them first thing in the morning to get it over with - and can use a hot water bottle first!

Yeah honestly I'm trying so hard not to get too attached to this idea of a positive test for new year. Obviously it would be a dream come true. But not only might there be a delay, it also might not work first time. There's so many steps before that! I'm terrified I'll end up one of the people who have no eggs retrieved! Or no embryos make it to day 5. Or something! So many worries, but knowing I've got four full cycles (and as many FETs as we can - depending if we get more than one embryo per cycle!) is my main reassurance. I'm already starting out on the max doses of medication too, so we aren't going in easy or gentle to start.

Obviously the ultimate dream is 3 day 5 embryos first fresh transfer works and I can have siblings later....that's the big dream but Im trying not to get too hung up 😅😅😅

@CharLdn how is it going, is it still too early to test....?

Thank you @MocktailMe it’s certainly been a marathon but proud of myself for surviving it! I suppose that was one thing I wasn’t prepared for was if doing a fully medicated transfer cycle and getting a positive test that you stay on the drugs for so long.

I think you definitely have the right attitude about your expectations and I completely understand the fear of each stage not working. I was so surprised when I learned that we only ended up with one embryo but sometimes it only takes one! But I know my dream would have been to have a few that we could freeze and have our little family from one retrieval but I know we can go back and do it again. It’s so so great to have the reassurance of all of those cycles as back ups so you can feel really reassured ❤️

@MocktailMe remember this isn’t your first rodeo with waiting so hopefully you’ve been somewhat trained mentally!

I’m not testing and feeling relatively chilled and not depressed! Which is a new experience for me.

I’m just going to keep taking my temperature as that seems to tell me the most - I only ovulated on day 17 so I think my period could be a bit later anyway. My latest focus has been trying to eat to support progesterone so I’ve been resting more and eating lots of veggies - which I think regardless of the outcome is a good idea.

Mentally this cycles been much less stressful which has been nice even if I’m not preggo.

Exactly @Waitingformiracle I remember it being such an agonising time for you and only getting the one...and it turned out to be the very one you needed!! Honestly, if we get one baby from this I'm not sure we will ever do it again as it's cost us so much (not just money obviously), but the door doesn't have to be closed. No matter the outcome. We are so very blessed to live in a time when IVF exists.

@CharLdn you are so right - the last two years have been an excersise in patience! I can wait another month to start, I've already waited 24 😅😅

Temping is a good plan, it certainly seems less crazy inducing then repeated tests and symptom spotting!! It was bang on last time too. I really hope your time will come soon. I do think your plan to eat well and look after yourself is a good one no matter what.

I have to say after two years of TTC/pregnancy/recovery my self-care has never been so good. It's a shame it's taken this hell for me to get here, but these days I unashamedly look after myself like a dedicated project! Sleep, rest, exercise, food, work, social obligations - I've got really good at balancing things to prioritise my well-being and not burnout and get too stressed. I think this will only benefit me through IVF, pregnancy and God-willing, the early years with a child. If eating well, getting your steps in, resting and drinking water makes me feel good without dealing with those things, I can only imagine it could really make a difference when they are added to the mix and things get harder!

Love your prioritising your emotional, mental and physical wellbeing in the gruelling TTC process ladies!!
@MocktailMe Your IVF process is around the corner! A long protocol sounds more demanding but you've got this! I personally know more people who conceived via IVF than spontaneously in recent years, quite a few from the very first try! So many people go through this, and isn't it great this option is available?!

@Waitingformiracle Hope your 12 week scan will further reassure you! We still went for the NT NHS scan at 13 weeks even after getting great results on NIPT, and to be honest at each subsequent scan (I have growth scans every two weeks) they still check that nasal bone to be reassured..

Thanks @lavafieldwe had a good 12 week scan with low NT, nasal bone identified and measuring a few days ahead so I’m hoping that these are all good signs 🙏

@MocktailMe ive gone from chilled to not so chilled today lol.

my temps still up CD26 - so I’m in the danger zone of hope which has turned me obsessive again.

I did a comparative graph of 4 months of temperatures today before I started work using excel…

Patience is officially dwindling! I’m hoping crochet and celebrity traitors can get me through.