Anyone else trying to get pregnant 2

[bayleaf]

It may just be my computer ( no broad band in the sticks!)but the other thread was taking a long while to load and accept new messages so maybe we can start again here...

No Bayleaf, it's not just your computer, mine takes ages to add a message on the other thread too so good idea starting a new one. We can't get broadband here either. Wills, sorry to hear about your stresses. Hope life calms down a bit in the very near future.

WWW & Bayleaf. Thanks. Still spotting and still attempting to "remain calm". Took dd to London Zoo today and went at least 3/4s of the day without rushing off to "see". Feeling pretty stupid

How are you doing Wills? You certainly shouldn't be feeling stupid - anyone would have reacted exactly as you have. Hope you managed to get a good night's sleep and are feeling a bit better and more able to cope with it all.

Could not agree more with Bayleaf - spotting is always scary, no matter how slight and how many people tell you they had it too. Well, I did slightly around weeks 7-10 for both pregnancies, and, OK, so one ended badly later on, but I am SURE that was not connected to the spotting.
Hope you are having a better day today, Wills.

hello wills, i am one of those people who had bleeding in early pregnancy and it all ended happily for me. agree with bayleaf and marina - it's obviously worrying so no need to feel stupid.

here's hoping it all works out well for you and wishing you a merry christmas

ps - sorry if you have mentioned this on the other thread, but have you gone for an early scan? best wishes, bk

Did a test this morning but negative. However last cycle was 47 days and tested on day 39, so maybe just jumping the gun. When you don't want to get pregnant, 47 day cycle is great but when you are, it's a nightmare! Good luck to all the testers over the festive time and to all those that are pregnant already. Merry Christmas.

Well I'm back again. Thought I was getting my period on Boxing Day but just small amount of spotting. Still nothing more today. So I guess I'm still keeping my fingers crossed that period won't come completely and that when I test again it might be a positive. Hope everyone had a great Christmas.

Thanks CookieMonster - I'm replying on a different thread as my computer plays up when trying to reply on long threads - it just refuses to load basically. I'm on day 15 of down reg now - my scan is next tuesday - and hopefully it's all going OK - I certainly have felt OK and remarkably managed to get thru the festive season without too many of the expected comments. ( helped, sadly, by the fact that SIL had an early miscarriage just a couple of days before xmas so everyone was concentrating on her)
I'm cross with myself as I've managed to put on 7lbs since the beginning of December and feel very portly again - but I'm currently in the middle of making a large vat of the vegetable curry that I use as a staple meal when 'dieting' these days to sort myself out with some healthy eating ( I don't want to diet properly in the circumstances)before the injecting starts.
Elliot- Have you started Down reg yet?

Hi there - thanks Cookiemonster and bayleaf for asking. I'm not due to start down regging for a few weeks yet- the drugs arrive tomorrow! Am feeling really ok about it all - I guess because I haven't really started to feel 'desperate' to have another baby. A few people are asking what our plans for no 2 are so I just tell them. Trying to keep the dates a bit vague though!
Bayleaf - hope scan goes well.

Hi
Have just had my down reg' scan and am officially 'menopausal' ( that's good BTW for those of you who aren't into the ivf regime!) so can start injecting tonight probably - just have to wait for the phone call to say that the blood test result is the same of the scan.
Am glad I've got that part over with as yesterday I was feeling a bit down - at least now I'm on the 'positive' part of it

bayleaf, glad you're feeling positive today. Glad also that you explained menpausal = good, wouldn't have known that! I'm hoping I'm not pregnant really since a) we're broke, see other thread and b) have had a horrendously unhealthy Christmas eating cr*p, drinking etc etc. Good luck to everyone trying.

Good news about the scan bayleaf. I remember once I got onto the injectables it all seemed to go much quicker so I hope it feels like that for you.

Bayleaf,
pleased to hear you got the right results from your scan. I always felt as if the end was in sight once I started injecting. Do you do it yourself? For my first couple of cycles I had one of those 'gun' type things that I could use myself in the front of my thigh, but then the drugs changed and it had to go into my bum so I couldn't do it myself. Dh hates needles and blood (won't watch Casualty or Animal Hospital!) but he forced himself to do it for me ... bless.
Anyway, good luck with it all .. CM

Thanks all -
WWW now you've said that you are BOUND to be pregnant this month!
Yes I really feel that the end is in sight now - and the timings are quite predictable as it's the second time so I can plan my life a bit - up until now it's felt like EVERYTHING is on hold.
Cookie - I inject myself with a 'pen' too - I found it really easy last time , it stings for a few seconds but is not a big deal. IT cost a bit more to have menopure that could be injected like that rather than the intramuscular ones but as dh flatly refused to do it ( not sure what his excuse was !)I decided it was money well spent.

Besides - thanks to WWW I'm £8 richer today - I sold a book on amazon within 24 hours!!!! ( see money saving thread!) just a shame that I'd need to sell a bleedin' library to pay for an ivf/icsi cycle!

Had my first scan since the stimulation started yesterday and there are 11 eggs - (or at least potentially 11, there isn't always an egg in each follicle)which is 2 less then last time - but still plenty so I'm feeling quite positive - but VERY VERY tired - egg collection is likely to be Sunday but I'll know more tomorrow when I have another scan.

that sounds great, bayleaf. Are you working at the moment? hope you are able to get some rest. My clinic advises taking the whole week of egg collection off, but otherwise I'll be working as normal (3.5 days).

I work 3 days a week - so I'll take the 3 that follow et off and work the week after that - having dd in nursery and being able to rest at home will be great - last time I had to take time off work for ec and et so didn't take the following week off too ( work don't know ( apart from one colleague) and I've no intention of telling them)and I still picked up dd as and when I had to - this time I'm doing EVERYTHING I can to avoid it even down to telling nursery I've hurt my back and could one of them lift her into the car!

Bayleaf,
11 eggs (potentially) sounds great! I never had that many even in the beginning. Will you freeze some if you get the chance? Hope today's scan looks good too.
Best wishes .... CM

Bayleaf - good news - fingers crossed for you!

Can I have a rant please..? Just been to see my GP, as my hospital dr has confirmed diagnosis of PCOS and I'm starting Metformin today. Hospital doc said to try conceiving for 3 cycles, and then if no luck, to ask for a referral to a fertility clinic to start Clomid.

GP today says she's not sure she can do this, as technically speaking I already have 1 child (dp had him) and fertility treatment isn't available to women who already have a child. I'm devastated, as I'm sure the Metformin won't work miracles and I'll need more help. I want to avoid a 'gay' rant 'cos I'm not the ranting kind, but it seems pretty ironic that when we don't have equity in many other areas of our lives, this is chosen as a potential area where they might choose to promote equaility.

So is this true - can you not get Clomid if you already have a child? Still can't believe this would apply as I haven't actually 'had' a baby....

V. miserable - need Mumsnet support...

Hi dot1. I'm really sorry you've had a disappointment about the clomid funding, and I can understand that it seems unfair. Presumably you can still have the treatment if you go private? Clomid treatment is not that expensive (the scans are the main cost).

Some information: the eligibility for NHS funded fertility treatment is determined locally by the Primary Care Trust (formerly the local Health Authority - these were replaced by primary care trusts in April). The precise rules vary greatly from place to place. In many places there is virtually no NHS provision at all, in other places it is relatively generous.

However,I don't think any area provides NHS funded fertility treatment for people who already have a previous child. Now of course in your situation it is the definition of 'previous child' which is the key. It may (or may not) make you feel better to know that in my area, I'm pretty sure that the definition includes any child to either partner who is living with them. So for example if DH had a child who was living with us, I would not have been eligible for any NHS treatment, even though I had not actually had a child of my own.

I suggest that you contact your local Primary Care Trust and ask for a copy of their eligibility criteria for NHS fertility treatment. Then you can see whether it looks like you have grounds to request NHS funding - it may well be that they haven't had to consider people in your situation before, and that may give you the opportunity to put your case forward to be considered as any other childless woman, rather than as the partner to someone who already has a child (IYSWIM). Its a grey area and therefore worth arguing the case - but you need to know the details of the 'rules' in your area.
I'd also discuss this with your GP (who you've said is sympathetic) and tell her that you'd like to read the eligibility criteria and possibly challenge the decision that you are not eligible. She is probably just trying to implement the criteria as she understands them.

There are many many ways in which access to fertility treatments is unfair, and you've fallen foul of one of them. Hope this gives you some information to try and do something about it!

oh, just to clarify - it is the primary care trust who would be responsible for funding any treatment, and making the decision - not the GP - so that's who you need to take it up with. But if you can get your GP 'on side' that would help.
Best of luck.

thanks Elliot - that's really useful info and I'll see if I can get the guidelines from the PCT.

Also doesn't seem fair if it applies to a woman whose husband's children live with them....

Ho hum. I need to find out about costs aswell - I'd just assumed it would be outrageously expensive, and we haven't got a lot of money, but if it's not too much that would be an option.

Thanks again - good to get some advice as I only saw the GP this morning so am still a bit rattled!

Well, I suppose it depends on what you'd call 'outrageously expensive'!! My full IVF treatment costs a little over £3000 per cycle. I would imagin that clomid treatment with scans wouldn't be more than £1000, but it would depend for example on whether that included insemination. I've got a price list for my clinic and will see if I can find something relevant to give you an idea. OK, that's not cheap, but it is comparable to what one might spend on a major purchase like a car or holiday abroad, or a new kitchen for example. And I'd willingly go without any of those for another child!! That's how I look at it anyway!

do you mean £1,000 per cycle? (gulp) This feels v. expensive - dp and I both work, but live in London renting a house and we're not on the poverty line or anything, but we just get by each month with not much over... £1,000 per month would be out of the question.

I'm still flabbergasted at how little you are entitled to on the NHS - I must be very naive - I just haven't thought (or had to think) about it until now.

I suppose there is hope the Metformin will work, and I know I'm lucky not to have anything more seriously wrong.

Ho hum..!

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news...I suppose I am used to the costs as I have known for a while that's what we'll need to do if we are to have another baby, so to me the 'lower' costs of DI seem quite reasonable!! We certainly won't be able to afford more than 2 or perhaps 3 IVF attempts.
£1000 was just a very rough guess - erring on the high side as I didn't want to give you an unrealistic expectation - it might actually be a lot less than this. If you look at the hfea website you might find some clinic details/costs.

Yes, its all a bit of a tiresome and expensive treadmill....but perhaps the metformin will do its stuff for you.