Anyone else trying to get pregnant 2

[bayleaf]

It may just be my computer ( no broad band in the sticks!)but the other thread was taking a long while to load and accept new messages so maybe we can start again here...

bayleaf, I've been away for a few days, but just logged back on to let you know I'm thinking of you. Did you try a test yet? Always tricky to know whether to test at the earliest possible moment or wait until its more likely to be conclusive.
Let us know how you are..

Well, I had a scan on Friday and found out I'm ovulating from my right ovary (again) - which was bad news because I've only got one fallopian tube - on the left side. Apparently it could still work even if I ovulate on the "wrong" side, but the chance is reduced, so we decided not to go ahead. I'm disapointed, rather than heartbroken - there's always next month. Still, it wasn't the best weekend for me to find out that 2 of my friends are pregnant. I really am genuinely pleased for them, but...

Anyway, Janinlondon, we're being treated by CARE at the Three Shires Hospital in Northampton. Like you, I usually ovulate fine on my own, so don't really see the point of clomid, but we have used it in the past, and I can see us trying it again, because it ups the chances - I had 2 follicles last time we used it, and the hope is that at least one will be on the left side (unfortunately both were on the right last time). Also, I got a bit worried about the idea of twins, as we already have a 2 year old. As far as Profasi goes, I'm not sure if it would help your weekend problem (I think our clinic does Sat. mornings though). As I understand it, they aren't really trying to change the time I ovulate. They use scans and blood tests to predict when it will naturally occur and then use the Profasi just to make extra sure.

Thanks Jane101. Clomid is not an option for me. My lining went way down on it. And injectibles are a nightmare because no matter how low a dose they give me I get OHSS and end up in hospital. And there's always one follicle WAAY out in front and they have to decide to either go with it or let it fly and wait for the others. So a drugless regimen seems the only way. I wish I could find the right protocol! Good luck with the LH ovary - maybe next month?

Hi all
Firstly can I apologise Jane101 for calling you Janeway further down the board? - I'm not sure how /why I did that - I only just noticed now and thought how wierd it was.
Unfortunately I'm not the bearer of glad tidings -tho the smiley is not a mistake as I'm feeling fine now. I've waited a couple of days to post until I am through the worst of the self pity and frustration. I've realised from Friday onwards that it hadn't worked - that was day 12 post transfer and most ivfers seem to ahve a positive by then if they are going to get one - so over the weekend I gradually came to terms with it not having worked again. I had a good cry, ate a LOAD of chocolate ( and a whole M&S pecan toffee tart!) and by Sunday afternoon I was feeling much better (and not a little fatter!)and more positive about it all.
I know myself well enough to know that allowing myself to wallow is NOT good for me and I need to concentrate hard on the good things in my life, things where I feel blessed, and to look to the future and find out what I can do to make it work next time!
I've got an appointment to see the Dr on Friday and will discuss a frozen cycle in March ( he's away this month) as we've got 13 embryos frozen now and a frozen transfer is only about £850. (£7,000 in to treatment you start to think 'ooch!'

Elliott - how are you feeling - you must be nearly there now? Any side effects?
Jane101 - I can imagine how frustating is is to have to cancel again - I'm finding it hard to see a positive side to the fact that I have to wait till March to carry on, I feel as though. I can cope with however long it takes as long as I can keep going - it's the treading water in between that drives me mad.

I've been this morning to do the official pregnancy test and bizarrely whilst sitting waiting two friends walked in! They're peope we only see about once a year - and I knew they'd had fertility problems and presumed by now they had given up ( they're 40) but it turns out as the problem is a sperm one they had been told 10 years ago there was no hope - but in the light of improvements in icsi they'd decided to give it one last go - it feels like a really small world!

bayleaf, you deserve a medal.

I so hope the March meeting and frozen embryo method leads to a baby for you. Sorry I can't talk about this in a more informed way, since I know so little about it, I know it's not just about science, it's also about your feelings.

Take lots of care
tigermoth X

Bayleaf,
I have been thinking about you over the last couple of days and wondering if your absence meant the news wasn't good .... I am SO sorry to hear that confirmed but I think your positive attitude is fantastic. OK, so you wallowed for a short while, but you are quite entitled to that and you sound so upbeat now.
It's unfortunate that you have wait till March when you are in a position to get straight into frozen embryo transfer this month (if your consultant is anything like mine was, he's away in foreign parts on some freebie conference!) but just use the time in between to strengthen your resolve that it WILL work ...
Best wishes ... CM

Elliot,
what news? Everything OK?

Bayleaf, I admire your strength and attitude so much. I really hope you succeed soon.

Sorry to hear your news bayleaf. Hope your dd is proving a welcome distraction and blessing at this time.

I've ages to go yet - only about a week into down-reg. Keep forgetting to take it on time, but it seems to be working as I'm bleeding again, so I hope all will happen on schedule. My coping strategy is a bit different from yours though - I am busy convincing myself that it won't work and rationalising why that won't be such a bad thing (who wants siblings with birthdays within a week of each other anyway? )

Bayleaf - sorry to hear it hasn't worked, what a shame. I'm sure it's worse with IVF, after all you have to go through each time. Don't worry about the name mix-up, it's confusing trying to add a message without being able to see the one you're responding to. I hope things go well for you in March.

Hmm - that made me smile elliott - actually our strategies aren't so differnt - I never try and convince myself that it'll work when I'm doing it, far from it, that'd make me far too vulnerable - I just try and find a positive side to everything - exactly as you are doing- ie if it doesn't work this time it's not so bad because .... It was hard this time because I actually WOULD have liked a baby in early October - the next 3 months are 'easy' as who wants a Nov/Dec/Jan baby??? I'd certainly never choose it so I can put a positive spin on having to wait over the next few months - but the only thing I could think this time was ''oh well at least I'll be able to start my new job share on time in September instead of going on maternity leave exactly as it starts!''

I had a bit of a blip this afternoon I had the official phone call and apparently I did have a 'chemical pregnancy' ( ie it implanted and briefly started to produce hcg but never progressed) which made me all emotional as it somehow made it worse to have got so close but not made it - PLUS it means that I've got to be late for work yet again as I'll need another test even though she admitted there was no chance of it ever being a viable pregnancy. Then within 10 minutes of this - and still red eyed I had to pick up dd from the childminder where she goes for a few hours on a Tuesday - only for her to hold on to the childminder's legs saying her name and not want to come to me. She LOVES the childminder but has never ever done anything like this before and I'm sure you can imagine it was NOT what I needed. Heaven only knows what the childminder thought - I just had to grab her protesting and stuff her in the car before I burst into tears again myself....The logical part of me knows it's probably to do with her dropping her midday nap ( as of this weekend)and beign over-tired but the rational part of me isn't completely in control at the moment

Oh Bayleaf, I'm so sorry to hear your misgivings this time were confirmed and feel if anyone on the planet deserved that tart and that chocolate, then you did. I really hope that March brings success, and like the others here, I goggle at your good humour and resilience through all of this. Your family and pupils are jolly lucky to have you!

Bayleaf, that must have been a bit of a sting in the tail, having the news about the chemical pregnancy. Just when you want to move on and look forward.
But MArch is really no time at all - you might even complete your next cycle before I do!! Will it be a natural cycle FET? I don't know much about FET procedures as its never been relevant.

Oh, and I won't have a word said against November babies

But honestly I do feel very much in two minds about this cycle - I am genuinely quite freaked at the possibility of another one so soon (even more freaked by the idea of twins!!) although I imagine I will feel rather different if/when it doesn't work. The next time (which I'm planning for summer) will be a different matter, as it will be closer to what I would have chosen as an age gap, and also I'm not sure if we can afford or cope with a third attempt after that. But I'm getting ahead of myself here. At the moment I'm finding it quite stressful just thinking about fitting it all in with work and ds - lots of complicated childcare arrangements, slight panic about how to do stims when dh is away and I have ds to look after, etc etc.

I completely understand how you think elliott - at the begining I was TOTALLY terrified at the prospect of twins - and now I feel completely different. I expect if I talk to my consultant about it he'll tell me it's an acknowledged ivf syndrome - your feelings about twins are in direct proportion to how many failed attempts you've had!!!
It may sound daft but I think you're really lucky to be starting ivf soon enough to honestly WANT ( sort of) it to work second time not first - being a year further on from you makes it very different for me.
Yes it is a complete nightmare making provision for looking after ds/dd - especially if you haven't told many people as I hadn't.

I admit that I know very little about FET and whether they'll want me to take any drugs at all - hopefully all questions will be answered on Friday.

bayleaf,
so sorry to hear your ivf cycle failed, having gone through it a couple of times I know how stressful the whole thing is, particularly if not telling many people.

On my first attempt I got severe OHSS - nearly 50 eggs!! So no implant, all suitable embeyoes frozen.
My first attempt then with frozen did not work but the second did.
My recollections were that the FET were easier on the drug front - it was a matter of getting your body in a position to accept the embreyo as opposed to the whole egg production first as well. It was also much quicker.

After first failed attempt we told no-one we were trying again, on 2nd Ivf cycle for second child I told 2 close friends - dp and I found it easier that way.

Good luck to you and elliot,
mindy x

Have been offline for a few days, and was wondering how you were getting on, bayleaf. Very sorry to hear it didn't work--I hope it goes better next time. So frustrating to have to wait, though.

bayleaf, me too. We're all rooting for you.

Hi Bayleaf - I've been away for a week but just wanted to say hello and sorry it didn't work this time - me and dp were thinking about you - lots of luck for March.

just wondering how those of you trying the old-fashioned way(!) are doing? WWW? who else?

I think I last posted on the previous thread, but I'm still ttc... "with conventional methods" (and a bit of help from Persona/ovulation sticks). Eleven cycles and still counting. At least we already have dd, and I had a mc before that, so know it's physically possible.
But that doesn't stop me feeling pretty fed up from time to time - especially this weekend when not only did my period arrive just as I'd convinced myself we'd cracked it this month, and then had the worst period pains I've had for ages. I realise it's nothing at all in comparison with the agonies some of you are going through with IVF, but I did feel a mite sorry for myself.

sprout
I do know exactly where you're coming from - most of my time spent ttc ds was like that, as I had no reason to think it wouldn't just happen normally. So don't talk your feelings down - they're real enough!

Thanks for asking elliott. We've had lots of sex this month (because we wanted to, not just because of trying) but I'm sure I'm not pregnant although my period is a week away. I'm premenstrual for one thing and still haven't got around to working out when I ovulate for another. So although there weren't that many days when we didn't have sex we could still have just about missed ovulation (if I am ovulating, don't even know that for sure!) I feel Ok about it in a kind of 'if it happens it happens if it doesn't, never mind' kind of way. I think I was expecting it to happen straight away and was disappointed at first but I've decided really that what will be will be...

I posted on the original thread - have been using persona - and am almost 5 weeks pregnant. Haven't told anyone in real life yet.

Good luck to everyone!!

congratulations bluebear!! Hope the first trimester passes quickly and uneventfully. Will this be number two for you?
www, I'd say with 'not many days' when you didn't dtd who knows what might happen...

Sprout - you have EVERY right to feel down - in some ways it's worse when there's ''nothing wrong'' and you are condemmed to having to bd at certain times of the month, every month, whether you want to or not, seemingly for all perpetuity!

I know, I've tried both and I can't really say this is that much worse - just more expensive!
The thing that gets me down is time passing - me being 39 in March and dd already being 2...

WWW - I'd say that sound v positive as 'natural, ''wanted'' sex is supposed to work far better than procreational bd....

I've booked a frozen embryo transfer in March - and I'm risking going for a 'natural' cycle ( ie no drugs) but this is a risk as if I don't ovulate it'll be cancelled and I'm not sure I will ovulate as when I was charting before there were odd months when I didn't.
I know I shall be soooooooooo frustrated and pi**ed off if that happens - but the alternative is the whole down reg and stimulate thing as tho you were having ivf - AND a likely EC/ET date just when we've booked a nice weekend away at one of those hotels in the Mumsnet 'hotels with childcare'review!!
I've also elected to have 3 put back next time which he says is fine.

One thing that has made me feel a bit 'down' tho - (not terribly logically but still, since when did emotions need logic...)
My consultant is a nice bloke and very open and friendly - I knew that he had a ds 6-7ish and twins 2.5 - all icsi - I didn't realise till last night tho that altho the first ds was a easy first time success, they had about 13 or so embryos put back ( ie at least 5 failures) before the twins came along - and at the time his wife was only mid 30s - and there's nothing ''wrong'' with her - just his sperm. He was just emphasising to me that so much of it seems to be ''chance'' and I really do appreciate his honesty and openess about it all, it does help - but having to imagine another 3 or 4 failures before success is pretty depressing!!!!

Ok the logical part of my brain knows that's stupid and does not actually affect my chances in any way - but I've had some sort of virus since Friday - and still have raging sore throat and feel cr*p so is kind of hard to put self in positive frame of mind at the moment.
Also have a smear test in an hour's time - oh my cup runneth over!