TTC after loss part 5

[Ella31]

Just continuing our old thread. I've added anyone who has asked to stay on here. As always, anyone who is trying after a loss is welcome to join and those who have been lucky since are welcome to encourage those who are still waiting for their rainbow (if you want to stay of course )

Also for the next thread, I'm going to let someone else take over creating the new one if people don't mind. I've a lot on at the moment with tests and I'm back to work in the next few weeks after my bereavement leave with my boys. So if anyone would like to take the mantle, feel free.

Im 2dpo today and have another ultrasound on Wednesday to see if follicle has burst followed by pdg blood test.

@Onthedouble123
@DonnaWhat
@moosey89
@Bellebg
@Lovedatforme
@Ncl31
@PearlCat
@LucyCL
@CadoAvo
@ThelastRolo20
@Figtree11

@Ella31 you have got this. Take a deep breath, hold onto your partner and just put one foot in front of the other.

Baby had a good heartbeat. Thought I was 7 weeks, 2 days. Measuring 6 weeks 2. But they said its based on 28 day cycle, day 14 ovulation. I'm 32 day cycle and day 18 ovulation. So they didn't seem concerned. Hard not to worry though.

Ah that's wonderful news! I understand the worry but with your ovulation those dates make complete sense. So common to be out up to a week and you're less than that!! Lots of people have similar and go on to have successful pregnancies.

A strong heartbeat is a wonderful sign ❤️

Brilliant!

@Ella31 i’m so pleased it went well. And that makes a lot of sense about the dates. Women ovulate on so many different dates they need to try standardise it somehow. When will your next scan be?

@ThelastRolo20 ive not yet, as I thought the doctor might just say I need to wait & say it takes time for it to start again. But I am worrying. I go on holiday in a couple of weeks so thought if it’s not appeared by then I will ring up

@Ella31 also forgot to add, when I had a scan earlier this year, I was told I measured 7+1. Then a few minutes later she changed it to 7+5. So even the angle they are looking at it can make a difference as they are so tiny

@MrsS11 yeah it was hard. It took quite a while to feel comfortable talking about it too. It was much easier to talk about the pnd. There's more prejudice about psychosis compared to depression. I have had it previously with mania and other severe depressions but usually focus on the main episode.

The way in manifested meant it was hard to reach out to people as they were all entangled in it. The initial psychosis was that my daughter wasn't real which meant the midwives, HV, perinatal team, NCT weren't real either as they only existed in the world where the baby was. It evolved to her not being mine or being swapped and as my partner wasn't commenting on the facts she wasn't ours or hadn't been swapped must have been complicit in the deceit so wasn't a safe person to confided in. It was very isolating.

Hopefully it doesn't happen again but I think having come out the other side once I will be in a better position to say something isn't right earlier and before it gets consuming and it's harder to reach out because of the them Vs me that it brings

Thanks ladies. I've another scan Tuesday actually as it's my actual booking scan with the obestrician who took care of me during my pregnancy with my boys and who delivered them. So I'm seeing him Tuesday to go under his care again

You've gone through so much and are so brave to share this. Xxxx

Finally had my peak yay 🙌

@Ella31 So nice to hear you’re pregnant with healthy baby.

I’ve been off of these forums for quite a while now taking a break.
On cycle 8 now currently ovulating I think. I just had some brown spotting. I’ve never had ovulation spotting before so this is very odd and I don’t know if I should be concerned.

I am happy for you and I find it easier to take it day by day.

Yay @Ella31 that's great!! I've had 3 'overdue' babies so done a lot of reading on due dates, they have a 2-5 day margin of error (until you're overdue, when the docs want them out asap!) @Superscientist that sounds absolutely terrifying. Hopefully you and your family are all much better equipped to deal with any of this stuff coming up again though.
I'm at the hairdresser's, I thought I was near the end of 'last time I was doing this I was pregnant' things but they keep cropping up. Deep breath...

@Ella31 great news!🥰
@emmatcc1 I had brown spotting during ovulation when I fell pregnant. I'd never had it before so I'm not sure what caused it. Hopefully it's a good sign!

@Ella31 whooop. One step down and one hurdle down. The next one will be just as easy.

on a shit note…. I’m cycle day 1 😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩

@jellyfish2 Still spotting but I’m pretty sure I ovulated today. It would also be my due date today so I hope this is a sign.

@Ella31 that’s great you have another scan soon.

@Mummysparrow fingers crossed for a lucky cycle for you!

@emmatcc1 i hope you get some positive news this cycle

@Nic2908 i’m sorry that AF has arrived

As you all know I’m cycle day 53 now 😂 but I have some mild tummy ache & spotting today so think AF is on the way. Feel like I should be relieved that it’s starting to do something, but instead I just feel disheartened that I’m not pregnant as we put so much effort into dtd every 2 days for the past 6 weeks to try & catch when ovulation happened

@Figtree11 here I am feeling sorry for myself having to wait until cd 21 for a peak and you are on cycle day 53. I can only imagine how frustrated and tired you feel. Not knowing when you are going to ovulate and having sex often to catch the fertile days is tiring isn't it. Hopefully the next cycle is better for you and is the one to get a BFP.
@emmatcc1 fingers crossed for you

I hope so too 🩷

@Mummysparrow thank you, I am feeling emotional and you being so kind has made me tear up. The thought of another 7 week cycle after this one is just so overwhelming. Need to try & get into a more positive headspace after I have a day of feeling sorry for myself x

I had af symptoms every month including the one we conceived. I really hope this is it for you this month. Fingers crossed

@Ella31 thanks, in the back of my mind I was hoping it wasn’t AF. But the spotting has increased, and this usually happens before it starts

Hi everyone I hope everyone is on. I’m sorry for the frustrations we are all feeling.

I am 10 days post surgical management and sat on a beach in corfu. My BF booked it to get me away as I was beside myself with emotion. It has been a beautiful welcome distraction but the sadness is still so raw. Although having a lovely time I keep thinking we are only here because of our loss. I have stopped bleeding and am feeling physically back to myself as sad as it is the no extreme nausea and dizziness is such a welcome relief.

I have also found my sex drive again , sorry if tmi but I am so horny and just want it 247. Prob the sun and sea air. I am secretly hoping it’s my ovulation and body coming back to normal but it’s obviously too early. We haven’t had it yet and again feel guilty trying again so quickly.

not sure what this post is about just very mixed feelings xxxx

@Figtree11 its so difficult when you don't have a predictable cycle. I had irregular bleeding after stopping breastfeeding. My "cycles" were 14-45 days mostly around 14 but it was a nightmare not knowing when it was going to arrive and making sure I had supplies with me and I only had that aspect to worry about ovulation side as I was on contraception (i know not real cycles). I hope that you catch your ovulation soon. Much love

@Joleyjojo about 2 weeks after my miscarriage I had a few days of increased sex drive and a change in discharge. 2 weeks later I got my period so I think it was ovulation related. Hoping it's the same for you x

@Nic2908 I'm day 3 so you'll have company as you navigate this next cycle. Be kind to yourself x

@MrsS11 it's horrible when that happens. One less thing that can trigger that thought though. I had it at the toddler group I went to earlier this week. It hadn't been on during the summer and the last time I was there I was struggling with nausea and vomiting from pregnancy.

My daughter has started school this week and a few of her class mates have baby siblings which just makes my insides ache.

@Joleyjojo I hope you are enjoying your holiday as much as you can. After my d&c I went on a work trip to Asia 3 weeks after thinking it would be a welcome distraction. But even being far away doesn’t stop the mind overthinking. I’d be fine all day, then go to my hotel in the evening & have a bath & just feel so so sad. Hope you enjoy the rest of your trip

@Superscientist thank you, yeah it’s the thought of having to go through another long cycle again is getting me down. If it’s the same as this time, I’ll be at the end of October heading into November before the chance to conceive again arises.