TTC after ectopic/after loss/older age etc ALL WELCOME 🙂

[YellowZ]

Hello,

Would anyone like to join a thread for TTC after ectopic/miscarriage, or when facing other challenges eg age, PCOS etc? DP and I have just decided to try again for no2, and I'm going to come off the pill. It would be nice to have some buddies to share experiences and support each other 🙂

About me:

Pregnancy 1: conceived first cycle age 35, healthy pregnancy, DS born summer 2021 (now age 2)

Pregnancy 2: conceived first cycle age 37, ectopic, surgery November 2022

My plan is to eat well, exercise, cut out alcohol, and generally look after myself.

Because I got pregnant quickly both times, I'm hoping our chances are still good...no idea how only having the one fallopian tube is going to affect things 😬

I think I'll do OPKs but not sure about temping yet.

Would love to hear from others!

Hey @Stategigi welcome 🙂 sorry you're going through this. Sounds like a nightmare.

Do you have any risk factors that would make adverse outcomes from surgery more likely? I'm surprised that surgery has been presented as a last resort while your HCG is going up and you're bleeding. Having said that @lemonyfox had a similar experience I think (hope you don't mind the tag Lemony and that you're doing OK).

I've had the surgery, and while it does slightly reduce your chance of conceiving, I think if the tube remains and there is scarring etc there's a higher chance of a second ectopic in the same location? Worth asking the hospital about perhaps.

Hope it's resolved soon for you! It's horrible knowing something is wrong and having to wait.

Also just to add, I didn't mean to worry you more with the idea of a repeat ectopic - just thought it might be worth asking a Dr if TTC is less risky with only the 1 tube? x

@Stategigi so are they saying your only two options are expectant management or surgery? NICE guidelines are that methotrexate is routinely offered if HCG levels are below 5,000. The earlier you have it, the better the outcome.

I've had 3 ectopics and didn't have expectant management for either of mine, so I might not be the best person to ask, but based on your HCG and cell growth I'm not sure why they're advising a wait and see approach!

Hopefully you get this all resolved soon, we can all sympathise with how emotional and frustrating the experience is.

@Stategigi So sorry to hear what you’re going through, I’m really shocked that your hospital don’t offer methotrexate. Is there another fairly local hospital who you can transfer your care to?

@YellowZ How you getting on? I’m 6DPO today and the symptom spotting has started 🙈

@Bumblesbee84 hi, thanks for checking in. I have given up this month. I got to day 24 no ovulation and no positive test. So I’ve decided to just let it be this month and crack on with the next cycle.

Thank you @YellowZ and @lemonyfox Do you remember what your HCG levels and mass/cell/embryo size were for your 3 ectopic pregnancies?
UCLH don't offer the drug as they say they are an evidence based hospital and it hasn't been shown to work strongly in one way or the other. I think they feel the HCG can rise, then plateaus and the body can sort it out itself. My consultant said in 20 years she'd seen only 3 ruptures. She said often the bleed can come out the end of the fallopian tube so you can have a change of symptoms and go straight in for check up. (I've only heard of ruptures.)

@YellowZ It was news to me on Monday however that my tube will be damaged regardless and the mass could remain after 3 months. I did flag to her, what's the point if you end up having another ectopic or needing surgery. Again they say it's patient lead and I can have surgery but usually it's good to avoid if you can as surgery comes with it's own risks. They feel my EP is early...
It's making me think why go through all this and still end up needing a surgery or a guaranteed blocked / damaged tube with future issues? Or nip it in bud and get on with life.

I also don't understand why they won't scan me every time I go in for bloods (I invited on it Monday and that's when we learnt it grew 4mm) - surely you'd want to track the growth and that feels a fair additional monitoring for what is quite a psychologically traumatic treatment option to try to stick with.

I'm so sorry for my long messages, I don't know how to get it out succinctly atm. I really hope everyone on this chat is keeping positive on their fertility journeys. My colleagues sister had an EP and IVF and ended up have a baby naturally, so another positive story x

@Stategigi I think your Consultant sounds insane, I'm sorry. 3 ruptured in 20 years doesn't sound right at all, in fact I was sitting in my local EPU last week and I think 3 ladies in that room were in there with suspected ruptured ectopics.

My HCG levels:
1st ectopic: around 3400 and treated with methotrexate at 9 weeks
2nd ectopic: only 1200 and still ruptured at 7 weeks
3rd ectopic: over 10,000 and surgically removed before rupture (based on my request) around 7 weeks

@Stategigi hope you have an OK day today. Are you getting well looked after by DP? 🙂 Hope so.

My HCG was about 550 when I had the scan, and the consultant told me I needed surgery immediately (I also had about a pint of blood sloshing about my abdomen - which was strangely painless) so in my experience HCG levels don't mean that much, although my experience could be unusual.

It's really tricky isn't it, because ultimately the medical staff are supposed to be the experts in this - but I'd say if you've done research, weighed up the risks, you want the surgery, and they're saying treatment is patient led, then keep asking for it. Obviously there could be complications with the surgery, but the pain afterwards was fine for me (only took paracetamol for a couple of days). Felt a bit bruised. The scars are tiny as well.

I wonder if there are any charities out there that might be able to help with advice? https://ectopic.org.uk/how-we-can-help. Looks like they have a phone/email advice line if you click "get help"

Xx

@MrsB2019x 6dpo here so a day behind you. I'm ok, my progesterone test this morning was positive 🙂 (think I'll stop bothering with them next cycle)

Think I'll order some tests on Friday to arrive Saturday (9dpo) because of Christmas, but try to hold out on taking one... I have 1 sore boob and had some weird twinges yesterday. And my cervix has moved up a bit. All stuff that means absolutely nothing ha ha

Hi ladies, hope you're all doing ok today.

I did my pregnancy test this morning (with 2nd morning wee) 3 weeks post medical management and it looks very positive still. It's faint, but if that was a bfp from a normal cycle, I'd think yep I'm definitely pregnant. Blurgh. I called epu and they said as it's Christmas there's no scanning space and to test again next week and if still positive they'll book me in for scan. It feels so bloody frustrating, I just want to be able to move on. Need to regroup a bit before trying to get on with work. My previous MMC I had a negative test after 2 weeks, so think I was expecting the same kind of thing.

Hello @Bumblesbee84 how frustrating. Sorry you're having this awful wait. Definitely keep going with the fizz and mince pies over Christmas 🙂 did the epu give any indication of when they'd expect you to be testing negative?

@YellowZ thanks, that's the plan lots of fizz and festive treats! They said to test again next weds and if still positive they'll scan me. I'm so keen to get back to ttc, just frustrating it's something else I have no control over. I've done some mumsnet searching and doesn't seem that uncommon to still have a positive test at this stage...so hoping it's just hormones being slow to leave my system.

What day are you planning to test? Really hoping we're not waiting long for our new bfps! X

Well. Originally I said 12DPO AND NO EXCUSES!! But I'm thinking I might cave before then haha. Hoping I'll make it to the weekend at least. If it's a BFN on Christmas Day I'll risk a glass of wine.

I believe in you @YellowZ 🙌
I’m an idiot and tested this morning at 8dpo, obviously a BFN because why would it be positive at 8dpo 🤦🏻‍♀️ I just can’t help myself!

@MrsB2019x I think 8dpo is just about in the legitimate testing window. Thanks for believing in me! I have such an urge to poas now. God it really is a long wait isn't it? 😭

Hope you're ok @Stategigi

I dunno I’d probably class 10DPO as just about legit. I’ve just about lost the plot 😂

@Stategigi I had expectant management with my ectopic pregnancy- I don't recommend but also i shouldn't have been allowed it according to NICE guidelines.

My hcg was 2000 when I first went in at around 5.5/6 weeks. 48 hours later went down to 1500 I was told either my body was sorting itself out or it wasn't ectopic and I was miscarrying. Over the next 2 weeks it slowly went down, and I even went on to weekly blood tests rather than 24 hours. Then it ruptured when hcg was down to 400. So hcg doesn't really mean much. At first scan they thought they could see a 4cm mass (I also had massive cysts - which made it hard to see), when it ruptured they saw a 6cm mass. They couldn't see any free fluid on scans but when they operated there was 1.5ltrs of blood in my abdomen.

Also I've been a bit absent lately, but needed a break from mumsnet after yet another BFN.

In other news I went for a scan to check on the my ovary after I had a 10cm cyst removed in July. It's grown back - only 3cm, but I'm now worried about what that means. I doubt I'll hear anything from my consultant until the new year which is annoying.
There's also some fluid, possibly to do with scarring near where my tube was removed - so another thing that is stressing me. My consultant wanted me to wait until July for a Hycosy, but now I'm thinking when I do get to speak to her I might ask for a sooner referral, or go private. This cycle is our 6th cycle, it took 6 cycles with DD but we were told my massive cysts (largest 10cm) would have made it harder then. I just keep thinking we're going to need ivf, but we're delaying tests unnecessarily.

Hey @Confusedddddddd nice to hear from you. Did they give you any indication of what it might mean? Sorry it's a worrying time.

Any further testing @MrsB2019x ?

@YellowZ nope sonographers said it really looks like endometriosis. Like my other cyst did before. It was only once biopsies they said it was blood filled, no endometriosis. They have no clue why it was there.

I'm also very confused today as sonographers said during the scan (cd 10) that I had an 18mm dominant follicle on my right side (my good ovary but without a tube), cd15 today, peak opks, but I have ovulation pain on my left side (where the cyst is).

@Confusedddddddd Nice to see you back, sorry you’re finding it tough at the moment. Sounds like you have a lot going on. July surely isn’t feasible for a hycosy when you’ve gone through so much already?

@YellowZ Of course 😂 once I’ve started there’s no point in stopping lol. My test majorly flooded for some reason this morning (didn’t do anything different than usual 🤷🏻‍♀️) so it’s invalid but once dry it had 2 lines which is super annoying, have attached a pic. There was nothing in the first 5 mins though. Have you managed to hold out?

Errrrrm no @MrsB2019x I did not hold out. I am so sorry to betray your trust in me. Clear blue early are notorious for evaps, aren't they? It was the only early test I could get hold of. There was a super faint line to torture myself over. Your test looks interesting though. Have you done another since that one?

Actually the line was there in the timeframe and doesn't have that tell-tale darker edge, but it's like a ghost of a line.

@YellowZ Did you take a picture of it? Would be interested to see it!
I didn’t take another test after that cos I didn’t see the point as it wouldn’t be FMU, I’ll try again tomorrow but pretty certain it will be blank