POAS: With only the IC in stock...someone help us 🤣

[FfayeN]

You asked for it......😘

Ah @bunnykins123 it's so tough as we all want answers but then when we get them it's a new stressful thing to deal with. We're all here for you and rooting for you. Hopefully your doctor is proactive and will put a plan in place so you're at least armed with clarity on next steps asap

I've had what feels exactly like my period cramps today, at 15/16DPO, AF due tomorrow so think I'm officially out this month. Blood tests next week for me and appointment for sperm analysis later this month for him.

We get one to two rounds of IVF (if our tests mean we are candidates) on the NHS and both parents have said they could help us fund a further two. I need to remember this when I panic and think how fucking lucky that is as we couldn't self fund that realistically.

Trying so hard to be positive but I must admit this is really increasing my anxiety. As I'm bipolar but usually extremely stable thanks to my meds (which luckily are fine to take throughout pregnancy) this is a concern in case it triggers an episode but again, that's my anxiety talking and not reality.

This thread is such a lifeline and I appreciate you all so much

both parents have said they could help us fund a further two

To be clear, one each not two. They aren't that flush! So is ever so kind of them as none of us have enough that it isn't a huge amount to give up and I appreciate it so much and must remember how lucky that is that they are willing to do that for us. I wish we could all have that

Thanks gals! After the initial shock, I think I'm okay now. Obviously spent the entire evening googling. He is only 1% above normal so hoping that's not so extreme that it'll prevent us moving forward with ivf.

@TheBirdintheCave well we got this test done to determine next steps for ivf so I'm going to be getting DH on some potent supplements and make some changes to helpfully help lower the numbers. In all honestly, I'm not surprised (after the initial shock!). I always knew he could be part of the problem.

@mummatara thanks lovely! Yeh I'll schedule some time with the consultant next week to discuss to see exactly how bad they are and next steps. Googling tells me that it's bad but not awful so let's see. Problem is, lifestyle changes = no alcohol, cleanup diet - how the heck can we do that going into Xmas!!!

@calimc83 thanks lovely! I think I predicted this months ago, didn't I 🤦‍♀️😂 yeh just follow up discussion now to determine next steps. It actually feels good to know a bit more and have something else to blame. Maybe my eggs aren't so dodgy after all 🙋‍♀️ wishful thinking... how are you doing? Xx

@MrsCristianoX thanks lovely, just trying to get my head around the results too! It's actually really confusing how the analyse the data! Why can they not just make it really simple?!

@monsteramunch thanks lovely. I guess it's just understanding how bad it is. Whhhy do they just send results across with no call to discuss?! That's great you can get 2 cycles funded by your parents. Oh heck - I get that panic. I feel it all the time. I think it's the realisation that you actually have to venture into the ivf world of check ups, needles, tests, scans etc which is scary. It's also accepting that maybe it just won't happen naturally. I have panic attacks at the same points in my cycle too, mainly the disappointment but often the realisation that another month has failed and brings us closer to having to push the button on ivf.

@mummatara oh hun I really hope Monday gives you a clue about what on Earth is going on!!! I can only imagine how frustrating the wait is for you 😔.

@bunnykins123 it is good that you may have an answer for the issues, I think once you've had some clarity you'll feel a lot better going forward. Slowly but surely getting answers and a plan. I know what you mean about trying to implement the good things over Christmas 🫣.

@MrsCristianoX did you keep temping? Any sign of an ovulation dip?

Mine was sky high this morning...but that's definitely the work Christmas parties fault 🫠.

@monsteramunch im glad the thread is giving you some of the support you need and it sounds like you have a good plan moving forward too 🥰

@TheBirdintheCave it does sound like irritation. Also if you take progesterone vaginally it can irritate causing spotting. I don't know if you recall my embarrassing stories about that 😬. xx

@bunnykins123 sorry to hear about the sperm frag results. But if they seem borderline possibly something to be done a not worst of the worst.
A like you said you half expected after so many losses perhaps he was but of the issue.
but more answers closer you perhaps are. Hoping this makes next steps clearer for you 🤞🏼

keep plodding on ladies. It is freezing as F here lol 🥶

Its all worse this morning. Brown with streaks of red. This must be the end. My poor baby 😭

@TheBirdintheCave oh hun 😔. I hope it's not the end for you, sending massive hugs xxx

@FfayeN Me too :( Sorry for my panic. I'm autistic and struggle to deal with sudden changes. I always go straight to the worst outcome 🤦🏻‍♀️ Always much worse when it happens on the weekend too as I can't contact the EPU. I emailed them asking for a scan to double check things so will see what they say on Monday.

@TheBirdintheCave ❤️

@TheBirdintheCave oh hun. I know it's scary, but try not to assume the worst. When you say it's brown with red streaks, is it like in discharge? None of my miscarriages have started this way, just red blood. It could still just be something as simple as irritation. Are you using cyclogest?

@Indianna2006 thanks lovely. It really was expected but now the reality is we know he has duff sperm 🤦‍♀️ weirdly, I feel ok but deep down know I'm so disappointed it's confirmed. Hopefully we get more answers next week!

@FfayeN thanks lovely! I'm having a take away and wine tonight, because sod it - my body might not actually be what's causing this infertility 😂 and then I'll address it tomorrow. God knows what the clinic will say but I'll update you once I've spoken with them!

@bunnykins123 Yeah just brown cm with red streaks. It's all gone now 🤷🏻‍♀️ And yes I'm still taking the Cyclogest via the other entrance 😂

EPU replied to my email and asked me to go for a scan on Monday so I guess I'll see then :/

It's largely cos this spotting is just like how my MMC started though perhaps a little less frequent. At least I know there is a baby in there this time I guess 🤷🏻‍♀️

Anyway sorry to keep derailing, I'll let you all know what the outcome is on Monday. Xx

@bunnykins123 ahhhh why is a lifestyle change always the answer 😭 god that's rubbish! Enjoy your takeaway one more day won't make a difference. How is DH feeling?

@FfayeN it's frustrating when I think about when the MC was confirmed and it feels like such a long time ago but only when I think about it. at this point I'm so busy one week bleeds into the next and it only feels like it happened the other week not 3 months ago 🤦🏼‍♀️ when you off to NY?

So I did another frer this morning just because I love wasting a bit of money 😂 I would say it looks the same as 2 days ago. Though I did have a random thought about if you had hcg already there and you ovulated would the new baby double on what you've got or only add to it a small amount 😂 I love thinking all these random possibilities. only a couple more days to wait for some kind of answer. Still no AF and I'm 12dpo usually she would have arrived yesterday or today 🤷🏼‍♀️

@mummatara that's a great line though. Keep us updated on Monday. It feels like you've been in limbo for AGES

Money means nothing when it could give you an answer. I'm absolutely not testing early. Half way through a Chinese, wine and patiently waiting for Grealish to come on😅

@bunnykins123 you have a DD? Can high fragmentation just happen for no reason?

@mummatara I so hope its a new one :D

@mummatara oh I really feel for you. It's so strange, partly this year has flown by, and partly it seems to crawl. Always the opposite to what you want it to! 3 months though 😔.
I really hope it's a new one for you, Monday is not too far away to find out ☺️.
I actually go first thing in the morning! Really looking forward to it and escaping a bit.
I am temping, expecting ovulation within a few days if it's the same as last time but my OPKs are still super high so I think temping is going to be the only way to know!

I will definitely keep track the next few days on your posts, just might not have time to reply 😘 xx

@MrsCristianoX it really does feel like it doesn't it I feel like every week I'm saying still here in the same old place or what could this be 😂 ooooh I'd love a Chinese we had one hello fresh left to make so we were good and had that 🙄

@TheBirdintheCave gosh I hope so too but the way my luck has run this year it's prob unlikely 🙈

@FfayeN yes 3 months is such an age ago I can almost just not believe it 🙄 I know it's partly because I tried to let nature do what it was supposed to but it's also a lot of nhs waiting for bloods or scans which is the worst 🙈 eeek I'm so jealous I've never been to NY I keep telling DH I want to go but he's been a few times so doesn't seem all that keen 😂 be good for you to go away give you something else to focus on for a little bit 🤞🏼 scan is at 10.10 too so it really just feels like one more day 🙊 yes I'm glad I temped after as those opks were no use at all 🙄

@mummatara I have been four times and I hate it 😂

@TheBirdintheCave oh no really 😂 I feel like it's one of those places you should at least visit once 🙊

@mummatara @FfayeN I haven't tempted but will get an ovusense when AF arrives. I'd love a NY trip too. DH not keen though 🙄

We were meant to be away tonight but DS2 has strep A so couldn't leave him. Got a full refund though x

@MrsCristianoX oooh you've gone for it. I'm still hoping a Apple Watch might be under the tree 🤞🏼😂 oh no does is he ok? I'm glad you got a refund

@mummatara Yeah I find it crowded, smelly and it feels dangerous at night. Also, the subway is loud and intensely hot in the summer 😂

Plus points: Ellis Island with the immigration museum is fascinating, broadway is fun and New Yorkers know how to do a good breakfast.

@mummatara god he was in a terrible state on Thursday. Got him antibiotics Friday and he's watching football with me now. Very tired and achy but his tonsils have thankfully shrunk.

Yep I'm 1000% sure this is not my month so I'm getting it

@TheBirdintheCave you sold me at breakfast 😂 I'll try and ignore all the bad stuff when I'm there. one day I'll get to go if DH won't take me I'll get the girls together we love a trip 🙊

@MrsCristianoX oh bless him I'm glad he's feeling better. I was a bit worried about DS catching it he seems to have had all sorts recently and it makes me nervous he can't tell me what's wrong yet but can't lock him up so just have to have my super mum head on. When is AF due?