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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

41 and still trying! Any joiners

180 replies

ladybuggoldfinch · 19/09/2022 09:08

Good morning! I've not posted on MN for a while as trying to take a more laid back approach but let's face it that doesn't work anymore than anxiously rabbit holeing your way through a cycle either.

I am coming to the end of cycle 2083626480 and I have had all the usual period symptoms! Everything seemed to come together nicely this time so it's another disappointing month. Not tested but know the inevitable. My partner and I have some fertility tests coming up so hopefully some light will be shed on our situation.

I have a 3 year old and have had 3 miscarriages last year.

Anybody in the same boat and would like a friendly thread to share their journey it would be great to hear from you!

OP posts:
WonderWoop · 26/09/2022 22:55

Wishing you all best of luck with your journey. I am 39, will be 40 when DS is born. Have DD aged almost 3. Took 2 years to conceive DD and 1.5 to conceive DS. 2 MC along the journey.

Things that helped us... aside from the obvious continual poas... pre-seed lubricant and inositol powder (bought this through bulk powders). Plus baby aspirin as soon as pregnant.

thejadefish · 27/09/2022 16:10

Wish I'd known about these groups when I was ttc, it was such an emotional rollercoaster. DC1 took 20 cycles to conceive (finally successful at age 39, although I didn't realise at the time that you could increase your odds/fertile window etc might have been different had I known) and DC2 took almost 3 years. I am 45 now and he is currently 11 weeks old (whilst I wanted to try again when DC1 turned 1, DH wasn't ready until she was 2 although he would have preferred to wait until she was 3 or 4 - he never believed the stats about it getting harder to conceive as you get older). I would have liked another but given my age think I need to be realistic and grateful for what I've got. Wishing everyone the best of luck xx

Chasingclouds100 · 27/09/2022 19:58

Hi Honeyfox - would you mind me asking how you go about getting the egg reserve test? Can you get it done through gp or is it private?

pheonixyiz · 27/09/2022 20:13

This reply has been deleted

We've removed this post as we think it's a bit insensitive given the topic.

gretr · 27/09/2022 20:25

This reply has been deleted

We've removed this post as we think it's a bit insensitive given the topic.

Maybe save your sorrow for the babies that have parents who abuse them, not those who desperately want them.

Chasingclouds100 · 27/09/2022 21:31

I could give you a thousand reasons why. And why do you feel sorry for them???

Chasingclouds100 · 27/09/2022 21:32

Exactly!

Ninjajay · 27/09/2022 21:37

@pheonixyiz whilst you entitled to your opinion it's not the right place to express it. Unless you are in your 40s trying for a baby this is not the thread for you.

pheonixyiz · 27/09/2022 22:59

This reply has been deleted

This post has been removed as it's mean-spirited and not in the spirit.

gretr · 27/09/2022 23:16

This reply has been deleted

This post has been removed as it's mean-spirited and not in the spirit.

They are absolutely not facts. Methinks you skipped the statistics module at gcse.

Readaboutyourself · 27/09/2022 23:17

This reply has been deleted

This post has been removed as it's mean-spirited and not in the spirit.

Bore off

MK85 · 28/09/2022 00:25

@pheonixyiz that is not statistically correct

pheonixyiz · 28/09/2022 00:51

These statistics are from bmj, a reputable and credible peer reviewed journal.

pheonixyiz · 28/09/2022 00:53

www.bmj.com/content/364/bmj.l869

There's the link for those saying statistics are incorrect. Large test group too. Are you saying the scientists and doctors are wrong?

Ninjajay · 28/09/2022 03:27

@pheonixyiz why are you on this thread? Are you a parent?

lizziecat1 · 28/09/2022 07:12

This reply has been deleted

This post has been removed as it's mean-spirited and not in the spirit.

Even if those figures are correct, that's 29 in 30 babies without Downs, plus there are very accurate tests available in early pregnancy, allowing mums to make the appropriate choice regarding their pregnancy if their baby does have a chromosome defect. As a woman of 45 trying for a baby, I am well aware that this may not be an easy journey. I come here for the support of people in a similar position to me, and to share experiences with the lovely women in this group. This is really not the thread for you!

Chasingclouds100 · 28/09/2022 11:05

lizziecat1 · 28/09/2022 07:12

Even if those figures are correct, that's 29 in 30 babies without Downs, plus there are very accurate tests available in early pregnancy, allowing mums to make the appropriate choice regarding their pregnancy if their baby does have a chromosome defect. As a woman of 45 trying for a baby, I am well aware that this may not be an easy journey. I come here for the support of people in a similar position to me, and to share experiences with the lovely women in this group. This is really not the thread for you!

Show quote history

Exactly what I wanted to write but didn’t know how to write it!! Good luck with your journey, I am also 45 and ttc

lizziecat1 · 28/09/2022 11:27

@Chasingclouds100 Sending baby dust your way. This may not be an easy journey, but the reward will be SO worth it!

Chasingclouds100 · 28/09/2022 13:06

Thank you - you too! I totally agree xx

ohfook · 29/09/2022 14:45

pheonixyiz · 28/09/2022 00:51

These statistics are from bmj, a reputable and credible peer reviewed journal.

A) your statistics are disputed by reputable people in the field.

B) what do you hope to achieve? Presumably the women on this thread are adults with brains. They'll have done their own research and came to their own conclusion based on that.

zoomies1 · 07/10/2022 15:37

Looks like this thread took a dark turn! I can’t see all of the messages but I think it’s safe to say that people of our age are aware that it might not be straightforward and are making their decisions based on that. That’s why we came here, to look for support and a bit of humour. What a shame someone someone is trying to take away from that.

zoomies1 · 07/10/2022 15:38

On another note, I hope you are all keeping well. Looking forward to hearing some good news from some of you soon 😀

Ninjajay · 07/10/2022 19:50

Haha yeah it did take a bit of a unnecessary turn. I had my fertility results today and they were pretty shit. Low AFC and low AMH. Was expecting it to be honest. Basically not impossible to get pregnant but will be pretty hard. To be honest it's really helped me to know where things stand with my fertility and I feel like a bit of a weight has lifted. We will keep
Trying until I'm 42 but I am not going to let it take over every minute of my head space anymore.

Hope everyone is good 😊

Chasingclouds100 · 07/10/2022 21:40

Ninjajay - sorry your results were not as good as you had hoped them to be xx

Ninjajay · 08/10/2022 08:26

Thanks @Chasingclouds100 . One good thing is they had to do another ultrasound and could see I had just ovulated. Told me to have sex yesterday so that's what we went home and did LOL. So 1dpo for me. But I won't be holding my breath!