TTC after miscarriage thread 10

[mummatara]

@AwayWeGo22 @bunnykins123 @calimc83 @FfayeN @Chellooo @Indianna2006 @LuckyMoonstone @Luna57 @Margo34 @MIW01 @MrsCristiano @Pancake92 @pangolin84 @TheBirdintheCave @theblueflowers

Sorry if I forgot anyone ❤️ also hope I've done this right 😂

@Mariabombia so sorry you’re feeling this way! Grief has no severity scale or time scale neither. For a therapist to say you’re ‘coping well’ and not scheduling more appointments isn’t fair on you and your mental health. With the NHS being stretched would you consider private? It’s a real toss up when TTC as you always want to save as much as possible for the possible new arrival but if you think it will help with everything it might be worth it?

@MrsCristiano yay for peak, boo for DH choosing sleep over sexy time 😂

@Chellooo I had caved and tested 7dpo and 10dpo sometimes you just need to get it out of your system. Did you end up testing?

im 13dpo today and I might of ordered IC from Amazon they’re due to arrive between 1 and 3 today but from yesterday I started getting cramps and pains. I don’t normally get cramps before AF until she’s in full swing but even sitting down my womb just aches so I think this is gonna be one b!tch of an AF. This will be my first AF from MC so I’m not sure what to expect 🤷🏼‍♀️

@Luna57 bigger peak this morning. I got him then 🤣🤣

My mother was really offended when I didn't tell her immediately about my first MC in 2019 but when I did tell her, her attitude was 'oh well at least we've got other grandkids' - like that is what I wanted to hear! No "oh I'm sorry" no "would you like a hug?" No "would you like to talk about it?" Exactly the reason I didn't tell her straight away. My mother alienates herself but I think it is because she hasn't experienced it and so doesn't recognise the grief or loss so I do rather wonder if, when we say we alienate others, actually it could be the other way around.

Whereas my MIL is the total opposite and so understanding. She knows about my 2 MC this year whereas my own mother doesn't.

I don't know how anyone can pull themselves out of a MC without a supportive partner, those that do are some strong women!

@Mariabombia you’re so right! My boss (who is a bloke) just read a book on inequalities in healthcare for women and literally came in and apologised to us all for how women and “women’s problems” are underfunded, under-researched and dealt with by the health service so poorly!

@MrsCristiano oooh look at that opk!!! 😍

@Luna57 try not to worry too much about your af (if it even is her coming!). My first one after mc I had really bad cramps leading up to it for like a week but then no cramps during! So weird! And it was a tiny bit heavier than normal and a bit more clotty (sorry, tmi) but nothing bad. I would say maybe carry a change of pants with you in your handbag as I had a couple of small “gushes”. Not enough to overflow a pad but good to be prepared just in case! Xxx

@Mariabombia it's so hard. I told my mum about my miscarriage in May about a month ago but she immediately turned it round saying 'oh your granny had a miscarriage at 5 months' look at her picture pregnant with the lost baby that would have been my brother or sister 🤷‍♀️ that must have been hurtful to hear about the other grandchildren. It's just shit sometimes when you are trying to cope so you are obviously 'over it' but sometimes it gets you down so much. I think 3 Fridays ago I got in from work went to bed and just cried til I had to get up again for work the next day. And the fake face comes back on. God I'm on a rant now sorry ladies

Not yet! Holding out to Sat 🤞

Hi all, haven’t been on here much recently. Loads going on at work and was trying to forget about TTC for a while. CD13 today. After the CP last cycle I’m only half-heartedly testing with CB OPKs but got a high reading this morning plus have CM so going to attempt DTD tonight (if DH isn’t asleep 😂). Last cycle had high readings for 8 days before the peak showed up so may be in for a long wait and a lot of 🍆.

@pangolin84 good luck 🤞 my advice pounce on him b4 he sits down😂 and you've made me feel better with the 3 days of highs I'm having 🙄

@MrsCristiano yay for peak. And yay for 🍆

@pangolin84 hey lovely. Hope little break away did you good. An hopefully this cycle is the one.

@mummatara @calimc83 I’m same. We’re gonna have an early scan 8 weeks I think. But also contemplating so I go again. To calm my nerves. I only had one with my DD at 9 weeks and waited until 13 weeks for dating scan.
nothing is guranteed ever. Which is the worry. Even past 13 it isn’t guranteed is it. But I did read statically once you see a heartbeat at 8-9 weeks you chance lowers to like 3%. So you have pretty good odds. But of course. There will always be ppl in that 3% where by 12 weeks it’s gone wrong 😫 it’s so hard isnt it.
just endless endless worry.

@Chellooo I would try hold off as long as you can! 12dpo best day to see a semi decent line and no faint line guessing which is bollocks and very annoying thinking am I aren’t i 😂🤞🏼🤞🏼

@Luna57 my periods had deff been heavier since my mc.

@Mariabombia @LuckyMoonstone big hugs for anyone feeling crap. 100% it changes you. And it changes every subsequent pregnancy as well. Like it’s just not the same. It can’t be.

sorry for all the messages. Trying to reply to all the chat. Don’t look for a day when I’m at work and you guys move fast 😂

@Indianna2006 a peak! Finally! Better not be higher tomorrow 🙄

@Indianna2006 so true x

So sad hearing about all your mothers not being as supportive as you needed them to be. My mum was so upset for us she breaks my heart, my DS is her only grandchild and her whole life revolves around him. My MIL on the other hand… well that’s a story for a completely different thread 😂

I got a BPN earlier so definitely gearing up to use left over maternity pads for the gushes 😂 thought I’d be more annoyed about testing negative but I feel surprisingly calm.

@Luna57 how many dpo are you?

@FfayeN I've been watching that virgin river. They are all so nice to each other..I wanna move there

Any of you ladies who’ve been pregnant before or are pregnant again, do you always get the same symptoms of early pregnancy?
Before testing positive for the baby I lost I had implantation bleeding and then really sore boobs a couple of days before my period was due! Just wondering how common it is to get the same or different symptoms with each pregnancy xx

@ChloeN My symptoms with the baby I lost were different than when I was pregnant with my son so I think it really does just vary with every pregnancy.

@ChloeN I’ve been pregnant 3 times and felt different every single time! Some symptoms showed up at different times, some appeared in only one or two out of the three.

@ChloeN my symptoms were so similar to AF feelings, the only thing I think was that my ‘AF mild cramps’ started a few days earlier (like 7/8dpo) for both times I was pregnant, whereas I usually get AF feels starting on dpo10/11.

@MrsCristiano so good isn't it! Really cheesy in places but a good watch to pass the time 🤣. Your posts crack me up, glad you've got through Mission Schlong and you're now in your TWW.
Cd8 for me, 1st DTD complete, 6 days til ovulation if it's the same as last month...the countdown begins 😮‍💨

@FfayeN I don't envy you lovely! DH doesn't like to know I'm ovulating so it's a mission 😂 he's so bad at timed sex

Yeah it is really good! Nice and non dramatic for going to sleep 😴

Hi ladies I think I joined on one of the last threads and lost track! I had an mmc late March and MVA just then. We’ve been trying half heartedly for a while and last month again properly, I just started my AF which is so disappointing. Really hoping next cycle is the one. I don’t know if any of you feel this way - I am 35 and really feel like the clock is ticking! We are trying for our first child. I figure if next month is not successful we will go to GP as will have been trying six months with no success

Morning! Sorry to hear all of your unsupportive friends and family stories ☹️ It can be a horribly isolating experience.

Welcome back @pangolin84 So sorry for your loss but glad you’re ok (or as ok as you can be under the circumstances). Enjoy all the 🍆! 🤣

Hey @Annapolis35, I’m sorry your af got you ☹️ and for your mmc, I had one too and it was awful. Praying for a bfp this month! Xxx

Morning all. I am not having a good day today. Starting to feel quite depressed again 😕 and I’ve put on weight this week because I’ve been comfort eating so feel like a failure in that area as well 😔 CD18 and still just totally negative OPKs, I was having some ewcm but that’s gone now

Hey @LuckyMoonstone, sorry you’re feeling this way. First things first, you are NOT A FAILURE!!! Having mc was not your fault, you could not have prevented it and it does not make you a failure. Comfort eating when you have been through what we have is a totally normal way to deal with grief and nothing to be ashamed of, I’d be surprised if there was a single person on this thread who hasn’t done that lately! Plus if your hormones are all over the shop you’re bound to be hungrier. I know none of that actually helps how you feel right now but we’re here if you want to talk about it and just know that you’re not alone.

Strange about the opks, is there a chance you might have ov’d but missed the peak? The EWCM suggests you were fertile so maybe the peak was just really short? Hope you’re ok xxx