Fertility Appointments and Beyond: Electric Boogaloo

[thislittlebird]

Hit capacity on the old thread, will tag you in!

@99pctpractice thank you :)

So baseline scan went well, 8 on left, 10 on right. Have been given the go ahead to start stims this evening! I'm surprised next scan isn't until Wednesday next week, although have a blood test on Friday to see if things are ok. I'd have thought they'd want to monitor me more than that.

Hi everyone. I havent posted since my negative test so catching up. Had an appointment with the consultant today which I asked for before the NHS boot me out of the system. They're going to give me another AMH test and she doesn't think they can give me anymore treatment. She said if I want to start going privately then to get cracking and she'd recommend three or four cycles of stims back to back... This just isn't financially possible for us. Who does this??

Frustratingly no idea why the last round was so awful - apart from the fact I seem to respond poorly to stims. Little consideration that my partner's fertility could be the issue and why hadn't they tested it more?

I don't know what to do. I think DP would happily knock the whole thing on the head.

@tinkerbell098 good luck as you start stims. I hope it's bearable for you and you get good results.

@thislittlebird interesting stuff on the micro biome thing... Will have to do some reading.

@kay00 good luck to you too as you start!

@jeanieJ did you book in with Ramsey? Hope it makes a good difference for your partner

Sorry I've been quiet, been scared about starting again and needed some time off 🙈

@tinkerbell098 we can be buddies! I'm on day 3 of stims!! Your baseline sounds ace! Hope things go ok for you :) whens your egg collection likely to be? Are you on the same stims all the way through?

@beyondshit what even is the charge for that?! Like is it 'just' one full ivf cycle charge (so my cycle is somewhere between 6 and 8k), and then 3/4 sets of drug charges (so for me, thats another 2k)? Thats crazy money as it is, but if each cycle is the druga plus the full cycle charge 🤯 did they say anything about a payment plan or those funding companies you can use?!

@thislittlebird thats really interesting! Hopefully it might change things a bit for you x

@bebeckyCarlos Full cycles, so £10k x 3/4? So £30-40k probably more, plus £5k for every frozen embryo transfer.

I'm not coping very well. I'm not sure I can be at work.

@Beyondshit I'm so sorry. Nobody ever seems to know why it didn't go to plan. My initial 3 cycles (booked as 3 cycles) ended up costing £25k in total. Not sure if I could have done it cheaper if it was scheduled as batching rather than individual cycles. It's not cheap - though pales in comparison to the £15k I spent on one round at Argc.....the clinics have literally taken all our money 🤣

My oh last night basically told me that he blames himself for not pushing me harder to start trying when I moved jobs and didn't want to be pregnant immediately after starting. I feel responsible anyway, so not helpful to know that he views it as being my decision to wait and therefore my fault that it hasn't happened for us. Lots of tears. Both of us are just very sad and don't really know what to do next. We are starting to think about donor eggs but it just depresses both of us to think about it. Plus scraping together the money for another round that still might not be successful (even with donor eggs we could come out with nothing) will be a struggle.

@beyondshit jesus fing christ. Maybe try a consult somewhere else?! My consultant was very frank from the start, this is our second and final go with my eggs, if this doesnt work I just dont respond to IVF (and drew the short straw husband wise, if his stuff was 'normal' we'd probably have two kids by now) and will need donor eggs (although I know thats not for everyone). I'd call in sick from work for a couple of days if you can, this is real and it hurts and it definitely warrants some time x x x

@99pctpractice I have to pinch myself when I get the 'I should have...' thoughts, its so hard isnt it x x x

@Beyondshit that's crazy! I still don't know why NHS won't pump more money into IVF. Who has that kind of money to spare especially if that money is going to be needed when you do finally start a family. I'm so so sorry about what you're going through. Definitely take some time off work, you need it.

@99pctpractice I don't think anyone should regret the decisions they made at the time, as no one knows, it could go either way, and you only make those decisions with the best information you have at that time. It's just so unfair and cruel that we have to go through this.

@beckyCarlos yey! IVF buddies! Egg collection will possibly be 26th Sept. When is yours? They will do a blood test on Friday and depending on that will adjust my stims. So I won't know. I'm on 300 IU Menopur in the eve at the minute.

@timkerbell098 I'm scheduled for w/c 19th, but anytime that week, on my long protocol I had about 16 days of stims 😅 but hopefully this won't be that long! I'm tajing 450 meriofert for 6 days, then 450 ovaleap for at least three days after (im acared about ovaleap, theres cartridges and a pen!)

@beckyCarlos that's great not too long to wait now. When's your next scan?

@99pctpractice I hope so, can't face more nonsense! Annoying your DH said that. Not sure that's helpful really.

@Tinkerbell098 glad you've started, hope the stims went well! The NHS not funding more IVF is false economy imo. We have an increasingly old population and a low birth rate, the ivf babies will pay for themselves. But as with everything, there's no long term planning, just cost saving and rationing of services.

@Beyondshit could you do it with BPAS or an NHS clinic like Kings? Would be more like 3-4k per stem cycle rather than the higher prices, not including meds. BPAS also do free initial consultations so you could chat to them. I understand your DH not wanting to do it, it's a lot of stress. We're going to pay for two rounds privately with Access but I don't think that lets you do back to back, you have to complete a cycle and then do the next.

@beckyCarlos Exciting! EC isn't long now!

I have my double transfer on Sunday. I said to my husband I feel weird about it. It's something we do and not something we're hyped for. Ambivalent, going through the motions feeling at this stage. I'm self medicating, which isn't ideal, but I know some women are on pred and aspiring/equivalents as standard so I'm going to take a low dose of both through the transfer phase.

Also going to try to schedule an October private clinic appointment in case this fails.

@bebeckyCarlos Yes the consultant mentioned donor eggs to me and my instinctive response was absolutely not... I just don't see myself going down that road. There's so much to think about with IVF and the ethics of it aren't there. The whole process has made me think about surrogacy, donor eggs and sperm... I think I've decided against it all.

@thislittlebird everything crossed for you for your transfer! Let us know how you go x x x

@beyondshit I think you know, deep down, immediately if its for you. My husband is a flat no to donor sperm (not that we need it), theres something about genetics for him, but he's on board with donor eggs if I am. Your own personal lines are funny arent they. I'd happily have donor eggs (but have a big fat self pitying cry about it), but I'm not sure I could get behind surrogacy.

I'm about to preface this statement with something I hate 'I'm not a doctor, but...' maybe do one round, see what changes can be made, and take it from there? You really do just need one egg, and pumping yourself full of drugs and spending ALL that money might not be necessary. I know @gracie202 did back to back stims but she's in Ireland and the funding is different, but she might be able to say why it was suggested.

Hi guys, Hope you don't mind me landing back in momentarily. Reading away in the background with the fingers crossed for everyone. Best of luck this Sunday @thislittlebird!!!!

So sorry you're being hit with such bad news @Beyondshit! We're based in Ireland so obviously costs are different but we did two back to back dual stim cycles that averaged one embryo each time. We maxed out stims, trialed testosterone priming, estrogen priming, HGH, adding clomid and a number of other things across the different cycles. Each dual stim in our clinic was €10k so €20k for all of that plus additional drugs costs etc. Massively expensive and if things hadn't gone to plan or we went through our embryos, we were then going to move to donor egg. For some reason similar to @beckycarlos, I could get my head around donor egg but not surrogacy. No logic to it but think everyone has different views/feelings. If we were moving to donor egg, any additional procedures etc were going to be done elsewhere in Europe where prices are cheaper as tbh we're broke after shelling out approx €30k in total over the last couple years, mainly in back to back rounds earlier this year. Not sure if this is any help to you at all but happy to chat through some of what we tried or next avenues we had planned etc if it's any help at all. Other options might be that some clinics do a kind of insurance plan where you pay something like 10k for a guaranteed number of rounds/result 🤷‍♀️ no cheap of doing it though from what I've seen but going abroad (prague, athens etc) seems to be much better financially too.

Hi ladies.

@Beyondshit just as a comparison my current IVF round with an NHS clinic in Devon has cost £4240 and the meds were a grand total of £294.52. So just over 4.5k. It's not cheap by any means, but more affordable than a lot of places.

@Tinkerbell098 @beckyCarlos good luck with your stimming! My baseline scan is on the 23rd, so I'm not far behind x

Crikey @kay00 those drugs are cheap! My ovaries must be really broken 🤣

Oh hello @Kay00 👀

what meds did you get for that? I’m assuming it might be a bit more than yours, I’ve assumed £1-2k

Thank you @Gracie2021 and @kay00 for the info.

I took this afternoon off, told my boss I had some personal stuff to deal with. I don't know if I can face tomorrow - due to be in the office. But I feel things are only going to get worse so if I need time off I should save it. Relationship teetering.

Wishing you so much luck @thislittlebird for your transfer. All of my everything crossed for you.

@Beyondshit I’m sorry the relationship shit is happening too. It’s really crap. Could you have a break and spend a bit of time together and see how you feel in a couple of months? Definitely take time off sick if you want to.

thanks, my expectations are low but time will tell.

@Beyondshit maybe it would be nice you and your OH do something nice together, to help take your mind off things? It is such a difficult process xx

My meds are ridiculously cheap 😅 I think it's because I'm on a low stim but I get...

Meriofert 150iu x 10
Cetrotide 0.25 x 5
Cyclogest x 45
Progynova x 2
Diclofenac x 1

I already had left over Northisterone and I guess I'll be paying for my trigger separately?

@Kay00 where did you get them? I was on gonal f once per day for what, 10 days? Can’t remember how long you stim for. Then Fyremadel, and then Cyclogest. Obviously might be on more next time but attempt one wasn’t a lot of drugs.

I had a trigger left, it saved me the princley sum of £7 🤣 my meriofert bill is sooooo much bigger 🙈

@beyondshit feeling all mixed up inside and 'pain' in your heart is no different to vomiting everywhere or having one of those colds where it hurts to move your head off the pillow. Just because its not 'physical' doesnt mean you should feel bad for taking time off (she says...knowing its bloody hard, and also feeling like shes letting everyone down when she takes a day). X x x

I agree with @beckyCarlos , your mental health and your physical health need to be looked after xx

The pharmacy are online, called Fertility2U they seem pretty good and the meds are delivered promptly to my door.

@Kay00 that’s the one I get my NHS meds from actually

Ha ha - @Kay00 your ovaries must be in much better shape than mine, I was on 600 Meriofert/Fostimon for 12 days and spent way over £3k in meds in total in my last round. But then Argc throw everything at it in terms of blood thinners, lubion plus cyclogest etc. so I don't think it's representative!!! Previous rounds had been more like £2500 I think (450 gonal f was my standard dose at my last clinic).

@Beyondshit I'm sorry you're dealing with relationship issues as well as all the fertility sh1t. my oh and I have had a very rocky few weeks so I can sympathise. We've had some very difficult discussions which it might have been better for each of us to have independently with therapists (!) but it has helped us work through things. I think it's helped that we've also done some things together that don't involve any fertility chat. I hope you're able to figure things out. Definitely take some time off work if you can't - hopefully you get the extra bank holiday too! Sending big hugs.

@Beyondshit sorry to hear you are also having to deal with relationship stuff. Definitely take some time off to be together and really hope you two can figure things out. Lots of love X

@Kay00 that's an amazing price! I was expecting medicine to cost about £2k!

@beckyCarlos how's stimming going? when's your next scan? I'm not having any scans until Day 10! they said a blood test is all they need on day 5 to see how everything's going. How ridiculous!