MC avengers, still eating cake, 2008 WILL BE OUR YEAR!

[ronshar]

Hey ladies I have been brave and started new thread.
Aquababe will not have to look at her thread opener again.

hi all and thanks for words of support. it doesnt look good - - just passed an enormous clot and lots of red blood - like a period (sorry for tmi esp. around dinner time). i think this is it as i cant imagine to be bleeding this much and still have a viable pg. (but feeling very sick - so i know how you feel woose!)

for those who mc'd naturally - how long does it take for the whole thing? is it like a heavy period? (i am 5 wks). last time i mc'd there was no bleeding and discovered at 10 wk scan and went for erpc the next day.

Hi everyone, hope everyone is doing well. I havent been on in a while. I had a mmc in dec 07 and I had my first af on 18th of this month. I was hoping to get pg again quickly but Ive changed my mind and Im going to leave it a couple of years and try again. I dont know how to sprinkle baby dust but i wish everyone well and hope there are loads of bouncing babys in 2008

Sorry ive just read down this thread a bit bunnyinheadlights, hope you are ok. the bleeding and passing clots is horrible. its not fair

Just a quick msg to say still no AF! I'm 14dpo, and my longest luteal phase ever was 14 days... so I'm starting to wonder, especially as my temperature went back up yesterday and again this morning. You know when you want something really badly though - I am probably just imagining this and AF will be here tomorrow.

Sorry for not going back through the thread. I will try to catch up properly at the weekend.

Sorry to hear that Bunny. Yes it is like a heavy period but with more 'material'. It can get very painful towards the end so be prepared for that. Get lots of treats in and lay on the sofa under a blanket and rest up as much as you can.

aqua glad to hear dd is on the mend.

sfx so is that what happened? The last bit came away with your period and you were ok?

hackney so sorry I don't know the answer to your question, but I hope it is reassuring that you have already found one person who has been the in the same situation (IYKWIM) {{hugs}}

woose as has already been said, I am sorry to have to type this, but with my mmc the sickness and the sore boobs stayed and got worse between scans. I think it is because although my baby wasn't developing the placenta was still connected and that was developing I guess, hence I didn't bleed. So sorry hun, hope it's different for you. My experience with my first mmc was that once it was confirmed for definite I was told I could either wait and let things happen naturally or I coiuld have an erpc. Having some idea that when they said the mc would be the same as a period that was bcks I had no desire to go through that and went for an erpc as soon as they let me. It was painless and very quick. You do have a general but I was only under for 10-15mins. Definitely the right decision for me but everyone is different.

Things no good here. Not a surprise but still very . This is what I wrote in the ttc thread:

Had the mc confirmed by the doc today as hormone levels have fallen but I have to go to the hosp for a scan on tuesday... CAN'T BELIEVE I HAVE TO WAIT TIL TUESDAY!! Know scan will be a total waste of time, REALLY don't want one. But don't want to just wait to mc at home either (no bleeding so far, touch wood...) so I guess I'll just have to put up with it. Am just worried how long they'll make me wait...

From my (mainly MN based) research it sounds like the recurrent mc clinic at St Mary's in Paddington is THE place to be. Heard really good things about a consultant there called Raj Rai so have booked a private app with him there on 12th June (gulp at price...) Spoke to GP about it today, she said my local hosp won't even consider looking at me after 2 mc () but I don't have a lot of faith in them anyway. She said to come back in May and she'll refer me elsewhere if I want, to try to save me money! Very sweet of her, and I suspect quite unusual! She also said she thinks I'll be pg again by then but not sure how I feel about going through it all again at the mo. Am convinced that the same thing would happen again as my 2 mc's have both been so incredibly similar. Will have to see how I feel when the dust settles. xx

Hi Kate

So sorry it has been confirmed, and it is so cruel that it is a drawn out process. So had to understand how such a traumatic event is prolonged for so many women.

Pleased your GP has some sense and will help you.

{{hugs to you too}}}

Sorry to hear your news Kate, hope your gp and Dr Rai can help, but hopefully you won't need their help, by May/June.
Bunny, I bled a lot with my m/c, a lot more than a normal period. Bleeding started on Wed, I had an erpc on the Fri and had a lot of bleeding and some clots by then. Still went ahead with it as I wanted to know it wasn't going to go on for days afterwards, but everyone is different. Hope you're ok.
Any news yet Verso?
Aqua, I was at A&E for several hours this morning as dd2 fell on in the playground at nursery and put her teeth through the skin below her lip. They've glued the skin together rather than stitches and she should be ok in a couple of days, but she was of course hysterical when the dr was trying to do this . I managed an hour at work before this phone, so she is now asleep and I am enjoying a peaceful half an hour before going to get dd1 from school Good news about your fibroid and that you can start ttc again whenever you are ready to.
Any news Woose? I had a blighted ovum m/c in Aug, where the sack forms but the egg doesn't continue to divide, so your body thinks you are pregnant, but the sack is empty. I was sick, tired, not fitting into anything, and had no idea until 12wks that there was no baby. Really hope for you that your body is playing tricks on you and that everything is ok.

God, meant to say ISN'T playing tricks on you, Woose

kate sorry to hear your news.

hackney like you when I went for the 'confirmation' scan I was told there was a tiny bit left, to look out for infection signs but that it would come out with following AF.
my 2nd AF has just arrived, have had no problems at all it all seems normal GP thinks it is all ready to go iyswim.

I have my 39th birthday this weekend and I am actually feeling positive after a low start to the year, we hope to start ttc quite soon

hi to everyone else too.

Kate So sorry to hear your news I know you were half expecting it, but it doesn't make it any easier to bear. Especially as you want to try to cling to every bit of hope... I'm also sorry that you've not been able to get the referral you were hoping for, but hopefully the recurrent mc clinic at St Mary's will be able to help. Isn't that where Dr Lesley Regan is based? I found her book really helpful. (((hugs))) to you.
Sfxmum Happy birthday for the weekend! Are you doing anything special?
Bunny I had a natural mc and I bled heavily for about three days, although I'd had light spotting for 4 days prior to that. It then tailed off and continued for a few more days. The first day of heavy bleeding was quite painful, but after that it was OK. I found it hard from the emotional point of view though, to realise that this was the end of the pregnancy. With my mmc I also continued to have symptoms even though everything stopped developing at 6 weeks (I found out at 13 weeks). I just couldn't believe nature could be so cruel and that my body continued to believe I was pg for so long I also had a small piece of tissue remaining after the mc but the doctor said that as it was so small my body would probably reabsorb it and it wasn't worth doing anything about it (i.e. ERPC). AF arrived 29 days later.
Verso Keeping my fingers crossed for you!
Hello to everybody I've missed.

Hi everyone, any requests for cakes today?
Kate - sorry to hear your news, having to wait is such a nightmare.
Verso & Woose - hope your feeling a little better today
SFX- happy birthday, hope you have a lovely weekend, good luck with the TTC.
Aquababe-glad to hear things are getting better for you, it's nice to have some good news, hope your dd's finger heals quick
Bunny - so sorry to hear your news, will still keep fingers crossed for you.

cece I thought I would pop on to see how you are. I also had a bloody tinge to my cm after I lost my last baby almost until my first period started. If you are at all concerned talk to your gp, they really won't mind you asking things like this.

kate just wanted to say how sorry I am. My 1st 2 mc's were identical also. I was told I would have to have 3 mc's before I could be referred. For me it was 3rd time lucky thankfully and I now have a DS. Unfortunately I have had another mc while ttc no2. I just wanted to wish you all the luck in the world and I really hope it all works out for you next time.

Jules your post made me cry- good luck to you as well lovey.

Hi everyone
Kate. I am really sorry things have not worked out. It is a tough time. Thinking of you, and everyone else who is going through it at the moment.

Ni news at the moment, but after reading all the messages about blighted ovams and mmcs it does not look good for me. However, I think I have made a decision and that is if things don't work out at the scan next week I an going to wait to ttc again until next year. I don't know why but I think I have been putting myself under pressure to have another baby so that the age gap between the two is not too big 2-2 1/2 years. I think this is because that is the age gap between myself and my brother and sister, and DH and his sister, but there is no reason why I need to follow this pattern. Siblings will still get on well if there is a bigger gap wont they? I am dreading questions from MIL 'why don't you have another now, otherwise it will be too late'. I need to do what is right for me. I don't want to make myself depressed again. I think that I need to put myself first and try to do some lovely things with my family this year, and do some good things for myself too.

Things with DS are still very full on and when he is a bit older things may be easier. He will be more independent. At the moment he still cries when I leave the room for example.

Sorry for long post, hope this makes sense
xx
Have a good weekend. I really want a take away tonight, but not sure if tummy can cope!!!

Kate very sorry to hear your news. i too am having a mc as i write, my 2nd in 3 months, and i am finding it very hard to believe. i too started this one (and the new year) with lots of hope and positive thinking and truly thought the last mc was a one off, a chromosonal abnormality that wont repeat. but sadly it is not to be. and it's really gutting to have one's hopes crushed. i really hope you find the answers with the private consultation. if the bleeding hasnt started, i would go for the erpc (as i had that the last time, and it was really not that bad) instead of having to wait.

woose my sister and i are the bestest of friends and we have a 3 year 7 mth gap. we had a fabulous time growing up and we still do crazy stuff together. it seems like you have reached a good place in your head for moving forward if things dont work out. but still keeping fingers crossed as you never know...

thanks everyone else for sharing your experiences. i spent all night cramping and passing clots (sorry again for tmi) and the bleeding has increased today to the point where i am actually wondering how a physically small object (uterus at 5 wks) can hold such high volume of liquid/material.

it was a very hard day today as i decided to go into work (house being reno'd with lots of builders and importantly, no loo facilities during the day as the water is cut off). needless to say have not told anyone at work - didnt tell them when i mc'd in nov at 10 weeks either. had to grit my teeth and smile and look happy whilst rushing to the toilet every 20 mins. had a good weep in the toilet by mid afternoon then had to hide for longer till red eye effect disappeared. dh wanted to rent a hotel for me to go rest in for the day - in hindsight i should have done that.

justjules thanks for your touching words and good luck to you too - i had another good weep when i read it. i thought how does she know what i am going through?

i guess after 2nd mc i just want to know Why it happened. and why me. what have i done wrong in the world to deserve this? all i want to do now is crawl into a dark cave and stay there for the rest of the month...

apologies in advance for the length and depressing tone of this post.

have just been reading up on what to expect when mc at 5 weeks. can anyone who has had a mc at 5wks let me know whether i should expect to pass the sac/embryo too? i just thought that it would like a heavy period and now m scaring myself that the worst has not yet come....!

Thinking of all of you having tough weekends
Woose, my dd's are 3yrs 8mths apart and get on brilliantly. My sisters are 6 and 9 yrs older than me so I wanted smaller gaps than that, but didn't want 2 in nappies, so it worked well for us.

kate and woose - sorry to hear you are having a rough time.

SFX - Happy Birthday for the weekend.

Goingfor3 - Hi! Thanks for checking up on me. Not sure what is going on but very tender so maybe just a painful ov!? No more pink/brown stuff so will leave it to see if the pain returns with next af. How are you? How many weeks now?

Bunny So sorry to hear about what you're going through. Hope you've been able to relax today and that your builders aren't working at the weekend. How awful for you to have to go into work.
I also mc'ed at 6 weeks (although not detected until 13 weeks IYSWIM) and I didn't notice the sac either, as Jules said. Hopefully the worse is over for you now, fingers crossed, although if you feel you're really bleeding very heavily then you might want to go to EPU/A&E just for reassurance. (((hugs))) to you.
Woose My sister and I have a 4 1/2 year age gap and we also got on fine, although it was a bit more difficult when I became a teenager and she was 5 years behind. However, once I was in my early twenties it was fine again. Some children with an even bigger age gap also get on very well, whereas others who are closer in age don't, so you can never tell. Do what is right for you and forget MIL's comments (easier said than done I'm sure!). Fingers crossed things work out for you though.
Hello to everybody else and happy birthday to sfxmum.

Hi all
Had a stressful day today, feeling rubbish but trying to carry on as normal. DS has been over excitable and emotional today. He went to a birthday party and won the fancy dress costume competition so well chuffed. Felt so proud!!!

Bunny. I mc at 6 weeks last time and it was like heavy period. For about 4 days I think. I could not tell that there was anything other than large clots. Must have been tough at work. Very brave of you to carry on. We women have to be so strong don't we?

I know what you mean about the feelings of what have I done to deserve this. I felt like that too. At the time I felt as if I was being punished because I was not a good enough person or something. I still feel that way sometimes. I know that is not a healthy way to think but when you are so emotional these things enter your head.

I think it would be fine to have a bigger age gap and it make sense to have one out of nappies.

Hi all, just wanted to thank you all for all your messages of support. It's really sh*t but WE WILL GET THROUGH THIS. Sometimes I need to type that to try to convince myself that it's true, because it doesn't really feel true at the moment.

Bunny so sorry to hear that our situations sound so similar. So sweet of your DH to offer to hire you a hotel room. Feel free to come round here if you fancy some company, let me know when you're on your way & I'll put the kettle on! Do you have any children yet or are you trying for your first like me? I had an erpc last time too, def want to go that way agains if I can but I suppose it will all be down to the hospital.
Hope you're feeling better today {{hugs}}.

good morning ladies many thanks for the birthday wishes.
I did have a lovely weekend with family who were all lovely, had a party on Saturday and on actual birthday Sunday went out with dd&dh.

I am sorry a few of us are having a difficult painful time , particularly those going through miscarriages.
I spent the months since my mc worrying about time running out, about the bigger age gap than intended, about what I had done wrong, etc.

I have decided to look after myself for the next few months and try and relax and hope the rest will follow easier said than done but huge stress not helping.

hugs to all