Hoping to get our BFPs in January ✨

[Decaffe]

All welcome to come along for the ride and lots of support along the way!

Checking in at 5dpo, no symptoms yet!

@Moonshine160, @Hopingforarainbow27, @mightbeyesmightbeno - I'm in both of your boats... trying for a second child and have had a couple of MCs trying. It's making me slightly loopy.

I feel like my life is in limbo - if I knew 3 years from now that I would or wouldn't have had another baby, then cool, I'd just process that and get on with life. It's the uncertainty - and uncertainty about a big life-changing thing - which is so tough.

Thanks @jazmine38 - I don't know that I've ever noticed having sore boobs mid-cycle before. But it's crazy the things you become aware of when TTC

@Shortmamashortcycles yes yes and yes to your second paragraph!!!!

@Hopingforarainbow27 I should start spotting on 17th then AF full blown next day or two. I guess I will test on the 18th but I don’t think I will need to. I think I can really tell if I'm pregnant. Last two times I knew something wasn’t quite right and the nausea breast soreness already started around time my AF was due that would be 14 days PO for me. Gonna try and occupy myself until then. Lets hope for the best fingers crossed I guess.

[quote Shortmamashortcycles]**@Moonshine160, @Hopingforarainbow27, @mightbeyesmightbeno - I'm in both of your boats... trying for a second child and have had a couple of MCs trying. It's making me slightly loopy.

I feel like my life is in limbo - if I knew 3 years from now that I would or wouldn't have had another baby, then cool, I'd just process that and get on with life. It's the uncertainty - and uncertainty about a big life-changing thing - which is so tough.[/quote]
So true - the headspace this has taken over the past year I can’t even begin to put a value on. I’d say the first seven days of a new cycle are when I’m most relaxed. But then fertile week is focussed on DTD enough/at the right time. Then in the TWW I am totally obsessed by it. I’ve tried not to be, but I am. I am distracted at work, I can’t concentrate. 8DPO onwards is the worst. I hope against everything that this month will be different, but it never is.

On NYE, I asked DH what he wanted in 2022. He said, a baby. He said he thought that shouldn’t have to be something he wishes for though. As other people, in his words, “decide they’d like a baby so they have one and get on with their lives.” Whereas I feel I haven’t just lost two years of my life to Covid but I’ve also lost a year to the heartbreak of TTC. And the worst bit? There isn’t even an end date on it. It’s so damn hard @Shortmamashortcycles.

(Did a FRER this evening on six hour hold and back to white again so guessing I’m out, hence feeling so damn frustrated and fed up.)

Just to make clear - DH said that because he, like me, is also feeling frustrated - it all just feels so unfair and it’s starting to get to us now. I think he’s totally right. We just don’t ever seem to have things go our way that so many others take for granted!

@Decaffe I know how you feel. I'm sorry your feeling this way. It's rubbish!

@Mariabombia I have tried to research it many times but it doesn’t seem a very common thing - most people I know just get the cramps a few days before AF not for the whole two weeks! Glad I’m not alone. I can’t really remember if I had it when I got pregnant with DS or if I’m just really hyper aware of it now that I’ve been TTC for a few months.

@Moonshine160, re the cramps - could it be digestive cramps, not AF? In my case, I have IBS and progesterone really slows things down in my TWW. It often means I get AF-like cramps when AF isn't close at all.

@Decaffe, oh love. I know exactly what you mean. It's so utterly unfair that some people have the easiest ride with conception and others don't. It feels like you're failing at something that others do with such ease. But it's not a failure, it's just luck. Sending you a massive hug.

Same here 3 dpo and getting brown discharge too not sure if this is a sign as it’s too soon to symptom check

I'm so sorry to hear that's how you're feeling @Decaffe I can completely relate to it. Our ttc journey for #1 was long and hard. We started getting gp investigations at 18months in, and ended up with a referral to fertility clinic, more investigations and finally had a reason that we were struggling and a plan to try clomid for a few months before moving onto a cycle of ivf.... I think I must've actually relaxed a bit that month as miraculously I got a BFP before I even started the medication. Keeping everything crossed for you that you have your baby this year!!

@Shortmamashortcycles same here with the just wishing there was an answer to it! I know how unbelievably lucky i am to have my DS but trying so hard not to fear my journey for #2 will be as hard as #1!!

@Moonshine160 I had 3 months after my dd between the pill and getting pregnant, but a lot of your symptoms by the sounds of it. The first month I had so much pain I made a doctors apt. I swear I felt my whole uterus move. It was swollen, too painful to dtd etc. I had constant back and pelvic cramps until my period. I was relieved to get it and the pain left right away. Second cycle was better, but I still had ovulation cramps and then after some back cramps I felt this weird pricking on one side only for hours a day, maybe I’m crazy but I think I could feel the egg moving down the tube/irritating it. Again, it went with my AF arriving. The third was more like the first if I’m honest without the weird uterus moving feeling. Did you say you already have one child? Before my DD I didn’t get as much as PMS so feeling all the ovulation stages was very overwhelming.

Thanks @madeleine85 that’s reassuring to hear. Yes the cramps tend to subside when AF starts! I’m fine until immediately after ovulation and that’s when the pains start, both in my back and my front now whereas before I had DS I’d only have them in my front.
Yes I have one child already. I think I’ve made myself paranoid that my fertility has taken a huge decline since having him!

@Moonshine160 my guess is we’re either more in tune with our bodies after birth, or it’s something weird body memory from birth. The back pain post ovulation reminded me of the back pain I had in the days after labour. Bodies are so strange! The main reason I joined mn was to see if anyone else had experienced the cramps I was at the time my first cycle, and someone had, so you’re definitely not alone.

@Mariabombia I also experience pelvic cramps in 2nd half of my cycle! Even when not TTC. I put it down to womb lining building up due to progesterone but not sure why I get it? I’ve had 2 children so I don’t think it has an effect on fertility for me.

@saltedcaramelanything yes I have the boob thing post ovulation! Mine become reeeeallly sore on the day or two after ovulation (actually makes having sex tricky as they hurt!). They then seem to calm down for the rest of the cycle but remain slightly sore. I often use it as an indicator I’ve ovulated and for me it’s always happened, even before TTC.

Okay so might have called myself out a bit early! Think I can see a squinter of a line today at 9/10dpo. What do you guys think? I don’t want to get excited as it’s 1st month trying for our 3rd and I’ve had chemicals for. Will stay on here for the next week until after AF due as I won’t really believe it until then!

@Bringonbaby3 that's not even a squinter!

That's not even a squinter @Bringonbaby3 !

Interesting about the sore boobs. They seem okay this morning, but were sooooo sore yesterday. Will DTD tonight just to make sure we've given it every chance. But think I'm now in that annoying TWW

Congratulations to everyone with a BFP, very excited for you all!

@Bringonbaby3 I can definitely see a faint line, fingers crossed for you!

@Decaffe sorry you are feeling down about everything, I could see a definite line on your test yesterday so it must be very disappointing. As you were only 10dpo are you sure you are definitely out, it's still fairly early days? I can totally relate to what you are saying and even though I'm earlier on in the TTC journey, it is already starting to take over my life. I also find the FW is taking up with obsessing about OPKs and when to DTD and then the TTW is just constant symptom analysing and taking tests far too early!

@Bringonbaby3, I can see it too! Everything crossed for you. 🤞🤞🤞

Well that's the bleeding started following the ectopic. So not sure if I count this as day 1 and we can start trying?!! Although we haven't dtd at all this year!!!!

Congratulations @Bringonbaby3

@Purple29 yes I would count it as day 1. Wishing you all the best in this new cycle 🌈

@Bringonbaby3 I see it! And would say that pretty strong for 9ish days PO!🤞 for you!