Remember remember the month of November as it’s the month I’m getting pregnant 🎉✨

[Mummytobe93]

Hello everyone ✨🎉

I’m starting a November thread after being unsuccessful this month, got some spotting so probably cycle day 1 for me today, with fertile window being in the first week of November.

Please join me if you’re as hopeful about fresh cycle as I am!

My main goal is to DTD more, we definitely didn’t make the most of it in October …
I’m therefore going to be 100% honest with DH that we need to get down to business this cycle.

PS. Hope you like the title 🙈😂😂

Xxxx

Yeah I just feel like even if I do get pregnant again I know I won’t have the joy that other people do. I lost mine at 6 weeks and 9 weeks. I’m waiting on bloods to come back which take 4-6 weeks but they say usually they are fine and it’s just “bad luck” :(

@Bundaberg84

I'm so sorry *@LittleMysSister* for your loss! I felt absolutely the same way like you when I had my chemical. I wasn't suspecting anything, the BFP was a bit of a shock to say the least and in a way it wasn't "real" yet in my head if that makes sense.

Yes this totally rings true for me. None of it felt true to me last week, it was such a huge shock.

I wonder if the lack of the hormones to make the symptoms start happening with a chemical can impact our feelings too? Or rather, impact a lack of maternal/nesty feelings because the hormones aren't necessarily firing quite right? Who knows.

I guess that can't be true as I know lots of people don't get any symptoms throughout successful pregnancies, but it gives me a bit of comfort to think maybe the fact that my body knew it wasn't to be meant that I wasn't experiencing what I might have been if it hadn't been a chemical.

@Brunette1989 I’m so sorry to hear of your loss and sorry to hear you are struggling.

I definitely feel like there is a lot of pressure as a recently married 31 year old as we’ve had people asking if babies are on the cards straight after the wedding (which was only in July!).

I am at the start of my TTC journey (cycle 2 for first baby) but I’ve definitely found reading and discussing things on here so helpful. It’s comforting to know that so many others are going through the same things as you. It can be quite lonely when only your partner or a few people know you are trying.

I think TTC is quite frustrating because you’re taught as a teenager/young adult that having sex once means you will get pregnant, when it’s in fact incredibly difficult.

Really hope everything works out for you though and sending lots of positivity your way 💕

Maybe this will help a little girls,
@Brunette1989

I too lost a baby in June, I was 9 weeks.
I’m 42 in a couple of weeks. I’m fit and healthy and having regular periods, they are slightly skewiff after the MC - I got some blood taken today to see if anything going on that needs fixing.
I had bloods done in April that came back ok- it was a week after that I got my BFP

@Brunette1989 there are lots of things you can try to assist your BFP. With my DD I was taking Pregnacare and using the Clear Blue ovulation sticks. I got my BFP on the third cycle. The first two cycles I was taking my temperature, obsessing about it and testing early which was turning me into a mental person! Third cycle, I stopped taking my temperature, chilled out and didn’t do a test until the day before AF was due and it was a BFP! I’ve just started started cycle 2 TTC #2. Cycle 1 I was testing early again and driving myself mad, now I’ve got that out of my system I’m not going to test until AF is due. Take each day at a time and try to think positive, I know its hard though x

@Brunette1989 Hey, welcome :) Sorry you're feeling low, I know it's so hard.

Last month for the first time I used some PreSeed internally, and also inserted my menstrual cup after DTD in fertile week. I have been using OPKs to track my ovulation since September. I had been taking Pregnacare Conception tablets for the past 6 weeks.

I don't know if any of this actually helped or not but I got my first bfp since coming off the pill in May. Even though it ended in a chemical, I feel some hope that we managed to conceive at least :) So might be worth a shot for you.

@LittleMysSister interesting thought. I also thought that maybe it was intuition. Sometimes you just 'know' things even though you can't explain it or grasp that thought until after the situation occurred?

@LittleMysSister Yes agree. I know it's probably a load of rubbish as I'm not usually a superstitious (or whatever this would be) person but you just never know do you? Our bodies are smart so I wouldn't be surprised if there is some level of inbuilt disengagement for some people when the body knows an early loss is looming right from the start.

I'm not superstitious but I strongly believe in intuition. The thing with intuition though is that you can't make it appear so to speak, and at least for me it's hard to pinpoint if I just manifest something I want to be true if that makes sense.

@littlemysSister
so sorry for you loss but I totally agree. I had a MC before I had my DD and I just knew it was going to happen before it did. I didn't want to really talk about being pregnant or anything related to it. When I conceived my daughter it was totally different. I had a feeling that everything was going to be fine this time, I knew I was going to get a bnp and even after DTD I had a feeling that this was it! It was the strangest thing.
Altho now I am on CD27, 10dpo and don't have any symptoms or feel anything so I have pretty much ruled myself out this month before AF has even arrived as I don't feel the same way I did with DD. 🤦‍♀️

I also believe in intuition especially when it comes to our bodies - they tell us a lot on a subconscious level. It's why it can be so frustrating when you go to a medical professional to say something is wrong but you can't articulate what exactly. You just know it's not normal.

I really felt the anguish in your message @Brunette1989. It sounds like you're blaming yourself for not knowing more or doing more. Yes there is stuff we can do but so much is down to chance.

If you're anything like me you like feeling in control (think that's why I love OPK testing so much it makes you feel like you're doing something). But so much of TTC is outside of our control. Every fertility window that passes I find myself analysing what I should have done differently and wondering what's going on in my body. I just feel so out of control and I hate it!

I’m one of the lucky ones (so far) to have not experienced a MC or CP. So sorry to read so many stories of loss 😢 sending love and prayers to you.

If anyone else is TTC #2 (or 3 etc!) what is your age gap looking like/the ages of your children? My DD is 2y 4m - such a fun age!

@Brunette1989 sorry to hear about your loss! I totally get what you mean though, some of the things some people try, I admire them! I haven’t given much a go yet, 4 months in, but only 2 with OPKs! I think today is ovulation day, so about to start my TWW, and hoping I don’t go crazy this time! I told myself last month that I need to chill out!

@dory0 same. I symptom spotted last cycle and drove myself a bit potty!! Im currently 10dpo and promising myself to not test until I'm actually late to save myself the heartache and stress.

@ohmybaby I'm currently ttc #2. My dd will be 6 y old in January. This pregnancy when and if it happens will be dh first baby we got married 10 days ago (which timed beautifully with predicted ovulation day )

@ohmybaby I am ttc #2. My DD is 4 years old at the end of this month. She will make the best big sis. 💕

Hi ladies, how are we all doing?
I graduated from the October thread but unfortunately suffered from an early miscarriage 2 weeks ago, at around 5 ish weeks. I was sent for a scan and there were no further complications, I think it was classed as a chemical pregnancy.. Unfortunately this is our second loss this year 🥺
Not really tracking this month as not sure what to expect, although the midwife did say I would probably ovulate as usual so no need to wait if we feel ready to try again. My first loss was in January at 16 weeks, I feel like I am right back to the start with our journey but 100 times more anxiety and upset 🥺

Anyway, I wanted to rejoin the thread as you lovely lot offer so much support and kind words. Sending baby dust to you all. Over 600 messages so im hoping there are some BFP comments in there ❤️

@LittleMysSister @Peonies94 thankyou both for your kind comments. I've found reading the comments on here helpful to not feeling alone

@MindZGap thankyou, and you're completely right. I blamed myself for the loss even though the nurses and everyone told me it was sadly one of those things and quite common as heartbreaking as it is.
It's just so overwhelming, like someone mentioned before it's always said to go on contraception as it can happen so easily. So when you come off contraception and nothings happening I feel like I'm doing something wrong and it's breaking my heart.

I've been taking pregnacare conception every day. I have tried the ovulation tests (just cheap ones as moving house so worried about cost) and didn't get anything from them as to when was good to go.
I just feel like I want to be doing everything I can but worried about the pressure that could put on. Just don't know what to do for the best, so any suggestions on this from anyone would be appreciated.
Sending love to everyone

@Missy95 sorry to hear that. It's never easy to have a loss at any stage. Sending you hugs and best wishes for luck in the future.

I'm currently 10dpo/CD26 and promised myself I wouldn't symptom spot... but just been to the loo and noticed some very light spotting on the toilet paper, just brownish discharge/blood - sorry tmi I know. My cycle length does vary between around 27 and 31 days so this could be AF but I usually get really severe cramps for a few days before AF and I've only had very light cramping since last night.... could this be the elusive implantation bleeding? Has anyone else actually experienced this? Holding out for testing as if it is implantation I'm likely to get BFN still until levels start to rise and could still be out if it is AF on her way a bit early...

@LittleMysSister I’m so sorry to hear your news. Good that you’re feeling in an ok headspace about it right now, and keeping everything crossed that you get a sticky little bean very soon.

Welcome to the new joiners!

@Brunette1989 I don’t think I can give any advice as to how to get that elusive bfp, but I would really advocate trying to look after yourself as much as possible. It sounds like you’ve had a really difficult time of it, and I totally understand the frustration and self-blame that comes with every af. But just try to look after yourself in the meantime; I am sure it will happen sooner or later, and along the way you need to make sure you’re ok and not being driven mad by it all!

Sorry for being a bit quiet of late - I don’t have much to add to the bbt/opk chat, and seems like that’s where lots of people are at right now.

I’m about 7dpo right now (my best guess!). Could do with a sanity check please!!! Have been flat out exhausted the last few day. Asleep at 9pm the last two nights - which I don’t think has happened to me for about a decade (I’m a night owl!) - and had to take a nap in my lunchbreak today!

I KNOW it is so physically impossible to have symptoms at 7dpo. But I just can’t help wondering….

Aaaaaagggghhh!!! Please someone tell me I’m being ridiculous and need to calm myself down for at least another week!

@Nico89 with my DD I got my BFP and had implantation spotting the day after (the day AF was due) sending lots of positive thoughts your way!

@Missy95 so sorry to hear this. It really is devastating.

I’m so glad we have community here that we can share our thoughts with and know we are not alone

I’ve told myself this cycle I won’t track ovulation and I won’t test early….. 🙆🏼‍♀️ As i become obsessed and can’t think of anything else. I’m hoping we all get the best Christmas present yet!

My 1 year old is sabotaging our TTC. He decided to sleep like a newborn last night, up every 45 mins 😴. I know it's only the first cycle trying but I really don't want to miss the fertile window so going to have to power through with the help of caffeine and wine this week 😂.

@Missy95 I am so sorry to hear of your loss, I'm so sad for you after reading your post.

@Brunette1989 I'm sorry for your loss also. Life can be incredibly cruel. I lost twins at 19w and my son neonatally so I understand a bit about your pain. I do think sometimes things don't happen when we're extremely stressed though. Have you considered counselling for what you've been through and are still going through? Just for the record, you're far from being 'too old'. I'm 39 and some ladies here are a little older than me. I just wish I'd met my DP years earlier and had our babies with him earlier in life BUT I've had times in my life when I've been seriously (and at one point, critically) ill and I don't think I would have coped. I do think some things happen for a reason.
Are you cycle tracking with OPKs? We will support you so please keep posting.

@LittleMysSister I do wonder, and am a big believer in instinct, like @Bundaberg84 said - intuition. Maybe we have a sense (possibly a maternal one?) that things won't work out which is why we sometimes feel disconnected or disengaged? I hope I'm not speaking out of turn here - I'm sorry if I am.

@Nikkic2123 I'm so sorry you've suffered a loss too. What sad news I am reading tonight. It seems us ladies have a lot more in common than just TTC. I like to think at times we share a bit of a bond having suffered losses, like a sisterhood thing. I really hope things work out for you and thanks for sharing the inspirational quote!

@ohmybaby my daughter is soon to be two, but she was born 4 months early and has developmental delay to some degree so really she's developmentally only around 14 months old. The so-called 'terrible twos' haven't hit us (yet) but I'm expecting the next year or two to be a bit full-on!

@Digby86 in my early stages of pregnancy I was sooooooooo tired. I don't think you're reading too much into this and I have my fingers firmly crossed for you this cycle! Nearly time for you to think about testing. Any idea when you might cave?

Phew, this is a long post so I'm gonna hit send before I manage to lose everything I've just typed. Again. On a quick personal note, I'm 3/4 DPO and nothing to report at the moment. Literally, nothing. Just glad to be having a break from DTD if I'm honest - like the bliss of getting into bed and falling into an instant deep sleep is just the best after a busy day!