Help ttc after miscarriage

[Sunnyxo]

I’m currently going through an early MC/ectopic (doctors not yet sure). I’m still spotting and in constant cramping pain which will be my second week of these symptoms this Saturday.

I’ve read that some people ttc straight away in their next cycle and to base the first day of bleeding (miscarriage) as their first day of the cycle.

Personally I don’t think I’m yet ready to ttc again as still in pain, and really exhausted physically and emotionally.

But if I did want to try again this cycle, I just wondered about ovulation etc? I’m still getting positive preganancy results so my hcg levels are still remaining, does that mean I can ovulate at the same time and will OPK tests work?

I’m really confused with it all so any help or advice would be really appreciated.

Thank you

Hi OP, I'm so sorry to hear about your miscarriage. It's a horrible time and I remember from my own experience of this how strong the need can be to get pregnant again quickly. Be prepared for the possibility that it might take your body a little while to get back into the swing of things: I don't think I ovulated at all in the cycle following either of my miscarriages. If that's the case for you try to prepare for that first post-miscarriage bleed with some distractions and treats and try to think of it as an opportunity to let yourself grieve and recover physically. Lots of people do get pregnant again straight out of the gates though, so fingers crossed you'll be lucky (if that's what you decided you want).
In answer to your question: no, if you've still got hcg circulating you won't be ovulating again yet. You'll need the miscarriage to complete and for your body to clear itself of hcg before the usual cycle of LH and FSH fires up again to get ovulation going. It sounds like so far you've only had spotting but not full bleeding? If that's the case you should count the first day of your cycle from the first day of full bleeding.
I hope it's all over soon and that you can start to put it behind you. Sending you lots of sympathy and

Hi @RoseAndGeranium thank you for your message and sympathy. Sorry to hear you have also experienced MC, it is a sad time. Thank you that’s really helpful response re the hcg and LH, that makes sense. I think as you say, I will just wait a while and let my body get back into the swing of things. Ah no I did actually have full bleeding last week, starting 2 weeks ago this coming Saturday. I just thought it was my period though, as it was regular in terms of start date, length etc. It stopped Saturday just gone and then started bleeding/spotting Monday, took a test and to my complete shock it was positive but my bloods taken at the gynae clinic, showed very low progesterone, so been advised it’s early MC or ectopic. Just waiting for it to be back to normal, hopefully soon!!

Ahh I see. Poor you, that sounds really confusing and upsetting. Hope it sorts itself out soon so you can move on and stop worrying about the possibility of an ectopic. Are they going to offer a scan at some point to check on that?

Thank you, fingers crossed will all be okay, they scanned Monday just gone but couldn’t see anything and asked me to come back this coming Monday to take my bloods again and I think also scan… Hoping it’s not ectopic!

@Sunnyxo fingers crossed all is ok with you?

I went through a chemical pregnancy in July, I was in complete agony for 4/5 days. The GP told me to let my body rest and signed me off work for 4 weeks. I decided to let my next cycle come to see if there was anything different or unusual. I'd also got my first covid jab mid August too.
Thankfully AF arrived as my flo app predicted, with nothing unusual and now I'm currently in my 2ww.
Timing is completely different for each woman and you're the only person who will know when you're feeling up to ttc again.
Personally for me I went for this month as I'm anxious that I've just recently turned 35.
Keep us posted 💜xx

Thanks @GingerbreadTM hopefully should all be okay!

So sorry to hear about your chemical pregnancy, hope you are okay?

That’s reassuring to know that your cycles went back to normal! Sorry what does 2ww stand for?

Best wishes for this month! I’ll keep you posted what happens, keep me posted as well! xx

@Sunnyxo 2ww is the abbreviation for 2 week wait for AF after ovulation.
I ovulate the week AF leaves me not the 14 days after as they say.
I didn't want to use ovulation kits etc because I didn't want to take away the spark from my relationship or make my partner feel as if it will a be a chore in bed lol so I downloaded an app called FEMM it helps you track your cervical mucus and it will guide you on your fertile window.
I also follow 2 ladies on Instagram the hormone health coach and the fertility detective. They have some great tips and information.
My chemical was the most awful thing to experience for me, but I have a great partner, family and friends who all are very supportive.

I find comfort on here as there is always someone or many going through the same as yourself and everyone is so nice. I'm new to Mumsnet about 2 weeks now xx

@GingerbreadTM ahh I see! Lol I completely hear you on the spark bit, that sounds like a good app to have, I’ll have to have a look into it, I’ve been using Eve to track my cycle so far but it doesn’t really track cervical mucus. Glad you’ve found something that works better for you than the OPKs.

Ooh I’ll check them out on Insta too! Always handy to have more information.

So sorry to hear about the chemical, sounds like you have a great support network around you though 🙏🏻

My partner is very squeamish so he’s supporting as much as he can but agreed it’s great to be on here to chat with others who can relate, and I’ve already learnt so much! High five to also being a newbie! Think I’ve been on here about a week now 😊

How long left do you have of your 2ww? xx

I had a chemical after well over a year of ttc and having no luck , I was devastated and wasn’t even considering trying again,I stopped using ovulation sticks and wasn’t fussed about having sex at all .

It was the anniversary of it yesterday which was hard but I was so lucky to have conceived the next month. I had a period in between.

It made pregnancy very hard , especially when I had two bleeds but my dc was born a week and a half early and 10lb + and healthy.

@whoknew23 yes it's so deflating and takes a lot out of you mentally, emotionally and physically. I'm trying to remain positive but have a wee moan and a cry when needed. I am so happy for you that you have your baby and all was well. 🥰 how old is your baby now?xx

@Sunnyxo I never imagined him to be so good, he's a big worrier too but thank goodness he's been strong too.
We are heading away today for the weekend for a break, we both work in the children services arena where it's quite hard to work with children on social services child protection register. My first week back to work has been a wobbly one 🙈
I've 9 days left of my 2ww so the weekend away will hopefully distract me from symptom checking too because I'm obsessing about every twinge and nausea feeling and it could be all in my head 🙈🤣xx

@whoknew23 that’s a real shame you went through that, hope you’re doing okay after yesterday. Biggest congratulations for your healthy baby though! That’s so nice to hear xx

@GingerbreadTM awh bless, it’s needed to have someone strong there for you too. What an amazing job you both do, but I can imagine must be really difficult. I think wobbles are expected, I went into the office yday and ended up having a wobbly, thankfully I was in a private work booth so had some privacy lol. Hope you have a lovely weekend away and yes best to completely to forget about it for a while if you can and relax as much as possible😊 it’s so easy to become obsessed with the symptom checking, things that I would’ve just shrugged off before end up googling as a sign for the last few months!😂 Xx

I'm sorry for your MC @Sunnyxo - did you get any scan results yet?

Hi @Bundaberg84 not yet, they scanned internally Monday but couldn’t see anything so have asked me to come back this Monday coming up. I did another pregnancy test today just to see if my Hcg has gone down, and the line was barely visible compared to other day so i’m hoping that means it’s not ectopic… but I’m no expert keeping my fingers crossed🤞🏻

@Sunnyxo fingers crossed for you as well!🤞

@GingerbreadTM
Thanks, my dc is 9 weeks old ,

It is such a hard journey, doesn’t help when you are ttc and people around you aren’t trying and end up pregnant🤦🏻‍♀️

@Sunnyxo

Thank you , it is such a hard journey ttc. I naively thought it would be easy .

Fingers crossed for you .

@whoknew23 oh all I see is baby bumps everywhere I look!
My sister had a baby a few weeks ago, my 2 brother's are going to be dads in the new year, 5 cousins are expecting and my 2 best friends announced their pregnancies 4 weeks apart 🤯🤯🤯🤯🥺🥺🥺🥺
That's why I'm away for the weekend in a wee caravan in the middle of nowhere in Donegal and the owner of the air bnb is pregnant 🙈🤣 I feel as if I'm the only one who isn't expecting!

Here's to a positive month for us all 💞xx

@Bundaberg84 thank you!

@whoknew23 it really is, I don’t think it’s something I ever thought or really understood how hard it was until now but thank you, best wishes to you too!

@GingerbreadTM wow that’s a lot of people around you expecting! 🤯🤯Hope you had a lovely time in Donegal, and definitely here’s to a positive month for us all! Xx

@Sunnyxo we had a great time thank you ☺️ relaxing bath when I got home, as they say a Sunday well spent brings a week of content lol
Sorry if I'm wrong but I think I remember reading that you've got ab appointment tomorrow. If so best wishes/good luck and I hope you'll be ok 💞xx

@GingerbreadTM awh glad to hear you did! 😊 sounds like a lovely weekend!

Thanks for the wishes, had my appointment, they just took a blood test so waiting for them to get back. I barely have any cramping but still bleeding same level as a period,just want it to stop now feels never ending, been nearly 3 weeks 🤦🏻‍♀️Xx

@Sunnyxo I hope you're ok I'm sure you're feeling all sorts of emotions right now.
I'm having a very wobbly week, yesterday would've been my booking appointment and my GP's surgery didn't update the system. The maternity unit rang me and asked why I didn't show for my 12 week scan and I had to explain that I contacted my GP to advise that I got my negative pregnancy test a week after bleeding. They were absolutely horrified and kept apologising.

So there was plenty of tears yesterday and today! Completely exhausted and struggling to speak to people.

I hope you're ok xxx

@GingerbreadTM thank you, I’m okay, think I just need to stop googling stuff and worrying myself out about how long it’s been😬

Oh no I’m so sorry to hear you went through that the other day. It’s not nice to have it brought up again. I hope you are okay too, get lots of rest and try and have some you time, what about a spa pamper night? Stay strong and here’s to the next month being a positive one for you, sending lots of wishes xxx

@Sunnyxo thank you so much 🥰 I did test there this morning BFN I'm due my AF in 5days so we'll see what happens in that time.
I did get my first covid vaccination in August so that could also have messed things up for me too 😭

How have you been feeling??xx

Hi @GingerbreadTM, sorry for the long response, how are things? I’ve heard a few of my friends mentioning the COVID vaccine has skewered there AF’s slightly!

I’ve been okay thanks, still bleeding so it’s been 4 weeks now which I’m getting a bit worried about , but the hospital have said that’s normal though. My blood tests show that the levels have dropped substantially. Xx

@Sunnyxo we've both obviously needed a wee break away from this as I've just saw your reply there now sorry 🥺

I really hope that you are ok and that your bleeding stops soon.

I also hope you're getting plenty of rest and indulging in some guilty pleasures such as Netflix binging etc

I am due my 2nd covid vaccine start of October and I'm dreading it because I can't cope with anymore delays ☹️ however I will continue in hope as my friend who had been ttc for 8 years conceived 2 weeks after her 2nd vaccine. It was such beautiful news to hear from her. 🤞🏼💞xx