TTC, Help! Feel like I’m trying everything!

[Mynameisunavailable]

Hello everyone,

I’m a newbie! Mid-30s and TTC as got married later than intended. So AF came yesterday and I feel so deflated! It’s our third cycle (I know it can take longer) but I’m just really frustrated as it feels like we are trying everything:

• DTD on the day of ovulation and two days following that and trying to every other day leading up to ovulation (pink ovulation tests)
• DTD sorry TMI orgasm before he comes
• Basal temperature
• Superseed lube
• Multi - vitamins
• Legs in the air after DTD. I know it’s only a myth but anything is worth a try!

Is there anything I’m missing? Or should be doing differently? Just feeling really low and hormonal with AF . Any tips would be much appreciated. Thank you in advance

Hi @Mynameisunavailable! It seems like you're covering all your bases :) how is your vitamin intake?

Thanks @Bundaberg84 . I’m not sure if I’m overthinking it all.

I’m taking the Boots branded trying to conceive vitamin tablets, the Pregnacare ones made me feel not so great and made my boobs hurt!

Are you using OPKs that give you your LH levels? Or just the smiley face ones?

I found the LH level ones that are plotted on a graph really useful for fully understanding my cycle. I guess you might be getting that detail from temping though anyway.

If you’ve only just started DTD before ovulation that will make a difference aswell. Ideally you want the sperm waiting for the egg when it’s released. 2 days after could be too late.

Does your DH smoke or drink much? That could be worth considering as well.

Best of luck OP

@Mynameisunavailable it's hard not to overthink it. And you did everything right. Just keep in mind that there is only a 20% chance of getting pregnant each month, even though you did everything "right". And it's considered normal for a healthy couple to TTC for up to 12 months until there's a BFP. That doesn't mean you won't get pregnant in cycle three or so. But it's not science, we're not machines, and every body is different.

@PinkPlantCase I’ve been using the Clear Blue ovulation pink tests which only give the smiley faces. I’ve just ordered the digital advanced one as thought I’d give that a go too ! I’m trying anything and everything lol!

Do you suggest getting the kits that test LH levels too?

Would you suggest DTD every other day after I’ve finished my period? Until I’ve ovulated?

We both don’t smoke and hardly drink although tempted after AF came yesterday !

I'm in the same/similar boat. I'm 34 years old and we have a 10 month old, conceived in our first cycle.

We started ttc again at the beginning of this year due to my age and fell pregnant in February, which unfortunately ended in early miscarriage.

Since then nothing, we're just about to go into our sixth cycle ttc.

I'm also taking every vitamin under the sun (very expensive!) , put my legs up in the air, follow the SMEP. We will use preseed this cycle to see if it makes a difference and I'm contemplating using a mooncup to push the sperm up further.

It's so disheartening, especially when time isn't on our sides xx

@Bundaberg84 Thank you . I think I’m being too hard on myself. Need me some baby dust magic !

@Mynameisunavailable @EnjoyingTheSunshine don't stress too much about your age. Almost all my friends conceived with 36 or older and have perfectly happy, healthy kids. The whole journey is stressful enough, don't let the age factor stress you more. Yes, according to statistics it will get harder to get pregnant the older you are, but that doesn't mean your chances are getting low. Just lower. And many will get pregnant with 40 or older.

@EnjoyingTheSunshine sorry to hear about the miscarriage.

I’m trying not to worry but disheartening when you feel like you’ve tried everything.

Hang in there, they do say it happens when you least expect it. Hopefully soon 😊

I’m on cycle 6 of TTC my second, I’m 24. We got pregnant with my DD after 7 cycles.

Also using the clear blue digital ovulation tests this month. Finally got my positive 9 days before AF!

Hoping we’ve caught it this month but I know how you feel with being deflated.

It will happen, we just need some more patience.

Thanks @Bundaberg84, I know two relatives who’ve just conceived at 39 and 40. Just harder when you feel it’s easier for everyone around you and you’re trying everything.

Chocolate for breakfast to cheer me up I think !

[quote Mynameisunavailable]@EnjoyingTheSunshine sorry to hear about the miscarriage.

I’m trying not to worry but disheartening when you feel like you’ve tried everything.

Hang in there, they do say it happens when you least expect it. Hopefully soon 😊[/quote]
I'm also trying grapefruit juice this cycle, drinking one glass a day. Stuff is vile 😂

Thabk you, I'm sure it will happen for you very soon.

@Mynameisunavailable

Thanks *@Bundaberg84*, I know two relatives who’ve just conceived at 39 and 40. Just harder when you feel it’s easier for everyone around you and you’re trying everything.

Chocolate for breakfast to cheer me up I think !

But then you don't know how long it took them to conceive. That's what I always tell myself. Even if they conceived within the first month, they might have just been lucky and caught that "good month" right at the beginning.

Is grapefruit juice supposed to help?

Poor hubby, he doesn’t know what to do with me, had a little cry to myself yesterday!

Yes, hopefully for both of us soon

@Mynameisunavailable

Is grapefruit juice supposed to help?

Poor hubby, he doesn’t know what to do with me, had a little cry to myself yesterday!

Yes, hopefully for both of us soon

@EnjoyingTheSunshine

@Bundaberg84 you’re right! Thank you. Sometimes the mind doesn’t always think logically. I really needed to hear that. Thank you

You need to orgasm after DH has - the contractions propel the sperm in the right direction! 3 months is nothing so keep going and it should happen (it took 8 months to conceive #1 aged 35 and 27 months to conceive #2 aged 40). You could try a fertilily- it's like a mooncup but specifically designed to keep sperm at your cervix

Hey just wanted to say not to put too much pressure on yourself - ultimately these things can take a bit of time and it's unlikely to be due to you doing/not doing one of the things on your list.

I would ask though why you specifically O before finishes? The recommendation is to do it the other way around as the contractions help the swimmers up.

How's your EWCM? If not noticeable then maybe add evening primrose oil to your follicular phase.

How long are your cycles - how long is your FP/LP?

Sugar can have a massive effect on fertility (for both sexes). Giving up sugar and refined carbs seemed to help when DH and I were struggling to conceive.

Is your partner also taking the conception vitamins? I think you can get his and hers ones from Boots.

Do you exercise? Not scientific at all (!!!) but both times we were successful it was when I'd continue running and exercising during the two week wait.

Good luck op, it's not been long trying but the process can feel like forever because we have no crystal ball. Xx

@Juno231 @BabyMoonPie I’ve been trying to O before and after but it doesn’t feel as strong after he comes sorry TMI! Would you suggest trying to O after and scrap before?

Sorry what is EWCM, FP/LP? I’m new to some of the acronyms.

My cycle is usually 28 days and luteal length is 14 days.

@Mynameisunavailable what I'd also suggest is taking Q10. And if it doesn't help, at least your skin will be nice :)

@dohdohdoh yes he’s been taking the wellman vitamin tablets although he really doesn’t want to! Not sure if it’s a bloke thing, my brother in law was the same!

I’ve started being more active, power walks, jogging etc. We are both hoping to join a gym soon. Thank you x

Grapefruit juice is supposed to increase ewcm ( egg white cervical mucus, your most fertile mucus during your fertile window)

@EnjoyingTheSunshine I think I’ll have to drink it in one gulp with my eyes closed 😀! Thank you.