Trying to conceive over 40

[October1979]

Here is a new thread for us girls

Hi there
I am 40 and we are ttc our 3rd. I was 29 and 33 with 1&2. Wish we hadn’t left it so long but for various reasons we have.
With baby 1&2 I was lucky enough to get pregnant the first month, but this time we are 4 months in (which I know is not a long time for most) but I am really worried we have left it too late!

Using the clear blue fertility sticks (didn’t use them previously). I wonder about my cycle. Appears to be 25-26 days long but I bleed for 10 days (brown spotting first few days, then fresh after).

Looking for some hope! I feel time is rapidly running out.

Any advice welcome :)

Thought we'd missed our window to try this month, but I got a tiny bit of spotting 8dop. My period has been coming 12-13dop, but on day 14 it still hadn't. This morning I was up early to ride, but felt properly nauseous and have slightly tender boobs (15dpo). Did a test and it's come up positive. Have messaged the girls to say I won't be riding out this morning. My partner is still asleep. Can't quite take it in.

Congratulations @ponymum1980!

Sadly I did a repeat pregnancy test this morning as had some painful cramps yesterday and it's negative so looking like another early loss for me which is really sad. I'll repeat the test later but not expecting positive results.

Oh no @Mattieandmummy I’m so sorry to hear that. Sending lots of hugs your way, and fingers crossed for the later test.

Yes but the positive is I can now have my covid vaccine without panicking about possible miscarriage (even though there's no evidence to say this happens).

There's a lot of sighing over here and a few tears.

@Mattieandmummy sending love and fingers crossed for you x

@Mattieandmummy oh am really sorry to hear this. Was feeling really optimistic for you. I know how sad you must be feeling. Sending a big hug. Take care of yourself xx

@ponymum1980 fab news, congrats!

@babyreds1518 hello there. Your cycle sounds similar to mine, I always have brown spotting for a couple of days before fresh. Try not to stress (easier said than done!) you are only 40 and 4 months isn't long at all. My GP thought me getting pregnant in 9 months was quick. With my DS I conceived first attempt, I think that's unusual and gives you a false idea of how easy it is to conceive.

@Jem1979 I’m not sure if I’m working this right.. not sure I saw your full message but thank you v much for replying! We have has sex on the flashing smileys (2 days), then the 3 days from the static smiley. It’s totally taken the fun out of it! I’m worried about age and I don’t know why really?

@Babyghirl welcome! We’ll let you off the couple of years as the challenges really are all the same anyway! There’s an over 35 TTC thread full of lovely women too if you’re interested. www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/4307394-TTC-35-Thread-12?msgid=109660416

@Mattieandmummy oh I’m so sorry. Sending you lots of love xxx

@ponymum1980 YAAAYYYY!!!! ❤️❤️

@babyreds1518 hi! have you been checked for endo?

I'm sorry @Mattieandmummy it's so cruel when that happens. Sending you lots of love.

Congratulations @ponymum1980 hope everything goes well for you.

Thanks everyone just took myself off to the covid walk-in clinic as a distraction, now going to get cake.

Oh no @Mattieandmummy I’m so sorry to hear this. It’s such a heartbreaking thing to go through. I hope you’re ok. Cake sounds like a great idea. Xx

@Geriatric1234 Hi! No I haven't been checked for that.. I looked up the signs, not sure I really have any of that tbh

@October1979 probably best to wait if you didn't feel ready anyway, it's so hard to know! Hope you're doing ok

@Babyghirl hi and welcome, sorry to hear of your losses. I was taking aspirin for two months but have pretty much stopped everything this month including tracking as none of it worked amd I'm finally getting my gynae appointment tomorrow!

@Lastyearttc that's great news about it more than doubling and the scan 🤞🏻 for you

@babyreds1518 welcome, four months in is definitely not long, I've been told not to start counting af until the first day of full flow. You can speak to your doc after 6 months of trying to request tests though

@ponymum1980 congratulations!

@Mattieandmummy so sorry, it's so hard to take the repeat getting your hopes up then them being dashed again

@geriatric1234
Thank you for the welcome
@Marvellouslymadmum
Thank you I don't track stopped that after my October loss and fell again in Jan got my follow up appointment for gyno on the 15th of September also on the list for ivf said I would get an app in abot 3 4 months time hoping it happens and sticks before then thou.

@Babyghirl you'd have to track a little if you were planning aspirin after ovulation though

@Mattieandmummy so sorry to hear you've got a negative now, life is just so cruel sometimes. I hope you can move on quickly and try again real soon xxx

@Marvellouslymadmum
I norm ovulate cd11 get the pain and that to go with it then nxt day my cm goes thick like school clue lol, I done my temp for a good while always temp dip on cd11 and rise nxt day and a 16dlp.

@Babyghirl does sound like that's the case for you, I've certainly learned that nothings definite with this though! I used to think the same, that I knew what my body was doing - turns out I didn't have a clue! I get some months like that, some months where I get failed ovulation so all the signs, pains positive opk etc but that happens 3-4 times before ovulation happens. I also have a changing Lp so all over the place but hopefully yours od more consistent!

@Marvellouslymadmum
My period showed up this morning last 3 Septembers I have falling pregnant maybe September is my month I'm hoping anyway lol.

@Babyghirl @babyreds1518 welcome!
@ponymum1980 congratulations!!
@Mattieandmummy really sorry to hear your news. It’s so rough when that happens. Why can’t a positive be a positive!!

I’m all confused today - got my peak opk on Saturday at 9dpo (which is v early - normal 13dpo) along with some fertile cm - but not a lot 🙁. My temp this morning has really confused me! Took it as normal time 6.45am and was 36.41 - which is a small rise from my average over last 3 days of 36.26. But then I took again at 7am before getting up and it had gone DOWN to 36.35?! I thought it was supposed to increase once you are awake - tried again after a shower and 36.31! So I’ve no idea now if I ovulated. Guess will have to see what tomorrow brings but we are off on holiday in the morning so I know it will be chaos!!

I was cooking chicken today when the smell absolutely made me gag for some reason. Took myself off to the toilet for an afternoon 6 DPO wee on a FRER stick which was unsurprisingly completely negative

So I binned the chicken just to be safe in case it really did smell funny

Told myself I wouldn't go mental this time round but it's hard. I let myself take a test whenever the urge strikes, I just tell myself it's not going to be a +ve and that's ok.

I'm taking the advice from this thread that I may only have one good egg a year and that nothing is guaranteed

Thanks again everyone, I might not say much but I do appreciate it. Have tied myself in knots over the last week in fear at being pregnant again. I'm sad that after all the therapy and hypnotherapy I've had, I am still frightened of being pregnant again. Huge sighs over here, wondering again whether adoption might be a better path for us.