Recent MC - New cycles & trying again Thread 2

[AMS19]

Previous thread

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/4184729-Recent-MC-New-cycles-trying-again?pg=1

A thread for all the amazing strong ladies who have recently experienced a mc/mmc but are braving it to try again! Fingers crossed for a lucky one for us 🍀

@glowingtwig

I’m so sorry, my heart goes out to you. I’m sorry the EPU aren’t being more helpful. Do they not have different rules for people who have had previous losses?

I had a scan at just over 5 weeks but I’m not sure if that was because of my history of ectopics.

I’ve had multiple losses so I know that feeling of being a failure but as others have said that’s not the case at all. It’s terribly cruel to be in that 1%. Are you under the recurrent loss clinic? I was just wondering if they could get you in for a scan at the EPU.

I really hope you can get a scan soon.

Xx

Thank you @Ralala I've come up to bed early and I've had to take paracetamol even though I never do when pregnant. I just want to be asleep but I know that when I wake up I'll remember and it's so painful.

That's a good point actually @Badlydrawngirly I will try calling the consultant who I saw after the last mc to beg if she'll see me. I have the name of her secretary so I'll try her. I've not been technically seen by her recurrent miscarriage clinic yet as the waiting list is so long but she might at least scan me.

Hi ladies

Just saying hello as I guess I’m almost ready to TTC. I’m having to do ovulation tests so that we can book my NK Cells biopsy. It looks like that and my day 21 test will fall over the Easter weekend though so that’s annoying!

Had my day 3 bloods done last week and they look ok apart from my TSH which is 9.6 but still in range and I think ok for almost 42?

I had acupuncture with a great fertility specialist today and he was quite reassuring that we can get the TSH down. He also said that I’m anaemic so I’m going to start high dose iron tablets. He said that blood stasis can lead to endometriosis and adenomyosis, which I have and is obviously not great for ttc.

I feel a bit more positive that there are things I can do to help now but I’m tempted to TTC this month. I’m on CD 9 and had my third flashing smiley today and am getting EWCM too. I know I shouldn’t try until I’m in better shape but it’s so tempting!

@glowingtwig oh you mustn’t blame yourself for any of this or feel any guilt. You’re doing absolutely everything you can to give your little girl a sibling and there’s every hope that will happen! ❤️ If it’s not this baby (and I so so so hope it will be and have everything crossed for you) you’re seeing one of the best specialists and you will get answers/ help. It’s so frustrating the EPU won’t see you, it just doesn’t make sense to me why they wouldn’t seek to offer you some reassurance or clarity after your losses 😢. I really hope the HCG bloods give you a clearer idea - and some good news. Please don’t worry about work or your students, a few days off is not the end of the world. It’s much more important you take the time to look after your own well-being xx

@glowingtwig

Definitely contact her secretary. I did that as soon as I found out I was pregnant as the first Dr I saw at the EPU didn’t prescribe heparin even though my consultant said I must have it straight away.

The secretaries are usually really helpful and the consultants in the recurrent miscarriage clinics do tend to be more caring and aware of how stressful this is.

Please don’t worry about work. Put yourself first.

Fingers crossed for you.
Xx

Does anyone track their resting heart rate? My heart rate has been up during the tww. Noticed today it’s dropped. AF due Friday so that would be consistent with hormone changes for AF yeah?

@Badlydrawngirly @glowingtwig not to be a Debbie Downer, but when I spoke to EPU after my miscarriage, I did ask about recurrent mc clinic and scans - they said usually you'll get the routine ones but because of COVID they're only scanning if there's a need to ie. symptoms that need monitoring... I wonder if that's why they're refusing to give you one earlier?

@glowingtwig I know what you mean about the sibling issue. I cried and apologised to my LG the other day because I can't give her a sibling ☹️ but it isn't our fault and we need to try and pick ourselves back up again... easier said than done but you do need to be kind to yourself x

@Ralala I track mine but tbh it's all over the place. Last month was my first full month of tracking, it went up after ov, and then stayed a bit higher but kept going up/down so I don't think it's a clear indication? Just out of interest, have you noticed any patterns with yours? Do you know how to pinpoint ov? I had two potential dates I thought for ov but don't know which one it was last cycle....

On subject of tracking... what apps do people use? I use a combo of Glow and Femometer at the moment but not that happy with it.

I’m just catching up on everything, firstly @glowingtwig I had tears in my eyes reading your messages, my heart aches for what your going through!! Did you sleep ok last night? I Really hope you can get a scan sooner! To echo the other awesome woman warriors on this thread you will get there and have your rainbow. My friend said if your not where you want to be then its not the end, keep going lovely!! 💪🏽💓

Ladies, have any of you experienced thrush when pregnant? I am cd14 or so (really trying not to track tooo much as I get anxious). And today i have developed thrush (groan), but. And there is a but, because in my 2nd pregnancy around the same day14 I got thrush which sadly ended in MC.. I’m trying not to get hopeful, but maybe it could be a good sign, albeit uncomfortable. We dtd every other day for 6 days, so could also just be too much lovin’ 🤷‍♀️

@Ralala my rhr increases up to ovulation then slowly decreases back down after. However when I was pregnant it started to pick back up and stayed high. I dont think it's anywhere near as reliable as temping but a decrease down towards AF date can indicate AF is on its away yes

@Sleeeeeepy if you're temping Fertility Friend is by far the best app. I also use premom to scan in opks as it has the clearest view for progression. But input all my data (temps, opk results, when we've had sex, cervical mucus, etc) into Fertility Friend so you can clearly see everything in one place. But as I say, only good if you are temping!

@glowingtwig hope you managed to get some sleep. Thinking of you xx

Cd29 and bfn this morning for me. Af due on Friday. Fingers crossed it comes and I don’t have another crazy long cycle

@AMS19 @cupcakesandglitter thanks! I haven’t tracked my RHR before. Just been watching it on my watch. Yesterday was the first day it’s started to come down. I had started to rise when I noticed EwCm.

So what I thought was the start of AF on Saturday may have actually been implantation. I've had this with FMU this morning as thought I'd check after more of a light bleed on Sunday (only on wiping once) I haven't had anything else. Flo app said my period would have been due yesterday (again not sure as it was my first post MC)

I'm so so nervous as this is straight after my MC. Keeping everything crossed but just don't know how to feel.

I'm sorry if this is triggering, I don't want it to be.

@glowingtwig sending you the biggest and warmest hug. I really hope you are able to get hold of the consultants secretary and get a scan. I know this may have been mentioned before but if EPU won’t help you what about a private scan? I’m not sure how much they would pick up on the scan but it could be worth a go? Xxx

Thank you @DMT1982 ❤️ the private scan I had last time was a horrendous experience which I'm not keen to repeat. The sonographers and nurse obviously just wanted to get home and the whole place was like The Disney Store full of celebratory pregnancy announcement- style merchandise and teddies lining the walls where you could insert a recording of the baby's heartbeat etc. It was awful 🙈. I suppose I could try a different company. I spoke to the consultant's secretary and she said she couldn't promise anything but she would try to get the consultant to ring me. Not sure if today or tomorrow but warned I might not get a call, I suppose it depends on how busy they are. @Badlydrawngirly the consultant did seem more attentive when I saw her after the last mc so fingers crossed because it was Christmas Day she might remember me and see me for an earlier scan.

@AMS19 I slept until about 1:30am then I think DD called out and woke me up. I managed to sleep another few hours after that but then that awful feeling of devastation when I woke up again.

@SuzieDeLaTour thank you for your lovely words and thoughts. I'm just feeling so helpless, it's so out of my control. I can't believe how awful the EPU is, it just feels like they don't care until 7 weeks and won't help me at all. They just sound really bored on the phone.

@cupcakesandglitter im trying really hard to be positive but it's so gutting not knowing. And trying to be kind to myself but then this self-hatred of my crap body kicks in and I'm awful to myself. And I know that none of this is going to help the pregnancy so that then makes me feel more guilty and round and round I go.

Thank you @Jujujuberry that's a lovely saying that your friend has... I'll try to keep repeating it over.

Congratulations @Sugarskulllover that's so exciting for you. Please keep sharing the good news... it gives me hope xx

@Ralala I track my RHR, mines usually sits around 54/55 pre pregnancy, during the first trimester it climbed to 71/72, took a little dip end of my first trimester but still high 60s then in my second trimester climbed to early 70s again. Since having my daughter last week it's nose dived all the way down to 55. Hope this helps x

@Ralala sorry meant to add before I fell pregnant it would go to around 58/60 during ovulation then fall again when AF was ready to appear x

Morning ladies,

I’m just catching up with the posts. @glowingtwig I am hopeful the consultant will give you a call soon just to give you some peace of mind. I hate how so much of this is all having to wait as it just doesn’t help as your mind is constantly on overdrive. Could you try some meditation? (I think I’ve said before that it was never something I bought into but I’ve found it really helpful). The ‘Expectful’ app is very useful for everyone in this journey and has appropriate meditations for whether you’ve suffered a loss or are at a particular stage in pregnancy or those In a sort of limbo.

For me AF has arrived in full force after two days spotting- I tried being hopeful that the spotting was implantation but knew deep down it wasn’t and you just know when it isn’t going to be a bfp deep down don’t you? (Well I knew anyways!) nevertheless it’s still hard and I did hate my body this morning but I figured that’s not helping anything so instead I’m going to work really hard this month on being super health and exercise as much as possible (but not too much that it will prevent ovulation- jeez what a nightmare this whole thing is!!). I’m swithering over whether I opk and bbt track this month- if I’m honest I’m so fed up with that and would LOVE to just go with the swing of things so I might try that.

@glowingtwig oh I get what you mean about a private scan - I had one with my first MC at window to the womb and while there was a heartbeat growth had slowed down so I knew something was wrong and was surrounded by pictures of babies, teddies etc. However, you could have a private scan at a private hospital? Costs double what a scan does at the usual baby-scan places but it is a possibility. I’m not sure whereabouts you live but if you have the funds you could call a local private hospital and ask about fetal viability scans? I only know this because I also did it with this miscarriage - again my dates weren’t matching up and my EPU seemed very dismissive so I called my gynae who referred me for one. It was £162 so pretty pricey (!) but it’s done in a hospital room setting with none of the other faff and you’ll have a proper consultant you could speak to? X

@glowingtwig I forgot to say good luck with your bloods today - fingers and toes crossed for a lovely rise! X

@Sugarskulllover amazing news on your BFP! How exciting!! 🎉🎉
@KJLM sorry to hear AF got you too. I definitely think you do know deep down as much as you don’t want to! I was sure in the run up to mine it was coming 🙄 now CD3 so we will more or less be cycle twins - let’s pray for lots of baby dust for us both xx

@glowingtwig good luck with the HCG today. I have had mixed experiences with EPU as well. With my miscarriage last year they spoke to me as if I was totally crazy when I kept calling and saying my preg test was still positive three months after. I finally said I wanted a blood test and they told me my HCG was still high. Well I could have told them that! Finally someone else scanned and saw something stuck immediately. Wasted two months I could have been trying.

I've also had mixed private experiences. I do think some are great and really professional though so it might be worth trying.

I hope it all works out for you today x

@Sugarskulllover congratulations!!

Sorry @kjlm it really bites doesn't it! Im now in my 4th cycle since my mmc, I really thought I'd be pregnant by now! Focusing on being the best you is honestly all you can do. My focus is on sorting my cycles - less spotting during. I'm feeling like I'm doing everything I can so it's now down to the right egg and sperm. My advice is find something new to try each cycle. It helps mentally thinking "this time could be different because I've...." sending so much baby dust for all of us this cycle!