TTC after MC - Jan/Feb 2021 (Thread 17)

[PumpkinEverything]

A new thread for those trying to conceive after miscarriage.

Have tried to tag as many people as possible!
@Bellabubble
@Pancakes7
@TheDaydreamBelievers
@bez91
@NatJ24
@NatNoo96
@ELMcg
@RichmondLady1981
@susiebluebell
@Garman
@RS2609
@bumptobean
@bubblybrit
@PrettyPinkPansies

Awww @Pancakes7 I'm so sorry you feel this way, it's so hard. I. Have children my youngest is 7 and I. Hadn't planned anymore, got a suprise when I found out I was pregnant.. Sadly lost at 11 weeks since then I feel like every month I'm obsessing over cm, sore boobs and other symptoms. Tracking on ovia etc so I kind of know how you feel its so hard isn't it. Aside from this how are you? Where are you in this cycle? I really hope your feeling better soon and I'm wishing you a huge positive very very soon lots if love xx

Hi @Jaym78 day 29 here. I've had very few symptoms really so convinced af will arrive this weekend. Iv got two cb digitals in the cupboard and its taken a lot of willpower not to use them 😁 but I think if it gets to Sunday and af still not here I will give in. Oh yes got to love amazon for stocking up on ttc essentials 👌 good luck for testing tomorrow, keep us updated!

@Pancakes7 totally understand, i think we all feel like this at various stages. Iv had to unfollow a few people i know who've recently had babies or pregnant as it does hurt and thats not going to do me any good in ttc. Try to focus on you and your journey, do things that make you feel positive (easier said then done i know) and know you are not alone! X

@Loll35, aww my fingers are crossed for you u so hope you get your BFP!! And everyone else too...

I'm afraid to test, but I want too test. I will keep you all updated x

Thanks @Jaym78 and @Loll35 sorry for being such a downer today! I'm currently waiting to get my peak on my fertility monitor. I'm on high result atm so dtd every other day. I think it's just even such my first mmc, I then fell pregnant with my son in only 3 months. At the time that felt like forever but this time it has been 7 months! I just thought oh it'll be about 3 months like last time... 🤞🏻 we all get BFP's that stick soon. I look after my son full time atm as I'm on furlough. I haven't gone back since having my son. I went back for only 2 weeks then been on furlough since. I was going back part time. It means I have a lot of time to over think! 🙈

@Pancakes7 with you there xxx

@ HereWeGoooo
Sorry to hear about your mc! I had a mc in November and barely any CM since. Started to get better this month, (second try) but still not enough. I use a Conceive Plus fertility lubricant (you can get in from Amazon, it is quite expensive and I do apply like there is no tomorrow) and it helps me a lot!
Unfortunately, I think it will take some time for us to get back to the "normal" amount of CM. It does make me worried as it plays a key role in the conception, but with the right lubricant hopefully will be fine!

@HereWeGoooo

Thanks for your reply @Tina8800. I'm sorry you went through a MC too. How are you feeling? I think I took it quite well after initial shock /sadness /disappointment because practically everyone I know with a family has been through MC first. I accepted before pregnancy, that it was quite possible it could happen - still didn't lessen the shock though. I now try to see it as something that is part of the process to eventually having a baby - fingers crossed! Then again, I've only been going through this for 4 or so months, so relatively new to trying. As time goes on, I can see this feeling harder. I was prematurely smug, thinking I must be quite fertile falling pregnant seemingly so easily - I had been a little worried about my age (35 next week.) So now I'm learning not to get too ahead of myself...
I didn't pay attention to my CM before first pregnancy, so I'm not sure if my CM now is my normal or not. Thanks for the tip on fertility lube... might look into that next cycle, if this cycle doesn't work. If I have a daughter in the future, I am teaching her all this stuff about the female body!!!!

@HereWeGoooo I am glad you think positive. My situation is similar to yours. Im 33 and got pregnant on the first try. My mum had a miscarriage too before having my sister, she said sometimes mc is necessary for the body to be able to handle a healthy pregnancy later on. The doctor said I will be more fertile after the mc so I hoped I will get pregnant again straight away. I was extremely scared about not having an ovulation, but I see now my body is slowly going back to normal. Never used ovulation sticks, apps or measured my temperature before, so I felt very overwhelmed. I think I am slowly getting better to figure out how my body works. It is crazy to think how much our body changes over a month and I didnt even know anything about it. How are you dealing with all these things? This month my ovulation test came back positive and had some ovulation cramps so I really hope this will be my month!

@HereWeGoooo grapefruit juice is great for giving you more cm - last year a load of us were drinking it like it was going out of fashion - and it definitely helped! I’m not a fan though - so had to hold my nose whilst I drank lol!

@Tina8800 I was reading too that you're more fertile after MC so I had really high hopes for first try in Dec. I think I put too much pressure on it happening. Now that I think about it, DTD last month was quite dry - I think I put that down to me just going through the motions (that's terrible!) rather than being in the moment and doing it for pleasure! So have tried to relax a bit more this month and certainly had better EWCM. Sometimes I think I'm feeling relaxed outwardly, but head must still doing all the thinking and googling! But it's still early days, so we mustn't get too bogged down with it all.
My periods, since they arrived after MC, seem to be regular, although I've only had 2 cycles. I've had a positive OPK on CD18 both months, so think my ovulation day is definitely CD19. But end up DTD like every day for a week because EWCM comes early, then want to do it over the Ovulation days too. Hard to know when to stop. It's just the waiting game now..

It's good to understand all this stuff, but I wonder if being oblivious and stress-free has higher chances of success! Sod's Law!

@Tina8800 ooh another good tip thanks- will definitely purchase some grapefruit juice next month, if need be!

@Pancakes7 yeh I know what you mean about how it feels like it takes forever, I've tried to block out the timings of my first pregnancy but every now and then ill work out how many weeks I'd be. I don't know why I torture myself like that. Hope you're feeling a bit better today?

@Jaym78 I gave in and tried to test last night but I got an error on the cb digital 🤦🏼‍♀️ I couldn't believe it but took it as a sign. Now back to waiting for af to show up!

Hey @Loll35 I also tested yesterday with a Frer, was a afternoon like n got a negative. Still feeling so nauseous tho and cramping. Thoo that could really be AF, but it's been for about a week. I guess. I'll have too give it a few days and see what happens x

Morning ladies, I'm after some help. After 2 years ttc we have started fertility tests to see if there are any underlying issues. I had an appointment weds which was so emotional ... got shown my ovaries and lots of little follicles which she said were clearly ready for release!!! On weds my CB OPK was flashing and i expected a static on the the thurs/fri which is what the lady said on weds is consistent with what she could see. Anyway ... it's still flashing today. My problem is my OH has to produce a sample first thing tues morning and has to abstain from dtd for Atleast 48 hours before hand. I feel like this is going to be our crucial time and now don't know what to do. Has anyone been in a similar situation? Any thoughts would be super welcome right now as starting to panic XX

P.S ... sorry for waffling 🙈

I haven’t used the clear blue ones, so I don’t knkw what the flashy smiley means - is the static when your lh starts to surge or peak? It might be worth grabbing some cheapy opks and doing a couple across today to see if your LH is starting to rise? If it’s at least 48hrs - does that mean you could drd today and not Sun/Mon and still be ok for Tues? If your ovulation was close, the sperm can hang around for a couple of days so today could still be a good day?

@Ra1nb0w85 I'd agree with what @Bellabubble said and today/early hours of tomorrow morning. It can hang around a while!

@PumpkinEverything how are you? Are you about 12dpo now? When are you testing?

I'm CD29 now, waiting AF. It feels weird because usually I test the day AF is due but because I ov'd pretty early on CD12 and tested at 14dpo I feel a bit in purgatory waiting 🙈 god knows when AF will arrive with my odd cycles.

@bez91 @Bellabubble thanks for replying ladies - really helps to hear another's viewpoint. I have got some cheapy ones that show a rise today so somethings definitely happening, I think we'll dtd like you say tonight and first thing tomo and just hope that covers us 🤞🏼 XX

@bez91 yep 12 DPO today! Keeping myself busy 🙈 husbands birthday yesterday which we booked off. so we had a few outdoor visitors, went on a big walk and then I ordered dinner from our favourite restaurant so the day flew in. Didn’t want to drink in the end as I had a headache alllll day. Will go out for another big walk today, and then Saturday is usually our takeaway night so hoping today goes by as quick. My 3 apps are all different predicting AF - one says tomorrow, one says Monday and another says Tuesday. So just need to figure it all out. Might go for Tuesday or Wednesday if I can survive 🙃

Hope everyone's doing okay!

I was just wondering how everyone else is feeling about future pregnancies? I'm struggling with quite a lot of fear about it (even while I know TTC now is the right choice for my family).

I feel pretty recovered from the miscarriage but I'm worried getting pregnant again (if it happens) is going to put me in a bad place mentally. I wish I could feel more optimistic about it.

@PumpkinEverything can't believe how well you are holding out! Hang in there, so hard not to test sometimes!

I'm now CD8 so been testing using OPKs now but nothing yet. Normally it would be around CD12 or 13 I think based on when I got pregnant before. Weirdly had some pinkish discharge today and a bit of pain but no idea what that's about! The body works in mysterious ways!

Well af showed up for me today as my app predicted. I did only think it would be a small chance of a bfp so not too disappointed this time. On to the next cycle and will start tracking ovulation again this month, have ordered some more cb opks. Going to take it easy for the rest of the weekend as in a bit of pain, hate this first day of af! Hope everyone else is having a nice weekend x

@vitaminb33 hi! I know what you mean. I had a mc at 11 weeks in Dec and I’m feeling non optimistic at the min. I’m afraid that if I do get pregnant again that I will be a nervous wreck waiting for another mc . I’m 41 and had two very easy pregnancies but that was 9 and 7 years ago and I feel like my body just can’t do it again. I’m on day 15 now and had an almost positive opk last night so who knows. I’ve kind of accepted that if it doesn’t happen that is what’s ment to be. X