Will he ever want a baby?

[Genevive123]

I’m in a bit of a crap position at the moment, I’ve been with my boyfriend 5 years now and we’ve had countless arguments about the fact I’m so desperate to be a mum and him not being ready. 6 months ago I said to him, look I need you to know I’m ready and I can’t wait forever

6 months later and I’m still terrified to bring up wanting a baby? Think it’s coming to the end of me being able to wait for him now :( anyone else been in this situation? i adore him but I just can’t wait forever it’s breaking my heart

Aw OP that’s a very hard situation to be in. I’m turning 27 in a few weeks and have also been getting baby fever! Don’t think there’s anything wrong with being a young mum.
Sorry your conversation didn’t go so well last night but it does sound like he agreed to the 6 months timeline to give you a final decision?

It doesn’t sound like he never wants kids. More like he’s not ready? I know it’s easier said than done but I’d hang on for another 6 months and if by then he can’t provide a clear decision/timeline then I’d be out.

If being a young mum is that important to you, more important than having him in your life, then I’d cut my losses now.

This is what I think too!! He’s said in 6 months we’ll start trying (just said this) so if in 6 months he’s still saying no I think that’s my sign to leave, I can’t get strung along, life’s just too short x

Thanks so much lovely I totally agree ! Gosh I need a massive group chat with all you lovely supportive ladies !xxx

@anotherboyontheway love everything you said!! I was a mum of 2 by 24, best thing I ever done!!

@Genevive123 good luck, remember to have little chats with him leading up to the 6 months. See how he's feeling and remember to look in to taking some vitamins before ttc. that can be the first step for him to see this will actually be happening. A good little test in to his commitments to it. Good luck hunni xx

If he knows he doesn’t want one then he should tell me and leave?

Why would he? Presumably baby apart he is happy with you and enjoys your company. He gets to have sex and perhaps you do housework or things he would otherwise have to do himself. He has even managed to get you to the stage where you dread discussing pregnancy which helps considering he comes across as not wanting one (in the foreseeable future at least). What’s in it for him to leave you when he is happy with how things are right now?

I was in this exact position, we had been together for 8 years. I was always very clear that I wanted children, he said he did too. We would have a chat every year or so and he would say he wasn't ready and you can't put a timescale on big decisions.

I had given him 8 years and I moved across the country for him away from family as he couldn't emotionally leave his. In May last year I broke down and told him that I couldn't stay any longer if children were off the cards. I couldn't feel like I was good enough to be his wife but not have children with.

This is where it all changed, he admitted he was comfortable how we were and he didn't want to disturb that. I know that he didn't know how he was making me feel. Happy ending for us is that I am due to give birth in 2 weeks. He is super excited to be a dad. It's not always intentional, it's easy to get comfortable and not want to rock the boat.

@Genevive123 how did you get on with OH? I hope he's warmed to the idea of a baby xx