TTC after MC - November 2020 (Thread 15)

[VP91x]

Hi All,

Please tag anyone from the old thread 🥰🥰

And anyone else who would like to join please do xx

Hi @Hanbanxx! I am in the exact same situation as you. TTC since September, miscarried at 6+2 last Wednesday. Ready to start again, I wouldn't even dream of taking a break as my way of coping is to have some semblance of control in my life. Conception is largely outwith our control but at least the process of TTC has an element of predictability. 🤷🏻‍♀️ I wish you the best of luck and a beautiful rainbow baby in your arms soon! 🌈
Same for everyone else, may 2021 be our year!! 😃

@meganlaura and DTD did the deed (sex) DH Dear husband OH other half

Hey @Hanbanxx

Sorry for your loss - but welcome to the group. Hopefully talking to other people in the same situation can help. I had a miscarriage about 3 weeks ago at 6 weeks - sadly it was our second (had a MMC earlier this year too) but we have decided to crack on again straight away. I feel like at least getting on with trying again is the one thing we can control, which I think some women feel the same about.

I am currently 2DPO, AF is due on the 18th December. Am also using OPKs too to help things along.

Best of luck with this cycle! Hopefully it will work out for all of us soon xx

@eloiseislost I really do get some comfort that there is someone out there in the same situation as me! I'm hoping my cycle will be "normal" this month. My hormone level was very low on Tuesday (two days after MC) at only 15 so I hope that is of some benefit to me. I'm testing with OPKs daily but they are, unsurprisingly, very low at the moment. I also hope that for you too, 2021 will be our year!!! 🌈❤️

@J785948 thank you so much. I am so hopeful that my cycle will be normal this month as my hormone level was extremely low on Tuesday at 15. Does cycle day 1 start from the day of MC?

So, 1 week after surgery and a PT still shows a clear positive. I guess it's a waiting game! Will test again in another week.

Does seem v unfair that itll likely be well over 2 months from finding out to when we can try again

@Hanbanxx - My cycle is only looking a little bit longer, with both of my MCs it was 5 weeks rather than my usual 29 days, but I think to be expected. MY HCG levels were at 300 about 2 days before I started to miscarry this time around.

But yes, CD1 is day 1 of your MC. I think I ovulated on CD19/20 this cycle.

The only bit of advice I would give you, is that after my 1st MC, with the exception of the first cycle, they were a bit longer. I was using the clear blue advanced but on our 2nd cycle despite my "peak fertility" appearing a few days later than normal, I was still a week late for AF (BFN on PT too).

On my third cycle, I was so late ovulating I gave up on my Clearblue Advanced as there were so many days of "high fertility" but no "peak".

On my 4th cycle after my MC (which we got pregnant on) I started using the cheapies alongside my Clearblue. The ability to carry on testing for LH after my "peak" meant that I was able to realise that I was attempting to ovulate, failing to do so and then successfully managing it on attempt #2 a few days later - but the Clearblue wasn't able to pick up on this.

So I would be patient with your cycles after your MC, they can be a bit off but you will ovulate. It meant that out of our 4 cycles after miscarriage, we were only DTD at the right time twice.

I hope that helps! X

@Hanbanxx My levels 2 days after miscarriage plummeted from 260 to 60, so I'm also hoping that I will have a normal cycle this month. Feels so strange to say that I want it to go away quickly, as this was a very wanted baby. 😞
I will start temping and OPKs in a couple of days. DH is happy to try again soon, not sure if he wants it to be this cycle, but I'm sure he can be persuaded if I ovulate.

Thank you @susiebluebell and @MSG92 these abbreviations are hilarious. @thedaydreambelievers my PT was positive for six weeks following my d&c and I got my period at nine weeks. Felt like an absolute lifetime but I know my body is just taking time to heal. I've been eating and drinking what I want and trying to relax but it's always in the back of my mind. Anyone else having irrational thoughts - questioning their own fertility etc which I know is silly at this stage because miscarriage is normal and we really haven't been trying long. I just want a baby so much and keep thinking about what could have been... X

Sorry, completely off topic here but has anyone taken senokot when pregnant? TMI but today is day 4 of not going to the toilet, called midwife team and they said senakot but Google has mixed opinions!

@MSG92 I wouldn't recommend senna try prunes, going for a long walk or milk of magnesia. Senna can really inflame the bowel (I'm a surgical nurse)

@meganlaura thanks, I've drunk prune juice, I have a dog so I walk a fair bit every day anyway, I've had lots of fruit and veg, nothing is working, I don't even feel like I need to go :/

@meganlaura yikes 6 weeks! I was told should be a "not pregnant" within 3 weeks . They said to call again if I have positives after then. Just seems so so long. Feels really cruel that my body has been held up first in a pregnancy that didnt work out then in the time itll take for body to realise it didnt work out.

So it will be 2 weeks tommorow since my surgical managment and i'm think i'm ovulating, i've got ovulation pain and I got a flashing smiley face this morning.
The problem I have is that the month I got pregnant (after 18 months of trying) I never even got peak fertility! So why I am using these bloody tests anyway 🤪.
We dtd on Fri and Sun and will try and dtdt every day this week until we get fed up lol xx

@elsimo - how often have you been testing morning and night with the Clearblue? I have started using cheapies alongside Clearblue Advanced and have actually found the cheapies a LOT better!

@thedaydreambelievers I know I thought it would never end. Especially as my friend also miscarried at the same time and she was pregnant again before I even got my first period post miscarriage! I always say everything happens for a reason. Will be four months since d&c next week and tbh I think I needed that time to emotionally heal. Our due date was 15th march which is my late father in law's birthday who I was very close to.

No I was just testing in the morning but I will test morning and night.
I did wonder about the cheapies but do u just go by how dark the line is? Is it easy to tell the difference in the strength of line?

I'm not convinced i'll catch it this month cuz I won't know what my cycle is doing at all but as others have said, at least if i'm trying I feel like i'm in some kinda control!! Xx

@elsimo if anything that’s better that you don’t know as it reduces stress and obsessing over ovulation (I do anyway lol). Hopefully you will be more relaxed and it will happen. Maybe just DTD every other day/few days between now and next AF to increase chance. Good luck x

@elsimo for cheapie OPKs I'd recommend using them once daily until the line starts to get dark then 2-3 times a day. It's a "positive" if the test and control line are same colour. Dont worry if you miss a 100% positive. I only did them once a day and missed the peak the month I conceived - you can still see the rise of them getting darker until the time I ovulated then lighter afterwards.

@TheDaydreamBelievers and @CLSM
Thanks :)

I will order some from amazon I think.
I do get pretty bad ovulation pain so kinda now when it's happening anyway, I was sore yesterday but not today so it may be past this month and if thats the case we only dtd twice so probs missed it xx

@CLSM @elsimo so I am deffo one of those people who obsess over OPKs, but I am a control freak and it helps me with my anxiety with ttc to know what my body is doing. My husband also doesn't like the pressure of timed sex, so I would rather only do it once/twice just at the right time than every other day for a longer period.

Every time I have caught my "peak" it has been early evening and after my first cycle, where I just tested every morning, I have done it morning and evening. You can miss the surge by just doing the mornings, my surge tends to go a bit longer so I think I would catch it, but if you wait to dtd until that evening, you may well miss the egg.

I find the east at home tests very very easy, combined with the Premom app. As you can see (pic attached) it's really easy to see my "peak" and then my LH levels coming down afterwards.

Now, I use the Clearblue advanced to pick up my estrogen rise, abs then I just rely on the cheapies!

@J785948 oh that looks perfect. I will order some :)
Next cycle will be easier for me once my period comes again! Or maybe I will have a miracle and get pregnant this time 🤞🏻🤞🏻

It's interesting how much the psychological aspect varies @J785948! We preferred every 2nd day as that allowed us to ignore the intense pressure of peak day! The one time we tried to DTD after an OPK peak the... pressure got too much for DH if that makes sense!

Does anyone know when you can start having sex again (just generally) after the surgery? The medics said to me after next period but I note all the written materials say after stopping bleeding?

@J785948 thank you so much for that advice. I've only been using cheap ones that I bought in bulk from eBay. I will use them throughout my cycle. I ovulated on day 16 when I fell pregnant so I'll anticipate that happening later. I'm going to try my hardest not to test until second week into January which would mean I would be late by a week then. Fingers crossed. It's just horrible when it's all you think about, isn't it? There's nothing that can distract me from this x

@eloiseislost I totally understand how you're feeling, this was very wanted for us too. The thing that I've found the hardest is all the excited hopes and dreams I had for this baby (thinking ahead to Christmas next year) seeming impossible at the moment. Hopefully we have got this! I'm using OPKs now which absolutely pointless as they would of course be negative this early on but it just helps me keep an eye on things x

@elsimo I find that cheapies let me know when I'm getting close to ovulation by the strength of the line... that helps me feel more in control although I'm absolutely not!