Any mums in 40's ttc?

[timeforanother1]

Just that really!

I'm aware I'm in the 'older' bracket now but really want to soon start trying for another (have 1 already).

We have been thinking about it for a while now and have this time to see what happens. Theres only positives when we weigh everything up.

Planning on starting to try next month.

Anyone else?

@FeatherInTheBreeze have you managed to hold off testing?

Well I am now in day 2 of the tww and think I'm having symptoms!
Why do our bodies/ minds do this?
I've felt sick, had boob and nipple pain, stomach cramps all in the last 2 days.

Hows everyone else doing?

Hi @timeforanother1 I'm about 11dpo now and am feeling pretty unwell, it's up and down though. Yesterday and the day before I felt absolutely awful and was 95% sure I was pregnant as it is such a distinctive feeling (and I was really ill by the time I missed my period with both DCs too). Today I still feel queasy and dizzy but had a better night's sleep and feel much less unwell so not so sure. On balance I think it's v. likely that I conceived this cycle but obviously lots of conceptions don't implant successfully or fail early on, especially when you're on the older side. Not sure whether to test or not. Maybe better to wait a few more days and see how I feel. Bit of a weird zone -- because I get so ill so quickly when pregnant, I'm feeling this week that I have to prepare for that possibility work-wise, while at the same time knowing it might well come to nothing.

As for symptoms at 2dpo honestly I have felt different from about that point with all my 'conception' cycles (had two early v. early losses before DS1 as well), so personally I think it is possible to sense something before implantation though obviously when you're TTC it's also so easy to imagine/bring on/notice symptoms you otherwise wouldn't by obsessing about them!

@kalidasa I don't think I am this time but I feel lots of bodily changes... could be I'm aware of/ looking for more!

Tempting to test tomorrow isn't it? What tests have you got? If cheap ones maybe hold off to day 13/14 if it's a better one it may show something tomorrow at 12 days!! But if you don't want to risk seeing a negative then wait if you can. I have EVERYTHING crossed for you I hope you get your bfp- please show us!

@timeforanother1 things have gone a bit weird here as my (v. elderly) father was admitted urgently to hospital yesterday with heart issues, so I've had to dash up to be with my (also elderly and currently very frail) Mum. Booked myself in for an 8am rapid Covid test in central London first to be on the safe side and then a long drive in the pouring rain on very little sleep. Trying to catch up quickly now with some of the work I should have been doing today! I do have some internet cheap tests at home but I didn't bring them with me as I just felt I needed to focus on one thing at a time if you know what I mean. The nausea is not too bad maybe about the same as DS1 at this stage, better than with DS2 but I am noticeably dizzy and absolutely no sign of my period at all, not a single spot so far which is unusual for me at this point. So honestly I think I probably am but feel that I need to kind of park that possibility for a few days! Hope that makes sense. How are you feeling?

Can I join this thread? I am 42 and TTC number 4. I have three older kids and was done. Then I accidentally conceived in lockdown 1 and was surprisingly pleased, then I experienced a missed miscarriage.

We have tried for 4 months since the miscarriage. I am 2 dpo now. This is the last month we will try, if I’m not pregnant I will go for a big promotion at work the deadline for which is one day after my period is due! If I get that promotion I will throw myself into that and forget about another baby. If I’m pregnant I will throw myself into that and forget about being a career woman for a while.

So I just want a bit of company for my aged ovaries in our last ever 2ww.

Hello @Feminmister I know just what you mean about work stuff. I knew I wanted another as soon as I had DS2 but DH didn't so I threw myself into a series of projects to try to distract myself, last of which was a big book I finished in the summer. But then I was still left with this longing for another baby and to step back from work / do more creative stuff for a while and it seemed like at 40 I had to confront it. I can also imagine throwing myself into a new project though if it doesn't work out. Fingers crossed for you and sorry about your miscarriage.

@timeforanother1 I held off testing for a bit but then felt like I was experiencing symptoms so tested. Got a negative and AF arrived today like clockwork. Not sure if I will try again next month. It hurts me too much every time.

@Feminmister I also conceived accidently in lockdown and had a miscarriage. We DTD ONE TIME! But now I'm actively trying and it's not happening. So frustrating.

Feel like I need to accept it won't happen and give up trying. That hurts my heart to even write that.

How are you feeling now @timeforanother1 ? I suppose it's still a bit early for you to test.

I started bleeding very heavily and abruptly yesterday, not at all how my period usually starts (I usually have a few days of spotting) and a lot more painful than usual too. Given how unwell I was feeling I suspect it was a false start / tried-to-implant situation, but I didn't actually test as I didn't see what that would add really, the sickness and dizziness started to ease immediately and has already nearly gone. Bit sad of course but also feel philosophical about it -- there were pros and cons to the timing and I'm mostly just still really happy that DH has agreed to try at all. So onwards to this month for me, and enjoying feeling better physically and not having to face Christmas while really ill (as the HG would definitely have fully kicked in by then if I was pregnant).

Hi ladies, ovulation in 5 days. How is everyone doing ? X

Hello everyone
Can I join in please
I was 43 in October and have been actively ttc since then.

Hello @FluorescentAdolesent ! I'm coming up to ovulation now in this cycle, lots of signs of fertility for a few days now but I often have long cycles with quite a long period of being apparently 'about to ovulate' so I reckon it'll be any time between tomorrow (CD13) and Christmas. It was CD20 last cycle, but the fertile signs started a good bit later. Sounds like we're at about the same point @Idreamof2more ?

@kalidasa hi yes that’s exciting I am due to ov Friday according to flo and got a flashing smiley 2 days ago but run out of sticks and refuse to waste money on them anymore so just dtd every other day for a week and then wait and see. I’m relaxed about it and just see what happens x

I’ve used the clear blue advanced tests for the last two months, although the first month only had a flashing smiley so this time was my first with the static which was 8 days ago. My cycles are on average 25 days so I think I must be due to test on Christmas Day

@FluorescentAdolesent ooooooh that’s exciting 😬🙏💓

Sorry everyone I didn't realise anyone was still posting on here for some reason this thread has been at the bottom of my list of threads?!

Welcome new ladies- anyone can join lol!

@kalidasa how are your parents? Sorry for what sounds like a slight loss.
How long are your cycles then? Are they usually all over the place?

@FluorescentAdolesent have you any dc already?

@Idreamof2more good luck dtd as much as you can lol!

@Feminmister did you test?

Well af came for me a whole week early! So using my app for my fertile window means we completely missed with all our attempts except 1. Makes me a bit more hopeful as that first time means we didn't really get a proper chance to try. So we are currently dtd even more as it seems my fertile window needs more time!

Hello

Yes I have four much older dcs

Please bear with me whilst I get my head around posting on here I’m a bit of a technophobe tbh!!

I’ve been using the period tracker app and it doesn’t seem to tally up with ovulation dates yet but I suppose it could take a while to get into synch with my cycle.

I’ve been having some pre menstrual symptoms for the last 24 hours which sort of ties in with my usual cycle so I’m not feeling very positive that we’ve been lucky this month.

I’m going to give myself until
April and then call it a day

How is everyone getting on? Wouldn't it be lovely for some positives on the thread!

I decided to try again this month. Even though my heart still hurts I started feeling a bit more positive after my negative last month.

I'm currently 7 dpo. Going to spend the next week building my resilience just in case.

Yes would be lovely to hear of some positive news
I’m out for this month as AF arrived this morning
Fingers crossed for everyone else and merry Christmas

Oh yes let's have some bfp's on here!

I'm 11 dpo on new years day so I'll be testing then!

When will everyone be testing?
Anyone tomorrow?

Hey I will be testing a week tomorrow at 14 dpo! Come on guys let’s light up this feed with positives xxx

@FluorescentAdolesent sorry this wasn't your month.

@timeforanother1 I think I will test early next week. Don't want to test too soon and get disappointed.

Can I join?!

TTC for 2 ish years. Conceived right away with DS - so this is secondary infertility.

I have been completely checked out and “fine”, but discovered last week that DH has a low sperm count (2million) so that’s why it hasn’t happened for us yet this time. I’ve recently turned 40.

I am still TTC despite the odds being against me! Just can’t shut that door yet.

Good luck to all those testing and here’s hoping for BFPs!

Welcome @Tiletiletile1. Fingers crossed for you! I don't know much about low sperm count. Is there anything you can do to help your chances?

Thank you, FeatherInTheBreeze! His sperm count is unusually low so the doctor is retesting in three months. He doesn’t smoke at all, or drink particularly much, but he isn’t very active (a dog walk a day is it) so becoming less sedentary (he has a very sedentary job!) and supplements seem to be the only changes that apply to him? He is sort of willing. But he doesn’t much want to change. It’s frustrating! And I have to work hard to have no negative thoughts (he’s watched me feel sad every month for two years - and go through every scan and blood test the nhs was willing to do - and only just got himself tested, despite me asking him to intermittently).