Trying to conceive baby No 1 over 40

[October1979]

I am 40 nearly 41 and ttc baby no1. I fell pregnant for the first time in December but suffered a missed miscarriage at 8 1/2 weeks in February. I've been trying ever since with no luck. I use Clearblue advanced fertility monitor. Take vitamin B, C and Co Q10 as well as pre conception tablets daily. Until lockdown I did weekly acupuncture. I guess I'm feeling low as af turned up today and I turn 41 very soon.

I am usually positive and hopeful. Trying to think what's for me won't go past me...

Looking for some buddies in the same boat or some over 40s who conceived naturally to give me hope and share their secret to success.

@Geriatric1234
Thanks for all the advice. I've ordered a Basel thermometer and will start temping as soon as it arrives. It is all seeming a bit clearer now tbh! I'm 41 and had a baby at 39---ironically got pregnant in thr first cycle but I can definitely see a shift and changes in my cycle since then which is making me hope it isn't too late. We already have children so would t go down the ivf route. We would love another baby but have made the decision to be grateful for what we have if we don't manage to conceive again. I'm trying to do everything I can to try to conceive. I would be interested in the fertility tests... I hate not knowing!

@Honey2
Thanks--that's really helpful . It is all making a bit more sense now.

Feeling better @Geriatric1234 just hope it's my turn soon. Phoning my gp back tomorrow who was looking into all the answers to my many questions

@Geriatric1234 I never realised that about CB! Does 2 hormones make it more accurate so you find?

I’ve gone supplement mad this week - realised that the amounts in pregnacare multi vit were too low so ordered vitamin D3, extra folic acid and ubiquinol separately and considering Vit E and C also - but worried I’ll rattle like a bottle and They are not cheap for the max strength ones! Anyone else feel they really make a difference??

@October1979 I see you've used the Clearblue advanced fertility monitor and Ava so I wanted to get your advice on whether it's worth getting both?

I've just brought the Clearblue advanced fertility monitor (haven't had a chance to try it yet) did the Ava just give you reassurance that Clearblue was right? Or do you think it works better?

Hi @Elsbeth1 Clearblue is good for telling me when I'm about to ovulate with the static smiley faces. Where Ava predicts ahead of time when my fertile week will be. ISo when I should start doing the deed. Both are fairly accurate. Ava re calculates and changes based on your readings. It also gives me piece of mind I have ovulated. As it confirms ovulation a couple of days after it has happened based on your parameters. After 4 months I can see I ovulate typically on the second peak day or the day after. I also like Ava for my 2 ww to see that my temps and pulse rate are rising and doing the things they should. The body sometimes gears up to ovulate but doesn't and keeps trying. This means The fertility monitor would give a peak reading. Ava confirms it has and ensures I can hit my most fertile days. I like both together for piece of mind x

So I got a bfp today. It’s very early so I know I need to just stay calm and see what happens but I’m shaking and can’t quite believe it. I was just wondering if anyone has tried taking baby aspirin to help prevent a loss? There’s so much mixed information online. Xx

@Catconfusion OMG YESSSSSSS!!! Congratulations and now BREATHE. Personally I wouldn’t take anything before speaking to a medical professional. So happy for you! Xxx

@Honey2 It is supposed to make it more accurate, but I think without body temping you can never know for sure that you’ve ovulated, but it is consistent with my EWCM so hopefully!

@Catconfusion just a thought - I shared a link to an over 35s thread - if you scroll up they may have more informed advice about aspirin.

Ahh ok thanks for the info @October1979
I'll look at getting it for my next cycle :)

@Geriatric1234 thank you, it’s going be a difficult time ahead but I’m trying to maintain a bit of excitement. It’s so hard after loss.

I wouldn’t take anything without speaking to a doctor either, it’s just they’re not very consistent. When having ds I was told to take it by the GP and the midwife due to age and previous losses. In January I was told not to take it by the Gp who checked with a consultant 🤷🏻‍♀️. I then had a loss. Not saying it was that. There is a recent study that suggests it can help with conception as well as maintaining the pregnancy. I might speak to a different doctor about it.

Thanks for the link, I’ll take a look. Xx

@Catconfusion amazing!!! So delighted for you! Its step one, and you are in with a shot. It’s nerve wracking I know. Things will settle in a few days once it has sunk in a bit. I was very on edge for the first week or two as had cramps, but then felt a bit calmer As things progressed. I kept checking for bleeding every time I wiped, And not so much now. Fingers are crossed for you 🤞🤞🤞

@October1979 hope you are doing ok. Another month, and a fresh start. It will be good to get more info from the go.

Thanks everyone for your advice. I think I was scared to go for the scan as things seem to be progressing nicely and I had finally stopped worrying so much. But I want to get the ball rolling for chromosomal tests so I’m waiting for an appointment now. @October1979 I googled harmony test and it said it’s the same as NIPT?

Good luck everyone with the tracking and opks, and of course hoping this is your month.

@Bouncytree thank you so much. We’re definitely keeping a positive outlook but being realistic about it. In January we got so carried away as the line was getting darker. I did have pretty severe cramps though from before I took the test. I do wonder if my c section scar hadn’t healed up enough. This time I’ve got some tugging but nothing major so taking that as a good sign. It’s so confusing when cramping and even bleeding can be normal but also a sign of something wrong. I do think a scan is the only way to know for sure what is going on.

Yes the harmony and nipt are the same thing. I presume the midwife can refer you. Fingers crossed for us both.

Have a good weekend everyone. Wishing you all the luck in the world! Xx

@Honey2 I take alllll the suppliments (and rattle) and I've found they've been good for regulating my cycle so far

@Catconfusion congratulations! I've seen so many bfp this month it's amazing!! 🤞🏻 for your sticky bean. I wouldn't have thought c-section scars can make that much difference to remaining pregnant, with my teenagers I had my son by c-section at Christmas and got pregnant with my daughter the following July, but who knows if that's different for everyone too!

Thank you so much @Marvellouslymadmum c section recovery seems such an individual thing and I do wonder if being older led to a longer healing time. I guess that’s why they tell you to wait a year. I was getting a lot of pain across my scar when I was last pregnant. This time it feels better but who knows.

Hoping you get some luck soon! Xx

@Catconfusion it's confusing isn't it! I do know that when I was pregnant with my daughter scans were very painful in the scar area but when I was pg 4 years ago and mc the scans I had then hurt just as much! I thought it would be a bit better 11 years on 🤦🏼‍♀️

OMG @Catconfusion great news congratulations!! I'm keeping everything crossed for you. I did aspirin this month and it ended in CP. I would prob phone the GP. However from what I've read it seems harmless once implantation has taken place. So potentially I would do it again after a BFP. I did it before and not sure I should have done that. This is fab so many BFPs on here the last few months. Surely we are collectively beating the age odds already. Stay positive xxx

@October1979 I was just thinking that about the odds! I was really affected by that guy that told you the 1% thing, but I really think it was to flog ivf. This group is proving this isn’t a ridiculous dream!! Yay!!

I know me to @Geriatric1234

I actually suspect I had a chemical in December also. Period was 5 days late and I saw a light second line on my Clearblue fertility monitor pregnancy test even though it came up not pregnant on the screen. I googled it and saw on a chat it said digital tests always have a second line so forgot about it did it again in January and saw no second line. My cycle is religiously 26 days. Ovulating day 15 and 11 day luteal phase. And has been for the last 2 years since I've been tracking. I did it again feb and April the months of my CPs and got faint second lines. But not pregnant on the screen. That made me do FRERs and got my BFPs for 5 days in a row before they faded and disappeared. Since I've realised Clearblue fertility monitor tests are 50mlu compared with frer that I think are under 10mlu. I believe I just didn't have enough hormone in my system as it must have stopped developing. If I'm right that's 3 CPs in 5 months. Not 2 in 4. I think it's prob down to chromosomal abnormalities. Hopefully it's just about the right egg xx

@October1979 thank you so much. I think we’re definitely beating the odds on this thread. This is my 5th pregnancy in two years with one live birth so that must be better than 1-5%

If that’s three chemicals it shows you can conceive which I know is probably not much consolation at the moment but it’s a good sign. A friend of mine had three chemicals in a row then her dd came along. Her doctor said as we get older we can get more receptive to embryos whether viable or not. Sometimes it’s just a case of catching the right one. It seems horrible to keep miscarrying but your body is trying it’s hardest to make it work.

It’s like rolling a dice. When we’re younger it’s like the 2 and 6 are miscarriages. As we get older all the even numbers become miscarriages. We still have every chance of rolling an odd number

I really think you have a good chance naturally! I think we all do! Xx

You rest up and take care @Catconfusion and you too @Bouncytree. Your experiences will keep us positive ❤️

Thanks @October1979 let’s just see how it goes. Still ridiculously early. I’m hopeful this is it but who knows! Xx

Obviously speak to a GP first but this is the aspirin study.

www.webmd.com/baby/news/20210126/post-miscarriage-aspirin-may-affect-next-pregnancy