October 2007 ~All about us ~ MC'ing or MC'ed or TTC of BFP after MC or just loves cakes!

[katendmom]

As we agreed - starting a fresh thread before our original shuts down. Will post this new link into the old thread so everybody can find us!

In the meantime ~ sprinkling it with pink and blue baby pixie dust

and splashing with baby glue so lo's stick around forever ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I spose cos its 8pm here its too late in the day? Got my scan (internal) at 11am tomorrow. Wish I hadn't googled ectopic now - ruptured tubes, loss of ovaries and all sorts, oh dear..

I think I need my large glass of pimms and lemonade again!

Hi there. I've just got back from hospital and thought it might help a bit if I was able to talk to others, as I am feeling very weepy and strange. I found out I was pregnant last week. We have a 2 yr old son and we have been ttc no.2 for about 5 months now. My period was a week late but I was feeling quite run down like I usually do before it arrives so I was quite surprised (and delighted) when a routine health check with my GP showed up that I was pregnant. I took two further home tests over the next few days and we were both delighted when a big fat positive showed up. I went away over the weekend to visit relatives and this morning, just before boarding the plane home, I started bleeding quite heavily. My husband picked me up from the airport and we went straight to the hospital, whjere we've spent the whole day - 3 hours in A&E, 3 hours in the early pregnancy unit - I was internally examined and scanned and we have been told ther eis no sign of a foetus and that I have 'probably' miscarried. I have to go back for a further blood test on Friday to confirm this and to rule out an ectopic pregnancy. I just feel so numb, exhausted and tearful. I told quite a few close relatives about the pregnancy as I was so excited and overjoyed about it, and now I just feel a lurching feeling in my stomach thinking of having to tell everyone what has happened. i am also dreading the rest of the week, as I have my toddler to look after and my husband and mum are going to have to rearrange their workloads to look after him/me. I feel so guilty and pathetic, but also feel very weak and upset and in need of tlc. I hope there's someone out there who knows what I mean...

LoveAngel honey, by no means do I want to minimize your experience because all of experiences are unique and different but I think it is a fair statement to say that all of us on this thread have been there at one point in time (a post from Lily just below yours is an example of it...)

I do not want to ask anything to make you hurt more... but it seems like you have accepted the fact that doctors were correct about their conclusion... in other words you don't have doubts that your dates might be wrong, etc and that's why the exam didn't show a fetus?

It is hard but you just need to concentrate on you right now (and your little 2 yr old if it helps to lift your spirit up a bit). Do let your DH and mom take care of you. Rearranging their schedules is the least they can do now... I would bet it might even help them to cope as it is making them part of your experience... I bet that they're devastated that there is nothing more that they can do for you now... In fact? if everything proves to be the way you suspect ? why don?t you let them share it with relatives as to avoid you having to go through additional pain? I am sure they?d feel even special that you trust them to handle such a delicate and personal task of yours? just a thought?

Please feel free to post here, write down your thoughts, fears... I think getting things down and organizing thoughts helps so many of us to deal with situations that are truly incomprehensible at times.

Lily please do not Google any further? I beg you. I am terrible at that and can Google myself into hysteria (and have been doing that on several occasions, not even pg related) and have come to realize that ?over-information? is like too much booze. At first it makes you feel better, more empowered but then you?re getting and overload and ?data-hangover.? I am sure that if they suspected serious issues that would be putting you at risk ? they would scan you today (8 pm or later ? medical care is 24/ 7). If they felt comfortable with waiting until tomorrow ? they must have their reasons. Also, it must be close to impossible right now, but try to not lose hope?

Lily - oh honey - I'm passing the Pimms - and the carlsberg can... sounds like you need them. Have everything crossed for your scan tomorrow. How far would you be now? I have no experience of ectopic but would think you would be in major pain by now... anyone else know??

Kate - Yes DD is VERY lucky to have a puppy... and a Mum & Dad that adore her.. I know she could be a lot worse off but still would have loved to give her a sibling. Great news DS is responding to the OT He will be nattering away in no time & you will be telling him to "button it"
(by the way - was talking to someone on here and they asked for my home address & I had to say NO. Think they thought I was being over cautious as they were sending my DD a picture... but by Gum... who knows who we are?)

ILTS - "Get a job". You have a bloody job! Doesn't he know that we have the most important job in world?? On 2nd thoughts do any men realise this fact?? Not mine!!

I am on facebook under real name - had no idea MN had something on there! How do I find it?

OOh Kate I like you, you put things in just the right way! You are right they would call me in, and it was only monday that the dr was putting her hands in places that I didn't wish them to be to check for ectopic. Must just be a very slow mc.

loveangel I understand where you are at the moment. Its absolutley devasting to have this happen to you. You always have it in the back of your mind that things can go wrong but don't actualy really beleive they will - esp when you have had successful pg before. I was so shocked when it happened to me, I just hope your other half is more supportive than mine. When I started crying on Sunday when he snapped at me about something - he shouted "Oh don't start that again" - he has no idea. You do whats right for you, no point trying to hide your upset - it will only rear its head later on. Thinking of you x

Mind you now that things are looking a wee bit dodgy re ectopic I think DH is begining to change is bedside manner...

Loveangel - am so sorry - didn't refresh my page before writing my post! Am sorry you have to be here - but you are in the right place for some TLC. Everything that Kate said before me is true - she always speaks sense!

Can I join you lovely, positive ladies !

Was on May 2008 thread but started bleeding at weekend and worse on Monday night, so have been lurking on this thread too. It has really lifted me reading your positive thoughts and support.
Went for scan today and they confirmed that baby still in womb but no heartbeat.

Going back on Friday for 'extraction' (can't they think of a softer term !!) Just didn't expect there would be more - bit niave perhaps.

All seemed to happen in a blur so asked virtually no questions.

We hadn't told many of the pg and this is the worst way to share the news.

Feel numb at moment - one minute OK, next minute in tears, next feeling in a rage.

DP went out and bought loads of lovely, unhealthy food - including LOTS of cakes. Bless him.

FACEBOOK ( I love it!) If you log in and click on groups (on the lefthand side) you can then search mumsnet and join the group. I had a look and it looks like people are under their real names. Not sure how you link them to their mn nicknames though?

hi lily, no i wasnt on the june group i was due in march and have been here for 6 weeks now, im the bringer of battered sausages and katendmoms cyber twin

Lily - I found it! I can't work out who is who either... and considering my MN name is nothing like my RL name then I can see why!

lol rosy tell me about it!! men will never understand the extent of a womans work!!

facebook- join mumsnet groups and theres a discution that says "mn nicknames" just have a look through there, im there

OMG ILTS - I want to find you but it says Mumsnet is a closed group with 532 members?? How do I join?

if you want to find me just search jackie ashton in the left hand side lol i dont mind giving my name out, youll find it anyway when you add me im the one with the picture of a freaky dog, youll know when you see it

oh and just have look around the page with mumsnet group on it and theres a thing somewhere to request to join group or something i cant remember

OK i have only been a member for a few days so its all new!

Teehee - sorry hun - we are ignoring you but welcme to the thread & sorry you have to be here! As you can see we are a chatty bunch (don't i sound posh?) - and your cakes are very welcome!! I had blueberry muffins from Aldi's tonight which is not so posh!

Rosybelle - D'you know what, it is lovely to be distracted by chat about something else apart from the horribleness of today, so don't worry.

Details re Me: first baby and was 10 weeks yesterday.
Details re cakes: Mr Kipling lemon slices, Cream Scones AND Coffee Cake. (DP has been an angel so far - but how long will his patience last)

nowt wrong with aldis, aldi, although they aren't as cheap as they used to be

to search a name you type it in to the little white box woth a magnifying glass on the left hand side, thought id tell you as i didnt know

teehee - I'm glad we distracted you from your day. My 1st mc was at 10+5 so i know how you feel... as many do on here. You are getting soooo close to that elusive 12 wk mark... but just not close enough. Stay strong & positive and you'll get through it... it gets better slowly by the day - promise!
ILTS - my photo is on facebook

iliketosleep sorry, I recognised your name and thought it was from the june thread - but it may have been from this one, I don't know - can I claim pg brain as officially my hcg levels are 8,000. Enough to make me feel sick, so I think I can also claim enough to fuddle my brain.

It seems so odd to be having pg symptoms yet I won't be having a baby, now you have all given me the idea for eaing cakes...lilypink trots off to the kitchen...

teehee sorry to see you have had to join this thread - here have a slice of lemon cake x

katend - you are so lovely and reassuring, you should be a life coach or something. really genuine and positive . .thanks.

sorry that you are here teehee and loveangel - hopefully not for too long but its a great place for tea, cakes and sympathy.

talking of cakes, i had a good 'un at work today - a kind of mocha meringue-ish layer cake with chocolatey cream and chocolate chips.

ladylush - i had the lucky job of being the weekly restaurant reviewer for the local paper here but i am far from a food snob. oh no, i can get my grub on with gourmet or american-junk - no probs. chilli-cheese fries, coke floats, banana-nut pancakes, tuna melts - its all yum.
i went to guyana once when i was younger (partially grew up in Barbados) - all i remember is the bread made out of cassava and a spicy soup called pepperpot.

i added you sausage but haven't dared join the group yet. its so weird having all your business out there . . .

Well, gals, since tonight seems to be about distracting our girl-friends who're sad - here I go (TJ thank you for sweet comments - watch this now)

Just got a call from DH (on my mobile, at the time when he should be picking DS up from nursery - so like any mom, just peed myself thinking - that's it! Something is wrong with our boy).

God bless DH - the first words out of his mouth - "Hun, this isn't about D." Ok, so as I start breathing again (oh and by the way for those of you girls who're TTC #1 - getting to 12 wks ~ it's just a sweet beginning. You will never relax again )

Ok, back to my story - so here it is in a nutshell. My DH saw a post for a lost dog... do you see where it's headed? Yep, on their way from daycare he actually SAW the dog that he believes is on the picture of a missing dog. He picked the dog up and called the number - the person who answered the call pretty much said that it wasn't his dog... like supposedly he saw that dog wondering around... and it does look like his dog but it wasn't his. My DH said it was hard to understand him because the guy had a very heavy accent. So... can you guess the next thing?

"Hun... what should I do?" NOW here is where my craziness comes out - we have 2 dogs... Dobermans... older... 7 yrs and 9 yrs... One hates dogs...

So here is me "Babe, we can't leave this pup in the night. Bring it home, we'll feed it, it'll spend the night... we'll take a picture of it and post it on the same poll. Hopefully the owner will show up..."

So my DH is on the way home now, with our kid and this unknown dog... I'm not sure how I'll break the news to our dogs... Now this puppy absolutely cannot stay with us forever... But I couldn't let it spend the night outside?! It could get hit by a car or something... Am I mad?

stay tuned updates coming

evening everyone

teeheelaydee - sorry about your loss and having to join us I lost my baby at 10 weeks (baby never got past 6) the pain does ease but you never forget, loads of friendship and support on here though

lilypink - sorry to hear what you are going through as well

morning all,

woke up this morning feeling sick and dizzy

am 10 dpo today i think and im loving these new smileys

Sorry to barge in, have been lurking on the thread.

I had 2 mcs over 6 years and then luckily had my son who is now 4, I had a mc in july and have just got a BFP!!! I thought I had AF last week as was bleeding although lightly (sorry if tmi)and this carried on - still spotting slightly. I have been feeling sick and sore and tiered so when I got home yesterday i thought, sod it, will do a test just to confirm I am not pg and Bu**er me, it was positive, don't know whether to laugh or cry, was 5 weeks yesterday, have phoned the early PG unit/miscarriage clinic and they are going to ring back with a scan date - hopefully for next week!!!! Haven't told anyone apart from DH and just wanted to see if anyone had had this happen to them. I know by now to only take each day at a time, but can't concentrate, Sorry for rambling, just have to "talk" to someone and I know you guys are great for support and info.

XX

PS thanks for listening!!

Smiles

Thank you so much for your support and kind words. It was lovely logging in this morning and seeing them. Thank you, thank you

I am very pleased for my BF and I have yet to see any pics of the little man so no doubt I?ll cry some more. But my BF is a very matter of fact and at times formidable woman who I will volunteer to shut up about the baby/baby things if I?m feeling down. She knows she is very lucky. As for work I really hope it picks up. ?Cause I have lost all motivation to do anything other than think about TTC I don?t seem to be initiating any new projects and I am very bored! The conference in Glasgow was dull but a year to the hour of my mc I spent it discussing Persia and Alexander the Great with an Iranian academic. How surreal is that?

Problem is that I have a very good head for dates and cling to them like life rafts. When I next get pg I?m going to ask not to know my EDD for the first few weeks and have some self control in not finding out myself if possible. You can start taking bets on that one now .

Wheelybug, yes the place where I work will look good on my CV but I need experience to go with it especially in the field I?m in and I am just plodding along at the moment. I met an old colleague at the conference and it made me realize how much I had achieved which in Newcastle and yet I have very few opportunities to do that in my present post.

Alas no shopping spree in the lovely Glasgow, didn?t even make it to the Kelvingrove which I was keen to visit. But it didn?t rain (yippee) and I got to see it in a lot of wonderful autumn sun.

ILTS keep up resisting to test, now long to go now

Katemom, loved the story about the pup (I?ll have him!!) What happened next?

Torres I?m so pleased to hear your scan went so well. You must be so excited!! We are having another cake fest, fancy coming along? It was very lucky for you last time

Kensgirl posted a little while ago (3rd Oct) in the TTC #1 thread and said she had been having technical hitches but we haven?t heard from her since.

Smiles, I have no expereince but just wanted to say good luck!

Hello to everyone else, especially the newbies - sorry you have had to join us.