TTC 35+ Thread 4 Cougar and Silver Fox Club

[Sleeeeeepy]

Yes it's Thread FOUR! Baby dust all round!

[quote mouldygrapes]@Keepeas not sure re implantation. Also it sucks seeing pregnant people everywhere, sorry.

If I’m not pregnant this month (or even if I am) then I’ve really got to lose some weight. I feel so lumpy and awful, and it’s not healthy[/quote]
think you're right @mouldygrapes, best to have a plan for how to improve things, I'm going to focus on exercise and nutrition this month, at least then I'll feel healthier even if I'm not pregnant!

@SnowWhite1985 I think lockdown has not been kind to many of us regarding weight! I usually put on weight in by bum and hips, but it’s all over this time and everything looks so jiggly 🙈. My partner is in the same boat, he is doing more exercise but is terrible with nutrition. I think he’ll try harder if I make more of an effort with food, he’s very excited about TTC (and not just for the DTD bit!).

I’m still getting the hang of my cycles post Mirena removal. Removed 19th May, spotted for about 10 days (think just related to the removal) light period 25th June and a proper one 21st July. So I’m estimating 26 days, but let’s see this month! The last time I had natural periods was probably 20 years ago

@SnowWhite1985 @Keepeas great plan! Focusing on health can’t be a bad thing and if it distracts us from TTC stressing then even better!

Hello everyone - good to meet some fellow 'mature' ladies :) I've had a rocky few months and am trying to calm down a bit! I'm 38 and TTC #2 (first child was conceived immediately when I was 35).

Been trying since the start of the year, but I think the weirdness of lockdown messed up my cycles (it was full-on trying to do childcare and work at the same time). Also, I've only recently got the hang of all the cycle lingo and how everything seems to work. Tests indicate that I'm ovulating, which is good.

I posted about my weird BBT chart in a separate thread, but no replies yet - does anyone know about these things?!

Here it is:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/3993364-does-this-bbt-chart-make-sense-ttc

Welcome @CC81! I don’t know much about temping as I’ve only done it for 2 months now. Someone suggested I use fertility friend rather than femometer and I do find it easier to read / interpret. The algorithms are apparently different so you might want to input your temp data into that app. That’s what I did - but now both apps are showing different ovulation dates (one at CD10 and one at CD14). From my extremely limited knowledge I would have thought the same as you - that ovulation would have been earlier in the dip that you have before the rise. Sorry that’s not very helpful - still learning myself too!

Thanks @SnowWhite1985 :)

Yeah, a few people have recommended Fertility Friend... I may enter all my last month's data into that, to see what it says.

I've found the Clue app handy for monitoring other things, but not temping (I've used Femometer for the latter).

But to be honest, I think my results are all weird anyway... I go through phases of disturbed sleep, so conditions aren't quite right for testing. My temp often seems higher first-thing in the morning (compared with later in the day), which isn't very 'basal'!

Oh, and just to complicate matters, I have some random brown spotting (light) today, about 10-12 days after ovulation.

I've sometimes had the same in previous months and wondered if it was implantation bleeding - but then my period has appeared shortly afterwards, so I'm not optimistic!

I know that mid-cycle spotting can be a sign of low progesterone, but I know it's not that, because my progesterone test a few days ago showed a decent level.

I hate all the uncertainty!!! :/

Think I'm in a MH funk, work is shit as well, think I'm just overdone and need a break roll on end of the month. Still keep crying but not just about ttc now.

Welcome @CC81 - sorry I can't help with the query, but maybe someone else can! This is a fab group! 😘

Boo to the BFNs! 😔😔😔 Sadly that's AF here for me, so onwards to cycle 4! Trying not to obsess, get worried etc! Not gonna lie though, it's hard!

🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻 to the golden ovaries in the TWW!!! 😘😘😘

Thanks @M4v3r1ck - I agree, it's hard not to obsess!

I was determined to be easygoing about the process, but it hasn't worked out that way.

February = I didn't monitor anything, so don't know if timings were right. March = We had a month off trying. April/May = Normal(ish) cycles and started a bit of monitoring. June/July = Irregular cycle and got REALLY STRESSED, but finally got the hang of monitoring stuff. August = Started tests and things seem okay so far.

When I look at it like that, it's not that bad really. But I got super-anxious in June/July... perhaps partly why my cycle went a bit weird.

@claireb707 so sorry. I think you said you had some time off at the end of the month, hang on in there. Altho if you’re really struggling, consider taking some sick days.

@CC81 welcome! This group is great. I can’t help with the temping I’m afraid, but I think stress and anxiety about TTC really doesn’t help. I’m aware I’ve done that to myself this month. So hard to relax when you start tracking. I feel like I may have interfered with ov this month from stress. Hardly any EWCM when I usually have tons, and lacklustre LH tests.

Love to everyone, especially those having a hard time / negative tests

I spoke to my GP this morning and she is referring me to the infertility clinic! I was worried I wouldn't qualify as I have got pregnant 2x in the year we've been trying, just haven't been able!e to hold onto them. She rang the clinic to discuss though and they've said they will accept the referral. So that's way more than I expected from the appointment- I was hoping she would agree to thyroid and vitamin D blood tests!

So now I booked in for CD21 bloods, then have to rebook for between CD2-5 of next cycle. My partner has to arrange a sperm analysis too. Then when we have the results of those she will refer me on.

Definitely feeling more positive. Either something will come up that we can address or we can carry on without worrying there's something big that's totally preventing us getting pregnant again

Hi @Semele5069, we’re having the same tests atm - had my 21 day progesterone a few days ago and have my day2-5 test arranged for next week. Agree that it’ll feel better to know if there’s any issues. And get referred so we can at least know what’s up.
Sorry for the disappointments @Keepeas @M4v3r1ck. It’s the worst. I’m just waiting for my AF to arrive in the next day or two as well. Not entertaining any hope for this month - it’s the most negative I’ve felt about a cycle for some reason and I believe there’s zero chance this month whereas other months I’ve always had hope and done lots of pregnancy tests.

Sorry for all the bins

I’m in fw now and it’s roasting and oh is exhausted from work. No idea how I’m ever gonna make this work 🙈🙈

@SnowWhite1985 - I'm similar - I just assumed it won't happen this month!

I'm now pretty sure my "random spotting" today is actually AF appearing. I have mild cramps too. The bright side is that it would mean my cycle is back to normal (circa 28 days) - whereas the previous one was irregular (36 days), which freaked me out. I think it was due to stress.

We're trying to decide whether to get a private 'Fertility MOT' and if so, WHEN. It costs about £400 for the pair of us and includes scans etc.

But I wonder if I'm being too hasty. In this cycle, I had an LH surge (strong positive OPKs for two days) and a good progesterone result after ovulation (GP test at the weekend), etc.

BUT I'm 38 and we've been trying for over 6 months, so I don't want to waste time!

It can be tricky to book NHS appointments - I'm already feeling stressed about trying to get a 'day 3' blood test booked at the right time; and also get my husband to arrange his test. Whereas a private suite of tests would just get everything dealt with efficiently and with the extra reassurance of scans, etc. Hmmm.

@cc81 my GP has also referred me for tests but it’s quite a faff and booking isn’t easy so am very tempted for us to pay for them privately and get done ASAP....then at least we know what we’re dealing with. Am 41 and a bit and time is. Or my friend

@CC81 that’s good your cycles are back to normal. Mine were errant for several months after I came off the pill after a very long time. But now they’re regular as clockwork - have been 26-28 days every month since Jan 2018 (I was planning for this before my partner was ready lol)
I’m also wondering whether to do a fertility mot. My main reason is that AMH tests aren’t covered on the nhs so it would have the benefit of this as well. I did a postal AMH test during lockdown and it came out quite a bit worse than average for my age. But it was quite cheap and I’m not convinced of its accuracy so it would be nice to get a second opinion on that! We’ve been lucky with our GP practice so far - they gave me a 21 day progesterone test the day after I had my fertility appt. but my old surgery was a nightmare to book appts so totally understand your frustration. I’ve had strong positive on LH every month for almost a year. But this cycle was weird in that I had a weak positive then a second surge. In some respects it was a blessing as it promoted me to make the medical appts and my partner (reluctantly) agreed to get the sperm tests too.
I also had private hormone tests quite a few years ago (when I was worried about turning 30 and fertility and had a job that covered some of the costs!) all my hormones were normal then apart from progesterone but my doctor was convinced that was stress. Will be interesting to see how things are different now that I’m 5 years older and in a less stressful job. At that time I got an ultrasound too which showed everything was normal. I didn’t get AMH or follicular count for some reason though. I tend to err on the side of more information is helpful, but I’m sure others might disagree!

I got my progesterone checked last cycle just to make sure everything was fine. My doctor is pretty good and was happy to arrange it when I asked. My main reason was that I was getting lots of spotting and I just thought there was no point trying for 6 months if there was something simple going on. This is cycle 4 so I guess if I get nowhere in next 3 months, I’ll try and get referred. Hoping it doesn’t come to that. My oh is very much of the opinion it will happen when it happens and isn’t stressed about it in the slightest. Think I need to try and get some of that from him!!

Morning everyone 😊 I woke early today so have been out for a (very slow!) jog and feeling much more optimistic.

Not sure if anyone is testing today but 🤞🤞🤞 if you are.

Hi 👋 @CC81 sounds like we're in a similar position. I've been ttc #2 since Christmas too.
I've temped for about 18 months between ttc now and for my LO. I wake up any time between 5 and 8 (and since lockdown haven't set an alarm 🙌) so I know that must affect my results, but even so i can have a positive OPK and not see my temp peak for another 5 days. We now keep dtd till after my temp has risen just in case something funky is going on.
I read 'taking control of your fertility' which was helpful to understand more about bbt.

I also get spotting for days before my period, and can have anywhere from 10-15 days between LH peak and period starting. Annoyingly I had progesterone test, and it was low (26 nmol/L) but because my period came early the dr said this was fine, but i would have thought that my period coming early sometimes suggests that maybe I dont have high enough progesterone levels 🤷‍♀️
We've agreed that if we get to a year of trying with no success then we will go to a private fertility clinic and get some tests done. Until then we'll see what the NHS will allow us, unfortunately I don't think there's much they'll cover as we've already got one.

Playing catchup after an interesting few Days. Sorry for the BFNs. And kudos to those looking to be more healthy! Lockdown has been so tough!

@FridaKFangirl “lady jar” in the bathroom made me smile! Worried my new “lady jar” looks too similar to the toothbrush cup! Maybe razor blade holder would be the way forward.

Welcome @CC81 we are also trying for #2 and this is cycle 3.

So first month of ovulation tests underway And husband on board for lots of trying this week, i had a “surprise” rescheduled copolscopy yesterday which should have happened in March. I am thankful for the cervical screening programme, but however much I try and rationalise it, these appointments fill me with dread. Anyone else feel the same? Anyway. They were lovely and it’s all over with now and no need to stop trying or anything overly sinister going on. Had a wee biopsy so no TTC for a few days but no LH surge yet either so might still be ok for this month... sigh. Best laid plans...

Hi all
Please could join this thread.

I'm 36 and trying for baby number 2. I have a son who is 4.

I'mcurrently on CD12 buy i think I may have missed the correct day to start testing with CB advanced digital ovulation test. For the past 3 days I have had a low results but I have a ton of egg-white CM. I have been dtd as if I were in my fertile window but confused as to whether I missed the correct day to start testing so getting an incorrect reading on CB. I didnt test on CD 8-9. My cycle is normally 28 days.

#confused!

Hello @CurlyNo2 welcome!
Yeah they need to build up a memory over a few days so may well show a circle even if a true reading would be flashing. I've made this mistake. I'm pretty sure I've got smileys when I'm super dehydrated too.
So I've stopped using them, now that Ive gauged my average ovulation day, otherwise I feel like I'm chucking money away!
If you can spot your ewcm you're half way there anyway!
Good luck in your TTC journey 🙂

@SnowWhite1985 - It's good that you're taking steps to move forward. I'm the same - it was horrible getting so stressed out by a weird cycle, but it made me get some appointments and tests booked, after dithering for a while.

I think we'll 'twin track' NHS and private and see how we get on with each. To be fair to the NHS, I had my 'day 3' test at short notice today (actually 'day 2', but I think anytime between days 2 and 4 is okay).

But I also want to know about AMH, what shows up on scans, etc. It'll either rule out more potential problems (which will reassure me), OR identify a problem (which we can then tackle).

@Keepeas - Yes, sounds very similar! Do you mind me asking your age? I've panicked a bit because I'll be 39 in autumn. Ideally I'd like to have a second child before 40 and not have too big a gap between them (my daughter will be 3 in autumn). But I'm worried in case it simply isn't possible at all, let alone having preferences :/

@Highlandmama - Thank you. Glad your procedure went okay and is now over! But the timing issue is so stressful :/

Hi @CurlyNo2 and welcome. Yes I have come across getting low then going from low to peak. I think it has to start from a base level to measure your estrogen in order to detect the rise hense why you should start testing on a certain day. Any way sounds like you are doing the right thing by dtd and you'll probably get your peak in a day or 2 if your on a 28 cycle. I would also test in the afternoon now around 2pm if your not already doing that. Good luck!

Timing-wise, we currently sort-of follow the SMEP schedule.

Post-AF, we aim to do it every other day. If I get a positive OPK, we do it three nights in a row, then back to every other day. Then stop when AF appears again.

Random stuff I've learned:

• For a few months I had very little EWCM, then realised it coincided with taking antihistamines for hayfever! Not sure if that's medically correct, but I no longer take them in my suspected fertile window.

• In my weirdly long cycle, I had an initial LH surge, which I recorded - but it coincided with a really stressful couple of days, which I think delayed ovulation and thus my period. It really worried me. But I think I'd actually had a second surge and ovulated about 10 days later, as I had random EWCM at that time! Hence my period being 10 days late.