TTC 35+ Thread 3 Cougar And Silver Fox Club

[ELM7]

New thread for us all and the list....
Lynnsong, 45, TTC (trying to conceive)#1, cycle 2
Dipsy77, 43, TTC (trying to conceive)#4, cycle 3 after MMC (missed miscarriage)
Sunbird24, 42, TTC (trying to conceive)#1, ivfsolo, attempt#1
Wavesandsmilesagain, 41, TTC (trying to conceive)#5,
Anna41, 41, TTC (trying to conceive)#2, cycle 5
Claireb707, 41, TTC (trying to conceive)#1, cycle 11
Tiletiletile1, 40, TTC (trying to conceive)#3, cycle 18?
Lucieloos, 40, TTC (trying to conceive)#3, cycle 3
Lastditchattempt20, 40, TTC (trying to conceive)#2, cycle 2
Posy1, 40, TTC (trying to conceive)#2, cycle 7
Justonemore39, 39, TTC (trying to conceive)#2, cycle 1
Musiceverywhere, 39, TTC (trying to conceive)#2, cycle 2
Selina37, 39, TTC (trying to conceive)#3, cycle 19
FridayKfangirl, 38, TTC (trying to conceive)#1, cycle 1
LT103, 38, TTC (trying to conceive) #1, cycle 3
Loladoodle, 38, TTC (trying to conceive)#3, cycle 2
Bearhug9, 37, TTC (trying to conceive)#1, cycle 8
Happyhappy37, 37, TTC (trying to conceive)#3, cycle 2
Sleeeeeepy, 37, TTC (trying to conceive)#3, cycle 1
Elm7, 37, TTC (trying to conceive)#1, cycle 8 (after MMC (missed miscarriage))
ChicaXS, 37, TTC (trying to conceive)#1, cycle 3 (after tfmr)
Moominmiss, 37, TTC (trying to conceive)#4, cycle 10
Farfromperfect82, 37, TTC (trying to conceive)#1, cycle 5
Angelchops30, 37, TTC (trying to conceive)#2, cycle 3
M4v3r1ck, 36, TTC (trying to conceive)#1, cycle 2
Matilda19, 36, TTC (trying to conceive)#4, cycle 2
Muda, 36, TTC (trying to conceive)#1, cycle 7
Semele5609, 36, TTC (trying to conceive)#1, cycle 2 after MMC (missed miscarriage)
Bellabubble, 36, TTC (trying to conceive)#1, cycle 4 after MMC (missed miscarriage)
Eviesma, 35, TTC (trying to conceive)#3, cycle 1
Chlo2701, 35, TTC (trying to conceive)#3, cycle 3
Pirateweasel, 35, TTC (trying to conceive)#2, cycle 3
Emeraldlily18, 35, TTC (trying to conceive) #1, cycle 13
Kwastell, 35, TTC (trying to conceive)#1, 2+ years (3mmc)

BFP (big fat positive)’s....
Mrstobe, 36, TTC (trying to conceive)#3, cycle 6 (1 MMC (missed miscarriage)), BFP (big fat positive)!
PinkTulipz, 37, TTC (trying to conceive)#3, cycle 1, BFP (big fat positive)
Sunshine1984, 36, TTC (trying to conceive)#2, BFP (big fat positive)

I've been cramping this afternoon and don't know if it's a period coming, possible implantation a week after ovulating or nothing at all, just psychological 😂 i don't think I'm gonna like this game! x

@Muda @Happyhappy37 thank you ladies. Yes he knows and he now is seeing a GP. What upsets me the most is that this has been a long-standing issue since trying to ovulate and I tippytoe around him regarding this due to his sensitivity and he hasn’t done done anything about it. He makes it ascertain that it won’t be an issue (which is why he mutually agreed to ovulation induction) but it’s clearly psychological! It’s just a wasted month and men seriously do t understand what women do for TTC, we drag our bodies through the mud and they have such a blase approach towards TTC. It’s not easy mentally or physically particularly the burden at our age. I’m going to take a break and stay with my sister for a while- too stressed and upset to be around him. Was much calmer today and he spun it around making it seem like it’s my fault as I’m not supportive enough when it happens.

[quote ChicaXS]**@Muda* @Happyhappy37* thank you ladies. Yes he knows and he now is seeing a GP. What upsets me the most is that this has been a long-standing issue since trying to ovulate and I tippytoe around him regarding this due to his sensitivity and he hasn’t done done anything about it. He makes it ascertain that it won’t be an issue (which is why he mutually agreed to ovulation induction) but it’s clearly psychological! It’s just a wasted month and men seriously do t understand what women do for TTC, we drag our bodies through the mud and they have such a blase approach towards TTC. It’s not easy mentally or physically particularly the burden at our age. I’m going to take a break and stay with my sister for a while- too stressed and upset to be around him. Was much calmer today and he spun it around making it seem like it’s my fault as I’m not supportive enough when it happens.[/quote]
I hear you @ChicaXS
Every month partner seems really keen for trying and then when it comes to the actual days we need to try he's playing his xbox till right before bed and then he's too tired and then gets in a huff when I try and get him to put some effort in.

Plus we also have ED issues too 😢

Weirdly people keep telling me they’ve dreamt I’m pregnant! I haven’t told anyone we are trying!

@ChicaXS that is really frustrating. I get where you’re coming from. My partner doesn’t like “feeling pressured to perform on demand” and has had a bit of psychological ED in the past. It’s been OK so far but early days for us and I may need to sit him down and explain that the window for viable egg is not that big, so he needs to understand that when I say “go” it’s not to pressure him but it’s a time sensitive situation!

I don’t know what else to suggest for your partner other than its good that he’s seeing GP. I work in sexual health and the male psyche is fragile and when confidence takes a knock due to ED it can really take a while to regain that confidence (and any subsequent failures just compound the issue).
Viagra isn’t a magic bullet and with psychological ED doesn’t always help (for some it’s a placebo thing but not always). Good luck xx

It's definitely psychological here. He seems fine when he's had a drink (sadly can't get him drunk every night around ovulation).

It was even worse when we first met and we're using condoms, it was almost like condom came out of packet and a switch was flipped... 😢😢

Came down from work for the OH to tell me the MIL is coming to visit....of course it had to be the days I’m likely to be ovulating. He’s like it’s fine, we can still DTD but I’m not sure how I feel about that, the walls aren’t that thick....he offered to put her off but there’s no good reason to and I don’t really want him telling her. Might just save the clearblue tests until next month 🙄

@ChicaXS I think a lot of is definitely psychological or stress. My oh usually has no issues but couple of mo the ago he had exams and studying lasting 2 months and it happened lots then. I’ve purposefully now chosen not to tell him when I’m ovulating (or even that I’m using opk) as I don’t want him worrying about it. I’ve just said that there are only a few days of the month where I can actually get pregnant and that we need to be dvd more frequently. He’s happy enough with that and I’m hoping he doesn’t decide to look into it 🤣
I’ve decided this month to be more relaxed. I will still do opk but I’m banking myself from googling symptoms or testing too early. It’s so easy for it to take over your life and I don’t want to be wishing away every month. I don’t know what to do for the best

Hey ladies,
Sorry to hear about the crappy times. My DP is the same. I try and get him to DTD in the mornings sometimes but he can't perform very well then. Doesn't help that sometimes I'm like a roll on roll off ferry just to get it done.

They don't understand how hard we try to pinpoint that perfect time, which seems to allude us every month whatever we try!

This month I have only a couple of nights to try - days 9 and 10; I think I ovulate on either day 10 or 11. I have an consultation with a fertility doctor in the morning on day 11.

I'm not buying opks this month, I'm not checking CM, just going to do it those two nights. And apart from coming on here, I'm going to try my hardest not to think about it!

I'm just going to try and be healthy, take my folic acid and vitamin D. And just try and enjoy life.

... She says...

Well that's me out ladies - af is here bang on schedule 😢 Good luck to everyone else x

@ChicaXS its so frustrating, isn't it? I had a meltdown past weekend about a similar thing, except in my case it was that OH had been...erm...seeing to himself(!)...so much that he really struggled to finish during DTD in my fertile period. I could have murdered him. We were doing SMEP so every other day then 3 days in a row over ovulation. That's meant to be ideal for sperm quality too, so that there's a good amount of mature sperm available.

I had a bit of a cry after bottling it up for a while and managed to explain to him that it's not just about how often we DTD for me, it makes a difference to sperm quality/quantity. This month he seems more on board so far, so fingers crossed

Thanks ladies. Maybe I need to be more sympathetic but it’s the fact he never made an effort to deal with it when it’s been an issue for sometime. I understand the psychological stress fertility does but I was tip toeing around him, even so we don’t have sex for the whole month and just for ovulation so he can perform. Furthermore the cost to do this privately to add to my stress as it’s proven unsuccessful as we needed to have sex during the ovulation period many more times and we couldn’t. I gave him the science lesson and it didn’t resonate. I hate to say this but if we do proceed with IVF I would prefer he freezes his sperm as I have no confidence he can perform on the day. There’s something so deep rooted that he needs CBT.

It’s been a shit month but thank you for sharing your stories too, for once I don’t feel so alone! Didn’t realise it’s occurred for many of you.

Good morning all, hope all is well

@shinylovesshoes surely you can still sneak DTD. I'm with your hubby on this 😄. Good luck to you.

@LouJ85 aahh sorry to hear that. 🤞🏾 For next cycle

@ChicaXS oh hun, you have so much going on, it must be hard for you to relax. Hopefully your hubby starts to be empathetic. Good luck to you 🙏🏽🤞🏾

@selina37 nice to see you are planning to go for the more relaxed approach. Hope it works out for you 😊

@Semele5069 aahh sorry you are going through similar thing with your hubby as @ChicaXS. Really hope they( DH's) get their act together.

Welcome to @shinylovesshoes, and sorry to those with DP/DH issues. It’s a stressful enough time as it is... I’m still staying away from OPKs this month and instead tracking any twinges and noting when we are DTD. I swear we are like rabbits, cycle day 16 here and we’ve managed it 25 times already... I really hope that somehow some little swimmers have made their way to my ancient eggs. Unfortunately I’m on strong antibiotics for a tick bite and worry this could make things trickier.
For those using OPKs, any recommendations as next month will be cycle 7 and I guess I want to have a bit more focus at that stage...

@Wavesandsmilesagain wow 25 times. You've been busy. 🤞🏾 Crossed for you. I use the easy@home opk.

Twenty five times!! Impressive.

8DPO here and feeling really down. I think PMT is kicking in. Stupidly did a test (BFN obviously) because I think I miss POAS...

Not sure what's wrong me with me but after a trip to the shops I just wanted to cry about everything. Good luck to anyone due to test and sympathies with those having AF

@Wavesandsmilesagain 25 times! Amazing work!!

@Homassy still early days for you. Don't count yourself out yet. Good luck to you 🤞🏾

I am 10dpo today

@Wavesandsmilesagain I don't think we've done it 25 times all year 🤣

[quote selina37]@Wavesandsmilesagain I don't think we've done it 25 times all year 🤣[/quote]
😂😂

@Wavesandsmilesagain 25 times! Wow, impressive. We've done 8, and thought we were doing well 😂

Has anyone got any experience of getting multiple ovulation high-peak results from Clearblue advanced? I got a high and then peak from CD 13-15. Now am CD 26 and got a peak result today and yesterday. I started testing again because I was getting egg white discharge again.

My cycle might be a bit messed up and I didn't actually ovulate earlier because of the early miscarriage last month? Cycles are normally regular, but I haven't measured LH levels consistently in the past (other than the odd random test). Have been tracking my basal body temp too this month and that's fluctuating a lot.

@Wavesandsmilesagain - 25 times is v impressive! What antibiotics are you on? Some for tick bites are not recommended in women trying to conceive

For me the multiple DTD is a bit of a distraction from thinking about the potential outcome. DP is pretty happy about it all. @mouldygrapes I am on doxy-m ratiopharm and all the instructions and warnings are in German so I have no idea ... (living in Luxembourg and only speaking English and french and here there are several official languages). Fingers crossed it’s not a problematic one....

@kwastell I will be interested in everyones response to your question.
Its my first month using cb opks . Ive had my peak but alot earlier than expected. I have stopped testing now but not sure if I was supposed to carry on testing evefydsy or wait till next cycle (but hoping I dont have another cycle 🤞🤞) xx

@kwastell I've had peaks earlier than expected (but on the 2-day CB digital, the pink (not purple) one). And I knew it was false as I had no EWCM. I then had another positive 2 days later and believed then it was right.

Maybe your body tried to ovulate, didn't snd is now trying again.

You know they can pick up pregnancy too... might be worth a test. Xx