TTC after MC - June 2020 (Part 3)

[VP91x]

Hey lovelies,

New thread - currently CD17 (cycle #3) still waiting for peak OPK.

I hopefully have tagged everyone -

@SmileyT
@Rainbowhope11
@Hayleylou89
@Dipsy77
@HopeForRainbowbaby
@elliew818
@MissyBate
@MichT4
@NightDreaming
@NadJade
@Renna
@Re6ecc4
WellHurrahAndHuzzah
@ManchNic
@Jazper
@Dizzy201
@peonyrose87
@HE88
@mrsssk
@1990EM
@Chickoletta
@Tink20058
@sunflower96
@Meomeomeo
@chloedancer897
@Niisa
@Bellabubble
@Sallyjo27
@Ejb86
@Wishingfornumber2
@anaconda76
@AR52
@DontStandSoClose
@Donnat89
@Banbi
@Diorissimo1985
@DBTJ
@2020wish
@Eli2020
@NightDreaming
@Saim86

If anyone else would like to join please do❤️

@VP91x no real reason, he got really upset about it, I'm guessing it's pressure even though I've said we don't have to do it on set days and he can set the agenda, but obviously he is putting pressure on himself, I dunno 🤷🏾‍♀️ i'm just going to focus on our relationship for the next few days rather than ttc, but after a MC it's even harder to do that x

@Hayleylou89 glad it all went well and that you are being well and truly looked after this time ☺️☺️☺️

@SmileyT it’s so hard to set the balance right isn’t it? It’s like men love sex but when we need a baby from it they go all weird and pressured lol 😂 I never expected ttc to be like this... I thought it would be a breeze considering my partner had a high sex drive and now he’s feeling the pressure and having trouble some times but when I tell him we can cool down a bit and stop for now he doesn’t want too... I’m almost close to offering him if he wants to do it in a cup in his own time and I’ll use a turkey baster lol

@SmileyT I do think there is a lot of pressure on men when TTC. They have to have sex, they have to be horny, they have to finish. I think it puts a lot of stress on them (speaking from personal experience, we went through this last year). I found it was easier talking about everything and putting it all out there. We went to counselling too as recommended by our consultant.

The last few months we've actually started to enjoy sex again, it was a chore for so long. I bought sexy underwear, we started doing position of the day lol, just little things to mix it up and make it more fun

Hey @Hayleylou89 may I please ask what do you mean by "they refer you to pre term labour clinic if you've had biopsy" ? I've had cone biopsy in the past and have always been worried whether it will have any effect on me getting pregnant or staying pregnant so will be very grateful if you can kindly explain to me if having biopsy has had any impact on your pregnancy x

@chloedancer897 I've upped my game with pre-seed this cycle too. Are you using the syringe every time you are using it? I frankly didn't like the feeling at all so I wonder if it will have the same effect if you just "slap it on" 🙈 x

Welcome @bxiiboo so sorry that you have suffered a loss even more so getting that reassurance and still losing 😩.

@Hayleylou89 it's great you are being referred and hooefully you are really well looked after. When will you go to pre term clinic?

@2020wish how many dpo are you now? And CD?

@chloedancer897 I've used pre seed previous cycles but I've stopped using because apparently it isn't worth it if you normally get a fair amount of EWCM anyway. But, definitely worth a shot! Feti-lily I have too, I think its good to keep everything in!xx

I personally never told him anything about ovulating cervix etc, infact before MC I was actually acting like I didn't want a baby and talked about going on depo. Obvs now he knows I was lying as we've have 2 MC.
I feel only one of us needs to feel pressured.
You have to remember they might start feeling a little used rather than actually wanted. I would say go with the flow dont tell them anything and just act like you genuinely want some love making rather than just having sex 😏

Agree with @DBTJ my husband definitely felt a bit used after a while so that's why I've spiced it up.

@Eli2020 I've never tried it but I'll try the syringe to see. It's worth a shot!

@chloedancer897 good luck with that-I hope you find it less painful than i do. OH is actually excited I'm not keen on the syringes as he wants to use them to put jam in donuts 🤷‍♀️😂

@Eli2020 😂😂😂 good idea!

@DBTJ I also keep my DH unaware of ovulation and I don't tell him when it is time. Just go for it and spicy it up 👌 I also think so it is better for his performance 😅 and more fun haha
@2020wish im also feeling the same. I have been having cramps for few days now and I have been expecting AF any time now. Still nothing, not even light bleeding.

I'm on CD29. I had smiley on CB on CD 15, so I took CD 16 as my OV. But I have read yesterday that from smiley it can be 2 days even 5 days ( I rely on tests only ). I just want AF to come already and I will treat myself to champagne I have got in fridge ....still having small hope but I will not test until I'm late according to flo.

@VP91x 15dpo and cycle day 30

@HopeForRainbowbaby yes I wish with the cramps it would just either start AF straight away or stop! Are you going to test again in a few days? X

Update. AF has just arrived. Dunno why my temp increased this morning. Strange. I’m sure it will be low tomorrow

So sorry @2020wish ❤️❤️❤️

@2020wish I'm sorry to hear AF is there. But at least you are on your cd1. I will follow you soon I think. Will you treat yourself to something nice ?

@Wishingfornumber2 I will test in 2/3 days when period is late per flo ( but typically 28 days is max for me and I am on 29CD). What about you?

Sorry to hear AF has arrived @2020wish x

Big hug @2020wish sorry that AF came, hoping it will be FW before you know it

I'm sure I will be joining you as well in the next 2 days or so @HopeForRainbowbaby. The light spotting is still there and I think it's too long to be an implantation bleed now. Would've been amazing to get pg without a period after MC but I'd be weirdly grateful to see AF as then I know it's a proper CD1 and my body has recovered.

@2020wish my OH suggested the home insemination thing this month but not sure if he has gone off the idea. Sorry AF arrived 😩

And to all you other lovely ladies how do you avoid telling OH about your cycle, mine knows mine better than I know my own, so think I've screwed myself over a bit 😂 i also have a much higher sex drive then him so he knows I'd have it every day if I could so me wanting him is definitely not an issue 🙈 we are only 3 months in so I guess it's all a learning curve x

@HopeForRainbowbaby I think I will test Friday if still no AF by then. I will be CD34 then and looking back at my last 5 cycles the longest was 32 days. Hope AF stays away for both of us 🤞. I’m not feeling hopeful though! X

@mrsssk we are actually in the same stage of post Mc and first cycle. I feel about this same too;) Hopefully AF arrives quickly if it is coming.when af arrives, will you treat yourself to something ?

@SmileyT I don’t tell my DH when I’m ovulating but think he can guess when the time is near as I tend to initiate sex but usually it’s the other way round lol! Maybe don’t mention anything to him for the next month about cycles etc and so will be a guessing game for him! X

@Wishingfornumber2 unfortunately we can't hurry up the process. I wish AF makes its mind up already 😅
@SmileyT well just go for it the whole cycle frequently ;) then he will not know haha mine doesn't ask much about cycle and doesn't know much about it . So I keep it like that 👌

@VP91x My nearest Ikea is in Southampton, but apparently it is super busy at the mo - and has been sonce opening 😕 so I might avoid for a while lol! Shelves can wait haha (as much as I want them nowwwww!!) I totally agree with you about having people acknowledge how shit the situation was and not trying to be positive! I was super honest with my friend who is 2 weeks ahead if where I should have been, and was saying how whilst I took the mc very pragmaticly, I have struggled more now as I realised how much time has passed and also just how many blooming friends and family members seem to be announcing pregnancies! She was brilliant - said it was so shit but also that she is really rooting for me and can’t wait for the day I get to be a mum as I’ll be great etc - it definitely gave me a boost!

I’m considering NOT opk-ing this month 😱 I have nkticed that I get my peak, so we dtd lots but nc has then consistently said I ovulate the day after - and I wonder whether we sre leaving it too late - as iften we start off woth good intentions for smep - then tail off until I get the surge! I know the day before SHOULD cover is - but I’m wondering whether maybe I get a surge and my body releases the egg really quick? So think time I’m considering just dtd daily from cd12 - as I usually ovulate either cycle day 14 or 15. I’m thinking if I don’t “know” when I’m peaking, maybe I’ll be more relaxed?

My daughter and I have ordered loads of bad food and party sweets and are having a movie-Thon day. Then tomorrow I’m going to start dieting.