Anyone TTC first baby, aged 35 or over?

[Honolulu1]

Hello ladies,

Just looking for some pals who are in similar situation to me - hopefully we can support each other in this emotional journey. I'm 35, OH is 38 and we've been TTC first baby for over 12 months overall now (11 months trying). I naively thought it would be easier (emotionally and physically) than this. We sadly miscarried early in Sept so feeling even more cheated that we don't have out BFP by now. My GP has done tests which have all come back normal and have been referred to gynaecology, 1st appt in March. No idea what to expect from that

Would love to hear from others in similar situations, for a bit of moral support. I'm currently 2dpo; feel I should be more than used to 2ww by now, but it doesn't seem to get any easier x

It's good to read everyone's stories and feel that there are so many of us out there! You all seem very organised with ovulation tracking. I need to order some new sticks after accidentally breaking mine! I thought that I was ovulating at the weekend as I had pains on Sunday, but nothing showed up on the test. Worried I'm not releasing any eggs, but hopefully being paranoid. Not done a text since then, but after a few days of no pain I now have stomach cramps again. Maybe I'm ovulating now?? All so confusing.

I didn't have any joy with temping - I get sinus problems which means I often have a slightly raised temperature if I'm fighting a minor infection (which happens almost every time I get overtired), so the app couldn't predict my ovulation at all! I'm using Ovia but I must say just with charting the dates of my period it has been absolutely bang on accurate about my period start times. I have found it matched up exactly with the OPKs when I did them, so I don't bother, and we just try and DTD as often as possible during my fertile period, especially at the beginning.

@Honolulu1 I just spotted you are being referred to fertility appointments and don't know what to expect. This is what happened to me...

I saw my GP exactly 6 months after we started trying (I'm 41) and had blood tests and internal ultrasound scans (this happened to be on d1 of my cycle and they also found out I have adenomyosis). DH had sperm tests. Everything seemed fine so we were referred on to a fertility appointment.

The doctor we saw said basically given there's nothing obviously wrong with either of us it was IVF or nothing - wouldn't bother with IUI. She said given my age a) nothing is available on NHS and b) only do 2 rounds as anything after that is a hiding to nothing at my age. She's referred me on to get my tubes checked. She was really lovely and said "don't give up!".

We then saw a private IVF specialist and got some advice. He basically said our chances were 10-15% of conception per round of IVF and live birth was half that as 50% of conceptions end in miscarriage at my age. He estimated my chances of conceiving naturally as similar. We're trying the old fashioned way for a couple more months. This guy was more like "don't get your hopes up".

I'm happy to answer any questions about appointments with the proviso I can only share my own experience and obviously I am not an expert!

@wishing3 It happened to me at first that I didn't get high levels in OPK. Try not drinking or peeing two hours before testing. It worked for me!

@TigerJoy why not bother with IUI? Isn't that the first step?

I'm 35 (OH 47) and at the end of first month ttc, but just come on 3 days early so back to the drawing board again. I stupidly ended up symptom spotting and had half convinced myself it had worked first time (oh, the delusion) so feeling a bit sorry for myself this evening. Still... back to it.

@Morgane77 no point apparently. Nothing wrong with sperm that would indicate it's necessary.

@SJChief I feel your pain. I'd convinced myself I was pregnant this month. No period yet but just test and negative

@SJChief I know what you mean, I was taught (or scared into thinking!) at school that it was so easy to get pregnant. So it makes sense that we expect it to happen straight away. It's also really easy to start paying attention to all the things that are going on in your body which were probably always there but we never noticed them before TTC...

@SJChief I know how you feel. I've been doing it like crazy this week (I'm 6 DPO). OH has told me off as he says I'm going to stress myself too much!

Hello ladies! I finally tested at 7DPO!! LOL :D
Of course it was a BFN!
TTC is madness!!

@Morgane777 😂 It was never going to say anything else? Try in a few days! Lol. You might get a better answer.

@paintfairy LOL
I have a box full of cheap strips!! The temptation was too big!

Hey ladies - the symptom spotting struggle is real – despite my best efforts to refrain from it this cycle, literally every bodily sensation I’m having today I keep thinking ‘I wonder if that’s a pregnancy symptom’. I have a weekend away planned so hopefully can take my mind off it and keep distracted.

Sound advice on temping @wheresthehope, and definitely a good thing to do if you you're left wondering about ovulation. For me though, I found it just seemed to confirm what I already knew, and gave me more to stress about, so I’m feeling a sense of freedom from having ditched it this month :)

So sorry for your loss @SanFrancisco49er. I hope you’re feeling better soon also (especially by the end of weekend/Monday!)– nothing worse than being ill during fertile period. I had the same thing last month, and was taking cough medicine which weirdly affected my CM! I had no idea that was a thing!

I really appreciate the info @TigerJoy – that’s interesting you had internal scan under GP care (and on CD1 – can I ask if it was planned to be that day or just by chance?) – my GP has done the blood tests and OH sperm tests, so maybe I’ll be offered the internal scan at the clinic.

Now to avoid the temptation to test for the next week :)

Thanks for the tip Morgane777.

Morning ladies, CD5 here, just gearing up to start OPK testing tomorrow or the next day. Does anyone know with the CB sticks whether you should use the same holder or start a new one? Last month I never got a peak reading so I'm wondering whether to just start afresh with a new holder or it's better to use the one which already has a baseline reading?!

@Bearhug9 I read that it's best to keep using the same holder with all the sticks because it remembers your baseline. It's annoying you can't buy test sticks separately!

Hello Ladies!
How's everyone doing? Any good news on this thread??

Not from me yet 😢 period arrived yesterday

Hi @Morgane777, got my flashing smiley face this morning, just hope it turns static this month . How are you doing? Sorry to hear that @claireb707 .

None from me. Expecting AF on Saturday. I stupidly did a test on Sunday and got a BFN which made me feel rubbish but it could have been too early. I guess I'll know in a few days! x

The waiting is awful. I'm 12-13dpo, and took a test this morning BFN. Feel like AF is on her way so feeling a bit rubbish. I had a letter from gynaecology this morning too, cancelling my appointment in March, and no replacement offered. When I called they said there were no appointment atm. But fortunately my GP has refered me to another hospital as just been to see her in tears 😢

Hoping one of us gets some positive news soon x

Hello ladies,
I'm sorry @claireb707! Another period, another cycle of hope!
@Bearhug9 what CD are you?
@EB211, @Honolulu1... I also took a test yesterday, at 11 dpo! And got a BFN! :(
AF expected tomorrow and I know is coming! I started spotting a few days ago and that's always the sign it's coming!
And I'm having trouble controling my emotions... feeling sad and angry... I guess is PMS. Having a lot of acne too!
Well, not my best month! I hope that my cycle starting tomorrow will be better!

@Honolulu1 I hope you'll get an appointment soon!
Hoping as well for positive news for all of us!

That must have been so frustrating @Honolulu1, it sounds like your GP was supportive though. I waited ages to get my bloods done first time as I worried I would be wasting their time but my GP was also really helpful. @morgane777 I got the first flashing smiley on CD8, I'm day 10 now and it's still flashing....Last month I had 10 days of flashing and no peak so I stopped testing. I think I ended up ovulating about CD28 in the end . Hoping for good news for us all too x

Anyone had a nabothian cyst? Found a lump at the end of last week, saw doc this morning and she thinks it's one of those but is referring me to get it checked anyway.

@Adrianoska here's one 😊