ttc after mc July/August 2007 - shiny new thread as the other was full

[winemakesmummyclever]

Hi,

I hope nobody minds me adding a new thread, but the other wouldn't let me reply.

LadyLush - Sorry to hear about your loss . In answer to your question, I thought I was around 11-12 weeks pg, but the scan said the baby was around 8-9 weeks. When I'd had the ERPC, the gynae reg said the uterus was around 14weeks and the baby was still 8-9 weeks.
I'm sure things do get better with time, but things are still pretty raw and new for me. I'm glad things are getting back to normal for you (and hopefully for others too).

Ronshar - I spent much of my nurse training drunk also Erm, the uterus surface is flat apparently (according to the dr).

Marvelous we may have been at the same college. He He.
I shall look it up tomorrow. I am very tired now as dd1 was up at 4 moving her bloody hamster around as it woke her up!
I feel like I have done a night shift again. (never again)

ILTC, I sure hope you're in bed and in a dream land right now!

Just read your story though. GULP double GULP I hope NOTHING happens until tomorrow 8 am. I am not sure I am as strong as you're to go through such experience!!! I just have to last until my D&C tomorrow. And you know what my other scare is? If my dh saw me in pain like that ? no way in heck he?ll go for TCC again. He already thinks I?ve been through enough. So I can?t risk it with this delicate one of mine

As far as c-sections go - I am a "frequent flyer." I had 2 and I have to say - you know what ILTC says about natural MC rather than D&C? Well, that is exactly how I feel about labor/ delivery/vaginal rather than c-section. If we are lucky to have another child - c-section it is for us all the way!

You don't feel any pain, when you're handed over your bundle of love you're alert, not tired and can play with him/ her right away, etc. Yes, there is some recovery aching around the incisions but I've heard some quite painful stories about v. labor and tiering and... I'd rather have a c-section. Now, that's just me

nope still not in bed

my dp was trying to make me laugh bysaying stop faking it you drama queen etc

Drama queen? Just smack him or and when you can do it... you know what I mean... just tell him you're not in the mood. And when he gets all upset - make sure you tell him that he is being a drama king! LOL Yes, I am evil like that

Night night girls. Will catch up with you tomorrow.

ladylush - both my m/c's were mid trimeser and I had to go through labour and delivr them both. It was awfully painful probably more physically than mentally unlike the babies were born and then I felt numb physically but was really distraught when I saw my babies. I wouldn't have liked to have had a c-section as it would have prolonged the pain. Though if I had an early mc I would opt for a erpc as it's quite often needed even if things are left to go natrually.

lol katendmom ill get him back dont worry even yesterday he kept saying to his mate, i dont know what all the fuss is about it didnt hurt! i couldnt feel a thing but i know hes only doing it to make me laugh!!

The best of luck to you today and hope everything goes smoothly for you xx just glad you dont have to go through what i went through xx

goingfor3 - that is so awful. I think that would be terribly difficult for anyone to get over. Was there a reason for the mid trimester m/c? Must be terribly unlucky to have two. I have an ex-colleague who's wife had a stillborn baby as it died during the birth. It was terribly sad. She is now pregnant again and due in February (this happened 2 years ago)so we all have everything crossed for them.

Do I smell cakes? Northern cakes? Oh yeah, sign me up for that one Jules! I'm sure Kensgirl would be up for it too - anyone else? Where are you Jules?

Wow, you guys were chatty last night. Hope everyone is getting along ok.

Kateandmom - so sorry that you're going through this, but I think that the ERPC is the best route to take if you have other kids to consider. I have 2 friends who have had the medical management and because of what they went through, I never even considered it for me.

Ilts - so glad that you are in the recovery stage now. Did tell you that you'd need lots of painkillers. I remember having had 2 paracetamol, 2 brufen, 2 tramadol & 1 codydramol (that was the max pain relief I could safely have at home)in the space of two hours when I started bleeding properly. It really was like labour. God, it was great to go to A&E get some morphine IYKWIM. Don't mean to sound flippant, but the ERPC was a doddle in comparison, but then, I did get the 2nd hunkiest anaesthetist in the trust (after my dh, of course) which helped matters . Come to think of it, he was on call when I had ds. Think Dr XYZ may be stalking me and my fanjita

Jules - so proud of you, taking everything you have been through and making a positive changes to help so many others. You go girl! Still, don't forget to look after you too!

Lissie - hope that the move went ok. Presume you are living out of boxes atm. Hope you get settled soon.

Ronshar & Ladylush - are you saying that we should have attended some nursing lectures..... One of our tutors used to scout through the SU bar looking for student nurses. We used to put lit. crit. books on the table next to us and enagage in earnest debate about Kafka if she appeared. [guilty grin] It actually worked as tutors never recognised you out of class anyway!

Right, I'm off for a shower and a day in Dublin's museums.

yes you did (at not listening) ive learnt my lesson lol

Just wanted to add hugs for ((goingfor3)).

Don't like to say told you so but I also warned of the need for strong painkillers - it's always worse than you imagine with sadly nothing to show for it at the end

wmmc - whilst in Dublin go to Avoca if you get the chance. Lovely shop (off Grafton St.)they sell some gorgeous things. Pmsl at the fake kafka debates. Our lecturers never bothered to look for us when we went missing. Mind you, they got strict with the attendance after the first semester and made us all sign a register. If attendance dropped to less than 80% the student was interviewed and if it continued they were dropped from the course.

you ladies are so strong - some really intense stories here - when you have to go through experiences like that it must make you a different (stronger, more rounded) person. i suppose it must be kind of sad to let go of the old innocent you to become someone who has been through painful times,(without getting jaded too.) what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, I guess. i am in awe.

i have been relatively upbeat recently and pretty much ok throughout since the m/c happened . . .
but my old friend just called to say she is 4 months p/g and engaged to her man and it was hard to muster up genuine happiness in my voice. i am pleased for her but gutted for myself. i guess it just wasn't my time . . .

but i did tell her about the m/c a few weeks ago, so it was really sensitive of her to wait before telling me her news.

i just feel . . .winded today and find it hard to blink back tears here at work. maybe my af is coming too, which always makes it a little bit more difficult to keep it together about anything upsetting.

Ilts - I just thought that I was being a wuss on the pain front. I am a great exponent of the "manage the pain before it becomes unbearable, otherwise it'll need more analgesia" theory. I'm the only one out of my family who would be popping pills fora headache, the rest of them would be outside hugging a tree and eating par-boiled joss-sticks .

I know the experience is different for everyone, so didn't want to push the issue with you. Glad to see there is another "drama queen" though . Hopefully, you will never have to go through it again.

Ladylush - we had a register too. Only pegged off lectures that were totally pointless & dull. Management & research modules - jaysus, how bad were they?

ladylush - fingers crossed for you friend. My first at 20 weeks was possibly due to an incomptent cervix and my second happened because I had measles so neither were connected I have just been very unlucky.

by the way jules, i think its an amazing idea . . . what a great attitude to have too - women will really appreciate having a sanctuary where others know what they have been through.

drama queen??? moi??? Never!!! even if i do cry for an hour if i bang my toe and sulk if i cant get what i want

Hello girls,
Hope you don't mind me joining your thread, I was told about it by MrsMc on the pregnancy thread
I was 6 weeks pregnant, and started to spot on sunday evening, thought the bleeding had stopped on Monday, but when I went to the loo I passed the embriotic sac. The EPU confirmed on Tuesday that I had had a "complete miscarriage" The pregnancy test they took was still positive, I took another one this morning and it is now negative, so it looks like I can try again ASAP. I had also miscarried on 30th Apri at 5weeks and 2 days!
I do already have children but just have an overwhelming urge to have one more baby before I return back to work when my career break finishes(I am quite old!)I have found that people do not expect you to grieve if you already have children so talking about it to any one I know is a "no no" Hope you don't mind me joining your group??

of course not, the more the merrier we are like a little family here and im new!!!!

Hi Emmsy, of course you are more than welcome. I also had a mc after earlier children and you are right, people do seem to think that you should just shrug it off as you already have the others. I'm sorry you had to be here, but please make yourself at home.

Hi everybody and welcome Emmsy - so sorry you had to join us here.
I wish I'd read all your posts before I booked an appointment at the private hospital for medical management next Monday... I'm now thinking I should cancel that and opt for the ERPC and just get it over with, even though I'm terrified of the operation.
The spotting I had yesterday hasn't got any worse and the cramps have stopped so I don't think anything is going to happen naturally.
DH and I are off to Holland tomorrow for a long weekend (booked before we knew about all this obviously) so I'm hoping nothing happens whilst I'm over there. We spent a year living in Holland and we were planning to tell all our friends there the good news this weekend . Oh well, perhaps the change of scene will take my mind off things a bit.
Hope you're all OK.

Hi Emmsy, so sorry for your loss - you have been through a horrid time.

My friend was really well when I spoke to her last night - she is taking great comfort from her 8month old DD. What she has been through has been so traumatic, though, that she now says she doesn't want to have any more kids. I hope she changes her mind but how bad is that that the NHS treat women so bad that they are put off ever having more children! When they scanned her there wasn't much there so I suppose the MC was already well under way which is why they have sent her away. But she is in a lot of pain. I still think they should offer everyone surgery. She just wants it to be over, of course.

I am still plodding along - CD18 now and my temp was high again this morning so I think I either OV'd on Sunday or Tuesday. Fingers crossed!

I'm glad I was told about this thread!
There are some remarkable people here, I have only just read through alot of the stories and have found myself wanting to cry for the pain that some of you have been through! Your r all an inspiration to each other and I hope you all get BFP's as soon as possible, It would be nice for us all to "graduate" to the pregnancy thread together!
I was told that I could TTC as soon as I wanted to but they would prefer it for me to wait until I have had 1 normal period, they did not mention anything about infection? I took an ovulation test on Tuesday and it showed Positive could this be right as I only started to bleed on Sunday and had the complete M/C on Monday morning or could it be the small amounts of HCG affecting the ovulation test?? I thought that it was normal to "O" approx 14 days after M/C?
Anyway I must go for now as DH wants to use the PC and we only have 1, so CU soon xx

Emmsy - you only have one PC???

The OPK could have been positive because of HCG in your system so it was probably that. I don't know when you'd normally OV after MC but I know your cycles can get really messed up so don't expect it to be the normal 28 days for a good few months.

Some people don't wait for their period to start ttcing again but I found it very therapeutic to give myself a month off before ttc again. It was only when I started to ttc again that I began to feel terrible about not being PG (and not being able to get PG).

Just an anecdotal story, but when I had my MC in March there was another woman on the Miscarriage boards who got PG just three weeks after her MC. She lost that baby too which was awful to deal with. I am not saying everyone who gets PG straight after MC will have another but I do think your body may not quite be ready so soon after MC.

Good luck anyway!