Over 40's TTC loads of baby dust to all... 5

[Chatbash72]

Hope this works as we lots the thread

@Chatbash72 thank you, will check that out xx

@Starlight39 will have a look as I really need to do something, you'd think this would be the motivation I need but I weigh more than ever. Possibly self sabotaging!

Yeah I definitely think a break from thinking about it is needed.

Well I'm off to Poland on Monday with 2 of my best friends so that will be nice. I'm dreading leaving DS but I know I'll be ok when I get there and DS will love a few days just with Daddy.

@ecostats that's really kind of you to think of me. It all came to nothing I'm afraid. My period came yesterday and I have really decided to stop trying.

It's a shame really because I can still get pregnant just the eggs aren't good enough. I am 47 though so that's fair enough!

I felt so disappointed this time. I see a counsellor and have started trying to work out why I want another child so much. I tried to adopt a couple of years ago, but but two of my dc have additional needs and they were concerned about the impact it would have on them.

In my head the reason I want another is because being a parent makes me happy and feel good about myself because I am caring for someone. I had a weird upbringing and I'm beginning to wonder if I am trying to create what I didn't have so I can enjoy it, albeit from an adult perspective.

Anyway, that got a bit too detailed!!! I wish you all the very best and lots of baby creating luck. You all deserve it so much #goteverythingcrossed :D

@claireb707 have you tested yet?? Fingers crossed for you.

@MaryShelley1818 that's so lovely that you're going away to Poland with friends. I'm sure your DS will be fine and you'll be OK once you've gone. I went away for a few days for the first time when DS was 2 and I was anxious beforehand but it was fine (for both of us!). In fact, he slept through every night for his Dad having almost never slept through for me .

@MrsBobDylan sorry to hear you've decided to stop trying. It sounds a good plan to discuss it all with your counsellor - really hope it helps .

I think my period is just starting. It's a bit of a pain as I have the weekend with DP (DS is at his Dad's) and wanted to have some non-baby making sex! Still, it's best I'm not actually pregnant for now and my body has got back to normal quick after the MC so that's good I guess.

I did an ic test yesterday and today, both negative. Not sure what's going on, lots of cm as well

Temp gone up again today

@MrsBobDylan I'm so very sorry to hear that, really sad news. Thinking of you, it sounds like you have a lot of love to give xx

@Starlight39 yeah, fingers crossed it will be a bit of an escape. I went to Spain for 4 days with the girls for my 40th when DS was 5mths but tbh looking back I was suffering from terrible pnd at the time so it was very different. He's my little bestie now.

@claireb707 fingers crossed for you xx

My period is just starting today bang on time, not surprised at all but still feeling sad and disappointed. Every month is just another sign that it's less and less likely to happen.

I've spent the day with 5 of my class mates from University today (I go one day a week) as we're having to put together a big presentation to be delivered to a panel next Thursday....that should be interesting as we're only back from Poland the day before! Lol.

@MrsBobDylan, I'm sorry that it turned out that way, it's completely understandable that you are disappointed. Hope is a great thing but reality sucks sometimes. It sounds like the counsellor could be a good resource. Xx

@MrsBobDylan I'm sorry to hear that. I agree about counselling. I think the whole thing is very stressful and the decision of when to stop trying is the hardest of all. I hope you're ok.

I've just been for my hospital appointment. It said to leave 2 to 3 hours but I was out in 15 mins. The upshot is it doesn't look like there's anything specifically wrong, which means there's nothing they can do for me. He said to keep trying but that he thought it unlikely I would be able to have a successful pregnancy as we've been trying for about a year and a half. And obviously it's down to my age. So that was nice. I'm not sure what I was expecting but I suppose I thought they may be able to try chlomid but apparently there's no point if it looks like I'm ovulating. I had heard that it can be used even if you are ovulating.

Going to keep trying. Hope everyone has a nice weekend x

@Springroll89, it may be different circumstances but I was told recently by a consultant that 18 months is not an unreasonable amount of time to have been trying. Given that you have had pregnancies in that time, you must have a certain level of fertility. It sounds positive news that nothing specific has shown up but the 'unlikely to have a successful pregnancy' advice you received doesn't sound quite right to me.

Hoping it's just early days and a positive will show up for you soon @claireb707

@MaryShelley1818 sorry your period came. At least you have your trip to take your mind off things a little. Hope the presentation goes well!

@Springroll89 sorry to hear they didn't have any suggestions at your appointment. Hope you're feeling OK. Have you tried Soy isoflavones?

Sadly Im out 😢period has arrived this morning
Onto month 8 of trying, have a doc appointment Monday to see if I can get checked out

So sorry @claireb707 . Hope the doctors appointment helps.

Oh I'm sorry to hear that @claireb707 as @ecosats said I guess we just have to keep trying and it's not been that long in the scheme of things. I hope the dr can tell you something useful.

Thanks for the advice @ecostats I've had 1 chemical pregnancy in about 16 months of trying. But he said that was enough to know at least one tube isn't blocked and therefore no need to check for blockages.

He said that a 40 year old who's just starting trying has about a 50% chance in a year but he put my chances at lower as we've tried for a while (and I'm nearly 42). But you're right, I've known people a lot younger try for 18 months before having success and there's been nothing specific wrong. It's just when you're over 40 you know the reason!

Thanks @starlight39 I've not heard of those and will look into them. I've just started acupuncture again and ordered a clearblue fertility monitor. One thing the consultant did say is that you can't tell just from CM and how you feel when you ovulate and that using ovulation tests is important. Or just DTD 3 times per week.

Oh and he said that all women TTC should be taking vitamin D. I just started on vitamin D3 a couple of weeks ago

Hi Ladies.

What an up and down ride it is for us all.

Sorry af arrived @claireb707 I too have a dr scheduled on Monday- I'd like to find out if my thyroid level is a problem- everything I read is conflicting.

I'm on cycle day 21. I guess about 7-8dpo. Of course I've already tried POAS and of course it was negative...but I've got a big box of IC so don't feel bad using them. I'm going to test again this weekend, I'll probably cave and do it Saturday morning. And of course I'm symptom spotting- have mild period-type cramping- but I'm sure it's nothing.

@Springroll89, we are quite similar then! I'm also coming up to 42, one MC in 19 months of trying. I was told the same about my tubes but opted for a private HyCoSy in the end for piece of mind. One of my tubes wasn't blocked but it took a few goes to get the dye through. The consultant said he thinks about 5% chance each month of success when TTC naturally (but that's using the 16th century French stats so probably it's a bit higher than that).

For vitamin D, is there a difference between a spray or does a tablet as part of a multivitamin give the same dosage?

@ecostats the naturopath/nurse I spoke to said that for vitamin d3 it should be at least 1000iu and at least 2000iu over the winter. She didn't mention a difference between sprays and tablets but said it had to be taken with some fat (so at mealtimes).

Yes looks like we're in the same boat age wise and length of trying!

@PMB123 I know exactly how you feel. I can't keep my fingers away from IC tests from about day 20. At least it stops me spending money on expensive tests! I got my 1st faint BFP on an IC at day 24 (unfortunately not a sticky pregnancy) so they're obviously fairly sensitive! Good luck x

Thanks @Springroll89, I'm stocked up on vit D now

I was told by the doc when we first started trying to yo back and see them if we had no luck after 6 months.

I'd rather know now if there's reasons we can't manage it - suspect it's me - low thyroid, possible cysts on ovaries, my age blah blah

Hi all just popping in for quick update. Baby was born at 37 weeks via c section earlier this week.

For those who are new or who haven't seen me posting. I'm 41 I've had three previous losses. Missed miscarriage at 9 weeks before my current toddler who I had at 39, then tfmr at 13.5 weeks (conceived when toddler was 5/6 months) - fetal hydrops, cystic hygroma found at 12 week scan and later diagnosed as t21 pregnancy. Then 8 months later a miscarriage and then pregnant the next cycle.
This baby is the result of that pregnancy, he's currently healthy and content, passed all his checks etc. The latter part of the pregnancy was very difficult, apparently I had some accelerated growth, according to growth scans, tested positive for gest diabetes at 32 weeks, was told I had an off the scale large baby, he was also breech/transverse (changed from day to day) diagnosed with polyhydriamnos (excess fluid) consuktant decided baby was coming out early. Good job as when I went into hospital for steroid injections I had my bloody show and then regular contractions started. Luckily nothing happened until the day of my elective c section and baby was born nice and safely, although there were further complications as my uterus wouldn't contract and they had to sew my uterus up to stop the bleeding. Anyway, baby was on 57th percentile for weight.

So despite a very anxious end to my pregnancy what I wanted to say was it can happen for you ladies too. Don't stop trying. I didn't change my lifestyle, I still glugged a fair bit of wine (prior to pregnancy) took folic acid and vit d, had sex every day near ovulation and just hoped the right egg would come along. No other supplements or changes to lifestyle. I'm reasonably healthy, but I'm not really a fruit eater and not overly conscious about suoerfoods etc when it comes to food. My partner is also older than me.

Just had a catch up of thread. Congratulations @NicLondon1 on getting to your 12 week scan and @Russkispy, have my fingers crossed that all goes well for you this time. X

Congratulations @rubyroost ! It sounds like you had a very hard time of it and I hope you have a lot of support to recover. But it's wonderful to hear your baby is safely with you!

@Springroll89 it was a tough last few months, but I know it could have been so much worse. I had really good care, the top consuktant did my c section and am really pleased he made the decision he did- to take him out at 37 weeks.

@Rubyroost congratulations. So happy for you after all you went through. As one woman who had a much wanted second child in her 40s to another, we are so lucky. Enjoy him!

@PetraRabbit We are! I feel so blessed.