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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Smug? Please answer honestly

106 replies

Basil90 · 01/10/2019 08:43

Hi all,

A bit of an odd question to ask perhaps - but if you fell pregnant quickly, do you feel smug about it?

Please only respond if you're able to answer honestly.

Thanks

OP posts:
57Varieties · 01/10/2019 11:08

Not at all. Why would I? It was something I had no control over. I felt very lucky, but not smug, and I really hope I didn’t come across as such.

Yutes · 01/10/2019 11:12

I think it’s easy to perceive people who fell pregnant easily/quickly as smug to someone who is struggling to do the same.

And it’s ok to be a bit jealous about it. Just don’t settle in there.

Babyg1995 · 01/10/2019 11:14

Smug no but surprised it happened so quickly especially with dc no 3 as we are a bit older now.

SecretWitch · 01/10/2019 11:24

I conceived easily with all three children. I felt thrilled and astonished. I am disabled with some odd bone structure. I was happy I could become pregnant and give birth like ‘normal’ women.

I watched my beloved friend struggle for years to become pregnant. My heart goes out to anyone dealing with infertility.

User3468793 · 01/10/2019 12:43

Speaking totally honestly, I was bit surprised and proud that it happened quickly. I was over 30 and it seems like everyone only talks about how difficult getting pregnant is. The pride wasn't at all "smugness" at the fact that other people were failing, but I think it's acceptable to admit that you can be proud of something which you expected to be more difficult.

whatthehek · 01/10/2019 12:45

I've never felt smug about being highly fertile. If anything, it's made me consider options of being a surrogate of some sort.

What an odd post.

itwasalovelydreamwhileitlasted · 01/10/2019 12:56

Guessing the OP won't be back.....not sure why they would write such an inflammatory post and then disappear.....

theoriginalmadambee · 01/10/2019 13:01

Guessing OP is out ditching her friends Smile.

Confused38 · 01/10/2019 13:27

What terrible friends to have! Who would want friends like that!

verticality · 01/10/2019 13:29

Oh this is very, very definitely A Thing.

WhizzingFizzbee · 01/10/2019 13:30

Took me 3 days to get pregnant. I wouldn’t feel smug but I don’t see anything wrong with being happy or announcing it, it’s a great thing to happen. Why rain on someone else’s parade because you might have issues.

mumofftwo · 01/10/2019 13:33

Never tried for my first 2 so I dont know but am currently trying for number 3 but I wouldn't feel smug about it

SecondTimeCharm · 01/10/2019 13:35

nope, mostly surprised and slightly overwhelmed as hadn’t had much chance to mentally prepare. occasionally feel a little guilty about it knowing it can be difficult for others

verticality · 01/10/2019 14:04

"Took me 3 days to get pregnant."

Why do you feel the need to mention that like it's some sort of personal achievement? Why can't you just say "We haven't experienced the struggle, but ..."

Lacking in compassion and classless.

PurpleDaisies · 01/10/2019 14:06

"Took me 3 days to get pregnant."

How do you expect people to respond to that?

Whoops75 · 01/10/2019 14:38

mostly surprised and slightly overwhelmed as hadn’t had much chance to mentally prepare

I felt like this too.
I also felt anxious that because I hadn’t trouble conceiving that something else would go wrong.

Such an emotional time.

WhizzingFizzbee · 01/10/2019 14:39

Maybe a ‘congratulations, good for you?’ My experience won’t be spoiled for a minority of people.

StylishMummy · 01/10/2019 14:40

I felt guilty, so many friends were trying for 12-18m and we fell pregnant within 2 weeks with a very wanted baby. But then I gave birth at 28 weeks and friends went full term, so swings and roundabouts. No smugness, fucking awful term

OneForTheRoadThen · 01/10/2019 14:43

No not at all. The way I see it is conception wasn't my struggle but plenty of other things are.

Probablyshouldbecleaning · 01/10/2019 14:46

I had a loss and when a friend came to tell me privately about her own pregnancy (she knew about my loss) she was grinning from ear to ear and said something very flippant about my pregnancy being over when hers was beginning. I'd say she was smug about it. I've never forgotten what she said and how she told me. Or forgiven her tbh.

Only a certain type of person would be smug about one persons pain while they had by pure chance of Mother Nature been lucky.

earlynightneeded · 01/10/2019 14:58

Not smug at all! I actually was scared shirtless and was shocked it happened so quickly and I was v unprepared 😂

Whoops75 · 01/10/2019 15:03

I’m sitting in the CAHMS waiting room with my easily conceived child.

If I was smug I’d have nobody to talk too and nobody would empathize.

Smug people must be very lonely when things get hard.

kitchensinkdrama19 · 01/10/2019 15:18

I wouldn't say smug but I have a great sense of empathy for those who haven't conceived. Life isn't fair.

ivfbabymomma1 · 01/10/2019 15:25

I had to have ivf and luckily my first round of ivf was successful and I now have an 11 week old baby boy! Smug? Absolutely not! Eternally grateful and proud of my body? Absolutely! There is a lot of focus on not only infertility but also miscarriage and it was the first time I had been pregnant and thankfully I didn't miscarry! But I would never ever feel smug about this! Just absolutely and eternally grateful!

Aria2015 · 01/10/2019 15:37

Not at all. In my experience falling pregnant quickly doesn't guarantee anything anyway - I fall pregnant very easily, but I don't stay pregnant sadly.