A whole load of “up yours” to ttc

[Chefwifelife]

I saw a post like this on a non conception board and thought it was quite funny and cathartic so I thought I’d start one.

I’ve got a whole bag of “up yours” to the trying to conceive process. Who wants one?! I’ll start.

Up yours to 10 months of ttc #2 and everyone telling me it’s quicker the second time around as your body knows what to do.

Up yours to indent lines on one step tests and frer’s

Up yours to people telling me to “relax and it will happen”.

Up yours to the age gap which is quickly getting bigger and bigger between DS1 and potential DC2.

That’s me done.

I'm with you @crazychemist...

Up yours to my brain telling me I feel nauseous, and getting hopeful about morning sickness (seriously brain - morning sickness will not start 12 hours after ovulation. Stop teasing me!!)

Up yours to 11 months of TTC, to being convinced all the symptoms are there, to getting AF and to the app now saying I ovulated on CD11, not 15 as it originally said. There I said it. Bugger to all of it!

Yes to so many of these!!

Adding "up yours" to people who ask (after admittedly being unaware that we recently lost our 2nd baby) if we think we'd like to have another, as if the thought had never entered our minds before they so helpfully suggested it 🙄

Up yours to the guilt I'm feeling after my best friend telling me she's 12 weeks pregnant. I love her to bits and I'm very happy for her but it's 2 months since my miscarriage and it's opened up a healing scar, I'm sure I'll get it give her that news one day 🤞🏼

I love this thread! Definitely made me chuckle which is exactly what I've been needing!

Up yours to waiting for what feels like a lifetime for "the right time" to start TTC, and the journey taking much longer than hoped.

Up yours to our friends who have announced their pregnancy after their first try.
Up yours to the same friend who moans about their precious pregnancy every day and that it "sucks"!
(I'm sure pregnancy is extremely difficult at times, but what I would give anything to be pregnant!)

Up yours to waiting until we can move out of our flat.

Up yours to my spinal problems which mean it's medically unadvisable for us to be TTC in the next 6 months to a year at least until I complete physio.

Up yours to the friend who exclaimed "oh my god l, you're pregnant" when ordering a decaf coffee

Up yours to every fucking relative I saw at the weekend asking coded and not so coded "are you TTC?" questions.

Wanting to TTC but not being able to makes my heart ache.

Up yours to the constant 'no babies yet?' I've only been married 2 months!

Up yours to the also constant 'it will be you next'

Up yours to the colleague who asked if I wanted to buy all his DS baby clothes. Even though he was being nice it just reminded me that I didn't need them yet.

Up yours to my former naive self who told my manager I would be TTC so as to help plan succession planning for mat leave. Who has then told all other senior managers. She is my friend but now I feel like I'm not the only one symptom spotting!

Up yours to thinking you might be pregnant as surely you are peeing more than usual? Or was it just too much tea?

Up yours to having a grasp on my cycles and throwing a MC into the works means I have no fci*g idea what day I’m on, is it classed as AF is it cycle day one, does this mean I won’t ovulate till 2027! I mean come the hell on body!

And a massive up yours to me poas when I should have just assumed my weird AF was just that and maybe I’d never have known I was preggo in the first place. That feels better.

@Chefwifelife
I count the heaviest day of bleeding as cycle day 1 or the day you pass the sac or deciduous caste (after 5 mc this formulae has usually worked out about right for me) x

Up yours to AF coming two days early. Whilst it saved me having to wait to find out, it’s just another month that I’m not pregnant.

Up yours to people that tell me to 'just enjoy all the sex'

Up yours to DH's sperm count unexpectedly deteriorating to 7 million without an explanation.

Up yours to now having to contend with low sperm count, unexplained recurrent miscarriage, erectile dysfunction and erratic cycles. 👍🏻

Love this thread

Up yours to 16 months of trying and no hint a BFP
Up yours to waiting five years to have second child so we were ‘ready’ and finding out my body wasn’t/isn’t/might never be again
Up yours to the mums I see from school who say things like we have three ‘because we love children’.....oh I have one because I don’t love children
Up yours to the school mums who ask when I’m having another and a mum with three older kids from her first marriage and one from second saying I know what it’s
like to have one when the older three are at their dads, and they get so lonely don’t they?

This thread has made me laugh and cry. Seriously @Chefwifelife I had to double take the post because your op is literally me right now. And @waitingforarainbow I'm so sorry for your losses I'm right there with you having had my 3rd mc this year (5 total in 5 years) in August. We're just starting our journey into investigations I have my first appt on Tuesday.

Anyway.

Up yours to waking up and obsessing over temping every morning

Up yours to panicking my husband is going to open the window at night and screw up my BBT because it's so cold outside

Up yours to my husband having to work away three days a week and my ovulation days always falling on those days

Up yours to the disciplinary I'm facing at work for absences signed off by a doctor due to recurrent mcs

Up yours to being at high risk of early menopause at 29!

Up yours to the terror and heartbreak I feel about ever getting and staying pregnant again

But most importantly up yours to whatever fucking god it was that decided to take away my friends baby girl 9 hours after she was born

Up yours

Up yours to the DH who doesn't seem to grasp the concept of fertile days and is always "too tired" to DTD when it matters, then comments every time AF comes "I can't believe your not preggo yet" ... (just me?)

@Gurtie28 nooo, not just you at all. My DP is the same, except he is totally oblivious about AF.

I get so frustrated when I manage to identify ovulation day and he's just not interested. We've been ttc for 18 months, but it honestly feels like I'm the only one 'trying'.

He never took any interest in contraception and left me to make the decisions and arrangements; now it feels the same with conception. If it weren't for the wistful look on his face when we see friend's babies I would swear he'd forgotten about ttc altogether 😒.

up yours to the NHS fertility lottery..... we had a referral 18 months ago DP said he wanted to wait - they have now changed the eligibility and he feels too old...... so a massive up yours to DP too

To staying in fucking miserable job for the last 2.5 years....

To being obsessed to the point that it is taking over everything...and at 39 I'm thinking of leaving my DP and wonderful step children because I can't bear the resentment....

Can i join?

Up yours to ttc for 16 months and to finally getting our bfp only to end in mmc at 9 weeks

Up yours to seemingly breaking the cycle and conceiving 3 months later only to end in mmc at 9 weeks

Up yours to being told on my 36th birthday that my second baby wasn't viable

Up yours to the shitty fibroid that grew in my last pregnancy and now needing surgery to remove so we can't ttc

Up yours to the friends and family who has deserted us since the second mc because I told you I'm not OK and struggling and you respond with... Silence

Up yours to long nhs waiting lists for recurrent miscarriage testing (feel bad about this one as I guess it means lot of people are in the same boat 😔)

Up yours to me for eating through your emotions so now no clothes feel comfortable and feeling fat and frumpy

Up yours to nearly 2 years ttc and my first due date coming up with nothing to show for it

Up yours to feeling scared about the future and feeling in a constant state of anxiety

@MissBridgetJones

Oh ladies Sunday is bringing in some very worthy and heart-wrenching up yours to ttc. It may be a day of rest but not for this thread. Keep em coming! And lots

I'm having an up yours kind of day too

Up yours to family who haven't once asked during 2nd ivf cycle last month how I was and how it went

Up yours to looking at my calendar and seeing all the due dates that never came (including Xmas day this year!)

Up yours to looking in the mirror and seeing the 9 very visible scars from 2 ruptured ectopic surgeries on my stomach - a permanent and in your face reminder I'm now forever infertile

Up yours to being the 1% who suffers from recurrent miscarriage (5 plus 2 ectopics)

My up yours is to being in the fertile window and feeling so disheartened with everything that I don't even want to try because I can't deal with another month of disappointment when AF inevitably shows up, but then knowing I'll regret it we don't try as we'll have missed a potential opportunity, even if the odds are very low of us conceiving naturally. It's such a mind-f*!

Adding more today...

Up yours to having to wait until December for my fibroid removal operation 😔

Up yours to not being able to ttc until next year

Ohhh I love this thread.

@MrsN2121 Absolutely up yours to the dreams. Horrible things.

Up yours to running into old colleagues from when I was a newlywed and them saying "and still no babies?"

Up yours to websites thinking me buying pregnancy tests means I need to see hundreds of ads for baby products.

Up yours to fucking baby showers. Fuck off.

Up yours to people who say "you just can't understand until you've got kids" or "speaking as a mother..."

Some new ones from me:

Up yours to not being able to plan an interesting holiday because 'I might be pregnant and won't be able to travel at that time of year' or 'there is a zika risk' when of course you never get pregnant.

Up yours (and I know this is really unreasonable) to all the people on forums who have been trying for a couple of months when you are 12 months and one mmc down who tell you that you should be like them and stay positive and who make you feel bad for admitting to having one (or several) bad days.

Up yours to partners who take no responsibility for this process and can't even book themselves in for a doctors appointment.

Up yours to wanting to do well at work but to not being able to concentrate because you've just had ANOTHER BFN.

And up you to GP's who tell you that fertility is not a priority for the NHS and regardless of age or concerns you have to wait a full year for a blood test and who dismiss your specific concerns without asking you a single question.

Oh @zoomies1 you sound like you need a massive hug. I think a lot of people on this thread can empathise with lots of what you've said. Hopefully throwing those ttc up yours out there help!