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Conception

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Original poster

The Hut of Gl/Doom Part V- for the unapologetically despondent

986 replies

duchesse · 01/08/2007 08:56

The new hut. Ta-da!

This one is a snug little basement World War 2 type nightclub, with dim lighting, snug velvet sofas, red walls and certainly no politically correct smoking bans. Occasionally certain selected men may be admitted at our convenience.

Sit down, make yourselves at home, and never, ever apologise for feeling like shit. That's about it.

OP posts:
Ready · 04/12/2007 21:14

Big hugs Lissie. So sorry I thought the hut had been disbanded - I needed to take refuge in here 10 days ago... shoulda looked harder.

merrylissiemas · 04/12/2007 21:14

ready? whats happened?

Ready · 04/12/2007 21:18

Oh, no, nothing out of the bleeding ordinary... Another CD1 rolling round again. Starting Cycle #16 - this is so not what I thought I would be doing. Sigh.

How are you?

merrylissiemas · 04/12/2007 21:22

i know

bit pissed off. feel like i dont belong on the ttc after mc thread anymore. i have no optimistic words for newbies and there are a few pg ladies that i feel pleased for but also a bit bitter. and now i feel like shit for it

Ready · 04/12/2007 21:30

You said my word of the moment... Bitter. I feel such bitterness, and I hate it. I am not normally a jealous person, but wanting a baby has really brought out the worst in me.

That said, you, and I, and everyone else who is feeling bitter (there are lots of us!) shouldn't beat ourselves up about it. It's a natural reaction to our disappointment, and so long as we are not malicious - then we should just carry on, and get over it, in our own time.

merrylissiemas · 04/12/2007 21:40

i know. im just tired now

babycheeses · 04/12/2007 21:45

It is hard and its ok to feel like this you know we all do - not being able to conceive is the hardest thing in the world as it is something you have to live with. Hang in there sleep get drunk and smoke a couple of cigarettes I did. Take time out for christmas and don't have sex fabulous!!!

Ready · 04/12/2007 21:50

PMSL at the name babycheeses

I am trying to think of all the things that I should be making the most of - sleep being top of the list - don't, and have never smoked, so a couple of cigarettes would probably make me vomit - but I know what you are saying

Lissie - It's futile me telling you to hang in there, but I know you will. I so hope that you get your BFP soon, you have been through so much and deserve another baby.

merrylissiemas · 04/12/2007 21:54

you speak sense BC.
ready, thank you for letting me moan. we are waiting for an appointment with LWH now (finally) so things arent all bad!

Ready · 04/12/2007 21:59

Oooh. Is that a specialist? Tell me more. Fingers crossed for you. I reckon that you should try and relax and enjoy xmas. That's what I am trying to do.

merrylissiemas · 04/12/2007 22:09

Liverpool Womens Hospital. it has an excellent recurrent mc unit, and they will give me the anti-biotics i need and progesterone supplements. my current consultant wouldnt even see me with my last mc

ronshar · 05/12/2007 11:33

Ah Lissie. I thought I would find you smoking crack in here again.

I am Cd 2. So no luck for me again. But you know what, it is probably just as well because I got smashed on Saturday with DH. Champagne, Vodka, Chablis. In that order.

Also I dont feel even slightly guilty. Now does that mean I have finally given up or have I accepted that which I can not change?

How are you doing Lissie? You are so strong and are really an inspiration to most of us here. It breaks my heart to think of your suffering which is almost entirely preventable but for the bad luck of where you live. I just want you to know that we are all here to support you when ever you need us.
I also know that that isnt really what you want

(Ps dont worry I hate them all & their BFPs too)

merrylissiemas · 05/12/2007 11:45

lol ronshar, thank you. i just hate feeling so helpless. and when people post that they are spotting i cant be positive. so i really should stay away from the ttc boards.

wasnt it your dirty night off?

ronshar · 05/12/2007 11:51

Yes it was. And it was fabulous. No children to demand breakfast at 7am. Shame it wasnt OV weekend.

You are not useless. You have been let down spectacularly by your health care. They should be falling over themselves to help you now. When will you hear from LWH?

I am off to a specialist Allergy clinic in London next wek. Only 5 years since I was diagnosed with loads of allergies. I really hope you dont have to wait as long.

merrylissiemas · 05/12/2007 11:54

thats dreadful!

LWH did say it would take 6w for an appointment. but at the moment it may as well be 6y. im 30 in january and i have been pg 10 times!

sorry, v self-pitying.

ronshar · 05/12/2007 12:04

Look at it from a different direction lissie.
You have been pregnant once and have a very beautiful little boy to show for it.
You are not a failure because you have evidence to prove it.
However you have 'conceived' a further nine times. So again you know that you are obviously a super fertile female.

Channel your feelings towards LWH. Do not allow them to let you down like your local hospital did. Be strong, take all your research with you. They hate that, because it means they cant fob you off.
Chin up love it will all work out soon. maybe we will be there together. I would love that. Couple of nutters together.

ronshar · 05/12/2007 12:04

By the way I am 33. Almost over the hill

merrylissiemas · 05/12/2007 12:11

lol, im ok really just a bit wallowy iykwim.

have you had any joy wioth yor doc?

ronshar · 05/12/2007 12:14

I am mostly lucky with my GPs. When I went into surgery in Oct the GP I saw was fab. And she phoned me at home at the end of the week to see how I was. However there is no follow up for me because I am not crap enough yet, only 2 mc's.
My surgery has about 8 GP's. Great if you dont like one.

merrylissiemas · 05/12/2007 12:16

lol our new surgery's like that. can you not go and ask about preliminary bloods? you have been ttc for a while...

ronshar · 05/12/2007 12:28

I hadnt really thought about it to be honest. I had my coil taken out last Oct 2006, I had a feeling I may be BFP last Dec but then got AF so May have been a chemical!!
So really I have only been trying for 14 months and had 2 confirmed BFPs which ended in MC.
Would they be interested in that?? Or what could they do?
I am going to ask next week if my increase in allergy symptoms may be affecting my ability to carry. They may laugh, we shall see.

merrylissiemas · 05/12/2007 12:30

im pretty sure that if you have a child and have been ttc for 12m or more the will start preliminary tests. might be worth a shot!

ronshar · 05/12/2007 12:34

I might go and test the water then. It might just be because I am old am knackered

merrylissiemas · 05/12/2007 12:38

nah, youre not old!

merrylissiemas · 05/12/2007 12:39

and if you are knackered it'd be down to all the sex!