TTC after pregnancy loss thread 31 - baby penguins are coming!

[strawberrye]

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Welcome to the 🐧 huddle. This is a wonderful supportive group for anyone TTC after the loss of a pregnancy or baby. Together we can get through he rollercoaster of TTC and get our baby penguins xx

I'm 10dpo and the frer says no. Just wait AF now and try again.

OK my results are in from the Rmc they don't look good I'm so gutted

Hi @Lilimum7, sorry about the bfn, but 10dpo is still early. Are you still charting? How are your temps?

I've had a look at your results, your lh is only slightly low, as is your amh - did the letter explain everything and next steps? The prolactin is lower but I'm not sure how that affects things? It must be a shock to get your results but hopefully there is hope as none of the results are too far out of the normal range? 💜

@Lilimum7 sorry about the BFN but as Venus says 10dpo is still quite early.

Is there a specific result that you are worrying about? These look fine to me except the prolactin but I don't know much about that. I have to say my numbers look worse than this I think x

@Lilimum7 sorry you haven't had your bfp yet - although there's still time! And that your results have you worried. Do you have an appointment scheduled to talk through the results?

@Rumi1 hope you've recovered well after erpc, sorry it ended up such a rough ride. Hope you have a lovely time away, Cornwall is a place I always feel happier in!

@Avocuddles congratulations and hope your next 8 months is as uneventful as possible! X

Feeling a bit low here. Bleeding never built up to a proper af but spotting lasted a week and definitely a bfn when I tested yesterday just in case, so am still not entirely sure where I am in my cycle. Hoping it was just a very light AF and ovulation may be on the horizon in the next couple of weeks.

@VenusStarr @fnej01 @Noisysparrows

Thanks ladies bit I know I'm out really. Plus temps have been steadily dropping since 7dpo. I've tried researching the prolactin thing but no joy. No further appointments scheduled with rmc just his words " should I be lucky enough to get pregnant again, take asprin and progesterone and give my secretary a ring to arrange an appointment for a 7 week scan. Oh and if you miscarry we will send the products off to test so I'll need to have an erpc even if I bleed on my own". So yeah I'm in no man's land again. No reason all my babies died and no hope I'll get pregnant again successfully. Down isn't the word today. So I'm going to the beach to pig out on donuts and candyfloss. So much for all those rainbows as signs, I've lost all faith now. How can you hold on to your faith if the test is so hard it breaks you - that can't be right

I'm sorry you're feeling so down @Lilimum7 the rmc advice sounds unhelpful.

Have you been referred for fertility testing? Or would you consider that? It might help to talk to a specialist. What has your dh said? Was he tested through the rmc too?

Be kind to yourself ❤️ Xx

@Lilimum7 really sorry your feeling so down. Definitely enjoy your day the donuts sound amazing.

Have you thought about going to the Coventry clinic and getting uNK cells tested? It's a biopsy and a little uncomfortable but might provide further insight. I booked this before knowing I had APS. They found my cells to be high consistently hence now on the steroids as well. You do have to pay but it was only £540. Other thing might be to consider Dr Shehata, lots of ladies seem to get good outcomes he was my plan C?

Unfortunately I think the whole go away get pregnant and see if you miscarry again then ERPC is a standard line. My RMC are exactly the same. Quite a daunting approach!

Hope this is helpful. Just wanted to share other ways forward I found helpful x

@Lilimum7 agree with the others, your levels don’t look too bad at all. I must say the language your consultant has used “if you’re lucky enough” is unhelpful and not what you need. And you have been pregnant 7 times, what a stupid thing to say. I also agree with the others to look at Dr Shehata and NK testing. Have they looked at your dh’s sperm? If you can afford to go private for a few tests I would do that. I also had NK tests on the nhs so I’m not sure why you were not offered this (although some consultants don’t seem to believe in it). I remember you saying your DH is catholic but I wonder if there is someone he can speak to at church regarding ivf? Maybe something less invasive like IUI might be an option.

I think @KnitKitty had raised prolactin and was treated for this (apologies if I’ve got this wrong). My understanding is that high prolactin can cause implantation issues but is treatable with medication. Did rmc not want to treat the prolactin or deem it necessary?

Donuts and beach sounds like an excellent idea x

@Mistymeow Thanks for the tag, yes I had high prolactin @Lilymum7 When they first tested it my levels were 1835 and a month later were 565. I was seen my an endocrinologist who said it might be causing implantation issues. And referred to my levels as 'borderline' and not something they would normally treat, but given my history of recurrent miscarriage suggested it would be something to try.
Unfortunately I wasn't seen by the same gynae for my second RMC appointment and he seemed completely unconcerned about the prolactin (wondered out loud why the first gynae had bothered requesting the test) and said there's no risk with recurrent miscarriage.
I think the jury is basically out on it at the moment.
All you read online is very contradictory. I'm not sure what it says about low prolactin. High prolactin gets in the way of what other hormones the pituitary glad produces, so maybe low prolactin has a similar affect?
Apparently the levels fluctuate a lot during your cycle and things like momentary stresses can have a massive impact on the levels (I was told that the stress of having the blood test could raise the levels, or even my nipples brushing against something might have an affect). They usually like to do repeat bloods a few times to check the levels again, and might ask you to have the blood test at a certain time of your cycle. It could be that when you had these bloods taken you had a momentary dip (and it doesn't look like too dramatic a dip either...).
The endocrinologist did give me medication for it to take until my next BFP. I actually only took it for 2 weeks in the end... I think I started it just before I ovulated. No idea if it helped or not; but I'm guessing it couldn't have really kicked in properly by the time I caught.
I would ask to be referred to an endocrinologist and ask for a repeat blood test for the prolactin so that the endocrinologist has two readings to consider. (Or ask for another BT and if the levels are still not above 100, then ask for the referral).
I was also prescribed progesterone pessaries to take as soon as BFP; and I have a gut feeling that for me, this is the thing which made the big difference with my current pregnancy (as well as months of acupuncture). With all of my previous pregnancies I had bleeding from either implantation or AF-due date. My current pregnancy is the first one I've had (out of 5) where I've had no bleeding at all. (I'm 16 weeks now and been told I can come off the pessaries).
You have been able to get pregnant fairly easily over the last year+, so hopefully taking progesterone is all you need for a successful pregnancy next time round. I am confident it's going to happen for you.
And I'm really sorry your gynae was so insensitive. It boggles my mind how tactless a lot of doctors are.
Sending hugs.

Hi everyone, long time no see, hope you're well well 💕

I haven't been on this board for a while as I took a break from ttc to recover physically and emotionally from my second mmc in March. We started trying again last month, and this month I had a funny feeling I was pregnant so took a frer and got a bfp. Obviously, thrilled to have another chance but very tentative/nervous, especially as my period isn't due until Friday.

I wonder if you could advise. I'm on the waiting list for recurrent miscarriage investigations as I've had two full mmc (one was twins) and two chemicals. What happens now? Would I get extra scans due to my history of missed miscarriage? Should I get in touch with someone now, rather than waiting until the 12 week scan? I know some of you have been through similar circumstances - any advice would be appreciated x

Hi @Dimblebimble, congratulations. I've had one mmc and am currently 5+6 with my second pregnancy. I was told by my epu I could call them when I next got a bfp and they'd see me. I called when I was 4 weeks and they asked me to call back at 6 weeks, which is tomorrow. So hoping to have an early scan this week. They said they would definitely see me and were really lovely and reassuring.

If your epu doesn't do self referrals can you ask your GP to refer you?

I've seen the GP to get my pregnancy on record (just in case we end up needing rmc) and he advised me to have the scan and then book in with a midwife xx

@Dimblebimble congratulations on the BFP wishing you a happy and healthy 9 months!

Agree with @VenusStarr re contacting EPU.

Also just so you know there is a new grads thread for people from this thread now pregnant which you might want to join when you are ready. There's lots of support there as early pregnancy after loss is an anxious time. I will try and post the link x

The Graduates of TTC after pregnancy loss thread #3 🐧🐧The Penguin Huddle 🐧🐧 www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/3660600-The-Graduates-of-TTC-after-pregnancy-loss-thread-3-The-Penguin-Huddle

Thanks @fnej01 and @VenusStarr, I will try and contact someone once I'm a little further along. I've had a bit of a nightmare tbh, I've been on the waiting list for recurrent miscarriage investigations and also waiting for the results of some tests on the 'pregnancy remains' since March, and when I chased it up with the GP who rang the epu for me a couple of weeks ago they told me I wasn't showing on the system, hence I hadn't heard anything 😬 The EPU doesn't have a phone number advertised which is annoying! I have to go through the GP, and they have a one month wait for appointments 🙈

Thanks for the link @fnej01 - I think I'll wait until I'm at least past my period due date before I hop on over, but I might lurk for now. Such a good idea to have a separate thread! With my second pregnancy, after my first mc, I joined the normal pregnancy threads and I found it really hard as many of the posters hadn't mc'd and I didn't want to share my worries and make them anxious!

Good luck for your scan @VenusStarr!

Hi ladies

I'm back from holiday and have been catching up on the thread.. so much happiness and heartache these last couple weeks. I'm praying for us all 🙏🏻 🌈

After our second mc at the start of July, we took a months break of ttc, went on holiday, had fun (lots of cocktails) and relaxed. Just what we needed.
Fertile week was this week so we DTD and now it's the dreaded TWW lol.

Fingers crossed for us all ladies. Hoping you all had a lovely weekend xxx

Dimblebimble my midwife booked me in for early scans with my history. I made contact with the midwife service at 5 weeks pregnant, she saw me at 6 weeks pregnant and booked me in that same week. Tentative congratulations too

@TwittleBee Are you actively TTC or do you need to wait as you had a CS?

@Lilimum7 I’m sorry you are feeling so down. I don’t know enough to advise but some of the other l lovely ladies on here are doing so and I just hope this phase passes. Sometimes it can feel like there is no hope but I believe there is. It sounds like your doctor wasn’t very helpful in how he phrased things.

Sorry you are feeling down @Noisysparrows

Congratulations @Dimblebimble

I’m feeling a bit fed up. Think I mentioned before that DH has had an issue lately which can make dtd difficult. He has an appointment coming up but I have had flashing smileys for 3 days and we haven’t managed to dtd. I’m trying to tell myself it’s one cycle (hopefully) and isn’t the end of the world but it being 6 months since our daughter then a cp last month, TTC gives me a little bit of hope each cycle and something to look forward to. Sorry for being a negative nellie.

I’m on CD13 which is around the time I usually ovulate these days. Thought it might be a bit later following cp. I suppose it still could be as I could get a few more days of flashing smileys yet before peak...

ReeReeR yeah have to wait. Originally was told 12 months at the hospital and the MW there tried talking to me about contraception only 24 hours after my son was born! Then i was told 18 months by a MW on a home visit. Then it changed down to 6 months by a doctor and the latest now is actually only 3 months if I'm happy to have an ELCS rather than a VBAC. So we can start TTC end of September! I think the plan is we will wait until November though before properly TTC.

Btw, don't think you're being a negative nellie at all by saying how TTC gives you hope each month... can totally understand even missing 1 cycle is disheartening.

I'm certainly ovulating late this month CD18 here and usually ovulate CD16

Hello - bit of a lurker but thought I should say hi. Been struggling a lot post miscarriage so it's good to find solidarity.

35, had a MMC at 10 weeks in July. TTC for 7 cycles prior to the MMC. I feel emotionally exhausted by 2019 already, huge admiration goes out to all of you on this group who've gone through this multiple times. Have a 2 and a half year old boy so very lucky in that.

Started TTC again straight after miscarriage ended. Had a scan on Friday where I was told my lining was thin so AF would probably be 1-2 weeks late, but then it started the next day (5 days early by my normal cycle)! Totally confused. Anyway, I hope the cycle gets back on track as it would be nice to know where I stand, even if nothing happens...

@TwittleBee It is disheartening to miss a cycle but similar to you having to wait in a way and I’m trying to see the long game

Hi @rosamundos Sorry you find yourself here. I think cycles can be a bit messed up after pregnancy

@rosamundos welcome in, sorry you find yourself here. I also had a MMC in July at around 11 weeks, and straight back on the TTC train as well. No joy last cycle (possible CP?) so into second cycle, glad to have someone to keep me company! I hope we're both winging our way to the grad thread soon.

@ReeReeR I totally get it. At least if you can get a well timed shag in you can live in hope for half the month! I hope whatever it is is sorted ASAP and you can get back on the horse (so to speak )

@Dimblebimble congrats on the bfp, and fingers crossed for you @FirstTimeMama91.

Thanks @Noisysparrows you too xx

I forgot how agonising the TWW is 🙈 I'm only 3/4 dpo longggg way to go! What's the earliest anyone has got a bfp? My last 2 were around 11/12 dpo

That is exactly it Noisysparrows the "well timed shag" and living in hope!

Super fingers crossed FirstTimeMama91 - and 7dpo with a FRER is earliest I have got a positive, although it was v v faint!

So looks like I shall be making a negligence claim in regards to my baby's death - dont want to go into too much detail but have a solicitor on board now. Hoping that by taking this to the courts, the hospital will be forced to make changes to avoid this happening again?