TTC after pregnancy loss thread 31 - baby penguins are coming!

[strawberrye]

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Welcome to the 🐧 huddle. This is a wonderful supportive group for anyone TTC after the loss of a pregnancy or baby. Together we can get through he rollercoaster of TTC and get our baby penguins xx

@BFC81 don’t get down, I got pregnant at 39 and again at 41 in March (although had a miscarriage at 9 weeks that sounded exactly like yours - did it naturally but a tiny fragment remained so needed d and c.) so your hormones are probably just trying to get back to normal.

Have you thought about asking your gp to run some tests?

@Squiff70 thank you. You’re right about not getting too caught up in ttc. It’s easier said than done! I’m generally terrible at relaxing even under normal circumstances so might take a look at reflexology/massage etc more as a way of taking some time out. Congratulations on your pregnancy x

@JuniperAndRose Thank you so much. I just cannot bring myself to get excited at this stage and don't know what, if any point, I will since I lost my twin son and daughter at 19 weeks this January and have had two chemicals since. I'l be 5 weeks tomorrow so very very early on and I am not going to get complacent.

@ReeReeR I'm sorry things are so bloody tough for you right now. Sometimes I think we put all our focus and attention on that BFP and (for me) I buried my head in the sand over my babies. For a time it's all I focussed on (getting pregnant again) and I began to wonder if this was my way of coping with my children's deaths. By no means am I suggesting that's wht you're doing too - I'm just telling my own personal story. Only when I shifted that focus did I get pregnant again. I promise you I understand how hard it is to get AF every month (I'm 37 now and time is running out for me). You have plenty of time to get pregnant and have a healthy baby - and I believe that with every fibre of my being you WILL have another baby, and soon. Try though not to obsess (and I mean that in the most gentle of ways because I have a tiny/vague idea what you're going through) because you're putting in ALL this effort and potentially having your efforts hampered by stress. I hope that comes across in the way it was intended xx

@BFC81 Hello and welcome. I'm sorry to 'meet' you under such sad corcumstances and I'm truly sorry for everything you've been through. I understand what you mean about being 38 (I'm 37) and worrying bout fertility.

@Russkispy Please let us know how you are when you're ready. Whatever the outcome of your scan today we'll be here for you.

@Avocuddles sorry to hear about the long cycles, they are very depressing. My gp put it down to stress which I denied but in hindsight he was probably right. I hope you have a supportive gp.
@ReeReeR the funeral sounds very difficult. I hope you’re feeling a bit better. I’m also 6 dpo but I don’t feel any different, just the usual pms cramps.
@Pop1234 good to get feedback on Dr Gordon, thanks. Your plan sound very sensible. I’m not on any of those drugs, just the additional vitamins and aspirin. I assume because I haven’t been diagnosed with anything yet. I think he will discuss my results at the next appointment but I reckon if there is anything flagged they would call me (I hope so!) he didn’t say not to ttc in the meantime so we are just continuing. I hope you don’t end up with lupus but you’re completely right- we are in good hands.

@ReeReeR yes they've been between 35 and 62 days in the 15 months since I stopped taking the mini pill! I had a referral prior to my pregnancy, I'm hoping the fact that I did get pregnant doesn't 'count against me' in terms of resetting the clock. As I'm over 35 I'm hoping that they'll be sympathetic but we'll see.

It's not surprising that the stress is impacting on your relationship, you've both been through so much. Glad you enjoyed Zumba. I need to get back to exercising, I used to do Zumba regularly but it fell by the wayside when we moved house / started TTC last year.

Thanks @Squiff70 I think we all obsess about TTC from time to time (I certainly do!) but that’s not where I am right now tbh. My talk of OPKs and SMEP has mostly just been just in “conversation” with others. I have had a lot on my mind the past few days (relative funeral, work, tension with DH) and feel a bit down today but so much about TTC. Im in the 2WW now. We’ll see what happens. I hope you’re okay. It’s completely understandable that you will worry past the usual 12 week risk zone which is when people are supposed to be able to relax

And sorry seem to have missed a page on here

@JuniperAndRose (I have NC) No worries. It was Feb when I lost my daughter so close in time to you and Bluebelltulip I was thinking of using my KIT days to almost go back part time. So maybe doing three days a week for a few weeks, if they let me. I don’t think I’ll ever feel ready to go back so I just need to do it and I think I’ll feel better if I just set a date. How long have you been back?

I haven’t found I’ve ovulated early specifically but my cycle is still irregular since having my baby girl. I think it takes time for our bodies to get recover from everything.

Thank you lovely ladies! Had no bleeding during the night and only tiny brown discharge this morning and nothing since. As I was in the waiting room I felt like nausea was hitting me. The scan went well. But am around 5 weeks, he said. Not 6w4d. After a miscarriage if you don’t have 3 full cycles, it’s hard to determine weeks of early pregnancy. But, sac is present and yolk is present too! No heartbeat as it’s too early. Back to see him on 7/08 when I’m 7 weeks. Blessing was more likely caused by placenta as he could see something small around the sac. Very relieved but still early days! Spoke to my fertility doc and told me to take extra progesterone in the morning and continue with the evening intake. Thank you for all your support! It means a lot!

@Russkispy glad it went ok. It's not at all unusual for dates to be out, and as you say even more so after a MC when your body is all over the place. Hope you have a relaxing next couple of weeks before your next scan

Hi, I'm more of a lurker than poster on here, congrats to those with BFPs!!

Has anyone on here reserves positive on an ANA test? I went to the Dr after my miscarriage in April and asked for some blood tests to check for lupus (as my mum has it) and I know there is a link to miscarriage. I suffer Raynaud's disease as well, so I think he humoured me in getting them done. I phoned a few weeks ago and was told all was ok, but got a letter today saying I need to see the gp. I've phoned and booked an appt - can't get one for a month! But the said my nuclear auto antibody test came back positive. I think this is the one that could indicate lupus.

Just wondered if anyone had been in the same boat as I'm a bit worried and can't see him earlier. I'm still TTC and don't know if there's something I should do if I see a BFP before I see him

Glad today went well for you @Russkispy

I'm not sure sorry @Kayjay2018 but I hope someone will be song soon who is more helpful!

Hi @Kayjay2018

I have been diagnosed with aps as I tested persistently high for Beta 2 Glycoprotein antibodies. This isn't lupus, but I have suffered for a number of years with Reynards. They have prescribed heparin and aspirin while pregnant for this.
I don't think this is exactly the same as what you've tested for but might be similar. Is the appt with consultant or gp?

@Russkispy glad the scan went ok. Fingers crossed for a healthy pregnancy.

@ReeReeR thanks. So sorry to hear what a tough week you have had.

@Mistymeow glad your RMC went well. How was the interview? I completely understand your quandary. I recently have started working on a project with EPAU about the services they deliver. I ultimately had to think long and hard about whether it was too close to home, but decided that it was the opportunity to make change.

Sorry to everyone I have missed it's too hot to think. I hope you are all staying well and drinking lots in this heat x

@Russkispy I'm so glad to hear things are okay. Hoping you see that tiny flicker at your next scan x

@ineedanotherholiday thank you

@fnej01 thank you for responding. This appointment is with my gp so hoping he will be proactive. I'm not sure if that means more tests or a referral somewhere? I'm 38 and hubby is early 50s so had thought the MC was probably a chromosome issue, now I'm not so sure. I asked for the tests really to rule it out, I didn't expect an issue

@ReeReeR oh that must have been so tough for you. I can totally understand why you'd be emotional. Give yourself permission to feel everything you do, it's normal and natural. You've been through hell with your loss. Sending you lots of virtual hugs

@Kayjay2018 in your shoes I would maybe push for a referral. I am 38 DH 47 and we had 3 MC and a CP last year before diagnosis. I was convinced it might just be old age, but it seems not.

@fnej01 I think they may want to refer on the blood test front, not fertility wise. DH isn't up for testing etc is more of the opinion that what will be will be. My mind is already running that it's possible my body actually saw the baby as an intruder and got rid of it. We had had spotting but seen a heartbeat at a scan. It could of course just be a coincidence.

I'm sure there is a treatment available, so will see what happens. I will chase if I'm lucky enough to get a BFP before the appt.

Sounds like a plan @Kayjay2018 wishing you the very best of luck getting BFP soon. X

@fnej01 I was going to say the same back to you, but just seen your news from earlier in the week. I really hope you have a healthy 9 months!

@Kayjay2018 thank you. We have a very long way to go yet, but trying to be positive.🤞

@Kayjay2018 I don’t know anything about lupus but I am hypothyroid, which means my thyroid gland is sluggish and I take pills to help this. Hypothyroid and lupus are both autoimmune diseases and sometimes food can be a trigger for it. I was allergic to gluten and have recently cut out dairy whilst TTC.

@ReeReeR @Navy123 I’m 5dpo and keep symptom spotting!! I have been feeling jolts / pains in my left and right side but this is probably just normal and I usually just ignore it! But can’t help hoping... Anything going on with you guys?

Thanks @fnej01 and @InDreamland

@Internetaddictgirl @Navy123 I’m about 7 DPO and haven’t noticed anything unusual really. I have had an odd couple of weeks in that I’ve been busy and not sleeping well so I feel tired and have bad skin but that’s probably due to lack of sleep. I think we do notice things more in the 2WW but I know lots of people didn’t have symptoms and got their BFP. Fingers crossed for us🤞

Wow I have got behind on this thread. Im blaming it on a busy weekend followed by minor heatstroke!

@Russkispy glad you had a good scan, fingers crossed everything settles down for you!

@ReeReeR sorry it's been a tough few days for you guys - have you had a chance to talk properly now?

Glad to see that others get grumpy around ov and interesting @Mistymeow what you said about backache - mines been awful.

I think I am 6-8 dpo, no symptoms yet but this heat is masking anything anyway! How is everyone finding it? I usually love this kind of heat but I over did it on Tuesday and haven't recovered yet. Going to spend the day somewhere with a pool today thank goodness!

Having a really tough day. This morning one of my colleagues who is a few years younger than me pulled me aside and told me that she is ten weeks pregnant with her second child. She knows about my MC and fertility problems so wanted to tell me before it became widely known. She had a scan yesterday which revealed that she had initially been expected twins, but unfortunately only one has survived, so she's having a tough time of things but I still feel really upset. There are 3 managers in the team and the fact that's now expecting makes me feel as if I should put my own pregnancy dreams on hold for the sake of the business. I thought I was handling things ok but feel distraught today