35+ TTC#1 Thread 6

[BambiOnIce80]

Spring is in the air and it's time for a new thread!

Basically: a wonderful bunch of ladies supporting each other through the TTC journey when trying for a first baby after 35.

Here's hoping we get some spring BFP luck for all of us!! 🍀🐣🍀🐣

Hi lovelies. Sorry I've been quiet -lots going on.

I'm still plugging through the podcasts/ROTs too - some really interesting stories and experiences, some heartbreaking too.

I've been struggling a bit getting my anxiety under control re:ivf. Got my first scan to get out my middles on Thursday and I'm bricking it. I hate anything medical anyway, so add to that the fact it's internal too which I find really traumatic (only internal stuff I've ever had done was as a result of mc's-never had smears etc) and the fact it's likely to be a male doctor doing it-well I'm freaking out. Oh has his SA test same day then it's back to the consultant the following weds.

And is it only me that finds it weird that gynae/fertility/obstetric doctors are predominately male? You don't get a similar pattern with prostate docs being predominately female?! Odd.

Also had some worrying news-ma has to have an op a week today. She's playing it down but it's come about very suddenly (within about a month). She says it's polyp removal and as she nearly died during a general last time she had an op this is being done with epidural. She's being very cagey...my gut says she's on the cancer referral pathway 😢

@CNizzle deffo worth getting your thyroid checked - I know from my miscarriage research there's optimal TSH levels for TTC, and if it's too high it can be a factor in MC. My gp was very happy to test me so I'm sure it shouldn't be an issue to get the test.

Sorry not to reply to everyone, brain a bit all over the place...

Hope it's ok for me to join in here!

I'm 36, TTC#1, cycle 1. I'm currently on day 8 of Clearblue flashing smileys, going quietly mad waiting for a static smiley! Don't think my lack of patience is going to serve me well in this process...

Morning Ladies 🤗. @CNizzle I can't comment on the thyroid issue but for me weight based training is the best way to lose weight. Spinning is great but not as effective

@Kescilly Best of luck to you on your D day. Can't believe how soon this is!

@Laney79 I hope your mum gets better and it is only a cyst but I can see why you are worried 💐

@BambiOnIce80 hope you are having a ball 💑

@beverlymarsh I hate being baby bombed (like we all do) sometimes I practice my congratulations in front of the mirror at home before I go out, it's my survival mechanism.

@VenusStarr do you opk every day? I'm just asking because I've finally got my period (only 111 days cycle 🙄) and I don't know what to do now. Opk every day or cross my fingers hoping it will be normal again? Either way I'm well chuffed 😊⭐️

Hi @Laney79 good to hear from you. I'm sorry you've got lots of worries at the moment. Hope everything goes well with your mom, it's hard not to let your mind go into overdrive.
Sounds like things are definitely moving forward. Try to take each day as it comes. Honestly, the transvaginal scans have been OK (much more comfortable than smears or the internal I had a few weeks ago). The worst bit is going in (they do offer to let you do that if you want) and taking it out feels a bit odd. Zero pain but a weird sensation when they move around. I haven't tried it but there is a mindful ivf app, might be worth looking up?

Welcome @MindyStClair and @Lammoshay this is a great group :)

Eek @Kescilly you have a date! You're on the final stretch now. Dh is OK, like me really, OK sometimes. He's in a bit of a rut as some other things have changed with work and his hobby so think in general he's feeling out of control with things.

I'm not feeling physically well. Woke up this morning and I felt dizzy when I was lying down. Have got up and the feeling hasn't passed. I'm unsure if it's a virus but I feel strange. My mind has jumped to its something to do with the miscarriage and I've got an infection or retained something 🙄 so I'm booked in with the GP. Thanks anxiety 😔

By my normal cycle I would have been due on yesterday but no signs. I did have ewcm around my usual time but also some last week so no idea when to expect af. Feel like I'm on edge just waiting, waiting, waiting. It's been like this since March when I first had the bleed. Ugh. Sorry.

The sun is shining and I don't feel able to drive so am going to walk to the doctors. Have a good day everyone. X

Cross Post @QuantumGirl, yay for your period! Cd1 :) I don't use opks any more but I generally started about cd8 and used the cheap ones so tested around 2pm and 6pm as my surge is short. Don't use fmu for the cheap ones. You can get around 50 on amazon for a decent price. I had one cycle where I got a positive on the Wednesday but didn't ovulate until the Sunday but mostly you'll ovulate within 12-36 hours of a positive test. It's probably a good idea to use them this cycle just to get an idea of when you ovulate but I didn't find they helped my stress levels using them every cycle. X

Hello all. Sorry for the radio silence. I have been so busy. But back to work and settling into routine again. There was so much to catch up on 😊

@Laney79 I’m sorry that your worried about your mum. I hope it all goes well and it’s nothing to serious. You are right about men always being the ones at the uhuhu ‘business’ end. Mind you, I had an internal a couple of weeks ago (by a man) and it was actually ok. He only looked at the screen. There is usually a women in the room too.

Congrats on af showing up @QuantumGirl
I never know when af is going to arrive. So I use IC OPK every day after Cd10ish (I have long cycles).

I had a flashing bloody smiley for 14 days @MindyStClair try to stick with it. Mind you it put me off enough to not buy CB again. Lol.

Hi @BambiOnIce80 I hope you are having a fab Birthday week, you bloody well deserve it. Get that Gin down you ladies 🍹. Have an amazing Birthday xxx

I am doing ok. CD28 Not feeling as if iv got a lot of chance with ttc at all though. It’s just the same symptoms different cycle. My body makes sure I don’t get my hopes up (good thing I suppose). I’m not sure I even Ov this month as I didn’t have 2 solid solid lines at any point, although they were quite dark around CD17 and I did have a few symptoms. But who bloody knows. It’s all a head 🤬.

Hello to all the newbies 😊. This is a lovely thread. ❤️

Sorry I haven’t mentioned everyone but sending love and luck to you all.

Bad news for us today. Had our second scan and it showed no heartbeat. All stopped a day after our first early scan at 7w3d. Absolutely devastated. Having a surgical procedure to remove it all tomorrow morning. We both cried out eyes out. And now just getting loads of cuddles from our little DD who seems more and more precious in these shitty situations like this. It reminds me how lucky we were a couple of years ago and fell pregnant first time with IUI. She's so special I can't describe it.

I've replied on the other thread @Russkispy but I am so sorry to hear your news 💔 sending you love. It's such a shit time. I don't have any words, just sending hugs xx

@Russkispy, just to mirror what @VenusStarr said, There no words... hold your loved ones tight, sending love xxx

I'm so sorry @Russkispy

So sorry to hear that @Russkispy Sending love

Hi all

Haven’t RTFT yet but hope you don’t mind me joining you. I know some of you from another thread.

I’m 35 and TTC first cycle.

Technically TTC #2 as I had a baby girl in February who was still born at full term but I don’t have any living children

@Russkispy I replied on the other thread too and so sorry you are going through this. It’s heartbreaking news

@Laney79 I’ve had an internal scan before (suspected PCOS a few years ago but it wasn’t that) and it really wasn’t that bad. It’s one of those things where the idea is probably worse than the reality. Same with smears but I know they might not help if you have anything like that. Can you book something nice after like a massage or a manicure or go out for dinner so you have something nice to look forward to that day?

Hi @AliceRR welcome, it's a lovely bunch of ladies here. So sorry for your recent loss, wishing you all the best ttc x

@Russkispy oh no, sending you 💐

Hello to the newbies 👋 I second what the others have said already, this is a lovely group of ladies (some of us have continued to chat on an ante-natal group too so we don't spam everyone with pregnancy related chat, but we do check back to see how everyone is getting on).

@Russkispy 😢💔
@AliceRR welcome to the thread

I’m so sorry @Russkispy that’s heartbreaking. It’s just so cruel 💐 sending you cyber hugs. xxx

Hello @AliceRR 😊

Thanks ladies for the support. Welcome @AliceRR These ladies are just fab.

@Russkispy I did respond on the other thread, but I just wanted to say how sorry I am. I really hope today went as smoothly as possible for you. Xxx

As for me- Spent the day so wound up I was like a coiled spring. OH sperm analysis test went ok (although he did say the pot was a bit small so he was worried about not catching all the little guys if his aim was off! Thankfully it wasn't 😜)

I was absolutely petrified about my internal scan. I've had plenty before (6 in fact) due to losing my bean and bow last year, but this was a different place, different people who don't know me or my anxiety. I was physically shaking in the waiting room.

Sadly it was a bloke (older fella too) which made me even more nervous. The nurse was kind though. Had to ask them if we could not use the stirrups. For me stirrups just make me feel so vulnerable and I never had to have them for any of my other scans. Thankfully they said ok (but she had to ask as the dr "usually likes to use them"). I was gripping OH hand so tightly. Due to my anxiety it was a bit sore going in, and I really don't like the poking around feeling but I managed to stay put. He called out lots of measurements to the nurse of my uterus, ovaries cervix etc, but didn't really speak to me and I think if I hadn't said anything to him at the end that would've been that!! However I did ask-as anxious and desperate to go home as I was I wanted to know if everything was ok!!! He didn't say a lot, no cysts or fibroids, could tell I'd ovulated but without the blood results that was it.

I did manage to remember some of the numbers/info he was giving to the nurse though...I think my Antral follicle counts were 3 on the right 2 on the left, plus a Corpeus lutem on the left, and my endometrium was 8mm. From dr google the follicle count is low, verging on too low... so I have to hope my AMH is better otherwise I'm concerned they won't do ivf. Not sure if the lining is thick enough either at 8mm. Due AF sat/sun so not sure if it would normally be thicker. He did say he couldn't tell if I was pregnant or not yet. So I think I'll break out a frer first thing just in case.

It's been a hell of a day! 12 hours later I'm finally home! Went to EPu at 8, 6 hours later they told me I might not even have the procedure done today as theaters/surgeons are busy! By then I haven't had a drink or food since yesterday 4-6pm as I was puking all evening! I screamed at them! I just couldn't go home after all these hours and mental and physical exhaustion! Finally at 4pm they took me to theatre! And finally discharge me at 8pm! I'm so exhausted and frustrated and in bits about the whole situation, words just failing me. But it's done now. Time to move on. And have my ducks in a row about the next plan of action. Have already some thoughts which need to process/digest and then act once ready. But this is not over yet! Thank you for all your lovely messages! Means a lot! 🤗🤗

Welcome @AliceRR :) the thread seems quiet at the moment but everyone is so lovely and supportive.

Sorry you had an awful day yesterday @Russkispy. I wonder if working on places like epu the staff become desensitised. Glad you were discharged and didn't have to stay in. How you feeling today?

How are you @Carley32?

Good to see you @Weathergirl1 and @Pinkywoo how are you getting on?

How's things with you @CNizzle @PixieN @QuantumGirl?

I'm cd3, found my first af since the miscarriage tough but feeling a bit more hopeful today about everything. Its a brand new cycle so we're in with a chance. Have started the ubiquinol and started reading it starts with the egg. Off put for dinner with dh to celebrate 4 years since our first date with a rare steak and a glass of red wine :)

Hello all. Happy Friday 😊.

The thread is getting a little quiet isn’t it. How is everyone doing/feeling?
Any AF’s or FW’s coming up?

I’m ok thanks @Laney79. I’m glad you are feeling a little better. Dinner sounds lovely 😊 rare steak isn’t for me though 🙂.
Oo a few people have mentioned the book. How is it, any hints and tips you are are able to share?

Well I had an untrasound on Wednesday (because of the pain I was getting around my side and lower back) nothing flagged up but the lady who scanned me did mention looking at endometriosis because I have a few symptoms (apart from the heavy and painful periods). She also said to nag nag nag my doctors for more bloods so Ov can be confirmed on more than 1 occasion. So i’ll Ring today.
The good news.... I have finally had a ‘normal’ cycle. 29 days! Yesterday was much more flow (tmi) than I’m used to but I did have a serious stomachache where I needed a hot bath to ease it. Is this good or bad news after the mention of endometriosis? Would love to hear some of your thoughts! X

@VenusStarr glad you are doing a bit better-dinner sounds great!

@Carley32 cant help with the endo stuff, but yey for a normal-ish cycle! Glad your scan didn't reveal anything. Deffo worth pestering for bloods. If they won't do it for you, and you can afford it, medichecks offer a progesterone test for £39 I think-and you can sometimes get offers voucher codes if you google too!

Well. News from me. AF is due over the weekend and I was feeling distinctly AF-ish with some crampy feelings over the past couple of days. As I said the dr who did my scan yesterday said he couldn't tell if I was pregnant or not... Well it turns out I am! Frer this morning at 12dpo (my usual luteal phase is 12/13 days). I'm petrified but over the moon. I just hope that this one is healthy and sticky. OH says third time lucky...I hope he's right. It will mean no nhs ivf for us as if this one doesn't work out I'll be too old. So I'm really hoping this little one is THE one.

I'm so sorry @Russkispy it sounds like such an ordeal and the last thing you needed. My thoughts are with you during your recovery! Xx

Omg @Laney79 I'm so pleased for you after everything you've been through. I woke up feeling pretty down today. We have the GP later for DHs sperm analysis results and I'm going to push again for more tests for me so dreading it. Your news really brought a smile to my face and gave me hope again. Third time lucky! Xx

Thanks everyone - actually quite a few of us from the other thread! 😬

@Laney79 oh blimey, tentative congratulations! 🤞this is third time lucky after all you've been though.

@Carley32 I think it's been quite because @Bambionice80 has been quiet - she's the backbone of this thread 😀. Yay for a normal cycle - hopefully this means your body is getting itself back in order.

@VenusStarr enjoy your steak this evening 😁. I'm bumbling along here - still feeling quite weak and tired and my mood is a bit low as I'm not managing to do enough exercise to get my usual endorphin dose. We had about of a stressful weekend last week as I discovered carpet moths in our wool carpets 😭😭😭. We think we've caught them early but the thought of having to replace carpets was not nice & poor DH had to put down all the treatment on his own as we thought it wasn't worth risking me being exposed to the insecticides (Natural Cycles also must have been a bit psychic as I got a message on Tuesday morning telling me to avoid cigarette smoke, traffic fumes and chemicals!) - eek!

Have a lovely weekend everyone (despite the weather forecast being rubbish compared to 2 weeks ago) and good luck to those entering FW!