35+ TTC#1 Thread 5

[BambiOnIce80]

New Year, new thread! 🍾🥂

Basically: a wonderful bunch of ladies supporting each other through the TTC journey when trying for a first baby after 35.

Here's hoping 2019 brings some BFP luck to us all!! 🍀🤞🏻🍀🤞🏻

Good luck those testing this morning. It seems like a good month for results so I've got everything crossed for you!!

Just tested, negative 😔

So sorry @QuantumGirl 😔💐

Oh crap, sorry @QuantumGirl I really thought it was your month

Thank you ladies. I just don't know what to do next. CD37 today. I've booked a GP appointment for tomorrow but doubt they will offer me a blood test. Is it worth paying for a private scan?

Hmm, @QuantumGirl, what do you want to find out? Do you want to know if there was any possibility you were pregnant? I guess a blood test ASAP would be the only way to know that. A scan wouldn't tell you much, I think, just what your lining looks like and whether you might have ovulated or not? You might be able to persuade your GP to give you a blood test, but mine would tell me to go away and keep trying :(

Remind me how long your cycles normally are @QuantumGirl? I've had maybe 7 annovulatory cycles in my time, but I very distinctly remember the first one (because I totally freaked out). I was 26 at the time and very much not TTC. My normal cycles were 32 days then and AF was 6 days late with a BFN (which I was soooooo relieved to see... Oh, how times have changed 🙄), so I was really confused where my totally regular period had gone. Went to see my then GP and she couldn't have rolled her eyes far enough back in her head as I filled her in on my concerns. She told me it was probably an annovulatory cycle, it was normal to get them once or twice a year and to go away and not come back unless it still hadn't turned up in another 2 weeks. I left balling my eyes out, but AF did indeed turn up a few days later. Had that happen maybe once a year afterwards up to 2013 - haven't had one since, so I'm probably due one 😒 I'm not saying you're definitely having an annovulatory cycle at all - just with you saying you weren't sure you ovulated this month and this is what happened to me when I went to the doc about a late AF and BFN. Maybe your doc will have a better bedside manner than the mean one I got 🍀

On the blood test front, the blood pregnancy test is looking for serum hCG (the same as the FRER in your wee) so if the FRER is a BFN then it's unlikely to show in the blood (but not impossible). Our reference range at work is

Sorry @QuantumGirl, but you're not out until the red lady sings.

I think I might be going crazy as DP can't see anything on these tests, anyone else see anything?

I'm sorry @QuantumGirl, a BFN is always such a blow. I hope that you get some answers soon.

We were supposed to be off to Bath tomorrow but we're going to have to cancel (and lose out on all our £££). My husband went and got a cold and passed it on to me. And I really struggle with being ill even when I'm not pregnant, so there's no way we can go.

I know it's minor in the grand scheme of things, but I'm devastated. We aren't going to have any childcare here so this was pretty much our last chance to do something like this.

I can see something @Pinkywoo, but I can't tell if there's any colour to it or not (I really am bad at 'line eyes' 👀!). Did the lines turn up within the 10 minutes? Either way, I think hCG is supposed to double every 48 hours or so, so hopefully all will become clear in the next few days 🤞🏻 🍀

Oh that totally sucks @Kescilly! 😢 Is there anyway they'd let you move your reservation to a bit later date?x

Thank you ladies for the commiserations 😌. I think all I want to find out is if I did get pregnant even for only a few hours, should I skip the fertility tests? @BambiOnIce80 my cycles are textbook 28 days although last month was 26 but I think was due to the unexplainable itchy rash I had in December. Thank you for the detailed explanation of HCG too. Like @79andnotout my GP will also most likely tell me to go home and wait. I just feel like I should do something other than wait but I think there is nothing to do. I'm clutching straws here.

@Pinkywoo I think I can see a line. It's as faint as mine was but do hope it will get stronger in a few days time.

@Kescilly That really is rubbish. As this Valentine's Day, can't they change your dates to a less busy time for the same price? Ask for the manager and if that doesn't work go to social media and play the 'nice but victim' customer. As you can tell I am one of 'those' customers but usually it works 😉

@BambiOnIce80 they did come up in the first 10 minutes, but I can't tell if they have colour either! I've used these tests before and never had any kind of line, I'm not good at waiting.

@Kescilly I'd definitely ask to speak to the manager about rescheduling, it never hurts to ask.

@QuantumGirl sorry about BFN. I'm kind of similar to you. CD32 today and still no AF and tested BFN this morning (started testing from Sunday!). Last night was feeling a bit sick and this morning passed. My doctor suggested a scan to check ovaries for cysts etc Booked for Friday unless AF arrives between now and then. and I received my IVF meds to start injections this week! I have no idea what's happening here! Last cycle I was only 26 days. I didn't use OV sticks so no idea when ovulated. It's a mystery!

Thanks ladies, I think I just needed to be a little self-pitying! We might be able to get back some of the cost if they can resell the rooms. It’s a B&B where they don’t allow kids under 12 so we really aren’t going to get another chance! I don’t suppose anyone is looking for somewhere to stay in Bath the next three days? 😁

@QuantumGirl I don’t think I’d skip the fertility tests since you haven’t had anything confirmed. I’m not sure a scan would show anything at this point, but I’m not very experienced in that area.

Speaking of scans, has anyone ever had one done privately for fertility? I’m not sure what all they look at, but when we went for an early pregnancy scan, I noticed they offered a fertility scan as well. Had I known, I might have considered doing something like that. Here’s the description:

[Scan Facility] is offering an ultrasound assessment to assist women undergoing fertility treatment allowing them to provide their chosen care facility either in the UK or abroad with the required information especially in cases when that care facility may not be close to their home/work.

An initial scan at the start of a fertility programme may require a more detailed review of the pelvic area including the shape, size and condition of the uterus (womb) the appearance and measurement of the endometrium (lining of the womb), assessment of both ovaries along with a follicle count/measurement and a general overview of the pelvic area/adnexa.

An endometrial thickness scan will usually involve 1-3 scans and varies from clinic to clinic but usually commences around day 7-9 of your cycle but the amount and timing will be confirmed by your chosen care facility. This scan measures the maximum diameter (in mm’s) of the endometrium.

This ultrasound examination needs to be accurate therefore is performed using a vaginal probe. The bladder will need to be empty during the procedure and the vast majority of women find this procedure completely pain free.

So sorry @QuantumGirl, our bodies really are frustrating and confusing on times aren't they? well AF still isn't here so maybe there's still a chance?

oh no that's shit @Kescilly. I hate being ill too. Can you not squeeze it in again in a few weeks?

@Pinkywoo I think I can see a very faint line. fingers crossed for you x

Sorry to hear that @QuantumGirl, frustrating for you to be in limbo. Do you track ovulation?

I can see faint lines on both @Pinkywoo but not sure if I can see pink yet. Fingers crossed!

Sorry you're poorly @Kescilly and can't go away. Have you cancelled yet? You might feel better and still be able to go?

Sorry about bfn @Russkispy

I've resisted calling the GP again @79andnotout, I get they're busy but to not even have a look at it. I'm going to get in for an on the day appointment on Friday. I'll make him do it!!

Feeling quite unwell today. Work is very busy and after Monday's drama I don't think I properly rested. Dh thinks I was in shock, full body aches yesterday, almost flu like and today I feel like my head is cotton wool, making mistakes, pounding head, not able to concentrate. Its horrible. Feel like I could sleep for a week but I know I can't. Have to keep plodding on 😔 am so slow am almost going backwards.

Hope everyone else is OK x

Thanks @Carley321 and @VenusStarr. Unfortunately I don't think we will get another chance at going. When I'm not pregnant, even a minor cold means I can't leave the house for at least two weeks. With less breathing capacity and not taking all my meds, I don't stand a chance.

We are having family visit in a few weeks, and I can't imagine I'll want to go anywhere after that. I already feel huge! Plus we can't waste any more of my husband's days off, we were on the fence about even spending a couple to go to Bath. Oh well. I just hope we can get some money back.

@VenusStarr I'm sorry you're feeling so rotten. That sounds like such a horrible feeling. I hope you can get some rest soon.

Oh no! Sorry about the BFN @QuantumGirl - and @pinkywoo I can also see faint lines hang on in there.

Feeling miserable myself today - I've had three days of a cold (had to discount my BBT this morning as it was silly high after a really bad night sleep). I can totally empathise @kescilly cold viruses hit me really badly too. It's like I'm some sort of snot generating machine as well as being wiped out... Have you tried nasal rinsing? Since I've been doing that when I get colds it's been a lot better (also had my sinus openings enlarged a bit which helps them drain better) and my OH saw a journal paper the other day that reported colds clearing on average 1.5 days quicker with saline nasal irrigation so there does seem to be something in it. It sounds really grim, but I find it a lot more pleasant than constant nose blowing.

💐💐 To everyone!

My dad swears by nasal cleansing. He gets bad colds every winter now but said that's really helped.

Ugh lots of misery in this thread right now. Hope everyone is bearing up.

I'm happy because my exams are over. I've not done as well as I hoped but pretty sure I passed anyway. It was weird doing exams after two decades off but I quite enjoyed it! Although the revising sucked. My eyes are getting crap with age so reading for longs periods hurts.

Now I need to exercise. Think I've put on a few pounds from eating shite while revising. Any excuse.

Hi all sorry about the name change once again (I think it’s from using my laptop and my phone) what a pain lol.

Sorry to everyone feeling crappy. Hope tomorrow brings a better day 💐.

@79andnotout well done on completing the exams with positive thoughts 🎉. I also need to exercise but finding it hard to get the boost I need!

I’m a little drained myself today. Managed to get some in before and after my static smiley... but thinks today’s a no go, I am cream crackers and the only thing I can even think about pouncing on is my bed! Sad but true. I’ll probably kick myself for it later!

Hooray for the end of your exams @79andnotout. I'm so traumatised by my exams on Uni days that I still have nightmares about it. I even remember answering one particular question wrong and now I work with that subject day in day out. It haunts me 😳.

It's V day today. What are your plans ladies? ❤️❤️❤️

I do use the saline rinse, Weathergirl1 and 79andnotout. I think it helps, especially now as it's one of the few things I'm allowed to use.

Well, Valentine's Day plans are obviously ruined. But I woke up about 3:30 and my husband had left me some chocolates and the sweetest card. And honestly that's enough. My ex tried to do bigger gestures but overall he was more of an ass throughout the year, and I know which I'd rather have.

Good job on the exams, 79andnotout! Must be a huge relief.

Ha, thanks. @QuantumGirl - I have a recurring nightmare that I'm sitting my Physics A level and totally failing it. I think it's because I didn't do physics A level and now work in the electronics/materials industry and haven't the foggiest idea of what's going on half the time. I'd love to work back in a field that I'm interested in/qualified in. One day!

OH and I are negligible on the romance scale. I had to remind him it was Valentine's day and he said 'that's not really a thing though, is it, same as Mother's day?' So if we ever have a kid I'll know not to expect anything on mothers day either :) He goes gaming on Thursday nights and I go to the village pub with my mountain biking mates, so it will be business as usual this eve.

How are you feeling today @QuantumGirl?

@Kescilly that's a total arse about Bath. Must be really hard to have colds hit you so much.

How's it looking today @Pinkywoo?

@79andnotout the line is definitely stronger today (DP can actually see it) and I think there's a hint of pink 😱
I'm not going to believe it until AF is late though, today is cd29 so due on tomorrow.

We're crap at valentines, I had to remind him this morning but as we're getting married in May I'll let him off!

That's great @Pinkywoo! Sounds like it's really happening then!