35+ TTC#1 Thread 5

[BambiOnIce80]

New Year, new thread! 🍾🥂

Basically: a wonderful bunch of ladies supporting each other through the TTC journey when trying for a first baby after 35.

Here's hoping 2019 brings some BFP luck to us all!! 🍀🤞🏻🍀🤞🏻

@Felinewoman I would test again in a few days time but not before Saturday. The fact that you had a cold probably messed up with your hormones as your body tried to fix the cold and took all its power and focused on it. Patience my lovely is the only solution 🤒🤓😘

@QuantumGirl no I’ve not seemed any help. I did ask the docs about it when I had another appointment for something else and she said to give it time after coming of the pill and go back in a few months if I’m still not regular. But I am going to book a go appointment tomoz I think because not only am I irregular I am very light. It’s so frustrating that it just isn’t happening. Because I suffer with anxiety I just feel they will slam it all on that and drag it all out.

Well Af I am sure will be here no later than tomorrow.... cramps and spotting. So I’m out this month 👎. Good luck to anyone waiting to test.

I only take folic acid i was going to try some other vitimins but was worried about making my periods even more irregular.

Sorry your having a shit time @VenusStarr it’s so frustrating i imagine.

I bet it’s very frustrating @Felinewomen but maybe it is your cold or the clfact it’s been Xmas and puts everyone out of sorts anyway. Are you usually regular?

@Carley321 great that you booked an appointment with the GP. For now keep telling yourself you will cross that bridge when you get there as a way to manage your anxiety. I also use Pinterest for words of support when I need it including ttc. It's silly I know but does help to keep me positive and focused on what is really important.

@quantumgirl yes I know...and patience is not my strong point
@carlwy321 I am sort of regular. Usually 27-30 days. There were two outliers last year one 23 and one 35... Tomorrow is CD34. I guess I might still be in my normal...I was just hoping that my first month of TTC would be less stressful. Not knowing is annoying.

@QuantumGirl I haven’t booked yet but will try and ring tomorrow.
It’s not at all silly I love a positive quote and I also love Pinterest I use it for just about everything lol. Yes I know. I keep telling myself that I haven’t properly tried because I’ve only used CB for 2 cycles so I’m hopeing Iv just missed OD. I’m even more gutted AF is almost here now though because if my cycles continue to be how they have the last twice now, then it means DP is away slap bang from beginning to end during FW 😡. It’s so bloody annoying!

@Felinewomen yea I understand I think the first month is the most disappointing because you spend so long trying NOT to conceive that you just assume it’ll happen as soon as you stop. This ttc malarkey is most definitely frustrating.

But AF isn’t here yet so you never know 🤞

I know! After avoiding pregnancy for 20 years it felt really weird to have unprotected sex...I had a little panic cry after haha. And I agree, the first time you think you get pregnant when you see a dick ...

Especially as everyone around me seems to be popping out babies! But obviously I don't know their TTC stories

Oh @CNizzle, I'm so, so sorry your dad's not doing well 💐😔 Sending you virtual hugs.x

And sorry AF turned up @PixieN.x

I'm so pleased your counselling session was better this time @VenusStarr 💖 Very frustrating about the GP appointment though! I totally agree with @79andnotout - I want the NHS IVF cycle before I entertain a go at private (although there would be a Chilean wine tour in the middle 🍾🥂😉). Some clinics are surprisingly rapid- when I eventually made it to the ACU with the ex they were literally ready and waiting to go straight away for a cycle of IUI (never had it because we were moving... And then got divorced, of course, but at least it would have been rapid if we hadn't! 😂).

@Carley321, sorry I'm slow off the mark at the moment! To calculate you're own luteal phase it's the time between ovulation and when AF shows. Mine's about 11-12 days. Much easier to pin down if you temp to get the more precise time of ovulation. Did you decide whether you're going to get a cheap 2 decimal place thermometer and give temping a go? I also hope your fur baby is doing better.x

@BambiOnIce80 looks like Af is here so last cycle it was 10 days this cycle it’s 12/13 days. I’ve though about temping but just don’t think it would work for me I don’t sleep great through the night and I’m
Worried that it would just be another obsession for me lol.
Thank you my dog is stable for now we don’t like to say to much about him because we don’t want to jinx it but 🤞 he is fighting to stay with us.
I hope you are ok xx

@Felinewomen 😂 I know the feeling. Everyone seems to be posted babies and scans at the moment.

Thank you all for your support yesterday 💖 had a big chat with dh last night and I feel so sad about what he said. He feels like I've become obsessed and it's all I focus on. He's been feeling quite stressed by my reaction to it. I'm so glad I've started counselling with someone good and I gave a session next week.

We're undecided whether to go private or just wait until March. I actually feel OK to do that as I need to respect his feelings. I tried to explain how out of control I feel but I need to find ways to channel my emotions.

I feel more motivated in myself, small steps but bring healthy with food choices is helping - have lost 5lbs overall so that's motivated me to keep going.

I need to find myself again. The saddest thing was he feels like I've changed - and I have.

Sorry for the long post, just needed to get it out and write it down.

@QuantumGirl I took 400mg once a day, bought it off amazon as ubiquinol so it was the strong stuff!

@Blueberry1 ooh, just scrolled back a little further and saw your post! My son is seven weeks old now. My pregnancy was straightforward but we had a slightly scary delivery involving forceps, a big haemorrhage and him ending up in SCBU with suspected sepsis, thankfully we both made a good recovery and are now doing well!

I think @Janefx40 is due any day now too.

This time last year I was totally miserable, thought I’d never get pregnant and was so focused on ttc that it was putting stress on our normally great relationship. Never thought I’d be here a year on - conceived on what I thought was an anovulatory cycle in which we dtd only once so just goes to show there’s always hope!

Good luck to all of you ttc and for those who are pregnant hope all goes well for you too.

Thanks @Darkstar4855 and congratulations on new baby! Can I ask you how old you were when you conceived? I will be 38 in the next few weeks and I am panicking 😣

Thanks . I was 37 (turned 38 when pregnant) and my partner was 42.

Hello. May I join you ladies? I'm 35 and ttc #1. I had a mmc last April and it took until August for my cycle to regulate again. Since then we've had no luck. AF is currently 5 days late but I have only had negative tests so I reckon that my cycle is messed up this month. No idea when I'll ovulate next but I'll try and use the opks and probably start temping. It's nice to see that there is a great support network here!

Hi everyone, just catching up on the thread...very active!

@Felinewoman - any update? Fx

@QuantumGirl - feeling you on the anxiety about age. I turn 38 soon and the ticking is getting increasingly louder.

@Darkstar4855 - congratulations on the new baby. It's nice to hear the positive stories.

@Carley321 - pleased to hear the your little pooch is doing better.

@edinbeezer - welcome! Sorry to hear about your loss. I had a MMC in Nov and started temping in Dec. I have found that it has helped understand what's going on in there, although am still learning. There are some very knowledgeable ladies on here who will help steer you in the right direction if you have any questions once you start.

@BambiOnIce80 - hope you are doing okay.

Only cd5 here. Feels like a long way to O-day. As I am new to BBT and FF, the app is predicting my O-day to be CD17...seems late in what is usually a 28 day cycle. I've done some research on the length of the luteal phase and it would appear that 12-14 days is the average. Is this something to be concerned about? I won't panic until I have gone through some more cycles as my body still might be regulating after the MC.

@Carley321, I hear you on the 'another thing to obsess about' 🙄 I think I'm lucky because the sciencey part of me really enjoys the data and it's being a real driver in helping me stay off the wine! 😬 I get it could prove more stressful for most though. Very glad to hear your pooch is doing a bit better.x

Sounds like you had a tough chat last night @VenusStarr 💐 You make a really good point that your DH's feelings are every bit as valid as yours. That said, I don't think our other halves quite go through what we go through with TTC (let's face it, we're the ones who feel responsible for trying to ensure everything is done to make it happen) and it's soooo easy to get totally absorbed in it (been there, done that, got the T-shirt 😏). Sounds like you're being really self aware about what's going on, so hat's off to you ✊ You've got this.x

Fantastic to hear your success story @Darkstar4855 🙂

I'm turning 39 in a few months @QuantumGirl and I'm surprisingly not panicking just yet 🤔 It did help a lot today that the lady at the bank when I was registering my Nan's death said she thought I was in my 20's 😁 Pretty sure she was just being polite, but I'll take it! 😂

Welcome @edinbeezer 👋 So sorry to hear about your MC 😔 Just shout if you need any OPK/BBT help - there's a plethora of support and experience here 🙂

It sounds like our cycle twinage is possibly continuing @Amanda81! 😄 I ov'd CD17 last cycle and that was a 29 day cycle. Gives me a luteal phase of between 11 & 12 days. Given implantation happens between 6-10dpo, I'm not too worried (yet!). I'm going to keep an eye on my temping chart and see if my luteal phase is always 11 days and mention it at my ACU appointment in a couple of weeks time. I'll let you know if they say it's anything to worry about (or if they look bored and move swiftly on because they're fed up of neurotic cycle trackers like me!😂).

AF has arrived, I really thought we'd cracked it this month.

@BambiOnIce80 I was asked for ID once when I was 35 and buying a drill bit. All because I was wearing an Alice band 🙄 but yeah, it made my day too. Are you back home now or still down south?

Thanks for the kind welcome messages! I do have a question about bbt: when is the best day of my cycle to start doing this? I would have guessed first day of AF but she's currently missing in action!

Sorry AF arrived @Pinkywoo 💐 I know how disheartening it is when you've done everything possible and she still turns up 😔x

I've done everything I can down south, so I'm back up north now @QuantumGirl 👍 Thankfully a lot of what still needs doing can be done remotely from the comfort of home 🏡 😊

@edinbeezer I'd say you can start anytime really, but it does make the most sense to start when AF turns up. I hope she stays missing for you and you get a BFP instead though 😉

Thanks @BambiOnIce80, it sucks doesn't it, I have just cheered myself up a little bit by ordering my wedding ring though.