Crushing disappointment of TTC

[TheChineseChicken]

TTC number 2 and struggling with the miserable disappointment every month. DD took quite a long time to conceive. Tried for a year, fell pregnant then miscarried at 9 weeks then pregnant again 3 months later. Been trying for number 2 since August and stupidly convinced myself it would be quicker this time due to friends' experiences. But here we are on cycle 5. The not knowing is the worst bit - it could happen this month, it might never happen.

I know that no-one can give me any reassurances but I just wanted to have a moan!

I fished this morning's test out of the bin for some inexplicable reason and saw a faint second line, which is clearly an evaporation line. Just did another test to confirm and it's negative

codenameduchess thank you so much

@LHMB oh wow yep that is one BFP! You deserve this so much buzzing for you. Keep us posted.
@codenameduchess how are you getting on?

I hope so we have some more of you soon and I’m sorry for everyone who’s felt shit recently. Hoping this lovely weather will lift some spirits - I am in need of some sunshine!

I'm good @Ells0204 thanks, all clear from epu after a bleed but everything is looking good so far. It's been a long 3 weeks! How are you?

Ells0204 aw thank you, that means a lot to me

@LHMB oh my gosh congratulations! So much for early menopause hey! You must be so happy.

I can't believe I'm about to say this but I think I can see a faint line. Still no AF and it's CD31 today. Or maybe it's an evap?? I don't want to get my hopes up but my head is all over the place...

Hi liveinhope100. Thank you! I still can't believe it. I did another test as I was in such shock and disbelief and wanted to confirm it with a second test. As you can see it's definitely real

Yes I can see a line so fingers crossed for you

I have IBS and am suffering terribly from trapped wind. TMI! 😳
I've been like this a couple of weeks, now I know why! Have never suffered with it for this long. I can't take my prescribed Buscopan now I'm pregnant so not sure how to ease it. It's very uncomfortable not to mention embarrassing.
Also read that IBS puts you at an increased risk of miscarriage, so that's worrying me.
Sorry everyone.

@liveinhope100 that looks like a line to me! Do you have a FRER you can take instead?

@LHMB ahhhh there’s nothing like seeing those words on the digi! You were so convinced you were out! It proves it really does just hit you out of nowhere and happens when you might least expect it. So pleased for you

@codenameduchess oh good pleased to hear that. I also went to EPU on Tuesday but it’s a walk in service so you can self refer for any reason, saw a tiny little bean shaped thing with a fluttering heartbeat! Just hope I make it through the next 5 weeks now.

Thanks Ells0204
Aww that's lovely, keeping fingers crossed for you that things continue going well

@LHMB pretty sure I have at least a mild form of IBS. My wind was terrible for the first few weeks and I would get the most painful cramps right before passing wind which totally felt like I was going to have a miscarriage. I still get it occasionally but now I’m just constipated really badly and can’t take any medication because I’m super sensitive to laxatives. So yeah just sipping hot squash all day to try and move things along
Sorry for the TMI but we’re all here for it

"Ells0204* it's awful isn't it?
Pregnancy is so glam! But mustn't complain as I've been broody for ages and I never thought it would actually happen.

@Ells0204 I haven't got any FRER but am going to buy one tomorrow! Just done another ic test and I can see the line so I think this might actually be happening.

I honestly thought when I passed the year mark that I wouldn't get pregnant naturally so hopefully if I actually am, this will give some hope to anyone else on this forum!

@LHMB well that's it, you definitely are! Amazing news. I don't want to do a clearblue yet because if I'm getting a faint line on these sensitive tests I don't know if the cb will come up yet as I think it measures 25miu whereas my ones are extra sensitive at 10miU.

Thank you all for your support xx

Just to say, I'm going to ask the MN mods to delete my posts as my sister in law goes on here, just found out, and I don't want to tell anyone I'm pregnant untill I reach the 12 week mark, worried she may see my pots on here and recognise it's me

liveinhope100

@LHMB and @liveinhope100 congratulations! Although @LHMB it was so obvious you were pregnant before you tested 

@codenameduchess and @Ells0204 glad you are both still getting on ok. How are you both feeling?

AF due tomorrow and had BFNs so this cycle is out. Spotting only lasted 24 hours through so much better than last month. Hopefully it was a temporary hormonal blip. Going to try some supplements this month - high dose b and c vitamins. @Ells0204 what else was it you were taking?

No idea why that all posted in bold

TheChineseChicken thank you
It's funny you say that cos my DP said for a couple of days before I tested that I'm pregnant but was adamant I wasn't.

Hoping the Dr will be able to give me something for the IBS. It's making my life a misery. Going from one extreme to the other and I can't take Buscopan now. Whenever I get an upset stomach I take immodium but I'm not sure if I can take that now and don't want to risk it.

I'm sorry you're out this month

My comment about you being pregnant was accompanied by a smiley face when I wrote it! It sounds a bit severe without

I'm not surprised pregnant has made your stomach worse. Hopefully your GP can give you some advice

TheChineseChicken aw thanks

I'm so worried something will go wrong. I'm on antidepressants, been weaning off them for a while now but have stopped them now completely as they're not safe in pregnancy.

Really hope I make it to the 12/13 week mark and that I get to see the baby on the scan and that it's healthy

@thechinesechicken it was a spoonful of raw maca powder and COQ10 every day! I got the COQ10 from Holland and Barrett and I think it was only 60mg so they’re relatively cheap. I also switched my prenatal vitamins to the Seven Seas trying for a baby ones - no idea if that helped. I also used Conceive plus lubricant in the individual applicators from Amazon. Jeez all that haha but looks like it was worth it in the end.

8 weeks tomorrow which has actually gone so quick. The reassurance of my scan last week has worn off and I’m back to being anxious about a MMC now. I’ve just enjoyed a nice alcohol free kopparberg in the garden though!

I've got some bleeding 😪 mild period type cramps, went for a wee, when I wiped there was a small amount of pinkish blood, like the start of a period. I am terrified, in tears, I want to go and get checked out but DP thinks it's normal

@LHMB that's really frightening. At this stage the only thing you can really do is wait and see what happens. So sorry. It may well all be ok but if it isn't you'll get through it. Are you still cramping?

@LHMB it can be normal, keep an eye on it and you can always get checked if it carries on or gets worse. Can you self refer to your epu?

TheChineseChicken the cramping comes and goes, my friend thinks it might be implantation bleeding as it's still so early in the pregnancy. I hope that's all it is.

codenameduchess thank you, I'm not sure, I'll find out now, thank you

@LHMB how are you this morning?