TTC after pregnancy loss - thread 27 - BFPs are coming!

[Yukka]

New Thread as we're at 988 messages on thread 26. we'll do a quick roll call:
Age 39
TTC x1
MC x 3 = Sept + Dec 2017 + May 2018
Currently pregnant again 5w4ds
Diagnosed with APS/Hughes Syndrome. On Asprin since October and start Heparin tomorrow. First scan Monday.

xx

@MakeLemonade try hold out if you can until 12dpo at least. It's tough but better to not be disappointed when potentially it is just too early. Fingers crossed you get your BFP this cycle.

@Lilimum5 agree with the others, this had just been the shittiest year for you (and rest of us). Hope 2019 brings you better times x

@MakeLemonade fsh is follicle stimulating hormone and it's what makes the ovaries get ready to pop the egg out. The higher it is, the harder the ovaries are having to work, which could indicate fewer eggs left.

Mine should have been 8.4 for my age. Anything under 10 is supposed to be ok, so I'm trying to see that as ok. The doctor said that I'm definitely ovulating so she isn't overly worried, but we probably don't have time to hang around. Semen test for Dh is the next step to see how long we should try for naturally. This just isn't how I wanted it to be- stressful and scary. Really don't know how I can change my mindset to feel more positive.

Wish I could see in to the future. Thank you for the hand holds ladies, let's hope 2019 is our year xx

I agree with others - sh1ttiest 2018! And here's to the better 2019 and lots of baby dust across our thread! And whoever else needs it! Everything crossed for us 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻

@TinyPaws thank you. I’ve had all Chicago tests and my partner had the sperm comet tests, both of which resulted in various diagnoses. Unfortunately nothing came of my NHS recurrent miscarriage tests but some of the ladies I’m in touch with online have had testing and treatment through the NHS alone. I’m actually under NHS care as they accepted my private results and are happy to prescribe treatment for clotting issues.

@MakeLemonade couldn’t agree more, total mind fuck! I actually feel a whole lot better after sharing and reading some of your responses though!

@Yukka as you say this treatment plan is may well be the reason why I should keep going. My partner is very much of the mind that the last loss, being so early, isn’t related as such. I’ve had a lot of me time since the summer. Just trying to live without secondary infertility hanging over us. And the counselling has helped but I plan to start yoga again tomorrow and I started swimming again recently. I’ve also got a happiness journal for the next 100 days and love your suggestion of seeing how I feel in a month after using all of these self-care tools.

@Chilliandlime thank you I think a continued breather is very much the right way forward!

@InDreamland your reply really touched me, thank you

Wishing you all a gentle new year and I hope 2019 brings you happiness

Hi all. I just want to say I hope 2019 is better for all of us.

I just posted this on social media alongside an appropriate gif...I think it sums up my feelings exactly...

"Well 2018. Despite the absolute s**t you’ve sent my way I’m still here. Frankly I can’t wait to see the back of you. I know there were some good things that in other years would’ve made for one of the best, but honestly the bad was so bad it sucked all the joy from the good...so in the words of dear old queenie- ta-ra annus horribilis. And listen up 2019-I’m banking on you to turn things around and give me a break yeah?"

@Laney79 hope you don't mind but a stole your social media piece I couldn't have said it any better.

Wishing you all a better year next year xx

No worries @Lilimum5 the gif that went with helped sign it off...ab fab's patsy flicking the v's.

Happy new year ladies, it’s the 2019 huddle, bfps all round this year I’m sure xxx

@weecrumb you really are doing lots of great things to help yourself and that’s fantastic. In fact it’s key, as no-one else can change how you feel but you. They also say that women who start pregnancy with good mental wellbeing are much less likely to suffer post partum depression and anxiety, so all of this is good for the long haul too.

I’m currently 10 weeks pregnant with number 4 after 3 mcs, I’m also on clotting medication, but I started yoga and acupuncture 2 months before we conceived and I can’t tell you how well it helped set me up for being pregnant again. The desperation for a bfp was replaced with looking far longer term than that, arming myself with information to help me and accepting what I can’t change (eg being nearly 40). I’ve also been pretty calm so far.

I’m hopefully going to start swimming this weekend too.

Be proud of how well you are looking after yourself, I think you’ll feel very different in 4 weeks xxx

Hi All,

Just thought I would pop on to wish you a happy New Year.
Haven't posted recently as am not TTC, and am in the middle of RMC tests. Hoping to be back to it in a couple of months.
Agree that 2018 has been the toughest of years, and love your post @Laney79.

Wishing us all lots of luck and baby dust in 2019 xxx

Hi everyone can I join the thread? Sorry to everyone for their losses and hope 2019 is a better year for you all.

Age 37. TTC#2. Got our BFP after 9 cycles at end of November but mmc discovered 24/12 at 8 weeks then miscarried over Christmas.

I hope you don't mind me asking but how did you know when you were ready to TTC again? Part of me just wants to start right away and part of me just feels exhausted even thinking about starting all over again

Also love your post @Laney79, totally captures how I feel about last year!
Was feeling positive yesterday as I went to the gp to get a referral to the rmc. I was told by the consultant at the hospital that I'd have to wait 8 weeks to have the blood tests but I found out from the gp they'd already tested for potential hormonal issues in September and all came back fine, so I can have the other blood tests tomorrow and was hoping I'd be able to take them to a private consultation before the end of January rather than waiting several months for the rmc appointment.
Feeling pretty low this morning though as close friend just texted to tell me she's pregnant as we were supposed to meet up today and she knew it would be hard for me. Was waiting for this text and trying to prepare myself as her dd is 3 and she'd been so supportive by text over the past month but hadn't offered to visit, as it would probably have been hard to hide. I'm happy for her but why are pregnancy announcements so uniquely painful when you're going through this. OH is trying to be supportive but is finding it hard to understand.

Hoping that all of us on here have a much happier 2019 xxx

@dragonmummy17 my mc (TTC#2 as well) was in Dec and am trying again straightaway. Different for everyone I imagine but DH and I have agreed that the only way to 'make this better' for us will be to have a successful pregnancy asap. Might well feel differently if this turns into a series of mc of course.

I also heard, could be myth, that you are slightly more fertile after a mc for some weird reason so don't want to waste that window if it is true as took so much longer to get pg this time compared to DD and it didn't even work out.

Happy New Year ladies!

A question for you that do acupuncture - did you go to anyone or do you have to find one that specialises in for example fertility?

Hey
@Coffeist I was recommended my acupuncture lady from a friend who used her during IVF.
She does a lot of fertility work but not only fertility. There is a registration for acupuncturists, might be worth looking there on British Acupuncture Council.
X

@Coffeist and happy new year x

Wishing you all the best for 2019 ladies! Hope you enjoyed last night as much as you could. I might be in tww but still had a glass of bubbly at midnight.

@Laney79 what a fab post! When midnight struck I said something off a similar wording whilst toasting my mates and DH.

@fnej01 hope when you start TTC again you have a smooth journey.

@dragonmummy17 sorry you find yourself here but you've come to the right place. The ladies here are so supportive. We started TTC straight after first AF after both mc's. If you feel ready then go for it.

@Chilliandlime pregnancy news is always difficult to cope with. Sending you lots of hugs

@coffeist sorry I've never tried acupuncture before but I'm sure someone who has will be along soon. Hope it works for you.

@coffeist I did a local google search for my acupuncturist, many will have websites with profiles. We exchanged a few emails first then I went for a consultation. Some do specialise but mostly it’s a generalised practise as they will have learnt all the acupuncture points for all conditions. Deff make sure they are registered. Hope you find someone :)

@wearytree thanks for the explanation, still learning the lingo! If you’re doc isn’t worried, try to follow her lead - even though I know that’s really hard!

I found both my acupuncturist and reflexologist through my local IVF clinics website - I’ve not seen the clinic for anything else but seemed like a good place to start finding people who are interested/specialised in fertility. Might be worth checking @coffeist?

Welcome @dragonmummy17 - sorry for your loss and that you find yourself here.

Thanks for the wise advice to wait until 12 dpo, sorry to say I didn’t follow it and tested this morning on an Internet cheapie and BFN. I also feel like AF is due. We are away for a few days so going to try and not think about it or test again until the weekend when AF is due.

Wishing everyone a happy, healthy 2019!

Thanks all - I shall do some research. Good tip on checking local IVF clinic websites!

Hi
I had an MVA at the end of October. Miraculously AF was late in December and I got a BFP on Christmas Day. I think I'm about 5 weeks.
However I've been bleeding all day (like a typical period) and now booked in for an early scan on Friday morning but I'm 99.9% sure I've lost this one.
I was feeling so optimistic for 2019 but now questioning if this is going to be our year at all.

@SJR86 so sorry you are going through this. There's nothing worse than waiting for that scan, keeping everything crossed for you for Friday morning xx

@MakeLemonade sorry for the BFP. You're not out though until the witch arrives. You could've had a late implanter? Still keeping fx for you x

@SJR86 sorry for your loss in October. Lovely news of the BFP on Christmas day, hopefully bean is still sticky and all will be well and just a scare. Keeping my fx for you for Friday x

So I'm either 10 or 11dpo I think according to when I got a CB OPK flashing smiley. Problem is I don't actually know exactly when AF is due. CD1 was on 9th December but that was my first AF since early mc in November when bleeding started on the 10th but think I passed everything on 11th November as that's when I had really heavy bleeding - making it a 30 day cycle. Cycle length since first mc in July had been 27 days. Guess I should expect AF in the next 3-7 days? I hate the TWW although I certainly don't think this will be a new year miracle given I decided to have a glass of bubbly NYE. Trying to have a baby is so painful and such a head f**k.

Anymore POAS this morning?

We need a first BFP of the year on this thread.

Had a cry lastnight. The plan I had in June/July before first mc was to not return to work after the Christmas and new year period, take some annual leave then go straight into maternity leave. Giving me time to sort things out before baby joined us. Instead I am working and not even pregnant. 3 weeks and 1 day now until due date oh how lovely a BFP this month will be but not at all confident. At least I can say we tried. DTD lots from flashing smiley and static smiley. This has to be the worst tww of all of them I've ever had.

@InDreamland fingers crossed it's your month. Sounds like our dates are similar, first one would have been due at the start of Feb. Currently waiting for af after erpc 4 weeks ago and MVA a week ago, not sure if that reset the clock and I have to wait another 4-6 weeks, or if it'll be quicker because hcg levels had already gone down a lot (based on faintness of bfp last week)?
It's really unfair isn't it xx