The Struggle Club

[LochNessMumster87]

Hello beautiful ladies. First of all, I have pcos....i was told I would have alot of trouble ttc... And boy were they right. Every month of a bfn rips another little piece of my heart out 😞 im desperate for another baby, and I constantly think about being pregnant and how exciting it will be and having a little baby in our lives. So I thought I would make a thread for all of us out there who feel this way and are struggling and just need some support and some friends. Let's support each other, because it's always nice to have other people in the same boat to talk to. So come join, and go on our difficult journeys together and hopefully this thread is going to be filled with the sweet sights of BIG FAT POSITIVES before too long 🤗😊♥️👶🎉

I’d like to join please, been ttc for 1 year and nothing. Most of my friends don’t understand so it’s nice to have a supportive forum to go to.

@LochNessMumster87
Your message is so sweet and positive and exactly what I needed 😘 I sometimes feel lost with all this baby making (or not making in my case!!) that I sometimes forget who I am and who my DH is... so I think I need to try and distract myself from the whole business and focus on "us" and if it happens... WOO HOO!!!

Hope youse all have a brilliant weekend. And it's the 1st of December ❤️❤️

Everyone in this group is such inspirations going through their own journeys. I had a proper wobble when AF arrived but after speaking to my OH and having a proper heart to heart we both realised that as much as we do want it we have to enjoy the life we have been given as well. It's the 1st of December and I love Christmas but been so engrossed with TWW I feel like it's all passing me by. Today is a new day, it's the first day of opening my advent calendar (yes I am still a child at heart!!) and my tree is going up tomorrow!!
Big love to everyone who is struggling, as I have learnt the hard way this year, life and the people in it are precious!!
Happy Saturday and happy December 1st 🎅🎄🎉

@sal1987
Hear, hear!!! 😘

Hello @RC1985 sorry to hear you've been struggling too. Hope you get your BFP soon!

@sal1987 yay for the Christmas month! Happy 1st December to you too. I've opened my advent calendar and I'm off to get my Christmas tree today 🎄

I had a temp spike this morning that confused me. All my ovulation signs were a few days ago but my temps stayed low until the random spike this morning. Will have to see what it does tomorrow.

Well ladies,

I woke up to AF... no surprise really, as there is a reason we are waiting for IVF... coz we can't get pregnant!!!!! 😥😥😥😥😥😥

I am in such a rotten and bad place, I can't seem to do anything else but cry!! Everywhere I look there are big, gorgeous pregnant mummies to be, and all I want is to be in that cool group 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

How do you stop hurting? How do you stop hoping?

I'm just feeling so so lost and heartbroken 💔💔💔

@clouddreamer I feel the same. Been crying all weekend. I haven’t even gone for fertility tests yet and I’m a mess. I really need to find a way to chill out because this is not good for me!

So sorry for AF @Clouddreamer sending lots of love to you and @RC1985 it's all consuming isn't it? I think there's something about this time of year that makes it harder too. I hope you both get your turn soon!

I'm so sorry @Clouddreamer and @RC1985. You are entitled to be upset. Just make sure you also take some time for a bit of self love. Sending you both a virtual hug xx

Any update on the temps @NoseringGirl?

Loving your positivity @sal1987, happy December to you too!

How is everyone getting on? Sorry I've been quiet. 7dpo and my temps have been gradually dropping for the last few days and I'm now below my cover line. I think I'm having my second strange cycle in a row and I've spent far too much time consulting Dr Google which is never a good idea 🙈

@LondonKez I spend so much time googling every symptom each cycle! It's practically a hobby now 🙈

These are my temps for this cycle. FF doesn't think it's ovulatory and is probably right.

Can I join please? TTC #1, cycle 6 now. (Or 8 counting two last year) Doctors saying it's PCOS, I have a scan for it tomorrow. Just getting fed up of hoping and waiting and having every symptom under the sun and then AF hits 😩

Hello @cupcakesandglitter 👋
Best of luck with the scan! I have PCOS and once I was diagnosed I was able to get it quite well under control as I knew what I was dealing with (well until recently anyway!) so hopefully this will lead to good things for you!

Hey @NoseringGirl sorry to see you on here too, wished we had our BFPs by now 😩 do you mind me asking what happened during/after the scan? I've had back pain since AF turned up at 5DPO, and then spotting since so I don't know what's going on. I've also had pain around my right ovary for the last few days - is that a PCOS thing? Xx

I get random pain and sometimes spotting too. I think the cysts can cause pain and I usually put the spotting down to the hormonal imbalance. Hopefully the scan will give you answers!
When I had mine, I had to drink a lot of water beforehand to make it easier to see my womb. They did an external scan. Then I had to go for a wee (which was the biggest relief in the world!) and had an internal scan so they could see in more detail. They didn't tell me anything at the scan but I had a follow up with the gynaecologist a few days later where he said that the cysts on my ovaries, the LH/FSH ratio on my blood test and history of irregular cycles along with a couple of other symptoms meant he was confident that I had PCOS. He prescribed metformin which made a massive difference to me. I think it only took about 3 months after that to fall pregnant with DS2. He was going to prescribe clomid again (which I had to conceive DS1) if the metformin hadn't done it's job.
I'm hoping to go back on metformin in the new year!

Oh okay thanks @NoseringGirl - hopefully it's that straight forward for me too, I need answers 😩

Well ladies, just back from the GP who has signed me off for 2 weeks and started me on an antidepressant. She wants me to take it a day at a time, go for walks "to clear out the cobwebs" and go back to counselling that my fertility clinic run.

Feel like such a failure and so weak... 😭😭😭

Hi ladies! Mind if I join in? We've been trying for about 2 years now. I've done 2 cycles of IUI for unexplained fertility. I had my last IUI over 2 weeks ago, but still haven't gotten the nerve to take a test. Just don't want the disappointment! So now I'm just waiting to see if I start my period. So frustrating. Infertility sucks.

That's frustrating @NoseringGirl, do you have late ovulation in cycles or do you not ovulate at all in those cycles? I think I may have low progesterone (according to Google!)

Hi @cupcakesandglitter, good luck with your scan. I hope your results give you some clarity.

There's absolutely no shame in getting help @Clouddreamer. We do so much to try and get our bodies to welcome a pregnancy that our emotional well-being takes a real hit. Take time to look after yourself even if it's as simple as a walk, hot bath or going out on a date night.

Welcome @Ifeelinclined, though I hope you won't be here long! Fingers crossed for you!

@Clouddreamer you are in no way a failure nor are you weak. You're dealing with very stressful circumstances and you've sought out and are accepting help to deal with that. That takes enormous strength and courage. Well done to you for taking care of yourself like that. I hope the medication helps.

@Ifeelinclined welcome and best of luck, hope AF stays away!

@cupcakesandglitter I did various things to change my lifestyle alongside it so there was some work involved but getting the PCOS diagnosis was definitely the turning point for me. I hope you get answers too. Once you know what you're dealing with, it's easier to... well deal with it 🤣

@LondonKez I have ovulated late before but I think most of the time when my cycles are long I just don't ovulate and then I get breakthrough bleeding.
Ahh Dr Google, I've had many appointments with him now! Is it the low temps that have led to thinking that or are there other symptoms too?

@Ifeelinclined Welcome! I can relate around not wanting to take a test, the possibility of being pregnant is always better than the disappointment of a bfn. As I have quite short cycles, I haven't had to test much. Fx that you get your BFP this cycle.

@Clouddreamer, Completely agree with NoseringGirl, it takes real strength to recognise that you need some support and to reach out. I hope you start to feel better soon. Remember to be as kind to yourself as you would be to a friend experiencing the same thing. You will get through this

Wow, what a welcoming thread! Thank you all for the encouragement! I'm so glad I found you ladies. I hope we all get out BFPs soon!

@Clouddreamer, please don't feel like a failure for doing what you need to do. MH is just as important as physical health. I take citalopram myself, and it helps. Infertility is so hard, and well done for taking care of yourself. I hope that the time off and meds help you to start feeling better. But if they don't, please go back to your doctor. And please be gentle to yourself.

Well, I started my period today. I'm so sick of trying and getting no results. I don't know how much more disappointment I can take.

@clouddreamer I think your brave for going to the GP and saying I need help. It's hard to admit that TTC is so emotionally taxing! So well done for reaching out. Hopefully some time off looking after yourself will help.

@ifeelinclined sorry to hear about AF :( it really does suck sometimes!!

Someone at work asked me why I didn't seem myself today so I was quite open with her and told her I was struggling with the whole ttc job. I got the usual forget about it, it'll happen when you stop thinking about It, just relax talk! I was like seriously it is impossible to not think about it given I can tell you without even thinking about it what CD I am and when I am due AF so how can I not thunk about It!! And breath! Haha

@NoseringGirl mainly my temps. They've dropped below the cover line twice this cycle. They did the same last cycle and I had spotting for 4 days before a very light AF. It looks as though the same thing is about to happen. My temps overall have been getting lower, but I don't know if that's because it's getting colder? Just generally feeling a bit fed up and hopeless even though I've got 3-4 days to go...

Has anyone listened to the Big Fat Negative podcast? It's funny but honest and also quite refreshing to hear people share our frustrations out loud. They also get a scientist to prove or disprove myths about relaxing and pineapple cores etc. They also have a PCOS expert on one episode, though I'm sure it may be information you already know!