Over 40 ttc - winter baby dust for me!

[Orchid222]

Here's our new thread ladies.

Merry Christmas lovely ladies! Who knows... maybe this time next year we will all have an extra little bundle xxx

Mimosa-bad timing of good timing with Booseys AF, it sucks but at least she can eat, drink and be merry...I had to forgo a lot of my favourites today Ana last night for that matter because I'm still in the land of the unknown...great to have hope but I'll be really annoyed to get bfn after not eating my Christmas favourites.
Rose- let's hope so! 🤞

@littlemimosa , never had any side effect from it.
@Rose68 , absolutely! And I'm convinced we all will get there!
@Orchid222 early days and please try to stay positive! Crossing absolutely everything for you!!

@littlemimosa..thanks. yes i can at least have a nice indulgent Xmas .
Got AF cramps but at least it's not debilitating like last time.

@Orchid222... hoping it's positive this time. Sending sparkly Christmas baby dust your way

@BooseysMom ooh noooo lots of booze needed.. xxx

Chatbash72..exactly Chat! Better than pain killers. My mum swore by a drop of brandy in her coffee when she had cramps. I have M&S choc liqueur and that's lush in coffee!

Thanks Russ and Booseys. I was in boots on Monday and picked up a frer, stared at it and put it away resisting the temptation to buy it- I was v proud of myself lol.
Booseys that liqueur sounds yummy!

Happy Christmas to everyone! It was a little bit hard for me....just emotional. I'm from a big family and the idea of having just one child at Christmas in the future (if he even spends it with us every year once he's grown up) seems so sad and incomplete. I know lots of people choose an only child and my perceptions are being shaped by my own upbringing, but it feels terrible to me. I do know I'm incredibly blessed to even have such a lovely and perfect LB. I exhaust myself loving and caring for him and just being with him as much as physically possible, but then that guilty feeling of letting him down by not giving him a "proper" family makes my heart sink and feel like I'll never make it up to him however much I try. I'm 6 months past the deadline I set of 43. I'm in a FB group for my DC's birth month and almost everyone is pregnant. Some of them were on the pill, or initially annoyed at the timing of an accidental second pregnancy. Real life friends are also pregnant. It just hurts sometimes. I know at least here you understand. I hope everyone enjoyed their Christmas regardless of the sadness we must all feel about our fertility state. Surely we deserve some good news soon.

Petra, I understand how you feel. I am blessed to have 2, but I've always had in my head that I would have 3. I am from a family of 3 children and it just feels right to me, and the thought that I'm too old to make that happen now is sad. And the acceptance that this is something we can't change or go back on. It feels final.
My eldest aaked me the other day when are we going to have a baby (a lot of his friends have new baby siblings now) then he followed that up with "please can we have a baby" then my youngest joined in, jumping up and down saying please please please! Then they started choosing names. It made me sad. I don't have the heart to tell them I may be too old now, as I would love nothing more than to give them a baby sibling

Hi All, hope you've had a lovely Christmas. Just had news that one of my friends is pregnant with #2, the same person who never wanted children. Gutted. Iui#2 failed on 17th December. Home for Christmas, back to iui#3 when I get back home again. Would straight to ivf be better? Even then, it isn't guaranteed. Feel so sad. Husband blaming himself.

@Presh12345 - you will have a better chance with IVF - around 15, maybe 20% as opposed to 5 - 10% max with IUI at our age. Of course it's much more invasive so you both have to be 100% certain that's what you want to do before you start!

Why is your husband blaming himself? It's no one's fault, just (really shitty) luck and biology. Xxx

@Petra I know how you feel, even though I already have 2, I think we all feel the same no matter how many DC we are lucky enough to have. I am from a family of 4 children, and I always planned / wanted to have 3. But DH only wanted 2, so we compromised on 2, and now I am gutted and trying so so hard not to be resentful, and unfortunately I am not always successful.
I have 2 BILs, neither are interested in spending Xmas day with their families, they always want to spend it with ours. My DH is better, we rotate one year my family, the next his. I do worry wonder if our boys will want to spend Xmas with us once they are grown up.

Hi everyone. Merry Christmas. Sorry to read quite a few of you are back to square one again this month. Same here. Have just finished af after mc so going to try again around new year. Just received phone call after work today to ask why I didn’t attend my scan (would have been just under 14 weeks) so told them I had mc last month and hospital were aware. They couldn’t apologise enough but I am so annoyed at the whole experience I have had that I am going to complain about the treatment I’ve received if only to make them realise that they need to get their records up to date more quickly once told, even if they don’t bother to properly check for miscarriage in the first place! Anyway, I am still feeling hopeful for next time and have my fingers crossed for all of you lovely ladies who welcomed and consoled me in the first place x

@Whatcanihave...i'm v sorry to hear of your mc and now this. Sadly it sounds all too familiar with the NHS. One dept not talking to another. Wishing you a happier New Year xx

Evening ladies 😊 popping in after a three-day food bender I think I actually look like a roast potato now

Biggest hugs and love to everyone feeling at a low ebb at the mo. There have been a few bub announcements here too - a lady on my team at work has a lovely bump...funnily enough she was due when I had my first mc and I recall staring at her with a bizarre fascination as I tried to figure out why she could carry a successful pregnancy and I couldn't. An old school buddy has also just posted on ig that she's about to give birth at any point... I'm taking the positive in that she's 7-8 months older than me so there's still much hope. In fact, I'm full of hope for everyone - may 2019 be our year ❤️❤️❤️❤️

So sorry everyone is feeling blue. There’s something about this time of year I think that makes you re-assess everything plus emotions are heightened.
It’s not over though yet ladies. Whilst there are still eggs being released we are still in with a chance. Age is just a number! C’mon we can do it (tries desperately to inject some positivity!).
Despite all that I do DO understand. There’s no more painful a feeling than desperately wanting a baby in your arms and not being able to have it. No matter if it’s your first, second, third or more you’re trying for. It breaks your heart.

AFM I think I’m succeeding in putting a bit of weight on, hurrah. Xmas makes it easier of course. Am hoping it’ll improve my hormones as you need fat to make hormones especially oestrogen which I’m lacking. Due AF in a few days, think I’m 10dpo so probably another 5/6 days to go. Oh and I started the dhea. Only doing 30mg per day to start with then after AF I’ll increase the dosage to 50/60. Praying it helps.

Cross posts Karry! I love your food bender comment😂 I’ve eaten plenty too but how do I put weight on without eating loads of crap?? I’m getting there but it’s not as easy as it sounds. Things I’m trying, peanut butter on toast on top on my normal breakfast, avocado on everything, butter and olive oil on everything, extra nuts and raisins, oatcakes and hummus snacks, cream in soups, boiled egg snacks. Anyone got any ideas?

Protein mimosa! Anything protein is great for oestrogen, general ttc and also healthy weight gain

Thanks Cleo - I do eat a decent amount of meat and fish everyday but will try to add in some extra protein snacks. I wonder what’s in a protein shake....

@littlemimosa ha! Sounds like you're eating all the right stuff...it's hard to think of healthy foods...I was a skinny little thing in my 20s and I tried having double lunches for a while to try and put weight on - ate lots of rice and macaroni cheese needless to say I'm in no danger of being skinny at the moment...at least, not the middle part of my body 🙄 lol x

@littlemimosa you are so right... while we still ov there is still a chance and a Christmas blow out of booze and nice food is not going to do any thing but relax us and that's probably the most important ingredient to conceive..
sending lots of love xxx

Morning ladies. I've been following you all without dipping in too much. You all gave such wonderful support and advice. I had been ttc no.2 for over 2 years. I'm 42. I got my BFP back in September.

I'm now 19 weeks and so far so good. I'm keen to encourage you to keep the faith without shoving yet another pregnancy in your face. But I'm watching and willing you all healthy pregnancies. I'm afraid I don't have experience of the ivf process but I know only too well the feeling of others being pregnant around me....when is it my turn?

I'm certainly not out of the woods yet. I'm being pretty cautious with this pregnancy. 20 wk scan next week is the next milestone.

Sending you all love and plenty of baby dust. Willing lots of BFPs on here for 2019 x

Thank you mellon, you do give us hope! Fingers crossed your 20 week scan goes perfectly. Keep us updated!
Did you do anything different on your bfp cycle? What suppliments were you taking?

Thanks Mellon and good luck with your scan!
As for me it looks like our IVF didn't work:(
I was supposed to test on Monday but that's 16 days after EC and from what I've read most women are told to test 2 weeks after. I'm 13 days past EC now and didn't test with a frer but at this point most tests would pick it up so I don't have a lot of hope. The annoying thing is that if I want to go for another cycle in Feb I need to stay with my clinic (we're away most of Jan so I don't have time to switch clinics) and they don't do packages so that's where it starts to get very expensive...😢

Don't get down too soon orchid, it's not over yet. Hold out a little hope until actual testing day or AF. You never know.
Did you pay for a one off cycle this time? They often say it's more likely to work 2nd time as they adjust meds etc to your personal requirements after learning what you need from 1st time, which is why a lot of places offer packages of 2 or 3 cycles. I think if this cycle doesn't work it could be worth trying a second if you can.