35+ TTC#1 Thread 4

[BambiOnIce80]

We're very close to maxing-out our previous thread, so time to start afresh 🙂

To borrow the intro from @Blondcat (our old threads founder):

A wonderful bunch of ladies supporting each other through the ttc journey when trying for a first baby after 35.

Good luck all!! 🍀🤞🏻🍀🤞🏻

Thanks @79andnotout. :)

We don’t actually keep the cat out of the bedroom! I’m not allergic to him so he comes in and wakes us for his breakfast and is our little furry alarm clock. I just thought it might be useful for those who do have allergies.

My cats are indoors! They were adopted as adults and had never been outside so they don’t care. We use this brilliant litter that never smells because you scoop at the clumps, it’s made of corn 🌽🌽🌽.

Russian blue cats have quite plush fur with lots of undercoat, I probably wouldn’t recommend for you Bambi.

So many good cat tips on here! Thank you ladies! I'm particularly interested in the stink-reducing corn litter @Melamine 🌽 Do you have a link for it? I think I'll wait until the new year before I throw myself into the cat search (I don't want any rescue centres/breeders to think I'm the 'get a pet for Christmas' type!). DP would rather wait until after we've found out what the outcome is of any IVF we may have before getting a cat 🙀 To be fair, him and his ex had 2 dogs, 5 cats and 4 ferrets that he was at the vets with monthly, so he's understandably a bit cautious about going back into pet ownership 😏

I had a lovely meal, thank you @Carley321 😊 I hope you had a good time getting tipsy? 🥂 Thanks for the link too - I'll give it a read when I get a minute 👍

@BambiOnIce80 I think the corn litter is called Maizy - you can flush it down the loo. I used to get it on Amazon but it stopped being available recently. Now using 'the worlds best cat litter' which has a bold name (!) but is as good if not slightly better than Maizy - can flush it and it clumps. Less smell than catsan etc.

"To be fair, him and his ex had 2 dogs, 5 cats and 4 ferrets that he was at the vets with monthly, so he's understandably a bit cautious about going back into pet ownership 😏"

Wow, that's worse than me! We would definitely have more pets if I had my way, but none that smell. I'm assuming ferrets stink! One of the reasons I got a greyhound is because they don't smell and are very clean, always washing themselves like cats. Unfortunately I forgot to factor in her stinky breath. They have terrible teeth (they get fed all sorts of crap by their trainers in their racing years).

That cat litter sounds great. If we are in need of any again if our cats are ill I'll give that a go. We back onto a railway line (right next to a station so very low speed) and the cats use that as their toilet. I can see them crapping while I wait for the train sometimes!

Waiting until after IVF info is sensible. I've been told the same about dog number 2 from the OH. I know he is right.

@Kescilly - we have the furry alarm clocks too. I just wish we could set them for a bit later, especially on the weekend!

We also have the furry alarm! My dog sleeps downstairs but once he is awake he will whine and then he is let up to join us on the bed for a bit. He does hog the duvet though!!

@79andnotout - good to hear things are moving and IVF is on the horizon. How long does it take to get to that stage after first going to the doctor?

I went for my exploratory ultrasound today and they said everything looked fine except for a small cyst on one ovary which I won't worry about too much. She did at least confirm that I had ovulated so I'm pleased about that even though I was sure that I was - it's just nice to have the confirmation.

Just chipping in on the cat chat 🐈 we were going to get a rescue but then we went on holiday, had family drama and started ttc so I think we’re going to wait and if plans come to fruition we’ll get one while I am on Mat leave. I had cats as a child and we were not allowed to have them in our bedrooms at all. I am allergic to cats but owning one seems to desensitise me a bit so you might find that too @BambiOnIce80

In other news, I am having a weird cycle after my cp, I am not certain but I think I might have ovulated twice, once earlier on around cd 7 and again (very painfully) around cd 16. I’ve been having twinges in my lower stomach over cd21-22 and quite achy boobs though only in afternoons but obviously these symptoms could just be how my cycles will be from now on, altered by the cp.

I also had a bit of an emotional meltdown yesterday - I feel like I don’t know myself. I am notoriously grumpy and not usually a teary person at all!

I’m not sure when af is due because of my wonky ovulation but at the latest it’ll be 1st of December, but if it’s a regular 30 day cycle then it’ll be 26th of November.

I am very tempted to test again but after last time, I am a bit scared to. Part of me thinks that if I test early and have another co, at least I’ll know that there may (potentially) be an issue and I can start getting it looked into.

Do you all find that if you ovulate late then af is late or does it arrive on time?

Also because my ovulation was late I am having to do the full 20 cbfm sticks this cycle - I know I could have stopped after the first peak but the sticks are showing a slight lh surge over the last 3-4 days so I am sticking with it to see where that goes.

@MrsRRC - if my ovulation is late then AF is late. My luteal phase is 11 days unless there was something going on with me that month (illness or something).

@Oxted2018 - that's good news about your scan. WRT IVF, I have another appointment with the gynae (waiting for it to come through), although he said in the letter he will refer me straight on for IVF if we meet the criteria (age, BMI, non-smoking, no other kids, no STDs/AIDS, together minimum a couple of years). Depending which one I get referred to (I've been given recommendations of the best NHS clinics by my friend who has seen them all), I think it's quite fast, probably looking at the first quarter of next year. We win the IVF lottery in our area though, it seems to come top of the lists in terms of wait times and number of goes. So, I'm guessing Feb/March? Will prob try and delay it by a couple of months so we get a good few more months of trying naturally first. But, it does make me feel happy to know the wheels are in motion and we'll have done all we can before my 40th birthday!

@Oxted2018 and @79andnotout my husband is the one that does breakfast for the cat, so the furry alarm goes directly for him in the morning! Lets me sleep in a bit.

Originally I was okay, but now I'm kind of freaking out about my failed Harmony test. I looked into it and there is a correlation, basically those who fail the first time have a higher chance of the various trisomies. This doesn't happen in all the cases but I now feel like I've got an increased risk and I'm regretting telling family about the pregnancy this weekend.

I've got my NHS scan for NT testing in two hours so I'll have to see what they come up with.

@Kescilly - that may be the case but also humans make mistakes. I worked in a lab for ten years - fuckups can happen (quite easily). Fingers crossed for your appointment this afternoon though. Is it an instant thing?

@MrsRRC I don’t have enough data to say conclusively, but I did have a look back and there were a few times I ovulated late and then had longer cycles. My luteal phase wasn’t consistent though.

@79andnotout that’s exciting that things are moving forward! How many rounds of IVF would you consider?

Thanks @79andnotout @Kescilly

@Kescilly got my fingers crossed for you 🤞🏻 Xxx

@Kescilly, I totally understand how you could be freaking out from that information from Dr Google, but please try not to go down that rabbit hole. Absolutely agree with @79andnotout about it easily being down to human issues and nothing to do with something being wrong with you/the baby. I've had a quick read up on the harmony test (I wasn't familiar with it) and it looks like it tries to do DNA analysis on featal cells circulating in the mother's blood... that should be crazy small amounts of material (there shouldn't be loads of foetal cells floating around in you in the first place!), so I would imagine that it's really, really common for that test to fail in the first place. That'll be the reason that it isn't offered on the NHS - flipping expensive and not very reliable! Please let us know how you get on with the (good old 😉) NHS scan 🍀

Excellent news on the ultrasound result @Oxted2018 😊 When I had mine (ages ago!) I had double figures of cysts on my right ovary and single figures of them on my left. I was about to start freaking out but the docs said they weren't concerned about that at all because all my test information confirmed I'm still ovulating (basically, 1 cyst is pretty good going by the sounds of things! 😂). Did they say what tests are next for you or is it over to the ACU now?

@MrsRRC, so sorry for the emotional meltdown 💐 I know it's zero consolation, but maybe your hormones are going a bit haywire post CP? Double the targets to hit if you've ovulated twice though, so hopefully it'll be good news for you at the end of this cycle 🤞🏻

Kitten quandary update - DP has said if I can befriend the vet who lives opposite us and get 'satisfactory' answers to his concerns, then we can consider the cat in the new year... Challenge accepted- game on!! 😎

Oooh, and thank you for the 'worlds best' cat litter amazon heads-up @pattyhoo! It was instrumental in combating DP's 'stinky litter' qualm and has attributed to this development! 😘

@Kescilly - not really sure! Will see what the first round digs up. If it's a disaster we might just call it a day. If it goes okay but they spot obvious improvements in the procedure and recommend another go, then we'd do that. But not really sure how many we could feasible fit in before I turn 40 anyway, and whether once I turn 40 I am no longer eligible for more. Hmm.

@BambiOnIce80 - sounds like you'll be getting a cat!!

@BambiOnIce80 I think they probably are. I am such a regular cycle, no pmt sort of person. Massive respect to all the ladies that feel like laughing and crying at the same time whilst eating a family sized bar of dairymilk at some point during their cycle every month.

@79andnotout it sounds like your proactive approach will pay off quite quickly, which is cautiously exciting 🍀

I had a quick read about the harmony test, is this more conclusive than the NIPT testing - I really don’t know much about it at all. I can definitely see a margin for error with it generally and combined with human error it doesn’t sound entirely reliable.

Ah I missed some messages earlier, sorry! We had the scan and they said everything was within range. But they gave us a measurement of 2.9 which looks like it’s on the high side.

We don’t get the risk results for a couple weeks so we will have to wait and see what happens when it’s combined with the blood test. Or if the Harmony test comes back sooner, that would be great!

@MrsRRC the Harmony test is a form of NIPT. It’s not routinely offered on the NHS though it’s starting to come out in some areas. The NHS generally offers an NT test when you have your twelve week scan.

Tested yesterday morning and again last night and BFN :( so discouraging...still cramping here and there and had a headache almost all day yesterday, which is the first sign AF will arrive at the end of the week ...hope you all get your BFP.

Ah thanks @Kescilly.

Well that is encouraging news on the scan front, Fingers crossed for more positive news from your other results 🍀 🤞🏻

Sorry to hear about your bfn @EsaBel remember that you are not out until AF shows, hope it stays away🤞🏻

Thanks for the kind words @MrsRRC...From your mouth to God's ears 🤞🏻 I'll keep you all posted.

AF arrived today! Making the shortest cycle ever - 23 days! And my IVF drugs haven't even been couriered to me yet! Should be here on Wednesday and I could start injections on Thursday. All to confirm with my doctor tomorrow. Interesting times ahead! I'm trying to work our scans over here and then fly home to my clinic for egg collection and transfer. A few logistics involved, I must admit. But determined to get there in the end! And hoping for the positive outcome!

@Russkispy - you sound really positive which is brilliant. Fingers crossed for you and this month.

@Bambi - thanks for the supportive words 're the scan. I reckon loads of us must have cysts and god knows what else that don't bother us and we only learn about them when we go prodding about.

AF was due for me yesterday (although one app says it is tomorrow) but no sign as yet. I have s short luteal phase though so am only 11 dpo and suspect I may just be late as my body sorts itself out from last month's weirdness. Will give it a few more days and then test if AF doesn't show. I did actually wake up in a bit of a panic that I might be pregnant!! Haha - there is no pleasing me!!!

@Kescilly - I'm glad the scan went well and everything seems to be going as it should. I can imagine it is stressful though. I keep thinking the TTC is the hard bit and then it gets easier but I'm really not sure that is right xx