Any CATHOLIC friendly contraception out there??

[barina]

Hi all,

Bit of a weird post but any advice welcome. My partner is catholic, not overly strict but still quite catholic 'abiding' and I am looking for catholic friendly contraception. He has heard that some pills, create an abortion like scenario where they allow the egg to be fertilised, but effect the lining of the womb so they can not house the feteous. Anyway so the pill is not ideal. Any one else out there catholic, and having sex!! Sorry if tmi!

thanks

That's it problem solved!!
dum, dum, dum, dum........ wedding march music.
The conflicts of modern society and the bible. Who'd of thougt. I musn't be the the only one out there though??

Barina, why not get married?

OR not have penetrative sex? Most Catholics are highly skilled at orgasming without having penetrative sex, due to years of teenage practice

My mum and dad went out for 4 years before they got married and were virgins on their wedding night. My mum says they did everything but... thankfully she spared me the details

MP

Tight jeans, a g-string & lots of wriggling

So I'm told

I seem to remember starting a thread once called 50 Ways To Have Non-Penetrative Orgasms...

I'm not sure that anything but non-penetrative sex would be regareded as okay. I know Bill Clinton thinks oral sex doesn't count but I think the Vatican is more hardline.

My Dp wld kill me if he saw this entire thread. BUT after this long oral sex and whatnot get a bit boring, and most of the time r single sided. Sex is much more attractive!!

If it's single sided then he's crap in the sack

DO NOT GET MARRIED

Just spoken to Mumas she know about these things She says that as far as she knows there isn't any ban on oral sex but the man must not ejaculate as this is wasting the seed. Nothing about orgasms for women though so basically to do it 'the catholic way' there can be no penetration and no male orgasm but the women is free to have a good time

The wonders of a patriachal institution!

PMSL MP

OOhhh one sided that way then!!!!

Let him make you scream then roll over & go to sleep!! Just so he doesn't waste his seed

What?? That's helpful advice. No he's not crap in the sack. lol.
I meant it's usually one person at a time. I'm not gonig to go into details, but logistically we take turns. I orgasm plenty, it wld just be nice to do it in the conventional way, together!!

He's v.good in the sack actually. How rude. That's half the problem. If he was crap I cld forget about it and go to sleep!!

I'm not keen on the available contraception methods either. I'm doing it with this book by Toni Weschler which came highly recommended. I'm only begining at the moment so will let you know.

How about a 69???? That way you both get pleasure at the same time

And orgasms at the same time through penetration alone are extremely rare.....

So Dh tells me

On a serious level barina he needs to decide what he wants to do. If he wants to have sex with you then you need to decide on a form of contraception. I understand that he has issues with this but he need to decide what is more important to him and then just get on with it. The combined pill prevents fertilisation because it prevents you from ovulating. If you are worried about this then why don't you both go to your GP and explain what you need etc and let them guide you.

Barina - your post was one of the most interesting I've yet to read on MN because in a way, someone else's moral dilemma has beocme your problem. From a strict Catholic point of view - and I'm sure he knows it - he shouldn't be having sex. If he's married and wants not to start a family just yet he and his wife should practice NFP. The Church forbids anything else.

Personally, if I didn't believe that contraception was wrong - and I assume you don't - I would take steps to avoid an unplanned pregnancy. And I say this as someone who has yet to recover from a convent education!

Good luck with whatever you decide.

conventional way is much over-rated

develop some imaginative techniques now and it will serve you well when you are 90 and struggling with your bad hips

Seriously though, you should go on the combined pill. If you are having Guilty Sex then he won't stop to use a condom because it is too premeditated, so you will continue to have unprotected sex, and then you will get pregnant.

Find out if your local family planning clinic can teach you natural family planning this involves taking your tempreture, tracking mucus and feeling your cervix if you can reach it. This website can give you good information
www.fertilityuk.org
I stress you need to be taught this lots of people try and get the general gist of it but then end up pregnant if you do it correctly and are taught well it can be very successful, and then can be turned to help you concieve if and when you want to

OR get a persona machine, you wee on a little stick and a machine interprets the levels of hormones and you avoid having sex at your most fertile time of the month

I do think NLP is for you, but surely it wouldn't be terribly risky to have sex for the week after your period, for example, at least then you can see that in terms of simultaneous fun-having you're not really missing that much

It's hard to diagnose your dp's exact level of Catholicness about this. He's clearly not anti sex before marriage, but doesn't want any form of contraception with an abortion-like aspect (not criticising, just trying to understand). But presumably doesn't also like the non abortion-like methods such as condoms. Why not, exactly? If he's looking for the magic form of contraception that has no impact on the normal process of conception - well my love, aren't we all!

Snort NLP = neuro linguistic programming. NFP= Natural Family Planning. Needless to say I meant the latter

This has actually turned into a very humourous conversation with a load of complete strangers (lovely ones!!) All advice taken. That books looks interesting! Probably not just for me but for women who are sick of the pill, or concerned about hormone overload, let me know how it goes wld be very interested!

And yes 69 has been done, trust me we've done it all!
I think the one thing that is keeping me from taking the lead and putting my self back on contraceptives, is more about the fact that DP has trusted in me a situation that is very difficult, and i want to do my best to support it, and I know that if we are on a fool proof no baby plan then there is not much deterant!!
However I think I will have to take action somehow, as I'm not ready to share my body just yet. Not to mention the looks his mother wld give me!
So as long as there is an option which is relatively Catholic friendly, ie - no abortion effect, then we can combine our attempts at abstinence with the room for slip up need be!

Often if we do ravish each other in a moment of passion the withdrawal method is used - although this can't be overly successful as there is lot of catholic families out there with lots of babies???

Maybe I'll propose!

NLP - also snort. Would that mean talking about sex for hours on end?

Ah you sound like a lovely couple

I was wrong about the withdrawal method - lots of Catholics use it but strictly speaking the church don't approve because it wastes the seed.

read 'taking charge of your fertility' by Toni Weschler published by Quill (a definitive guide to Natural Birth control, pregnancy achievement and reproductive health)

it's excellent - i didn't ever want to be on the pill, brought up catholic but not practising. i think this form of birth control would be as catholic friendly as you can get and the most effective.