Wow, I have a lot to catch up on after my weekend away from the thread!
CookieWaffle how are you doing today? I hope you've let yourself have a good wallow and cry. Letting out your emotions is so important in order to feel better again, so don't brush aside how you're feeling or try to heal too quickly. Have you been doing anything nice for yourself or has anything nice happened to you over the last few days?
I think it's great that you're still looking for those silver linings. I'm sure you're going to get a sticky bean soon!
ChaosMoon I like what you said about going through loss making you an even more appreciative when you have a successful pregnancy.
Hi Eastend2015 I'm wishing you the very best of luck with this little lentil, as you call it! I'm sorry for your previous losses. I'm really pleased for you that you've managed to eliminate some of your stresses from your life. I'm looking at changing jobs too at the moment. Cutting contact with people (whether related to them or not) can be a really difficult decision, but well done you for your strength in identifying that this was such a source of stress and eliminating the toxicity from your life. You sound like a very brave person.
zarala hi! Welcome to the thread! I can imagine it's so scary being pregnant again after multiple losses, but I really hope everything goes well for this one. You've prepared a lot for it, so hopefully that preparation will pay off! Enjoy every moment for as long as it lasts if you can!
Spottyyellowdress it's great that you've been referred. At least this gives you some feeling of being able to do something about your situation. I hope they are able to help you, or if nothing is found, I hope this gives you peace of mind that it's just taking a while for your baby to be ready to be made. Having CPs is horrible and difficult to deal with. As soon as you see a positive test you have a baby inside you and losing that (three times) is definitely something you need to grieve. As Eastend2015 said, counselling can help, so do look in to it. And for now, I would recommend finding 'distractions' to help you feel like life isn't all about babies and loss and disappointment. What hobbies do you have? Or what would you like to do? Do you do things just for the fun of it? When was the last time you did something fun on a whim?
Hi again Frazzlerock I hope you had a wonderful holiday and feel relaxed.
You know something, the words you chose to describe your body really made me think. Your body is a bully?
Well you know why bullies do what they do?
They have low self esteem, feel powerless and want to feel powerful, are attention seeking because they crave love and don't feel they deserve it so want to be disapproved of...
I think it's time you gave your body a lot of TLC and started telling it what it's good at and why you love it! 
It might start being more cooperative...
Spottyyellowdress the swollen testicle could be anything! I know it's easier said than done, but try to put it from your mind until you get some results. Worrying about it won't do anything apart from make the wait more unpleasant. It sounds like it's extremely unlikely to be something like gonorrhoea as you were tested so recently! And a lot of infections such as that can be really easily treated these days anyway! And as you've been tested for things before, if it is anything which needs treating it doesn't sound like enough time would have elapsed for any longer-term complications to have been able to take effect, so try to relax.
I had a really lovely weekend. OH and I went shopping and I got a new outfit for my interview on Wednesday. I helped him chose some new glasses too. And then we went to my sister's house for a take-away in the evening and had lots of fun there.
Sunday we had a chilled day not doing much (I told Work I couldn't do an extra shift, so was selfishly putting myself first... felt a little bit bad, but actually I really needed two days off in a row after such a horrible week at work!) Did some more knitting AND OH and I DTD on Saturday AND Sunday... Doesn't sound anything much, but we haven't DTD two days in a row for years! Haha! I think I'm in my fertile period at the moment, if I ovulate, so feeling positive about my chances. However, not getting my hopes up either as the stress I've been under recently may have had an affect on my cycle as I suspect it did last month.
Today's quote for a few of you that I think may need it:
"You don't have to control your thoughts. You just have to stop letting them control you." Dan Millman
Notice the thoughts you don't want to be having today/tomorrow/this week and then let them drift away while you think of something else you would rather listen to.