The Good, The Bad and The Yams!

[LookingAtTheStars89]

CALLING ALL YAMMER'S!

Yammer rules:

A safe place for those of you who have been trying to conceive for 6+ months and even yams aren’t helping. Come and have a good ol’ bitch and a moan without judgement. Please read the rules before posting!

The Yam Commandments are as follows;

• Thou shalt not arrive one day and post BFP next day

• Thou shalt not give advice to others when TTC for one month only

• Thou shalt not participate in one-up-manship and realise TTC is shit for everyone in different ways

• Thou shall allow posters to be fucked off with the world and everything in it at regular points in the month

• Thou shalt not be offended by strong language

• Thou shalt not tell everyone to eat yams

• Thou shall accept being called a muppet for testing at 7dpo at 9pm at night

And most importantly...

• Thou shalt not symptom spot during the two week wait and must be prepared for a telling off if you do so.

NEW RULE ALERT!

-Thou shalt not post pictures of positive pregnancy tests. We will be delighted to hear about it but no photos, please and thank you

It wasn't meant to be.

I got a call from the fertility clinic today to say my BHCG has barely risen instead of doubling. I'm probably going to lose this baby. It's just a matter of when.

Oh god @dino I’m so sorry to hear that. Is it definite?

So, so sorry to read that @BGDino

It's not definite but the odds aren't on our side.

And just to make it suck a little bit more, my husband doesn't come off night shift until Thursday morning and my parents are in Hong Kong dealing with my grandfather's passing.

The only reason I'm not spending the night alone is because hubby forgot his phone tonight so I went clear across the city in an Uber to deliver it, and now I'm hiding in the registrars' on call room for the night instead of going home to an empty flat. (I'm hiding because I don't work at this hospital!)

Crossing my fingers that someone on this thread has better luck than me.

@BGDino oh hun sending so many hugs

@BGdino thinking of you, hoping your evening of hiding out goes quickly(!)

it's the waiting for everything that does my head in (Af, then Ov, then LP... Feels like a never ending loop, of testing trying to read body signs for "the window" and hoping lady luck is on side)

Have any of you concentrated on losing weight to help? I'm quite a high bmi (much higher after trying for a few years, with heart ache and comfort eating) know if I go to the Dr to have an IVF convo that will be a barrier (despite being near 35, with no children)..

We've been rigidly taking prenatal vits, and tried the preseed lube this month too (desperate times.. Was super weird to do tmi I knoooo)

We've been trying for so long I just don't know what else is in my gift to do. I know the weight thing is so important, I just feel like such a failure. fp is due sat, I've already blitzed thru 3 hpts and bfn.

Hope you are doing ok today BGDino and managed to hide out ok - I have been thinking of you. When I had my m/c in Feb, I had the two HCGs and they went up from 1100 to about 1400 in 48 hours and they said it wasn't inevitable but likely. The waiting was horrendous, much worse than previous occasions where I didn't realise until the bleeding. Just wanted to send some empathy.

@Symptomspotter well I've been trying to loose weight but I agree everything is just a vicious cycle, that with long term ttc, loving food (and wine) and hormones it is so hard. I've been trying the keto diet which is ok and I've lost a few pounds doing that last month so fingers crossed for this month who knows!?

Im actually majorly down today, work is kicking off again, with problems and stress constantly which is not helping me ttc and I know it effects me every month, I'm back at a point of having no idea forward yet again. Ive looked for a new job but nothing is coming up in my area and "carrying on" as dp puts it is not an option. Do any of you ladies have any tips? X

I have really irregular periods, this cycle I'm currently on day 40 something, last month was somewhat regular around 34 days. month before was 93 days.. I went to my gp several months ago during a particularly emotional 120+ day cycle and she was awful, reduced me to tears saying that I should 'go back in 5 years if I want to talk about starting a family' and refused to do anything to help me, which is beyond inappropriate in general and plus I'm 23 I'm hardly 16. I'm I've been to upset to go back to the doctors since.

I've recently moved and registered with a new gp. Rang up this morning and just said I know I shouldn't be calling for help and explained and she was in shock. Said of course I should be calling. Cycles like mine need to be investigated regardless of whether I'm TTC and she can see on my records I first mentioned being TTC 15 months ago, and then again 10 months and again 7 months ago (My cycles make me give up every now and then again, they're so erratic I can't track them and I just get sad and convince myself I'm infertile) but anyway this lovely GP has said it's time to get things in motion so I finally feel like I have a glimmer of hope 

Hope you're all doing ok and best of luck @BGDino wishing you a positive outcome.

@BGDino i am so so sorry. You poor thing.

So i dunno what to do. Ive got a hen do to go to tomorrow and FP is due either sunday or monday.

Gonna take a test tomorrow morning. If it's negative then i guess i can drink... but worried about false negatives and all that.

Drink til it’s pink @pink! Even if it’s a false negative it would be so early you’d be fine- something about not yet sharing bloods. Can’t remember the details sorry! 🤞 it’s a +

@maddiie I’m so pleased you’ve got a better GP- totally better to try and see what’s going on withcycles like that regardless of TTC. What a horror previous GP was!

Wish I had some advice for you @owl. Finding something else to distract me has been helpful- like eating healthy (although I’m not losing weight) yoga and trying to be social etc so I don’t become obsessed with TTC.
That said our funding came through for ivf today and I was crying in the loo as I read the email!

Omg @LexieJean that's amazing news!

Well I feel more in control this month, I've gone back to using opks and I feel better for doing "something" if that makes sense. I also realised i haven't been taking folic acid for 3 months! so started taking again today

Anyone got any tips at all that they can think of, I haven't ordered the lube yet just plan on jumping on dp as much as possible. I think my egg won't last long and or dp must have an issue. Still working on dp

@Owlpatrol glad you're feeling a bit more in control. I'm afraid I haven't got any tips that have worked for me but vits and jumping on your dp at the appropriate time sound sensible 😉

I'm forced to take this cycle off due to hycosy test which is booked in for cd23. Rather frustrating. Currently on cd4 so a while to wait yet. We have nhs infertility appmt due 17th Sept too.

@LexieJean how are you feeling about the ivf funding coming through? Do you know when it might start?

@LexieJean that's brilliant news! Do you have a time frame now? It must be such a weight of your shoulders knowing you don't have to find the cash yourselves.

@books and @si1ver thank you. Yes am relieved but also petrified of all the drugs 😬 not sure when we’ll start- have appointment at end Sept but am away in October so I guess it will depend on cycles etc. Will keep you updated!
How’s your pg going @si1ver?

Glad you’re feeling some control @owl.

Well.. BFN.. lets get plastered! Lol (not sure why i hoped it would be our month.. it was never going to be our month this cycle!)

Don't be scared of the drugs @LexieJean, it's tough, but do-able. I had a melt down mid cycle when I wished I hadn't started, but the memory fades fast. You just need to keep going.

Pregnancy is going well so far. 19 weeks in and no major issues.

Thanks @si1ver 😊

I'm sorry about the bfn @pinkemi I find even if I expect it they still aren't any easier to deal with. I hope you have a really fun hen weekend enjoying yourself and not thinking about ttc. You deserve fun times, as do we all.

I've just finished a delicious glass of wine whilst watching the netflix docu One More Shot. It made me cry quite a lot but I do recommend it. I'm finding the ivf podcasts and documentaries are helping me come to terms with what feels like quite a daunting process but one my dh and I are increasingly looking like we'll be going through.

Forgot to say @maddiie I'm really glad you've switched gp and are getting somewhere with the new one. Well done for pushing it and good luck!

(Crossing fingers the spacing on my phone app worked this time, apols if a big jumbled mess!)

So glad you found your new GP @maddiie she sounds lovely.

@LexieJean that’s great news!

@Pinkemi have a drink for me!

So my repeat bloods yesterday showed my HCG went from 152 on Monday to 930. Enough of a rise for my fertility specialist to order more bloods on Monday and an early ultrasound on Wednesday. Apparently the 3 options are a) impending miscarriage; b) ectopic pregnancy; c) a normal pregnancy which happens to be one of the 15% with a low, slow HCG. I’ve stopped getting morning sickness though so I’m not optimistic about it being c).

As if we didn’t have enough to be getting on with DH got diagnosed with scabies by his GP, which he probably caught from a hospital patient. So we’ve both had to be covered head to toe in permethrin cream and it feels like we have never ending laundry... have counted 4 laundry baskets’ worth. Though our laundry is down 3 flights of stairs and I’m not supposed to carry heavy stuff (?) so it’s not my problem

Hoping next weeks is better!!!

BGDino forgive me if I'm clutching at straws for you but that seems like excellent doubling time to me? I was told the actual volume was unimportant as this stage, just doubling time which should be 48-72 hours which that defo is. I'll keep everything tightly crossed for you.

Oh @dino what a week for you! Sending you special yammer hugs and keeping everything crossed 🤞

Thought AF turned up yesterday as when I wiped there was some pinkish blood. Next time I went to the loo wiped again there was brown blood and nothing since? Does this sound normal to anyone or have my periods become even more ridiculous than they already were..

Hoping that you are part of the 15% @BGDino got everything crossed for you xx

@maddiie that is fairly normal for me. I tend to get on/off spotting for a few days before period arrives properly. Hopefully it is better news for you but I would wait and see what the next few days brings.

Thanks @Booksandbaths1 it literally lasted 2 hours and was only pink and brown. I fell victim to google last night just searching "pink brown blood when I wipe only lasted hours' and it came straight up with loads of links to implantation bleeding. I'm awful at convincing myself I have pregnancy symptoms but that's not something I even knew about. Trying to not get my hopes up