The Good, The Bad and The Yams!

[LookingAtTheStars89]

CALLING ALL YAMMER'S!

Yammer rules:

A safe place for those of you who have been trying to conceive for 6+ months and even yams aren’t helping. Come and have a good ol’ bitch and a moan without judgement. Please read the rules before posting!

The Yam Commandments are as follows;

• Thou shalt not arrive one day and post BFP next day

• Thou shalt not give advice to others when TTC for one month only

• Thou shalt not participate in one-up-manship and realise TTC is shit for everyone in different ways

• Thou shall allow posters to be fucked off with the world and everything in it at regular points in the month

• Thou shalt not be offended by strong language

• Thou shalt not tell everyone to eat yams

• Thou shall accept being called a muppet for testing at 7dpo at 9pm at night

And most importantly...

• Thou shalt not symptom spot during the two week wait and must be prepared for a telling off if you do so.

NEW RULE ALERT!

-Thou shalt not post pictures of positive pregnancy tests. We will be delighted to hear about it but no photos, please and thank you

Horribleeeeee period pain this morning. To the point I couldn't feed the dogs and had to crawl into a bath so hot I was dripping with sweat after just a couple of mins. Thank goodness am on annual leave this week. I had really bad periods after the termination five years ago and when I went back on the pill they were still bad but eventually (maybe after a couple of years) eased up a bit. This is the first time I've had one this bad again in a few years I think. Hoping it's a weird blip. Does anyone else ever get a really bad period once in a while? Never know how much pain is normal either, seems to vary so much from person to person.

That’s crap @orca especially using up your annual leave! I can’t help I’m aftaid, my pain is bearable. It’s impossible to gauge against others though. Hope you get some relief.

Sorry about the bfn @owl

I feel like there’s no end of TTC in sight ! All my holiday positivity has evaporated!

@OrcinusOrca if the pain is preventing you from carrying on with normal activities then I would get it checked out.

Uuuuuuggggghhhhhh just seen pictures of ex boyfriend’s partner and it looks like she’s pregnant with number two. I know he’s a twat but it still makes me feel a bit shit.

Sorry you’re in so much pain orcinus, hope it gets better soon.

Does anyone have any insight? I'm not symptom spotting as such but for the last 3 days I've been getting cramps, but not like fp cramps, more like pinching/stabbing feelings in that area. I'm around 4-8dpo (strong positive OPK 8 days ago and a slight temp shift 4 days ago - so may not have even ovulated tbh!) CD23 (cycles lengths vary from 30-37 days)
Just curious as I've never had these pains before.
Any help, grateful appreciated

@booksandbaths1 Thanks for tip, I will as doctor they can only say i have to wait.
@OrcinusOrca I get bad pains, can end up in bed with a hot water bottle until painkillers kick in. I agree though if even strong painkillers aren't giving you relief you should have it checked.

DH had a breakdown last night, he was certain this would only take a few months and with my fp being so late he had really got his hopes up. He also had a medical to do with work and he and high blood pressure and nurse told him he had to lose weight (which he was already doing) but she was so nasty about it, its totally knocked him. Think its worse seeing him so upset about it all.

@SparkwoodAnd21 urgh that sucks. Sorry you're feeling crap.

@Mellp I had those last cycle. I wouldn't read too much into it as it's horrible but normal either way.

@Countrygirl94 I'm sorry to hear you OH is also finding it tough. Work medical can be brutal. I hope he's not stressing about it being in him, some guys do find it so emasculating.

Hi All.. I had a very productive weekend keeping myself busy to try and forget about TTC for once. (It sorta worked... but only just. lol)

I think it helped that I have been reading this book:

www.amazon.co.uk/Your-Mind-Fertility-Friendly-Emotions-Fertility/dp/1784624640/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=mind+fertility+friendly&tag=mumsnetforum-21&ie=UTF8&qid=1529336095&sr=8-1

I'm going to try and start being positive about this TTC journey, instead of negative all the time. :-/ I think it might be easier said then done. ha!

That looks good @pinkemi. Although not one for the train! 😆

Sounds much like the advice my accupuncturist has been telling me and helping me work towards. It is easier said than done but I think I have more positive than negative days now so that’s an improvement!

@LexieJean no not one for the train.. unless your extremely open about these sort of things. Haha

My accupuncturist and my reflexologist have also been trying to drum this thought pattern into me for months.. but i always just shrugged them off. I guess i needed to read it for it to sink in.

Feeling positive today though.. just been stuck in a traffic jam for about 15mins. Instead of cursing about it.. i was thankful for the time to be able to listen to my tunes. :-) also just saw 3 magpies and then a single.. so i just counted them all together to make 4 for a boy!

It is my mission to be positive for the whole week. Ill let you know how i get on.

Good luck @pinkemi!

@Pinkemi ooh yes let us know how you get on I need whatever you're having big time!

One piece of good news, my specialist called me yesterday and turns out I AM immune to rubella (just!), the lab we used had changed their reference ranges recently and he didn’t realise. Hubby has his SA today, and I’ve been started on thyroxine 50mcg daily as my TSH is a bit too high for someone who wants to conceive (apparently >2.5 increases your risk of miscarriage). So we’re moving, slowly.

@OrcinusOrca - I think that with the B vitamins you generally need to increase them all together, rather than just increasing one, because it can put them out of balance? I think they need to be in balance for them to absorb properly if I remember rightly. It’s not dangerous or anything, and obviously if you were low in just b6, you’d just take b6 - but if you are taking it for something else I think that’s where you need the complex. I think it still can take a couple of months to affect your cycle, even though it is absorbed quickly, it’s then got to help strengthen the corpus luteum (I think!)

@BGDino - good news about the rubella! Hope your dh ‘s SA is ok

@Pinkemi - sounds like a good read. Remember to bring any little helpful tips back to us! I feel like we all could need it....

@Countrygirl94 - sorry for your Dh. Mine was the same even though I had tried to prepare him that it takes some people a year. That now seems a bit optimistic....And that’s awful about his medical, poor guy.....

@SparkwoodAnd21 - sorry that’s the worse kind of baby bomb. Just keep reminding yourself that he being pregnant doesn’t mean you won’t be

So when our Gp said she’d refer us she actually didn’t... Apparently she was waiting to speak to Dh about his results, but they didn’t tell us that. Also, we got a print out of the results and it was similar to before so Dh said he didn’t need to speak with a dr about it. She did apologise and said she would do it now.... So frustrating!

@Rubberduckies urrgh that’s so frustrating! Especially when the process already feels like it’s long drawn out and complex! How long will it take for the referral to go through?

@hidcat I think your right about him feeling slightly emasculated.

@rubberduckies I thought I had prepared him too I think to begin with he thought I was just being pessimistic. How annoying about your referral!

Question for anyone that does tempting, I'm attempting it this cycle. DH is up at 5am whereas I half open an eye then and again when he leaves at 6 go back to sleep and don't actually get up till 7. So which of these time should i be taking my temp?

@Countrygirl94 I'd do it when your OH gets up at 5 as you're coming off the best block of sleep. My thermometer stores the reading so I can recall it later and don't have to worry about typing into my phone there and then.

Hi ladies bfn for me this morning and some brown spotting so fully expecting af this week. Been speaking to dp because I need to make some decisions around my job ttc and way forward but he just wants to carry on however I need to know I'm doing something he also needs to get his sperm analysis done. I need a holiday

Well, it definitely wasn’t implantation bleeding - negative test just now. TBH I knew the odds of it being implantation bleeding were hilariously low but I had to check... just in case. Feeling pretty negative about the whole TTC thing as one of the websites I went on quoted a 50% success rate for one IVF cycle in women

That’s frustrating @owl - it took well over a year for my OH to contemplate that we might need an alternative plan. I think the school sex Ed had him convinced it would only take one time. I wish!! I still say focus on your job options, think about making a change. Don’t let TTC hold you back. I’ve just started my new job and I can’t believe I stayed at the old place so long ‘in case I get pg’.

Sorry about the bfn @dino. The odds are terrible, as I turn 36 in a few months I’m pretending not to know how low the success rates are. But then a natural conception chance is something crazy low like 15%!! 🤦‍♀️

@BGDino - I wish they made it clear how long everything takes, because I just have no idea. Dr said she’d ask them to push it through quicker as we’d been waiting but who knows how long that might be. I always just thought that if we were unlucky enough for it to take a year, we’d get referred. When actually we went to Gp for hormonal bloods which took a few months to get the right day. When that was done they wanted a SA, when that came back they wanted us to wait 3 months for another SA, then ultrasounds.... I get the logic of doing tests first, but I wish they’d said from the beginning - this will take 6 months

@Countrygirl94 - My Dh has said he feels very guilty, very responsible and less of a man. He also thought I was just being pessimistic......I know i would feel the same if it was me but it’s hard to know what to do or say.... I agree with doing your temp the first time you wake up when your husband gets up at 5 if you can.

Sorry about the bfns :(

I always think that with the success rates, the statistics around natural pregnancy are pretty low, and people get pregnant all the time! The idea of needing several cycles of IVF is pretty terrifying though.....

@Owlpatrol sorry about your bfn but I agree with others I would change jobs if it's making you miserable, ttc is hard enough without also hating work.

@BGDino sorry about bfn, stats I find are just a cruel thing, there are so many variables that can affect them that really I don't find they worth anything.

@Rubberduckies @HidCat I shall do my temp at 5. Thanks for advice.

DH's job away has been pushed back so this month won't be a lost cycle now.

@Owlpatrol I'm changing jobs to a place that's less stressful fwiw... working through my 4 weeks notice now

@Countrygirl94 that's a relief about your DH's work schedule will cross all my crossables for you.

@BGDino ooh that's sounds promising good luck! And please report back!

@Owlpatrol I've been thinking about changing jobs for a while and putting it off because of TTC and potential maternity pay. But nothing's happening wombwise so I've just gone for it!

@BGDino Congratulations on the new job! I've quit mine too as the stress was getting too much.