I yam what I yam

[Bubblegum89]

Thread 6... 😑

A safe place for those of you who have been trying to conceive for 6+ months and even yams aren’t helping. Come and have a good ol’ bitch and a moan without judgement. Please read the rules before posting!

The Yam Commandments are as follows;

• Thou shalt not arrive one day and post BFP next day

• Thou shalt not give advice to others when TTC for one month only

• Thou shalt not participate in one-up-manship and realise TTC is shit for everyone in different ways

• Thou shall allow posters to be fucked off with the world and everything in it at regular points in the month

• Thou shalt not be offended by strong language

• Thou shalt not tell everyone to eat yams

• Thou shall accept being called a muppet for testing at 7dpo at 9pm at night

And most importantly...

• Thou shalt not symptom spot during the two week wait and must be prepared for a telling off if you do so.

NEW RULE ALERT!

-Thou shalt not post pictures of positive pregnancy tests. We will be delighted to hear about it but no photos, please and thank you

@Bubblegum89 I’m sorry you are having a shit time. Everyone I know seems to be pregnant too, or have a newborn. I’ve spent half of the last 8 months pregnant and have nothing to show for it which makes me so angry at times. I think forgetting timings and all for a month might help (not to conceive but just for your mental health!). Although if you are like me you’ll know anyway. I don’t need to use opks as I know the moment I’m ovulating. Obsessed with my temp chart this month to take away my sadness about not TTC.

@LookingAtTheStars89 1000 is tough! I find 1200 allows me 3 meals without feeling too deprived. I need to lose a lot at the moment. At least 3 stone I think. Have been comfort eating terribly the last few months and it really shows.

@Paranormalbouquet. Yeah I am in the same boat regards the amount I could do with losing. My GP told me that every single lb lost with PCOS can make a massive difference so I'm keeping that as my focal point. I've reasoned with myself that if I keep calories low during the week then I can have a little treat at the weekend lol.

@LookingAtTheStars89 it really does make a difference with PCOS. As does exercise even in the absence of weight loss.

I know I’ll find surgery easier if I lose weight. And hopefully pregnancy too if I can ever get past 12 weeks!

@SparkwoodAnd21 I am still feeling pretty crap to be honest! (Not sure if you are asking me or the other person with pink at the start of their name.. so ill answer anyway. haha)

@bubblegum89 man.. that is a lot of babies in your life! Im sorry your feeling a bit down... (HUGS)

@Paranormalbouquet and @LookingAtTheStars89: Great admiration for you guys! I tried to cut out sugar, dairy and gluten and carbs.. but failed after a few months! Really need to drop 3 stone at least before I can go for IVF with the NHS.. Not yet considering it.. but would like to lose weight anyway. I feel so fat and ugly at the moment! I keep trying to stick to 1,200 but i find it so hard. How do you guys stop bordem or stress eating? I'm having a very emotional time at work at the moment which doesn't help this.. or my mood either come to think of it!

So...

Had a small bit of blood whilst doing my internal checks today.. burst into tears thinking that is it.. FP is on its way! (It's due today!) But 4 hours later.. nothing.. I did another internal check about an hour ago and still nothing.. very confused right now.

Trying to not hope that this means something else.. as im sure FP is on its way. My BBT dropped this morning for the second day in the row.. so i know its on its way.

This TTC lark is bull crap.. sorry but it really is!

@bubblegum89 all I'd say is 1 in 7 couples are up at assisted conception and 1 in 10 require treatment of some sort. People lie and or fluff the truth. If anyone asks me if I am TTC i say 'oh not yet maybe at the end of this year'. Little do they know this is month 20 and I'm waiting for our IVF apointment. I have seen a close friend start ttc then have 3 rounds of ivf fail. She had been very open from the begining and only 25 when her journey started. I remember her telling me about how people had started treating her differently and avoiding certain topics etc etc. So when I started ttc I told no one. I know this maybe doesn't help, but I think there are less 'suprise babies' than people let on. Average length of time for a 30 year old to fall pregnant is like 9 months.

Jaysus @Bubblegum89 I'm screaming in frustration for you. Can't imagine how hard it must be to be surrounded by all that.

Anyone know how @LimpLettice Is?? Follow up scan tomorrow?

hiiii!!! ovulated Sunday n feel soooooo tired!!! am i pregnent?!!!!

Oops, forgot the "lol"!

I'm still lurking away Wonky, I haven't gone anywhere. Well remembered about tomorrow. It's bloody terrifying stuff but just have to keep buggering on and see what happens. Dad has an oncology appointment and dd has dental surgery all in the same day, so I have no time to dwell over much which may not be a bad thing. Bloody mindfuck though.

Pinkemi I really hope fp stays away 🙏

I'm missing loads of people out here, sorry. But Bubblegum big massive hugs to you. I'm so sorry you're having such a shitty time lovely. You deserve better, and it's rotten that there's no rhyme nor reason as to why.

So glad other folk are surrounded by a gazillion pregnancies too - I’ve two close friends about to pop, a best friend who’s honeymoon baby is due shortly, a family christening for their baby next month (they stole ‘my’ name too!) and a friend and cousin both announced pregnancies over the weekend....... it’s getting harder and harder to handle.
Any tips (except chocolate) as to how I can keep myself sane??!

@Pinkemi I’ve been back on the wagon for 2 whole days so I don’t think I deserve much admiration just yet! Did go to the gym at lunchtime though.

@Bubblegum89 I agree with @catherine1988- lots of people are not open about trying. I certainly am not, I pretend I’m delighted having an only child etc. I can’t bear the sympathetic nods I get otherwise.

@SoozC hun, you should defiantly test, it’s a sign. (Spelling mistakes intended!).

@Teachermummy83 if it makes you feel better there are 2 people I am forced to see regularly with babies due on my due date for my last miscarriage. One at work and one girl who I’m bridesmaid with. 3 weeks after her baby is due.

Due date for miscarriage number 2 is coming up soon and I won’t be pregnant by then as having surgery 2 weeks beforehand. I think I’ll crack up.

I wish that was the case catherine these are all people who have only been in relationships for a few months (some aren’t even in a relationship) all of the ones who are on baby 3 or 4 are having them with new partners 🙄

But thanks ladies. I’m eating sweets to try and make myself feel better. Period will be here on Monday(ish) so I’m expecting more unplanned pregnancy announcements then

Sooz OMG u should totally do a test. When I got pregnint with my 7th, I new I was pregnint before I even ovulated cuz I could smell baked beans cooking on the hob n I wasn’t even in the kitchen. Baby dust to u 💕💕💕💕💕

@Bubblegum89. Mr Looking must think I'm a nut case, I'm sat here laughing at your post.

@Bubblegum89. cries I miss sweets!

@Pinkemi. You can admire me all you like! Until about three weeks ago I was a fully fledged and totally addicted member of the chocolate club! My portion sizes were probably a little too generous too But I'm getting there, I'm not going to lie, for the first week I wanted to tear my hair out and I'm not even being melodramatic lol. Once you get over the first week hurdle it gets a bit easier. :-) I can't really go full force with exercise as I have a narrow airway (I was born with it) so I get out of breath really easily :-(

Omg Huns, @Bubblegum89 is totes right!!! With my 5th I culd bearly keep mi eyes open and my nips kept tingling. I fort it might be the deep heat I rubbed on them, turns out I was defiantly knocked up.

God had answered ur prayers sweet child, u have been blessed by the Lord, He has give u a baby, only God. Nobody else. Only God has done this for u coz u r his child n he loves u. Amen hallelujah praise the Lord ❤️

@bubblegum89 damn their fertile loins... I remember the days when I believed sex lead to pregnancy 🍆

But seriously people do tell lies

They do catherine but these people aren’t, they have all been with their partners less than 6 months so definitely no infertility struggles there. One even got pregnant by accident within a week of seeing someone and he hadn’t even met her other two children yet lol

I do know a few married couples who have had babies in the last few years and I’ve since found out they’ve had struggles. So they didn’t necessarily lie but they just didn’t broadcast it. I feel kind of sad that people who do actually have fertility issues feel they have to lie about it :(

Thought I was on the wrong thread for a minute when catching up!

@bubble I’m another one who lies about long term TTC. No one would ever know how broken I am inside about DD being an only. It’s shit so many people just look at a penis at get pregnant.

@limp good luck today, keeping everything crossed for you.

Another TTC withholder here too! Sorry to hear you're all struggling with babies around you too - DH'S 2 cousins who we see a lot both had babies before Xmas and now 2 work colleagues are pregnant too.

I'm also trying to lose weight to help with my pcos - managed to lose 2 stone since June - I've put half back on so need to lose another 3 and a half now. In the midst of a very drawn out stressy house move so it's on the back burner as cupboards are empty and half my stuff is in boxes so living off of junk really. Hopefully will be in next week so can get back on the wagon!

BFN at 11dpo at this end (bringing Cycle 20 to a close) so I’m definitely out again. The joys of secondary infertility! Unless I ovulate later than usual, I may well end up missing next cycle as I have a HyCoSy on day 13... Now hurtling beyond the 3 year gap (which is ironic as when we started ttc, I genuinely thought we’d end up with 2 under 2!) The last of the 5 other couples in my NCT group are due to have their second baby any day now (they got pregnant in the first month of trying, obvs!)

DH got his DNA fragmentation results back last month and they were fairly poor (consistent with his poor morphology results). This doesn’t bode brilliantly for IVF (even with ICSI) but may well explain why we’ve had no luck so far (and possibly the cp and ectopic I experienced whilst ttc #1). He’s had some additional tests to see if we can identify a treatable underlying cause, and we should get the results at the end of the month. He’s also totally upped the ante on the diet and not drinking front (slashing meat and eating loads of superfoods, so I’m really hoping this will reap some rewards).

I’ve decided that I’m so used to disappointment now that we need to throw a housemove into the mix, so having moved jobs last year, my 2018 distraction technique is likely to be a house move. The decluttering commences this weekend, and on a positive note, at this rate, even if the house move takes an age, it looks highly unlikely as though I’ll end up moving pregnant...

Just to add that I’m a massive oversharer on the fertility front, so literally everyone (whether solicited or not) gets to hear about it!

What I have discovered is that a lot of others do struggle, but it is not always linear. To those of you ttc#1 who are struggling, the only ray of hope I can give you is that I would need more than one hand to count the number of couples I know well who took an age to #ttc1 only to find that DC2 arrived very quickly thereafter.

Good luck today Limp

Also, thanks everyone for making me laugh in the office this morning reading all your obvious reasons why you're all up-duffed!