When the going gets tough, the tough get Yams

[SoozC]

Thread five!

A safe place for those of you who have been trying to conceive for 6+ months and even yams aren’t helping. Come and have a good ol’ bitch and a moan without judgement.

The Yam Commandments are as follows;

• Thou shalt not arrive one day and post BFP next day

• Thou shalt not give advice to others when TTC for one month only

• Thou shalt not participate in one-up-manship and realise TTC is shit for everyone in different ways

• Thou shall allow posters to be fucked off with the world and everything in it at regular points in the month

• Thou shalt not be offended by strong language

• Thou shalt not tell everyone to eat yams

• Thou shall accept being called a muppet for testing at 7dpo at 9pm at night

And most importantly...

• Thou shalt not symptom spot during the two week wait and must be prepared for a telling off if you do so.

BFP bloody autocorrect!

Oh god it hadn’t crossed my mind about March= last chance for 2018. How fu!*%ing depressing.
And my feet are cold. Which means my uterus is probably cold too (I mean most of me is cold in this weather!) This is going to be a long 2WW

I for one am wishing you all Christmas babies

Still a cycle to go before a Xmas baby. Going to snuggle up tonight as my evening class has been cancelled due to snow, just in time for fw! I even bought some nice lingerie that I'm going to surprise DH with.

Which reminds me, I need to go drink some water; I find it hard to want to drink cold water from the tap when it's -3 outside! But I did promise myself I would drink more water this cycle to see if it helps.

I wish it was coffee that aids fertility.

@sooz can you manage hot water? I’ve totally gotten into it now (coffee just once a week 😭) and it’s very warming

You mean...hot water...with... no coffee?!?!

I'm trying very hard to keep a smile plastered on my face. DH came home early today to tell me that his GP had told him that his results are abnormal. He didn't say much else but he's booked him an appointment for Monday.

I know it may not be the end if the world but I feel gutted. My Mum was less than helpful when I told her, she said, and I quote "Oh well, don't make him feel bad just tell him you'll draw a line under it and be done" and what's worse is that DH said "we won't make any decisions until monday" I thought, what the heck is that meant to mean?!

What about what I want and feel in this scenario? I'm not ready to give up on having another baby. How are you just meant to "draw and line and move on" Like Oh well, I desperately want this baby but maybe a hobby will fill the gap?? I can't think like that I'm not a bloody robot!

@LookingAtTheStars89 maybe be doesn't want to talk about sperm donation until Monday. Try and stay positive lovely, there are option still.

I realise that's bugger all use really and I don't mean that sperm donation is the only option.

Have a large glass of wine and a manly awkward pat on the shoulder.

@looking that can’t have been easy for him to hear. He may just need some time to adjust and maybe look up alternatives. IUI can help with sperm related issues depending on the abnormality. Has he been taking vitamins? Wearing loose boxers etc?

Looking, sending you hugs x

Sorry, I didn't mean to come across as a massive knob and I didnt when he told me. I told him I loved him and that it would be ok. I think to be honest he had just assumed there was an issue with me.

He takes vitamins. He wears briefs. He's kind of against changing his lifestyle for ttc, he hates it that I've suggested knocking caffeine and alcohol on the head. He's overweight too.

I wouldn't suggest sperm donors for fear of upsetting him but I had hoped that should there be a problem then we could go down the medically assisted route.

Sorry again if you think I'm being harsh. I just feel a bit lost.

You have not come across as a knob! At all. You sound like someone who is finding ttc hard and feels upset when another obstacle is put in your way. Have a big hug from me, wish I could do more! x

@SoozC. Thank you for being kind x x

@lookingatthestars massive hugs will he let you go with him to find out what the options are. To be honest you can't make any decisions until you both know what the situation is and what the treatment options are. At least knowing where the problem lies means you can start to get help with it.

I suspect our problems might be at DHs end due to his medical problems and medications. My GP seemed to think getting him tested would be the best place to start investigations too.

@pinkdonkey. DH has sleep apnea so he's stopping breathing loads during the night, even worse if he decides to snooze off on the couch. I didn't think too much of it until I mentioned it to my GP and he said that he needed to have an S.A.

He won't let me go with him to his appointment so I'm hoping that he will ask questions. Do you think it would be unreasonable of me to ask DH to ask certain questions? I'm worried he's going to go in there and the DR will say "Well Mr X it's like this" and DH will say "Ok thanks doc" :-/

looking sorry, that’s crap :( on a kind of positive note, at least you now have a starting point to getting the ball rolling. It’s possible that it’s something that can be sorted with dietary/lifestyle changes. Hopefully the dr can give him some good advice. And tbh you can tell him what questions to ask but there’s no guarantee he will ask them, men seem to be reluctant to discuss their semen with doctors lol not like us women who whack our vaginas out in front of a doctor without even thinking. Fingers crossed you get some positive news!

@Bubblegum89. Ha Ha yeah! Many Many Drs and nurses have seen my chamber of secrets over the years - Well actually not so secret lol. I sit down at the Drs and I'm like "WELL doc, it looks like that, feels like this and makes this sound". DH reckons I'm far too liberal sometimes but you have to be to get answers!

I know, I wish they didn't have such a hang up about it. I said to DH that I don't want him to think things like that and its not what's in his balls that makes him a man.

@DoAsDreamersDo sorry to hear AF has arrived for you!

Had another ultrasound today and got the results of my blood test. Apparently one of my throid hormones is slightly too low, so I'm to take tablets to correct it, and the doctor wants me in for regular ultrasounds this cycle to make sure I'm ovulating. This is all making me feel really hopeful, but we'll see what happens.

I feel like I'm cramping. FFS, I haven't even ov'd yet!! I thought last cycle was a good clear out and now back to normal? I cramped slightly almost every day between ov and af last time. Argh.

Fingers crossed, Jaggy!

@SoozC sorry to hear about the regular cramping. Its like our bodies never want us to forget we are TTC. I used to have really easy symptom free periods, but genuinely the first month I started TTC I started to get every symptom in the book 😭😂

@JaggyJobby. That's really good. I wish my Dr offered that. My day 21 was kind of inconclusive as I don't know what dpo it was and ended up being in the borderline category.

@SoozC. I swear I'm broken lol I never get any kind of cramping or boob pain! No even during or before AF! The only thing I get during AF is that my lady garden feels almost heavy and achey.

No idea what my cycle this month us dojng. No ewcm yet although I'm only on cd9 so still plenty of time yet. I was supposed to be having a pelvic ultrasound tomorrow but it got cancelled due to the weather :-(

@looking you didn’t come across as harsh or a knob! He seemed quite dismissive from what you’ve said and I was hoping it’s just because he was feeling a bit bruised. It’s rubbish he won’t let you go with him to the Dr. Can you talk to him about how much you need to be a team on this? TTC is hard enough without needing the extra stress and worry of not really knowing what’s going on. Men are such ostriches about anything medical!

Weirdest brag ever but went to the toilet this morning and had loads of ewcm. Since starting ttc, it went awol. I’ve always had it before ttc but in the last 18 months, all I’ve had is very watery cm (which I’m still getting and I know that’s fertile as well) except for one time on about month 10 where I had a little bit of cloudy ewcm. I thought I had a bit last week but it wasn’t, was just “remains” lol. Only difference is, this morning there was a) lots of it and b) it was completely clear unlike last time. Honestly I spent about 5 minutes looking at it with a huge smile on my face. That’s how I knew I’d reached peak crazy person.

Is this a good sign maybe? Not for being preggo obviously but for fertility? Like, ewcm is the peak fertile cm right? Could this be to do with my HyCoSy? Don’t know how lol but it’s the first fw since having it so don’t know if it’s just a one off coincidence.